Showdown at the Stock Exchange

0:00:00 Don Confetti: Robert Moses didn't try to play Faerie and Hell against each other, he successfully played Faerie and Hell against each other.

0:00:06 Ally: Wait, so he has everything now, right?

0:00:08 Esther: Sinatra's Law, the Imperial Axiom. If you can make it here…

0:00:11 Rowan: You can make it anywhere.

0:00:12 Brennan: [imitates explosion] You appear to David.

0:00:15 Kugrash: You don't have to forgive me, but I'm sorry.

0:00:16 David: I don't have to forgive you? Well, that's nice to hear. Have a nice rest of your life, you fuckin' rat.

0:00:21 Esther: My family's been cursed.

0:00:22 Sofia: We're gonna find a way to get rid of that curse.

0:00:24 Robert: You think people make choices?

0:00:26 Kingston: I do.

0:00:27 Robert: The big choices already got made for them.

0:00:30 Kingston: Well, Mr. Moses, how about this? You have a choice. Where you can leave this city. And I will not come for you.

0:00:37 Brennan: You rush to St. Owen's, you see Liz in traction on life support.

0:00:43 Esther: The eagle got back to me! There's a spell happening tonight at the stock exchange! [END RECAP] [dramatic music]

0:00:56 Brennan: Welcome, one and all to another exciting episode of The Unsleeping City! Robert Moses, King of the Undead, wheeler and dealer, mastermind of the highway hex is here, concocting a ritual on the floor of the den of evil itself, the New York Stock Exchange! [imitates explosion] Pete, you feel that infection deep in the heart of this place, wum-wum-wum-wum-wum.

0:01:28 Ally: [staring at the battleset] Of course.

0:01:29 Brennan: You have called out to each other you have said what needed to be said, and it is going to be Kugrash as the first to act.

0:01:37 Ally: We're missing Rowan.

0:01:39 Brennan: Oh, Rowan, that's right!

0:01:41 Pete: Has anyone seen Rowan, I—

0:01:43 Brennan: Rowan does dash in. Brennan hands Siobhan her brand new Rowan mini.

0:01:46 Siobhan: Oh my goodness!

0:01:47 Lou: Wow, look at her!

0:01:48 Murph: So spritely!

0:01:49 Lou: Look at that.

0:01:50 Emily: Let me see!

0:01:51 Siobhan: I haven't changed any of my outfits, I'm just young and hot now. [laughter]

0:01:56 Lou: Wow.

0:01:57 Ally: Cool!

0:01:58 Brennan: Young-- [laughs]

0:01:59 Kugrash: Pete—

0:02:01 Pete: Hey, we’re both wearing hats! We're the only two wearing hats, that's so crazy! Brennan, taking a sip of water, chokes on it from laughing and has to cover his mouth for a second.

0:02:05 Zac: Uh-oh, uh-oh!

0:02:05 Lou: Brennan, are you okay?

0:02:06 Ally: Uh-oh! No!

0:02:11 Brennan: Oh no. (gruffly) We begin! (Normally) Kugrash, you are first to act, my friend. [dramatic, tense, drum-heavy music]

0:02:19 Murph: All right. So I've got my fire elemental here that I had summoned on the way over, I have my new watch, gives me Haste, it doesn't say if it uses an action to use--

0:02:29 Brennan: It does not use an action, but it only lasts for one round. So it's a free round where you have Haste on you.

0:02:33 Murph: Oh, interesting, okay. Then I might save it for now. I think Kugrash--

0:02:39 Brennan: The old rat with his huge, chunky Rolex-- [laughter]

0:02:42 Murph: I'm gonna summon the juiciest cockroach I know,

0:02:46 Kugrash: Cockrash! I summon thee! [groans]

0:02:50 Ally: Come on!

0:02:51 Kugrash: What, it's my name in the cockroach! Cockrash!

0:02:55 Brennan: Oh!

0:02:56 Kingston: You have to understand what that sounds like.

0:02:57 Cockrash: [high-pitched] Hi there, hey there, Kugrash!

0:02:59 Brennan: Where does this little—

0:03:00 Murph: He's coming just to give everybody some HP.

0:03:03 Pete: Get the fuck away from me.

0:03:04 Emily: How much HP?

0:03:06 Siobhan: So much now, right?

0:03:07 Kingston: Thank you, Pete, now you understand.

0:03:08 Brennan: How much HP does everybody gain?

0:03:09 Murph: So it is 9, 5 plus my druid level, so 14.

0:03:13 Emily: And then, if I leave this, do I still get it?

0:03:15 Murph: Yes.

0:03:16 Emily: Hey!

0:03:16 Lou: Are there any other benefits to staying in the aura of the juicy cockroach?

0:03:19 Murph: It'll give you advantage on Strength throws, but that's not really as important. And then I'm going to use my crown to summon rats.

0:03:29 Brennan: Incredible. [imitates thunderous sound]

0:03:31 Lou: It's 14? We got 14 hit points?

0:03:33 Murph: Yes.

0:03:34 Emily: Yeah!

0:03:34 Ally: That's amazing.

0:03:35 Siobhan: We’re powerful.

0:03:36 Lou: I'm at 99.

0:03:37 Ally: I'm at 93!

0:03:38 Emily: A Cockrash that makes you stronger.

0:03:40 Lou: (face in hand) Ugh!

0:03:41 Brennan: Place them wherever, wheresoever you like.

0:03:43 Zac: That's pretty good.

0:03:44 Murph: I'll do—

0:03:45 Emily and Ally: What are you at?

0:03:46 Zac: 108.

0:03:47 Emily: Woo!

0:03:48 Ally: Oh, you fucker!

0:03:49 Emily: I'm at 88, but I love to get hurt.

0:03:51 Siobhan: Yeah, me and Sofia are on 88.

0:03:52 Murph: I'll have them kind of jamming up that—

0:03:54 Ally: [laughs] Sofia is a full masochist? Please hurt me!

0:03:58 Siobhan: Beat me up, daddy!

0:03:59 Emily: Harm me, I want to get hurt.

0:04:01 Ally: I'm gonna shoot you in the leg.

0:04:02 Brennan: Remember, Ox gains those as well.

0:04:04 Zac: I wrote that down. That over doubles Ox.

0:04:07 Murph: Oh sweet. Oh yeah, and also give it to my fire elemental.

0:04:10 Lou: My man, you got four rats out?

0:04:13 Murph: Yes.

0:04:14 Lou: Damn

0:04:14 Brennan: You see, yeah, Kugrash, you go into the Stock Exchange, you were a different man the last time you were here. In fact, you're not a man at all any longer, you're a fuckin' rat! And whoom, fire, rats, cockroach, the fuckin' filth of New York springs into the Stock Exchange, all of your rats and the cockroach all go,

0:04:32 Cockrash: Ugh, this place feels fuckin' gross.

0:04:34 Kugrash: [shouts] We're gonna burn it down! Return it to the earth!

0:04:38 Cockrash: Smells like cocaine and piss and Axe Body Spray in here, it's fuckin' awful.

0:04:43 Rats: [high-pitched] To arms, to arms, brothers!

0:04:45 Kugrash: Yes!

0:04:47 Brennan: Great. So you—

0:04:48 Murph: Can I run forward and I don't want to break my concentration on this guy, so I don't want to get hit, so I want to, can I hop in one of these little guys?

0:04:54 Brennan: Yeah, go ahead and hop in!

0:04:55 Murph: I want to hide in there. So that should, I'm in there.

0:04:58 Brennan: Cool, dope. Wonderful. That is going to be, see Moses says,

0:05:07 Robert: All right. Let's cut it out, shall we?

0:05:13 Brennan: [imitates blasting sounds] Kiosks around the trade floor begin to change and morph—

0:05:16 Emily: Did I tell you, I was like, oh God, what are you doing?

0:05:20 Zac: Too fast for my own good.

0:05:22 Murph: It felt like this.

0:05:24 Ally: Same, I was like, it's the only thing to switch. [Brennan imitates explosion]

0:05:28 Siobhan: Oops.

0:05:29 Lou: Jesus.

0:05:32 Brennan: They go.

0:05:35 Zac: Are those vampires in robots?

0:05:37 Brennan: Yep, those are vampires piloting kiosk mechs of stock floor trading stuff, with a little— Emily claps.

0:05:44 Zac: Incredible, but I'm so mad.

0:05:45 Siobhan: Such bullshit, but I love-- [laughter]

0:05:46 Emily: I think it's great. I cannot wait to be hurt by them. Finally, an honorable foe! [Siobhan laughs]

0:05:53 Brennan: You see that one of them says,

0:05:55 Kiosk Vampire: Oh boy, get a load of this, a bunch of humanities majors coming in and telling us how we should run our arcane dark ritual. [imitates mechanical whooshing]

0:06:04 Brennan: These guys rush over here. Boom, boom. These guys are actually just going to close with the rats here. Awesome. That's going to be...

0:06:18 Murph: Does the fire elemental go on my turn, or--

0:06:20 Brennan: The fire elemental goes on your turn, so you want the fire elemental to go, it can. Oh, I thought you were done with your turn, I'm sorry.

0:06:25 Murph: Oh sorry, I yeah, I'd like the fire elemental I guess to attack one of these guys.

0:06:30 Brennan: Yeah, go for it, have the fire elemental attack one of 'em.

0:06:32 Murph: Sweet. He gets two attacks. 12 to hit, so he’s not going to do anything.

0:06:39 Brennan: Nope.

0:06:40 Murph: [laughs] 10 to hit.

0:06:42 Brennan: Nope.

0:06:43 Murph: It's got a plus 6, I'm just doing bad! [Ally laughs]

0:06:46 Brennan: Awesome. These vampires are gonna go for, one is coming for Sofia.

0:06:52 Sofia: Bring it on!

0:06:55 Brennan: That's gonna be a miss, one goes for Ricky. That's gonna be a miss as well. All right. That is now going to be, and then the vampires are gonna go for the rats.

0:07:09 Murph: Oh no.

0:07:10 Brennan: What are the rats' AC?

0:07:12 Murph: 10. [laughs]

0:07:14 Lou: Come on, rats!

0:07:15 Siobhan: Squished.

0:07:15 Ally: They didn't get juicy cockroach? Oh, that's not AC, all right.

0:07:20 Brennan: Cool. Your first rat swarm takes 7 points of damage.

0:07:27 Murph: Okay.

0:07:28 Brennan: Next one takes 9 points of damage.

0:07:31 Murph: Oh, okay.

0:07:32 Brennan: Also, I don't believe that swarms can be grappled, right?

0:07:35 Murph: No, they can't. Immune… grapple, yeah.

0:07:40 Brennan: Cool. Yeah, the vampires just start slogging through those two swarms of rats. That's going to be Sofia.

0:07:46 Emily: Okay. I am going to just jump all the way there. [points at a high balcony] I'm gonna use my entire action and a ki point Step of the Wind, and with the help of my Louboutins, I will soar through the air.

0:08:02 Pete: You're welcome, guys. I stopped doing drugs, so I had a shit ton of extra money.

0:08:06 Kugrash: Oh, thank you.

0:08:07 Pete: I bought you all luxury items.

0:08:09 Sofia: Thank you so much!

0:08:09 Ricky: You bought me a Maserati?

0:08:11 Pete: Yeah, dude, I knew you'd love it. Ricky looks confused. [laughter]

0:08:13 Rowan: Drugs are so expensive! I have literally never bought them every time I've taken them.

0:08:17 Pete: Really?

0:08:18 Brennan: Do you have Otherworldly Leap active now or not?

0:08:21 Emily: I do not. But it is still, I calculated it, and it's under--

0:08:25 Brennan: Your long jump with just Step of the Wind and the magic boots is 78 feet horizontally, which should be able to reach.

0:08:31 Emily: Oh, I thought it was 90-something.

0:08:34 Brennan: No. I got the calculator up right here. So it's 78, which is about, we'll just round that up to 80. So, but, you can also run and take a running start, 'cause your movement with Step of the Wind and using your action will be enough to get there and jump up. However, one of them is going to take an attack of opportunity on you.

0:08:56 Emily: Bring it on, come on! Get it, would now be the time that I would have to throw up Shield?

0:09:01 Brennan: Now would be the time before I announce it that you have to throw up Shield.

0:09:04 Emily: Yeah, I'm gonna throw up Shield, I want to get over there, and if he grapples me, that's gonna fuck with me.

0:09:08 Brennan: Does a 24 still hit you?

0:09:12 Emily: Yeah, it does. I think it's 24.

0:09:14 Brennan: One of them reaches out, doesn't deal any damage, but grapples you and brings your movement to zero.

0:09:19 Sofia: Ugh! Motherfucker, now I'm pissed!

0:09:23 Brennan: So this vampire doesn't deal any damage, grapples you, moves you to zero, but you still have your action.

0:09:27 Emily: All right, I'm gonna fuckin' attack him. You little fuckin' asshole.

0:09:30 Ally: How do, oh sorry.

0:09:32 Brennan: Cool.

0:09:33 Emily: What do I have, what do I have? What do I have, think! Okay. Aw, does a 17 hit, no, 18 hit?

0:09:43 Brennan: An eight—

0:09:44 Emily: No, I'm sorry! 15.

0:09:47 Brennan: A 15 does not hit. [fist slams]

0:09:49 Emily: What about my backslam? No, I used my bonus action. Oh, all right.

0:09:54 Brennan: But you do, you can use both attacks on him.

0:09:56 Emily: Oh right duh!

0:09:57 Brennan: Because you do have Extra Attack, yeah.

0:09:59 Emily: Whoo! That also doesn't hit. Okay, I just go limp.

0:10:03 Brennan: You see that you go— You go to jump, and this huge, [imitates mechanical whizzing] claw grabs you.

0:10:09 Kiosk Vampire: Oh, no, no, no, I'm sorry. We're not gonna be interrupted, we're conducting a big ritual right now. Sorry about that.

0:10:15 Sofia: Okay, if you're gonna at least, if you're going to stop me, could you at least do damage, because I'd like to get below 10 hit points.

0:10:21 Kiosk Vampire: Oh, we'll do damage.

0:10:23 Sofia: Okay. Thanks.

0:10:24 Brennan: You see—

0:10:25 Lou: Oh.

0:10:26 Brennan: Cool. That's Sofia. The vampires are gonna go again.

0:10:30 Siobhan: What?

0:10:32 Murph: Yipes.

0:10:33 Brennan: The one that's got you there, Sofia, is going to attack. Miss. [Lou snickers]

0:10:40 Sofia: I thought you said you were going to do damage.

0:10:44 Kiosk Vampire: It’s hard, I'm having a hard time!

0:10:47 Brennan: One of them, so this one's got you right now, Sofia.

0:10:51 Emily: He's essentially just holding me as I try to run away.

0:10:53 Brennan: As you try to run away, exactly.

0:10:55 Siobhan: Pushing against your forehead as... [Emily laughs]

0:10:59 Brennan: These guys take another swing and deal, this time 9 points to the first rat swarm that was injured.

0:11:08 Murph: Okay.

0:11:11 Brennan: Other one misses the other rat swarm. And then one's gonna go for Ricky. And is going to miss Ricky again.

0:11:19 Siobhan: Dope.

0:11:21 Brennan: Cool. That's going to now be Pete.

0:11:25 Emily: Oh, wait a second! When he, oh, are there any guys within 5 feet of him? Goddammit, no. Nevermind.

0:11:29 Zac: [to Emily] Oh, that would be sick.

0:11:32 Ally: I'm gonna run.

0:11:34 Brennan: Cool.

0:11:36 Ally: What do I get as a normal move again? Six?

0:11:38 Brennan: Six, yeah.

0:11:39 Ally: Yeah. [whispers] One, two...

0:11:41 Kingston: Be careful, Pete!

0:11:43 Ally: Five, six. And then I'm going to cast Vitriolic Sphere on Bob Moses.

0:11:55 Brennan: Hell yeah.

0:11:56 Ally: So there, that's not a roll or anything.

0:12:00 Brennan: Cool, range, yeah. You just do it. Awesome. So yeah. Each one in the room has to make a Dexterity saving throw. Buh-buh-buh. Wild. Cool, go ahead and roll damage.

0:12:17 Ally: Yeah, did he save, or do I roll the damage first?

0:12:20 Brennan: On failed save, creature takes 10d4, on a successful save creature takes half damage and no damage at the end of its next turn. So he's gonna roll the save.

0:12:27 Ally: Can I use everyone's d4s, I need 10.

0:12:29 Siobhan: Wow.

0:12:29 Murph: Shit.

0:12:31 Emily: Yeah, baby. Purple and pink are so--

0:12:33 Murph: Do you need more?

0:12:34 Brennan: He does save.

0:12:36 Emily: Come on, purple and pink! Get them 4s! Come on.

0:12:40 Lou: (leaning over to Emily) Let's see how our kids do.

0:12:41 Ally: Oh, this is 10, perfect, all right.

0:12:43 Lou: Let's go, let's go.

0:12:44 Emily: Make mama proud. Make mama proud. Okay, one of them says 3.

0:12:49 Ally: Okay, we got a 3. 4. 7. 8. 9, 10. 12. 16. 20. 24.

0:12:54 Emily: [crosstalk, to Lou] Okay, so I got the five…

0:12:57 Lou: [crosstalk, to Emily] I only got a one.

0:13:00 Ally: So he takes 12.

0:13:00 Lou: [quietly to Emily] I feel bad, I feel bad.

0:13:01 Brennan: Hell yeah.

0:13:01 Emily: [crosstalk] You’ve spoiled them as well.

0:13:02 Ally: But does that stop any sort of, is he in concentration or—

0:13:06 Brennan: So he takes 12, he's gonna roll a concentration check. Which he succeeds.

0:13:15 Ally: Can I make an Insight check to see what is going on with this blood on the ground?

0:13:18 Brennan: Sure, absolutely.

0:13:20 Ally: Cool, okay, yeah. That is a lot. 20.

0:13:27 Brennan: You look at it, what would it be if it was an Arcana check? Just asking.

0:13:31 Ally: Oh cool. Also 20.

0:13:33 Brennan: Also 20. You look at it, there is insane money magic happening here. All these symbols are currency symbols drawn in blood on the floor, and you see that he is calling the infection that is tapping into the Golden Door and he is unable to enter the dream realm, but is casting magic through this web in the dream realm, though he cannot enter it.

0:14:01 Ally: Cool. And the cantrip isn't a bonus action, right? That would be a full action.

0:14:04 Brennan: No, some cantrips are, but it will say on the cantrip if it is.

0:14:07 Ally: Okay, cool, awesome. Thanks, everybody. These look so cool.

0:14:09 Emily: Right?

0:14:10 Lou: We have great dice.

0:14:12 Brennan: Hell yeah. Pete, go ahead and give me a Wild Magic roll.

0:14:14 Ally: Oh yeah, fuck. 14.

0:14:19 Brennan: Cool.

0:14:20 Ally: [handing the dice back] These are everyone’s.

0:14:20 Siobhan: I'll pass them on.

0:14:21 Ally: Grab yours.

0:14:23 Brennan: Kingston, that's going to be you.

0:14:24 Lou: Okay, my man. How electric are, yeah. How electronic do these mechs look?

0:14:32 Brennan: They look pretty fucking electric.

0:14:35 Lou: I'd like to cast a fifth level Shutdown spell. [Everyone] Oh!

0:14:37 Siobhan: Shut it down!

0:14:40 Lou: And so all electronic devices not in use will shut down and I believe each one of these mechs will have to make, anything that's not in use will get shut down.

0:14:50 Emily: Not in use. These can't be turned into them.

0:14:51 Lou: And then these four dudes will all make Constitution saving throws, and if they succeed, I think they prevent it. But if they don't, their electronic device will be shut down and cannot be restarted.

0:15:06 Ally: [whispering] Fuck yeah.

0:15:07 Emily: Is this like a sleep spell, almost?

0:15:08 Brennan: Holy shit, no there's, they can do Constitution saves to try and avoid it, but Kingston, this is some powerful fucking magic.

0:15:16 Ally: Level 5!

0:15:18 Lou: 5! [clapping and cheering]

0:15:19 Brennan: Incredible.

0:15:20 Emily: Is this your first level 5?

0:15:21 Brennan: What is Kingston's step up, 'cause you are fuckin', you just called out Robert Moses.

0:15:25 Lou: Yeah, I step forward, I say,

0:15:27 Kingston: You stupid motherfucker! [laughter]

0:15:30 Emily: Yeah!

0:15:31 Kingston: You come for my family! You come for my friends! I will fuckin' drop you, and anyone you attempt to bring at me!

0:15:37 Lou: And then I just slam my fuckin' fists on the ground.

0:15:39 Brennan: You guys hear the roar of crowds from all over the city as New Year's Eve celebration lend all of their power and, [imitates thunderous sound], all of these kiosks that were on, the screens fucking blow out and they shut down. The only things that get a roll are Moses and the tickers up here, and these four here.

0:16:01 Emily: Oh my God.

0:16:02 Brennan: So I'm gonna roll for them.

0:16:03 Emily: I hope my guy fucks up!

0:16:05 Brennan: Buh-buh-buh, so this is a Constitution saving throw against a DC17.

0:16:10 Sofia: Did anyone else notice that Kingston called us his friends?

0:16:12 Pete: Yeah! And I was so happy. [laughter]

0:16:16 Brennan: Okay. You see Kingston, you burn through with holy power of this city, this one dodges behind a kiosk, all of the rest, vampires, go ahead actually and make a Religion check for me.

0:16:39 Lou: Dut-dut-doo, only 7.

0:16:40 Brennan: Mm-hmm. Cool. You're not sure exactly what you're seeing, but you see that these undead, undead are creatures more so than fiends or celestials or fae or anybody, undead are creatures of pure willpower. By the strength of their will alone, they cling to life after death. They have a pool, an extremely limited pool, of times where they can burn through some of that willpower to straight up just resist magical effects. You see that three of these have to dig deep into that pool of stuff that's literally keeping them alive to prevent your spell from working. None of the mechs shut down, all of them have used a vital resource to prevent that from happening. I'm gonna roll for Robert Moses, 'cause this range on this spell is fucking crazy. Does he, no, he doesn't get advantage on this. Okay. Okay.

0:17:41 Siobhan: Wait, does that mean that Robert Moses is mechanical?

0:17:43 Brennan: No, it means that he's protecting this spell up here on the ticker. He successfully does that, he does not burn up some of his resistance. That is your action, are you taking any moves?

0:17:56 Lou: Yeah, I'll move up just behind Pete.

0:18:00 Brennan: Okay. Wild. That was extreme, I know that feels like they're still active, but the thing that they've burned up is incredibly valuable. That is now going to be… Mr. Moses. You see that Robert looks out and says, [dramatic music]

0:18:32 Robert: As I call upon the names of those that have passed, and the power given to me of life and death,

0:18:42 Brennan: And you see that all of the money figures on the tickers begin to go up and down, up and down, you see that he goes,

0:18:48 Robert: Neither Heaven nor Hell can claim me.

0:18:53 Brennan: And he pulls Santa's list out of his coat, and whoom, it glows, and then he just discards it casually to the floor, no longer needing it. He also casts a spell on himself, anyone's welcome to make an Arcana check if they'd like.

0:19:10 Siobhan: I would like to cast Counterspell on whatever it is.

0:19:11 Brennan: You are not in range. 60 ft.

0:19:13 Siobhan: Goddamn!

0:19:15 Ally: 16.

0:19:15 Zac: Oh!

0:19:15 Brennan: 16.

0:19:17 Zac: I got a...

0:19:18 Siobhan: I'll do an Arcana check.

0:19:19 Zac: What was it, Arcana?

0:19:20 Lou: 11.

0:19:20 Siobhan: 5.

0:19:21 Zac: 17. Just a flat 17, I have nothing to Arcana.

0:19:25 Brennan: A flat 17, you got a 16. You remember this from one of the phantasma memories from the Metropolitan Museum of Memories. He's casting a powerful anti-magic spell on himself. Like, big whammy anti-magic stuff that's almost like a force field or bubble through which magic cannot pass on him. Ricky, you recognize this from the night you were flirting with Esther and looking at magic books, it's called a Globe of Invulnerability.

0:19:50 Ricky: Guys, I think this is the Globe of Invulnerability. [laughter]

0:19:53 Pete: What does that mean? What?

0:19:57 Brennan: Awesome.

0:19:58 Ricky: Nothing can get, uhhhh...

0:19:59 Emily: It's probably gonna be really hard to get to him or something.

0:20:01 Ally: I'm gonna shoot him.

0:20:02 Siobhan: Yeah, we should just fuck him up.

0:20:04 Brennan: Cool. That's going to be Ricky.

0:20:08 Zac: Okay.

0:20:10 Brennan: Oh sorry, no, no, no. That was Robert, that's right, that's going to be Rowan.

0:20:13 Siobhan: Wonderful. So this Locate Creature is still running, can I figure out who one of these vampires is, dismiss the spell, and then cast a different spell, or is that—

0:20:25 Brennan: Sure, yeah, absolutely.

0:20:25 Siobhan: Great. So I would like to figure out which one of these people fucked up my friend.

0:20:28 Brennan: The Locate Creature was cast by this vampire over here.

0:20:33 Siobhan: Okay, great. So I let Kingston know,

0:20:36 Rowan: Hey Kingston, it's the one to your left. That's the guy you want to fuck up.

0:20:39 Kingston: Good to know. Thank you.

0:20:40 Ally: We both look at each other like…

0:20:43 Siobhan: And then how large would you say these kiosks were? Object-wise, would you say that they were large?

0:20:49 Brennan: I would say that they were large, yes.

0:20:51 Siobhan: Great. So I would like to cast Animate Objects. So I can do 10 objects. But it's 10 tiny objects and each large object counts as 4 objects, so I can get 2 of them. So what I would like to do is, I would like to Misty Step up to here.

0:21:18 Brennan: Okay. You're not going to be able to cast two spells in a round if you Misty Step.

0:21:21 Siobhan: Fuck, you're right, shit.

0:21:22 Ally: Climb.

0:21:23 Zac: Can’t you just do it from the ground?

0:21:24 Siobhan: I definitely can't climb.

0:21:26 Pete: I could give you a hand.

0:21:28 Rowan: No.

0:21:28 Kingston: Okay, Pete.

0:21:29 Kugrash: All right, Pete, calm down.

0:21:30 Kingston: Head in the game, Pete!

0:21:31 Pete: [defensively] I would give anyone a hand!

0:21:33 Ricky: Thanks, Pete!

0:21:34 Pete: You're welcome. Ricky grins and wiggles his shoulders.

0:21:35 Siobhan: How far away is that bell up there? That cute, tiny little bell?

0:21:43 Brennan: That cute, tiny little bell? That's probably 150 feet away, or something like that.

0:21:48 Siobhan: Great, so, I'm gonna fuckin' risk the attack of opportunity on me from this guy coming.

0:21:56 Ally: He's grappling someone, though.

0:21:57 Siobhan: Oh yeah, he's already grappling Sofia, so he can't grapple a second person, right?

0:22:01 Brennan: He actually can’t, well, do what you're gonna do.

0:22:03 Siobhan: Great, well, I'm gonna run so that I'm within 120 feet of the bell.

0:22:10 Brennan: Yes. Although Sofia, he actually, no. He's actually already used his reaction to--

0:22:15 Siobhan: Great.

0:22:16 Brennan: Grab Sofia, so you actually are free.

0:22:18 Siobhan: Dope, so I'll get within 120 feet of that.

0:22:21 Brennan: Cool. One, two, three, four, five. Let me see if that's… Yep, you're within 120.

0:22:31 Pete: Hey. Did you want to talk or something?

0:22:35 Rowan: Not right now.

0:22:37 Pete: Weird, mixed signals.

0:22:40 Siobhan: And I would like to animate these two ones in the middle right here.

0:22:49 Brennan: Incredible.

0:22:50 Siobhan: And then the bell.

0:22:52 Brennan: And then the bell!

0:22:52 Siobhan: Yes.

0:22:53 Brennan: Awesome!

0:22:55 Siobhan: Oh, mm. Actually, would you say that the door, how big would you say the door was?

0:23:05 Brennan: Oh, the door?

0:23:07 Siobhan: Yeah, the door directly behind Robert Moses.

0:23:09 Brennan: I'd say it's medium. Medium size.

0:23:11 Siobhan: Great, so a medium target counts as two objects, so I would like to animate those two kiosks and the door directly behind Robert Moses.

0:23:19 Brennan: Hell yeah. Great.

0:23:20 Siobhan: And then, you have the--

0:23:22 Brennan: I have the cards right here. I do.

0:23:24 Siobhan: You have door stats over there?

0:23:26 Murph: You got door stats and kiosk stats--

0:23:26 Brennan: I got stats for everything, it's based on the size of the object. Wild. Awesome. So this is normally, so the reason that you, your fire elemental's going to act on your turn 'cause you already had it as you entered. These ones, I'll need you to roll initiative for.

0:23:38 Siobhan: Okay, great. So that is a 2. Oh, so they go directly after me?

0:23:43 Brennan: Or soon.

0:23:44 Siobhan: Or soon, okay, great. That's dope. That's actually good. I'm good, I'm happy. I'm happy with that initiative.

0:23:49 Brennan: So what has happened, Rowan runs up, young, vivacious, the first battle in this new body, and what do you say to these things?

0:23:58 Rowan: It's time to get to work! [claps]

0:24:00 Brennan: This little, [claps] Broadway fairy princess magic, you see the two kiosks go, Whoom!

0:24:08 Kiosks: [singing, deep-voiced] It's time to get to work! Time to fight on behalf of Rowan, bum, bum, buh-bum!

0:24:13 Brennan: And you see the door says,

0:24:15 Door: [singing] Let me open! [sound of door slamming]

0:24:19 Brennan: Ka-koom! And slams into Robert Moses's ass. Incredible. That's your movement and your action. Anything else?

0:24:28 Siobhan: Oh! Then I'm gonna turn to Kingston and say,

0:24:38 Rowan: Hey. I believe in you.

0:24:42 Kingston: Thank you, that's very, okay, okay.

0:24:44 Siobhan: And I give him some Bardic Inspiration.

0:24:45 Kingston: All right.

0:24:46 Siobhan: But you know, like, you know, if your wife, it doesn't work out with her, I'm always, you know, I'm just, I’m still here.

0:24:51 Pete: I'm crushed. [laughs] I'm so crushed!

0:24:55 Rowan: It’s 2018, why are you so...

0:24:59 Brennan: Incredible.

0:25:00 Rowan: Don't be so exhausting, Pete!

0:25:02 Pete: You were just so rude to me! You just clearly, I mean, if you liked both of us, that would be fine, but you just clearly don't like me and love him.

0:25:10 Brennan: Cool. Another legendary actions, this vampire's gonna grab Sofia, slam you up against the wall over here, you don't take any damage.

0:25:17 Emily: What?

0:25:18 Brennan: This one's gonna take another swing at Ricky.

0:25:20 Sofia: Give me damage!

0:25:21 Brennan: Ricky. You are grappled by this one over here.

0:25:25 Zac: Okay. Oh, do I, nevermind.

0:25:29 Brennan: These two are gonna take some more swings. That's gonna be a hit. That's, and that's gonna be a crit.

0:25:35 Emily: Fuck.

0:25:36 Zac: On who?

0:25:37 Brennan: That's gonna be another 9 damage to the rats over there.

0:25:40 Murph: Okay, they're not looking good.

0:25:43 Siobhan: That's what they're there for.

0:25:44 Brennan: And then the other is gonna be 7 points of damage to the other rats.

0:25:49 Murph: 'Kay. They're looking a little better.

0:25:50 Ally: They're at least taking them off our hands, that's great.

0:25:54 Siobhan: Right.

0:25:55 Murph: It's what the rats are here for.

0:25:56 Rats: [high-pitched] To arms, to arms! Let us die that a new era may dawn!

0:26:00 Kugrash: Oh, you're so brave, you beautiful bastards!

0:26:03 Brennan: Incredible. That is going to be Ricky. You are grappled.

0:26:07 Zac: : Grappled, eh? Okay. Ricky is--

0:26:12 Murph: You have advantage on Strength checks within the cockroach's thing.

0:26:14 Lou: All right!

0:26:15 Murph: So you can--

0:26:15 Zac: Oh yeah?

0:26:16 Murph: Probably get out easier than normal.

0:26:17 Zac: But it's still a massive robot, right?

0:26:19 Murph: Yeah. I think with grapple, you can still attack, right? Your speed's just zero?

0:26:24 Zac: Yeah.

0:26:24 Emily: What's the cockroach's range?

0:26:25 Brennan: The actual rules, 'cause it's a little bit tricky. So the actual rules are, escaping a grapple is a full action, which is your athletics check. You can also make a shove as a single attack, so if you have the extra attack action, you can actually kind of make two attempts. But shove is you moving the thing out of your square.

0:26:45 Zac: Gotcha. Let me check this other ability I have real quick. I think… I think I'll attack it with, [laughs] I'll attack it with Ox first.

0:26:58 Brennan: Cool.

0:26:59 Zac: It gets Pack Attack, Pack Tactics.

0:27:01 Brennan: Cool.

0:27:02 Zac: Okay, so… Ooh, a nat 20.

0:27:06 Brennan: Whoa! Does Ox deal radiant damage or no?

0:27:08 Emily: Crit for the pup.

0:27:10 Zac: I don't know.

0:27:11 Brennan: I don't know if he does or not.

0:27:13 Zac: I don't think so, I don't think—

0:27:14 Brennan: He is made of light.

0:27:16 Zac: If you want, can he?

0:27:17 Brennan: Yeah, I want to say it's radiant damage.

0:27:19 Zac: Okay, cool. And that's, and it's only 2d4.

0:27:23 Brennan: Cool.

0:27:23 Zac: But that's doubled, right?

0:27:26 Brennan: Yes.

0:27:27 Zac: A 4d4?

0:27:27 Brennan: 4d4.

0:27:27 Zac: And then plus 4. Okay. Ooh, 6. 11 plus 4. So we did 15 to that, and then now it has to take a DC11 Strength saving throw to not be knocked prone.

0:27:43 Brennan: Wait, how much damage is that again?

0:27:44 Zac: 15.

0:27:46 Brennan: Jesus.

0:27:47 Zac: And that's 15 regular damage.

0:27:48 Brennan: You see as Ox, 15 regular damage, makes a DC10—

0:27:51 Zac: 11. [laughs]

0:27:52 Brennan: A DC11. It succeeds.

0:27:57 Zac: The massive robot wasn't knocked over by the dalmatian? [laughter]

0:28:00 Brennan: No, but that would be pretty fuckin' wild.

0:28:03 Zac: Okay.

0:28:04 Brennan: It does that. Yeah, Ox does the damage. You see Ox's bite with that light in it burns the machine, and you see the vampire inside goes,

0:28:14 Vampire: [screams] Gah!

0:28:15 Brennan: And screams at that radiant damage.

0:28:17 Zac: Okay, well then, I'm going to cast Branding Smite as a bonus action.

0:28:21 Brennan: Cool.

0:28:22 Zac: And then, and I have to call it before I hit, right?

0:28:25 Brennan: Yes, you do.

0:28:26 Zac: Okay. And just try to hit it. Ooh, does a 26 hit?

0:28:33 Brennan: Sure does.

0:28:34 Zac: Okay. Then I'll swing my second attack. Does a 20 hit?

0:28:41 Brennan: A 26 and a 20 both hit.

0:28:43 Zac: Okay.

0:28:44 Brennan: And you are, you're not shoving, in other words, you're just wailing.

0:28:49 Zac: I'm just wailing on it.

0:28:50 Brennan: Cool, dope.

0:28:51 Zac: Branding Smite is also radiant damage.

0:28:56 Brennan: Woo!

0:28:58 Zac: So 2d6 of radiant damage I'm adding to this. Ah, whoops. All right, so that's 9 plus… 9 plus 9 of radiant. And then on my second attack—

0:29:16 Brennan: And you're adding that plus from normal, just plus to your damage, right? D8 plus 8 plus radiant, right?

0:29:23 Zac: Yes, that's what I'm doing. I rolled a 1.

0:29:24 Brennan: 18 from the first one.

0:29:27 Zac: And then for my second attack, I'll also do just a level 1 Smite.

0:29:32 Brennan: Cool.

0:29:33 Zac: If I can do that.

0:29:34 Brennan: Go for it.

0:29:35 Zac: So...

0:29:36 Brennan: And you add an extra d8, because these are undead.

0:29:38 Zac: Oh, then I, should I add that to the first attack as well?

0:29:40 Brennan: But you were doing a Branding Smite, not a Divine Smite on the first—

0:29:44 Zac: Sure, sure, sure. So now it's, so, okay. So that would be 3d8 total.

0:29:48 Brennan: 3d8 total.

0:29:49 Zac: Okay. So… 15 plus….

0:29:54 Brennan: 4d8, 'cause it's 2d8 from, a first level Smite is 2d8 damage, plus the d8 from your normal ax.

0:30:00 Zac: Okay.

0:30:00 Brennan: Plus another d8 'cause they're undead.

0:30:01 Zac: Okay.

0:30:01 Brennan: So for that second attack, you're rolling 4d8 plus 8.

0:30:04 Zac: Okay, so 15 for the first two. And then 3, 18 plus 8, 26?

0:30:10 Brennan: Jesus! Hell yeah. You guys see Ricky's being held up in a claw and just, boom, boom, boom! Just hacking away at electronics as this, the cockpit fills with smoke and the vampire starts coughing. Cool. That is your turn, you're still grappled. That is—

0:30:29 Zac: I should have gotten out of this.

0:30:32 Brennan: Buh-buh-bum.

0:30:36 Zac: Okay. [Brennan imitates sputtering sounds]

0:30:40 Zac: What.

0:30:41 Siobhan: Oh shit. [Brennan imitates electronic ticking]

0:30:43 Brennan: The little stock ticker goes from green to red. The objects can go.

0:30:49 Siobhan: Oh. Well, I'd like to start off with the door, going for Robert Moses.

0:30:58 Brennan: Sure, hold on a second. What level spell, sorry, is Animate Objects?

0:31:03 Siobhan: It's a 5th level spell.

0:31:07 Brennan: I'm so sorry. You are welcome to choose another target, the door actually cannot be animated because of Globe of Invulnerability, which is the spell that Robert cast.

0:31:17 Siobhan: Okay. And the bell is the same?

0:31:21 Brennan: The bell is the same. Anything on that dais pretty much.

0:31:24 Siobhan: I mean, there are so few other objects. Is there--

0:31:28 Brennan: You can animate, if you want to animate your umbrella, you're welcome to do that.

0:31:33 Zac: Is there a piece, like a computer on that thing?

0:31:36 Siobhan: Yeah, I'll animate my umbrella, so it has 30 feet of movement that's, because it doesn't have legs and arms, it flies. Cool. I'm gonna send that to attack Robert Moses.

0:31:51 Brennan: Cool. Dope.

0:31:55 Siobhan: Oh wait, but the Globe of Invulnerability doesn't--

0:32:00 Brennan: There's a chance it would just cancel out the animated object—

0:32:02 Siobhan: Right, fuck. Well then, I'll send it after the robot that's attacking Sofia, then.

0:32:07 Brennan: Cool.

0:32:08 Emily: Thank you!

0:32:10 Brennan: Rad.

0:32:11 Siobhan: And then I'll have the, yeah.

0:32:12 Brennan: The other two get up and go to work on the others?

0:32:15 Siobhan: Yeah.

0:32:16 Brennan: Cool.

0:32:16 Siobhan: These two front guys.

0:32:17 Brennan: Each one takes on its own?

0:32:19 Siobhan: Yeah.

0:32:19 Brennan: Dope. Cool. Go ahead and roll your attacks for these objects.

0:32:23 Siobhan: Great.

0:32:26 Brennan: And their stats should be on the card, there.

0:32:27 Siobhan: Yes.

0:32:28 Brennan: In very itty bitty print.

0:32:29 Siobhan: So the umbrella you would say was tiny or small?

0:32:32 Brennan: I'll let you say it's medium, because it's, so you have one of those giant, old lady golf umbrellas.

0:32:37 Siobhan: Great. To hit is plus 5. Okay. So 20.

0:32:46 Brennan: 20 hits.

0:32:47 Siobhan: Great. And then the other ones, they are large, so it's plus 6. That's, one of them is a nat 20.

0:32:55 Ally: Hey!

0:32:55 Emily: Woo! An umbrella crit!

0:32:58 Siobhan: And the other one is a 4. [laughs] So, well, a 10, so--

0:33:01 Brennan: Cool, gotcha, gotcha.

0:33:02 Siobhan: I'll do the crit against the one on the left with the--

0:33:08 Emily: Oh, it was one of the—

0:33:09 Siobhan: Kingston's,

0:33:09 Rowan: I'm just gonna soften him up for you, Kingston.

0:33:10 Kingston: Good, I appreciate that.

0:33:12 Brennan: Cool. Go ahead and roll damage.

0:33:13 Siobhan: 2d6 plus 1 for the umbrella. So that's 8 damage.

0:33:21 Brennan: Over there, great.

0:33:21 Siobhan: For the umbrella, and then, large, 2d10 plus 2. Which one is a d10?

0:33:31 Brennan: That would be 4d10 plus 2.

0:33:32 Siobhan: So 4d10 plus 2. Oh I have, here we go. Well, 10, 13, 15.

0:33:47 Brennan: Damn. Cool. Yeah, it goes over and just fuckin' wallops those ones.

0:33:56 Siobhan: And--

0:33:56 Brennan: Boom boom!

0:33:57 Siobhan: Does the attack, it does, in attacking the one that's attacking Sofia, does that make it let go of its grapple, or to have to do--

0:34:03 Brennan: No.

0:34:04 Siobhan: A check to let go of its grapple?

0:34:05 Brennan: No, it doesn't have to do a check or anything like that.

0:34:06 Siobhan: Okay.

0:34:07 Brennan: We are back to Kugrash, to the top of the order.

0:34:10 Murph: Sweet. I think, can I have my monsters go before me?

0:34:12 Brennan: Yeah.

0:34:12 Murph: Is that cool, sweet. So I'll have the fire guy go after the robot that's holding Ricky.

0:34:18 Ally: [laughs] Ricky! Literally a fire is trying to help save you. [laughter]

0:34:22 Ricky: You’re on my side?

0:34:25 Kugrash: Allies at last, I got your favorite thing, you're a fireman, right?

0:34:28 Ricky: It's, I like it. [laughter]

0:34:32 Murph: Goddamn it! First one misses. 19 on the second attack.

0:34:40 Brennan: Okay.

0:34:41 Murph: Does that hit?

0:34:42 Brennan: 19 hits, yes.

0:34:43 Murph: Sweet. Okay. 8 fire damage.

0:34:53 Brennan: 8 fire damage, gotcha. [imitates roaring flames]

0:34:57 Murph: And then the rats'll go, these two guys'll go after this guy, the two guys will go after the other guy.

0:35:01 Brennan: Mm-hmm.

0:35:03 Murph: They're gonna have a hard time, I'm sure. One guy got a 17.

0:35:07 Brennan: 17 hits.

0:35:08 Murph: Sweet! That's 7 damage to the guy over here.

0:35:15 Brennan: Cool.

0:35:16 Murph: And the other two guys are gonna go. First guy misses. Second guy hits. So 20 to hit.

0:35:26 Brennan: Nice.

0:35:26 Murph: 11 damage.

0:35:27 Brennan: To this one again?

0:35:28 Murph: To the other one.

0:35:29 Brennan: The other one, gotcha, cool.

0:35:30 Murph: One missed on both sides.

0:35:31 Brennan: Gotcha.

0:35:33 Murph: And then as Kugrash, I've got Concentration going so I can't do too, too, too much, but I'm going to turn into a giant eagle.

0:35:40 Brennan: Woo!

0:35:44 Murph: I turn into a giant eagle, and hey, why not? Let's go crazy here. I turn into a giant eagle, I'm gonna use my Rolex to do haste.

0:35:54 Ally: Yes!

0:35:54 Siobhan: Sick.

0:35:55 Murph: And I'm gonna use my dash action, I have 80 flying speed, I'm gonna fly to Robert Moses.

0:36:01 Brennan: Mm-hmm.

0:36:02 Murph: And then make attacks.

0:36:03 Brennan: Hell yeah.

0:36:04 Ally: Beak attacks?

0:36:05 Murph: Yeah, it's 160 feet of movement with the--

0:36:08 Ally: Fuck yeah!  [Brennan imitates bird calls] So American! [sound of eagle screech] Fuck you and your greed!

0:36:13 Brennan: [singing] Proud to be an American!

0:36:15 Ally: [singing] Where at least I know I'm free! [normal voice] So sassy, such a sassy line!

0:36:20 Lou: [singing, waggling his finger] At least I know I'm free!

0:36:22 Ally: At least I know I’m free!

0:36:24 Brennan: Yeah. Incredible! Awesome, you've dashed towards him.

0:36:28 Murph: Sweet. 20 to hit?

0:36:29 Brennan: 20 hits!

0:36:30 Lou: Get that beak action.

0:36:30 Murph: That's my talons. My talons do 9 damage.

0:36:35 Emily: Hmm.

0:36:37 Brennan: Incredible.

0:36:38 Murph: And then I do a beak attack.

0:36:43 Kugrash: [imitates a very sad bird call] I'm a real shit eagle.

0:36:44 Ally: [laughs] Yeah! [pretends to choke in the middle of a bird call]

0:36:45 Murph: Oh, sweet! That's 22 to hit.

0:36:49 Brennan: Yeah, so how much damage does the first one do?

0:36:50 Murph: What did I say...

0:36:53 Ally: 9, I think?

0:36:54 Murph: 9, I think.

0:36:54 Brennan: 9, cool.

0:36:55 Murph: Yeah, okay. 9, and then I got 21 to hit on the second one. The beak does less, that'll be 5 damage on the second attack.

0:37:03 Brennan: Okay.

0:37:04 Ally: Fuck yeah!

0:37:05 Brennan: In-fucking-credible.

0:37:07 Ally: That's such a great look! Him under all those tickers, fighting a literal eagle. [Emily laughs]

0:37:13 Siobhan: This game is dumb as hell.

0:37:15 Ally: KFC commercial.

0:37:17 Brennan: That's Kugrash.

0:37:18 Siobhan: It's so random, people will love it.

0:37:19 Zac: Can I get his body out?

0:37:20 Brennan: Yeah, go for it. Gonna get his little rat body—

0:37:22 Lou: His body out of here.

0:37:23 Zac: Get the little rat body out of here.

0:37:25 Brennan: Get the rat body out of here. I'm going to need Kugrash to make a Wisdom saving throw at the end of his turn.

0:37:33 Murph: Yipes!

0:37:36 Emily: Hmm.

0:37:38 Murph: 19.

0:37:40 Brennan: Moses looks at you and says,

0:37:44 Robert: Bruce Kugrich, you look different than the last time I saw you. [Zac laughs]

0:37:52 Kugrash: I wasn't a rat or an eagle, yeah!

0:37:56 Robert: I'm gonna give you this one chance to run, and if you don't take it, understand me, as a man of my word.

0:38:04 Brennan: And you see that the lich Robert Moses has his eyes sink into his head.

0:38:10 Robert: I'm gonna kill you right here in front of all your friends.

0:38:15 Brennan: The fear effect does not take hold.

0:38:17 Emily: Yeah, baby! I gotta get up there, I'm immune to it.

0:38:20 Kugrash: Yipes! Hey guys, he's a lich, that's bad!

0:38:25 Pete: What does that mean? Can we Mind Link?

0:38:26 Kugrash: I think that means he can become a god or something! [laughs]

0:38:29 Brennan: That's going to be—

0:38:31 Zac: It's like a very powerful, evil...

0:38:34 Brennan: The vampires. This one is going to, has got--

0:38:41 Ally: Do the turnstiles get attack of opportunity on them?

0:38:46 Lou: [laughs] You know those turnstiles.

0:38:47 Ally: What are they? I don't know. Kiosks?

0:38:51 Brennan: Does a 19—

0:38:53 Emily: Does hit, yeah.

0:38:54 Brennan: 19 does hit. Okay. You take—

0:38:58 Emily: What are we doing?

0:39:00 Lou: What are we doing? What's the damage?

0:39:02 Emily: What's the damage, I'm ready.

0:39:03 Brennan: You take 13 damage.

0:39:05 Emily: 'Kay.

0:39:07 Brennan: And your HP max is automatically reduced by 8.

0:39:10 Emily: Okay.

0:39:11 Murph: Sheesh.

0:39:12 Brennan: So that's that one. This one's gonna go the same for Ricky. Hits. Ricky, you take… 4 damage. Your HP max is reduced by 3.

0:39:28 Emily: So how does that factor in with the cockroach thing? Does that do—

0:39:32 Brennan: I actually think that you're, because—

0:39:35 Emily: My HP max is based on what the cockroach—

0:39:36 Brennan: No, 'cause it is attacking your life force. So when it's, the hit points you're actually losing are coming out of your temp HP, when you start eating into your real hit points, that decrease will follow you and bite into your regular HP.

0:39:51 Zac: So it affects your real ones.

0:39:52 Brennan: It affects your real one, yeah. That one over there does that.

0:39:55 Emily: I don’t like that.

0:39:57 Brennan: And this one's also gonna move with you, Ricky, over here. [imitates heavy step]

0:40:02 Murph: Oh, that's bad.

0:40:02 Zac: Dammit.

0:40:04 Brennan: And then these ones are gonna go again for these fuckin' rats. That's gonna be— 10 damage to the rats over here.

0:40:15 Murph: That, wait, which side?

0:40:16 Brennan: These ones over here.

0:40:17 Murph: Dead.

0:40:18 Brennan: Cool.

0:40:18 Murph: Bye! You fought well. [Ally laughs]

0:40:22 Brennan: The other ones over here, that's gonna be another 9 damage to these ones over here.

0:40:29 Murph: 2 HP left on that—

0:40:30 Brennan: Jesus Christ!

0:40:31 Ally: Go rats!

0:40:32 Lou: Go rats.

0:40:33 Ally: They're beefy. My brothers!

0:40:35 Brennan: That is, the vampire's just smashing, [sound of thundering footsteps]

0:40:39 Kiosk Vampire: We're very effective, but these rats, they're so scrawny!

0:40:42 Rat Swarm: [high-pitched] We are many in number and strong in spirit!

0:40:45 Brennan: [normal voice] That's the vampires' turn. That's going to be now, buh-buh-bum. You also see that, except for the, this one still looks a little bit injured. One, two, three all heal their wounds. This one's still a little bit injured, that one does not heal or regenerate over in the corner.

0:41:09 Zac: Oh.

0:41:11 Murph: Oh, 'cause he's taken radiant damage?

0:41:12 Emily: He's taken radiant damage.

0:41:15 Ally: That's not fire, right? That's light?

0:41:17 Siobhan: Yeah, it's about goodness.

0:41:19 Ally: Huh, interesting.

0:41:21 Emily: I can do radiant damage if I get fucked up.

0:41:23 Brennan: Sofia, that's gonna be you.

0:41:24 Emily: Okay. Would disengage get me out of a grapple?

0:41:28 Brennan: Disengage would not get you out of a grapple. It's just about not having attacks of opportunity. So to get out of a grapple, you need to either find a way to move your, force them to move, or to just break the grapple on an Acrobatics or Athletics check. But that takes a full action.

0:41:40 Emily: Okay, I'll probably do that, I do have my Unseen Servant, can I tell my Unseen Servant to take the battery out? Or to press off?

0:41:48 Brennan: You can have, have your Unseen, actually, your Unseen Servant cannot make attacks.

0:41:51 Emily: Okay. It wouldn't be an attack, it would be sort of a menial task. Okay, yeah, that's fair. All right, so I'm going to do an Acrobatics check to get out.

0:41:59 Brennan: You can either do that or attempt to shove it, but either way.

0:42:03 Emily: And shoving it would be--

0:42:04 Brennan: Strength.

0:42:05 Emily: Strength. Would I get that strength bonus?

0:42:11 Brennan: So you can use Strength, you can use an Athletics check in place of one of your attacks, which will leave your other extra attack, or you can use Acrobatics, which is a higher score for you, but it will take your action.

0:42:21 Emily: I'm gonna take my action.

0:42:23 Brennan: Cool. Let me know what your Acrobatics roll is.

0:42:26 Emily: Okay. 26.

0:42:30 Brennan: 26, you escape the grapple. [Emily claps]

0:42:33 Siobhan: Sick.

0:42:34 Emily: And that's my action, but then I'm gonna use another ki point to take a dash.

0:42:43 Brennan: Cool.

0:42:43 Emily: And I just want to go as far as I can, I want to kick around the blood.

0:42:47 Brennan: Okay, if you—

0:42:48 Ally: I was thinking of doing that too!

0:42:49 Emily: Really?

0:42:50 Ally: Yeah.

0:42:50 Brennan: Cool. If you would like to, okay. So, if you're not taking a Disengage, this thing will get an attack of opportunity on you.

0:42:57 Emily: Oh, I have to, um.

0:43:00 Brennan: You can take the risk and hope it doesn't hit and do the dash.

0:43:03 Emily: It's going to fucking hit me.

0:43:08 Zac: Hmm.

0:43:09 Emily: Fuck it. All right, I'm just gonna take a Disengage and go as far as I can.

0:43:15 Brennan: Cool.

0:43:16 Emily: I gotta go pretty far.

0:43:17 Brennan: Yeah, 45 is not bad.

0:43:18 Emily: 45.

0:43:19 Brennan: So as your bonus action is Disengage, so you're gonna move, yeah, nine squares.

0:43:25 Emily: So, okay, yeah. I'm just gonna get up here.

0:43:27 Brennan: Cool. Start running as fast as you can. Rad. That is your turn.

0:43:35 Emily: And then, I do have a question, is Otherworldly Leap, is that something that, does that take an action for me to use? 'Cause it says that I can do it without spending a spell slot.

0:43:44 Brennan: Exactly. It doesn't take a spell slot, but you, it does take an action to cast.

0:43:48 Emily: All right. [dramatic music]

0:43:52 Brennan: [whispers] 6, 17. [normal voice] You see that Robert Moses flicks a hand at you, and a scorching ball of fire hits you for 28 points of fire damage.

0:44:02 Emily: Me?

0:44:02 Brennan: You.

0:44:03 Emily: Wait, Robert Moses?

0:44:04 Brennan: Yeah.

0:44:05 Emily: Except I do have something, fire, is it Fireball?

0:44:08 Brennan: It—

0:44:09 Emily: I have Evasion. Lets me dodge out of the way.

0:44:11 Brennan: This is an attack roll he's making, it's not a dexterity check. He just hit you with the Fire Bolt cantrip.

0:44:16 Emily: A fireball cantrip? Okay, I Hellish Rebuke him.

0:44:19 Brennan: [laughs] Awesome. You Hellish Rebuke him and his Globe of Invulnerability cancels it out.

0:44:24 Emily: All right. That was what I did.

0:44:29 Brennan: 28. Now—

0:44:31 Ally: Are you close to radiant damage?

0:44:32 Siobhan: He did 28 damage with a cantrip?

0:44:33 Brennan: Yes he did.

0:44:34 Siobhan: Fuck, man.

0:44:36 Brennan: These guys are going to take a move. One, two, three, four, five, six. This guy is not going to trigger attacks of opportunity, but moves over here to the other side of Sofia.

0:44:49 Emily: No, are you fucking kidding me?

0:44:51 Brennan: Legendary actions. Is not taking an attack yet. And then this guy is going to take another swing at these rats over here.

0:45:06 Ally: [laughs] It's really funny to look and see Ox is just next to a raging fire.

0:45:11 Brennan: 7 points to those rats over there.

0:45:12 Murph: They're gone.

0:45:13 Ally: They're just alone.

0:45:16 Brennan: And then this one's gonna take another swing at Ricky. And that's going to be… He gets a 20 on that, which I believe does hit you.

0:45:29 Zac: Hits me.

0:45:30 Brennan: And you're going to take, he opens the cockpit, brings your body down, bites into your neck and starts draining your blood.

0:45:36 Zac and Siobhan: [gasps] Fuck!

0:45:38 Brennan: You take 7 points, sorry. You take 11 points of damage, and your max is reduced by 6. That is gonna be Pete.

0:45:55 Ally: Great. [sighs] Okay, I'm gonna run and, can I try to jump through the middle of this? Jump in there and jump out, and keep running straight?

0:46:08 Brennan: You can make an Acrobatics check to be able to do that, yeah.

0:46:10 Ally: Okay. Let's see, what is my Acrobatics? It's fine. Yeah, 18.

0:46:16 Brennan: Cool. You run and whoom, your body partially separates, turning into weird, colored mist as you, [hisses] slink through there. One, two, three, four, five, six.

0:46:29 Ally: Great. And then I will cast Erupting Earth.

0:46:33 Kugrash: Careful with the anti-magic thing, kid!

0:46:35 Ally: Underneath, 'cause then maybe the whole platform will fall, if I fuck with the--

0:46:39 Brennan: Yeah, you can try to fuck with it.

0:46:41 Murph: Interesting.

0:46:42 Ally: Cool, so I'm casting Erupting Earth underneath the balcony that he's on, that starts to crumble, takes all the pillars down, causes the whole thing to drop.

0:46:52 Brennan: Hell yeah, hold on one second. What level spell is that?

0:46:55 Ally: This is a third level, but if I cast it higher, I can add d12, so I think I'll actually cast it as my fifth level spell slot.

0:47:03 Murph: Ooh fuck!

0:47:04 Lou: We're spending all of our fifth levels.

0:47:06 Siobhan: Yeah, immediately.

0:47:08 Ally: But it gives me 5d12 bludgeoning damage on a failed save.

0:47:13 Brennan: Awesome. And you're keeping it out of the range of his Globe, right?

0:47:20 Ally: Well, I'm trying to cast it under, so hopefully he and the Globe fall and encounter it.

0:47:25 Brennan: Okay. We're gonna do our first Box of Doom roll here, gang.

0:47:28 Murph: Oh my goodness.

0:47:30 Ally: Bring the fuck on!

0:47:32 Brennan: So this is gonna be 10 plus the spell’s level so 5, 15 is the difficulty as Moses is gonna try to attempt to Counterspell. As he attempts to Counterspell, what he rolls on this is... A spell at fourth level or higher… [whispers quietly] Okay. Moses, on a 10 or higher, is going to effectively counterspell this.

0:47:56 Ally: Okay. The whole thing, or—

0:47:59 Brennan: The whole thing.

0:48:00 Ally: Okay, okay.

0:48:01 Murph: Got any kind of Bend Luck thing or anything?

0:48:03 Ally: Yeah, I'm gonna Bend Luck and...

0:48:07 Zac: You don't have Bardic Inspiration or anything, right?

0:48:10 Ally: No. So I'm gonna use… A sorcery point. Those are still there.

0:48:17 Brennan: You're gonna do, are you gonna do Bend Luck?

0:48:18 Ally: Yeah.

0:48:20 Brennan: Go ahead and roll, let's see how much harder this gets for him. He's gotta roll a 12 or higher.

0:48:26 Ally: Cool.

0:48:27 Siobhan: Okay, can I, I can't, I have to Cutting Words after you roll, right?

0:48:32 Brennan: I believe so. But what can Cutting Words be used on, real quick? And is there any type of range on it?

0:48:39 Siobhan: I don't have it written down anywhere.

0:48:41 Brennan: Let me look that, that's actually very important. I'm gonna look that up real quick, just so that we're all on the same page.

0:48:47 Lou: I love being on the same page.

0:48:48 Ally: Yeah, who has some d12s? Let's just get these ready, huh?

0:48:52 Brennan: 15. Not gonna be able to do it. Here we go. On a 12 or higher, Robert Moses Counterspells this.

0:49:01 Ally: No! Motherfucker!

0:49:05 Brennan: A 13.

0:49:07 Ally: Jesus.

0:49:08 Brennan: You see--

0:49:09 Ally: If so many things had gone differently, God!

0:49:10 Emily: We’re getting so whooped here!

0:49:11 Brennan: You see, yeah, you run up, you see that Moses looks at you and goes,

0:49:19 Robert: Kid--

0:49:19 Ally: Wait!

0:49:21 Robert: What are you thinkin'?

0:49:22 Ally: I don't know if it's not too late, but I have Tides of Chaos, and once a day I get advantage on a roll, can I advantage that on my Bend Luck roll?

0:49:29 Brennan: No, advantage doesn't run on d20 rolls.

0:49:31 Ally: Oh, okay. I got it.

0:49:34 Brennan: So you, [imitates explosion] He knocks the spell out of your hand.

0:49:39 Emily: Oh! That is so mean! I hate this motherfucker!

0:49:46 Brennan: Cool. That's gonna be—

0:49:53 Murph: Yeah.

0:49:54 Brennan: Buh-buh-buh. Pete, give me a Wild Magic roll.

0:49:56 Ally: [whispers] Oh yeah, right! [normal voice] 2.

0:50:00 Siobhan: Fuck.

0:50:00 Brennan: Yep.

0:50:01 Siobhan: Okay, let's see.

0:50:02 Ally: Please be good!

0:50:03 Zac: You get to choose between two now, right?

0:50:05 Ally: Yeah.

0:50:06 Emily: You choose...

0:50:08 Zac: I mean, that's—

0:50:08 Emily: One undead among you becomes living.

0:50:19 Brennan: You feel the magic, bl-bl-bluh-bl-bluh, bubbling up inside of you.

0:50:22 Ally: You fucker! [laughs]

0:50:23 Brennan: Robert's fuckin' with you. You can either go evil to match him, or you can stay pure and try to resist what you're feeling.

0:50:35 Ally: Oh, that's so hard! [sighs] Ah… I stay good! [laughs]

0:50:45 Emily: Oh, Kingston will be so proud, though!

0:50:47 Ally: I stay good! God fuckin' dammit!

0:50:50 Emily: Say it all out loud so Kingston knows!

0:50:51 Lou: Say it so I know I'm proud. Let me know I should be proud of you.

0:50:58 Brennan: The magic surges through your body, and all, this is literally sort of what it says, all chemical addiction within you, every residual toxin, every bit of poison, is, whoom, pushed out of you as you glow with radiant light.

0:51:14 Emily: Yes!

0:51:14 Ally: I start crying. I start truly weeping, I'm on my knees.

0:51:18 Emily: Is it just me, or does this feel like a fuckin' Phish concert in here, now? What?

0:51:24 Brennan: Incredible. At the end of Pete's turn, There, this one's gonna, I'll take a swing. Boom. Deals 4 points of damage to you, Ricky. And then, this one's going to finish moving to Sofia. [imitates thunderous movement] They're super fast. This one's gonna make an attack. Misses, Sofia, you are not grappled.

0:51:56 Emily: Thank you!

0:51:57 Zac: Is one of them shut down, or no?

0:51:59 Brennan: No, none of them are shut down. This one's going to take a swing, actually, this one's gonna fight the fuckin' kiosk that is right in front of it. And misses that one.

0:52:09 Emily: Wait a second, he missed on me? He tried to attack me and missed on me?

0:52:12 Brennan: Yeah.

0:52:13 Emily: [claps] Tipsy Sway, bitch! You gotta attack him!

0:52:16 Emily: Fuckin' finally!

0:52:16 Ally: Finally, it happened!

0:52:18 Emily: This is Battle Bots, baby!

0:52:20 Siobhan: Push that robot over! [laughter]

0:52:23 Brennan: Jesus Christ! You see that, you are there fighting, this thing goes to hit you, you roll on your back, do that full breakdancing, capoeira legs around move, and its fist, woo, bam! And cracks the glass shield of its friend over here.

0:52:35 Emily: Does that mean I could rush in there and attack the vampire?

0:52:38 Brennan: No.

0:52:39 Emily: Damn!

0:52:40 Ally: Oh, we gotta keep track of which one has the concentration spell on your ex.

0:52:45 Lou: Yeah, I know which one.

0:52:46 Ally: It's the one on the right, right?

0:52:47 Lou: Yeah.

0:52:48 Ally: Oh left, sorry.

0:52:49 Siobhan: The furthest one on the left.

0:52:50 Ally: Yeah.

0:52:51 Emily: Oh, so furthest one on the left? The one that I just made attack someone else?

0:52:53 Lou: The one you just made—

0:52:55 Siobhan: Get attacked.

0:52:55 Lou: Get attacked, the one who's cracked.

0:52:57 Brennan: Kingston, that's gonna be you.

0:52:58 Lou: All right. In the spirit of Pete, can I, do I, can I roll Insight to see if I think that these mech vampires would be susceptible to Command?

0:53:12 Brennan: Roll either Arcana or Religion.

0:53:15 Lou: All right, let's go, ah. They're the same. It's 10.

0:53:22 Brennan: You're not sure, you know for sure that Moses is not, you could go either way on the vampires.

0:53:27 Lou: All right, I'mma try it. I'll cast a second level Command spell on these two, the two around Sofia.

0:53:33 Brennan: Cool. What is the command you were issuing forth to them?

0:53:39 Lou: Smash, and I point at the pillars underneath Robert Moses.

0:53:42 Brennan: Okay. One of them resists, the other reaches deep down and burns through more of that willpower.

0:53:59 Lou: What the fuck is this willpower?

0:54:02 Emily: Hmm.

0:54:03 Siobhan: Yeah, I don't like it.

0:54:05 Brennan: Cool. That's your Command. Any movement that round, or no?

0:54:11 Lou: Can I snake through here?

0:54:13 Brennan: Yeah, absolutely.

0:54:14 Lou: Yeah, six?

0:54:15 Brennan: Yep. One, two, three--

0:54:17 Emily: Someone go kick the blood around.

0:54:19 Lou: Five, six.

0:54:20 Brennan: Cool. Kingston, you see Robert looks at you as you approach looking down from the balcony, he's got Kugrash around him, and you see he says, looks at you, the room grows dark, he says,

0:54:38 Robert: As a favor, to a friend and someone I respect: Who do you want me to drop? Your friend, the eagle? Or the kid? One of 'em's gotta go.

0:55:00 Lou: Can I stay silent?

0:55:02 Brennan: You can stay silent, he says,

0:55:03 Robert: Tick tock, tick tock. [whispers] [pointing back and forth between Kugrash and Pete] Eenie, meenie, minie, moe, catch a tiger by the toe, if he hollers, let him go, mama says to pick the very best one, and you are it. Robert’s finger lands on Pete.

0:55:15 Brennan: [imitates magical blast] A spell releases from his fingers.

0:55:19 Ally: Uh -  Shield.

0:55:22 Brennan: Pete. This spell that he is casting is a ninth level spell.

0:55:26 Ally: [faux confident] Mm-hmm. And Shield is a cantrip. The group laughs.

0:55:30 Brennan: And this spell does not have a saving throw. This is Power Word Kill. It doesn't have a saving throw. The only thing the spell cares about is how many hit points you've got. Do you currently have less than 100 hit points? Ally nods grimly.

0:55:48 Brennan: You watch Pete's life leave his body as he falls to the ground, dead. [imitates thud]

0:55:57 Zac: Do you have—

0:55:58 Lou: I have Revivify.

0:55:59 Ally: What the fuck!?

0:56:02 Emily: Is it, like, dead? Or —

0:56:04 Ally: Death saving throws, or like—

0:56:06 Brennan: No saving throws, fully dead, right now.

0:56:13 Siobhan: [whispers] Fuck! [imitates magical explosion]

0:56:17 Brennan: He--

0:56:18 Ally: I just got sober! The group laughs.

0:56:20 Ally: Do you know how much weight was just lifted from my fucking shoulders?

0:56:26 Brennan: [laughs] That is, yeah, Power Word Kill. You guys all watch Pete drop to the ground.

0:56:35 Murph: [whispers] Fucking fuck. [normal voice, to Lou] You probably don't have another fifth level spell.

0:56:39 Kingston: I don't. But Revivify's a third level spell.

0:56:43 Murph: Oh, okay, whew! [Lou laughs]

0:56:45 Siobhan: Let me at him.

0:56:46 Murph: [whispers] Fucker.

0:56:48 Lou: “Power Word Kill”?

0:56:50 Brennan: Power Word Kill. Robert looks up and goes,

0:57:01 Robert: I am purified of my undeath, and thus the realms beyond cannot claim me.

0:57:07 Brennan: And the water of the Fountain of Bethesda sprinkles from his hand, falls to the floor. Rowan, that's gonna be your turn.

0:57:17 Siobhan: Am I within 30 feet of, can I get within five feet of Sofia?

0:57:22 Brennan: You—

0:57:23 Emily: Yeah!

0:57:24 Brennan: Can get within five feet.

0:57:24 Siobhan: Yes, right?

0:57:25 Brennan: Yep, absolutely.

0:57:26 Siobhan: Okay, so what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna get within five feet of Sofia, and I'm gonna say,

0:57:31 Misty: Want to take a trip?

0:57:34 Sophia: Yeah!

0:57:35 Siobhan: And then I'm gonna cast Dimension Door so that we cast above his Globe of—

0:57:39 All: Woo! [applause]

0:57:41 Siobhan: And so we fall on top of him and hopefully do some falling damage as we do that.

0:57:48 Brennan: Incredible!

0:57:49 Emily: Woo!

0:57:49 Ally: Fuck yeah!

0:57:51 Brennan: Cool.

0:57:52 Ally: Those Louboutins are heavy.

0:57:53 Siobhan: Those are sharp.

0:57:54 Emily: Can I hold Misty's body so that I absorb all the impact of the landing, 'cause I have Slow Fall.

0:58:02 Brennan: Give me just an Athletics check, low DC, just to hold on to Misty while you fall.

0:58:05 Emily: Okay.

0:58:05 Siobhan: Sick.

0:58:07 Emily: 12.

0:58:08 Brennan: Cool, you do it. You grab Rowan around the waist, and slide to the ground.

0:58:12 Emily: As I'm falling, I'm like,

0:58:14 Sofia: If only Pete could see this! Actually, maybe it's better he can't see this!

0:58:22 Brennan: You Dimension Door. Boom, you appear.

0:58:25 Murph: Fuck yeah!

0:58:26 Brennan: You guys fall to the ground here as you're Slow Falling, you don't deal any damage, but you don't take any damage either.

0:58:30 Siobhan: Okay, great. That's fine.

0:58:34 Brennan: Cool. At the end of your turn, I'm going to need Kugrash, Sofia, and Rowan to all give me Constitution saving throws.

0:58:48 Siobhan: Okay, can I also before I, 'cause I have not done a bonus action yet.

0:58:51 Brennan: Oh yeah, go for it, yeah, yeah, yeah.

0:58:52 Siobhan: I would like to… Turn to Sofia and be like,

0:58:57 Rowan: Hey, thanks.

0:59:01 Sofia: My God! Anytime!

0:59:03 Siobhan: Cute and flir, and now—

0:59:03 Sofia: Misty Moore who, this is my new hero! [laughter]

0:59:07 Siobhan: Now you have Bardic Inspiration. So it's a Constitution saving throw?

0:59:11 Brennan: Constitution saving throw, that's correct.

0:59:13 Ally: Who has Bardic now?

0:59:14 Emily: I do. Constitution saving throw, is this an area effect, or fearing, or charming?

0:59:20 Brennan: Your Evasion only is for Dexterity saving throws.

0:59:23 Emily: No, but I have Stillness of Mind, so I can't be charmed or frightened.

0:59:25 Brennan: This is not a charm or a fright.

0:59:27 Emily: Okay.

0:59:28 Siobhan: I got a 7.

0:59:29 Brennan: 7?

0:59:30 Siobhan: In Constitution, I got a 15.

0:59:31 Brennan: 15.

0:59:33 Emily: I got a 15 as well.

0:59:36 Brennan: 15 as well.

0:59:37 Emily: Should I use the Bardic Inspiration for that? I'm gonna use the Bardic Inspiration for that.

0:59:40 Emily: Cool. I got an 18.

0:59:44 Brennan: You got an 18 for the Bardic Inspiration? Okay. Rowan and Kugrash, you take 11, 15, 17, 22 points of damage each, you take 11 points of damage. You see Robert just goes,

1:00:00 Robert: [shouting] I'm starting to lose my patience! [imitates whooshing]

1:00:04 Brennan: And just the power of raw death surrounds him, and fluttering, ashy scraps of dollar bills, [imitates fluttering] flutter around him. After this damage, I'm gonna need Constitution checks from Kug and from Rowan.

1:00:18 Siobhan: Again?

1:00:18 Murph: God, oh wait. So I got 14.

1:00:24 Brennan: So you got a 14.

1:00:25 Murph: So what was that, half of--

1:00:26 Brennan: You're only trying to beat an 11.

1:00:28 Murph: Okay, cool.

1:00:29 Siobhan: Oh, I got an 11.

1:00:30 Brennan: You got an 11, you succeed.

1:00:31 Siobhan: Okay.

1:00:31 Brennan: You pass. I'm also gonna need another one for the conjured rats as well.

1:00:37 Murph: Oh shit. Are they—

1:00:39 Brennan: There's some left, but so go ahead and give me that.

1:00:42 Murph: Oh, just to keep—

1:00:43 Brennan: For concentration, yeah.

1:00:44 Siobhan: Oh, concentration.

1:00:45 Murph: They're gone.

1:00:46 Siobhan: Oh, I think I have, oh, I have advantage on that anyway. That's worse, well. Anyway.

1:00:52 Brennan: You just barely—

1:00:53 Siobhan: I succeeded it, so it doesn't matter.

1:00:54 Brennan: So you guys hold on to your spells, the rats, phew, scatter and vanish. That's Robert's turn. These guys are gonna go. One, two...

1:01:10 Kingston: Ricky, are you okay? [laughs]

1:01:12 Ricky: I'm having a horrible time.

1:01:14 Kugrash: Yeah.

1:01:15 Brennan: [Brennan] One, two, three, four, five, six.

1:01:16 Emily: We’re getting so fucked.

1:01:17 Murph: Ricky's next to some fire, watching his friend be killed, being held up against a wall.

1:01:24 Zac: Awful!

1:01:24 Murph: By a stronger person.

1:01:26 Emily: So he's kind of standing in the blood, they're tracking the blood around, that's not having any effect?

1:01:30 Brennan: Doesn't seem to be having any effect.

1:01:31 Zac: All right.

1:01:33 Ally: I was gonna slide into the blood as a whole action.

1:01:35 Emily: I was gonna Slip n' Slide.

1:01:37 Brennan: Cool. That is going, that was Rowan, that's that. Ricky, that's gonna be you.

1:01:44 Zac: He is out of the thing now, right?

1:01:47 Brennan: Who's out of the thing?

1:01:49 Zac: He's opened the hatch to bite me, right?

1:01:51 Brennan: Yes he has.

1:01:52 Zac: Oh God. I guess, I don't have any of the information for Suggestion in front of me, but that is a Wisdom saving throw, right?

1:02:02 Brennan: Correct, yes.

1:02:03 Zac: And from what we know, they probably can save themselves from Wisdom saving throws, is what it seems— Brennan shrugs noncommittally.

1:02:08 Siobhan: Yeah, maybe, probably.

1:02:09 Emily: Is the Wisdom what the willpower helps them resist?

1:02:13 Ally: I don't know.

1:02:14 Lou: This was a Wisdom saving throw that they pulled deep down inside of themselves and—

1:02:19 Emily: Yeah, both of yours was the shutdown.

1:02:22 Lou: Shutdown wasn't a Wisdom, that was Con.

1:02:24 Emily: Okay, so maybe it was just saving throws.

1:02:27 Zac: Well, okay.

1:02:30 Emily: But that was a limited resource.

1:02:32 Lou: Yeah.

1:02:37 Zac: I want… [laughs] Ox is too far away from any of them to attack right now, right?

1:02:44 Brennan: I think so, yeah.

1:02:45 Zac: I guess Ox will, I want, [laughs] because the hatch is open, I want Ox to run in and jump up and attack the vampire.

1:02:52 Brennan: Go for it! Have him attack.

1:02:54 Emily: Aw, so cute! Like going through a doggy door.

1:02:56 Ally: Wait, those fire hasn't been going.

1:02:57 Murph: He's gone.

1:02:58 Ally: Oh, okay.

1:02:59 Murph: He's been fighting the guy that Ricky—

1:03:01 Zac: So that will be… What am I adding to this? Oh, that's a 15.

1:03:09 Brennan: 15 misses.

1:03:10 Zac: Okay. I'm gonna… Jesus, this sucks. There's no, I guess I'll… I'm gonna cast Suggestion on him, and tell him to throw me at Robert. [laughs]

1:03:29 Brennan: Okay! He's going to make a Wisdom save.

1:03:37 Zac: Yeah.

1:03:38 Emily: I love that.

1:03:40 Brennan: He succeeds on the Wisdom save.

1:03:41 Emily: Aww.

1:03:42 Brennan: Brutal.

1:03:42 Zac: Okay.

1:03:43 Emily: Brennan, it'd be so fun if he did it, though!

1:03:45 Lou: Wasn't it fun with Sondheim? I thought you let that happen.

1:03:49 Siobhan: Daddy please, please let us stay up late!

1:03:52 Lou: Come on, Daddy! [laughter]

1:03:53 Zac: This is terrible.

1:03:55 Brennan: Sorry! I'm so sorry. That's going to be, yeah, Ricky's not looking great, all the way back over there. Objects are gonna go?

1:04:12 Siobhan: Yeah.

1:04:13 Brennan: Mm-hmm.

1:04:15 Siobhan: So. For the umbrella, I would like for it to take, so it's over here.

1:04:22 Brennan: Yes.

1:04:23 Siobhan: I'd like for it to take a dash action towards, let me know if you'll let me do this.

1:04:26 Brennan: Sure.

1:04:27 Siobhan: A dash action towards the one holding Ricky.

1:04:29 Brennan: Cool.

1:04:30 Siobhan: And then open.

1:04:32 Brennan: Okay!

1:04:32 Siobhan: So it's in the way of everything.

1:04:35 Brennan: Cool!

1:04:36 Siobhan: It's just like a, he can't see properly, and he can't get to his buttons.

1:04:41 Brennan: Trying to fuck up his shit, cool.

1:04:42 Siobhan: Right. He can't attack, but—

1:04:43 Emily: Obscuring his view of the field.

1:04:45 Ally: That's cute.

1:04:45 Brennan: Cool, it goes, it pops open. Great.

1:04:48 Zac: His what?

1:04:49 Siobhan: It—

1:04:50 Ally: I would imagine you would get advantage now, or he gets—

1:04:52 Brennan: The umbrella opens up, cool. That's not gonna have a numerical effect this turn, but it can help, it can create disadvantage on the attacks for that thing, yeah.

1:05:02 Siobhan: And then I'll have one kiosk, can the closer kiosk get to Ricky?

1:05:09 Brennan: The closer kiosk can get to Ricky, I believe, right?

1:05:12 Siobhan: Great.

1:05:14 Lou: Which two are they? That's the real question.

1:05:17 Zac: Am I over here?

1:05:18 Siobhan: I'll have that one attack--

1:05:21 Brennan: One, two, three, four, yep. That one can get there, boom.

1:05:24 Siobhan: And then the other one go forward and attack this guy in the corner right here--

1:05:28 Brennan: This one right here?

1:05:29 Siobhan: That's within 30, right?

1:05:29 Brennan: Yeah.

1:05:29 Siobhan: Yeah.

1:05:34 Brennan: Cool, go ahead and roll—

1:05:35 Siobhan: Purple is close to me, and pink is far.

1:05:38 Brennan: Cool.

1:05:40 Siobhan: Well, fuck me. The 12 is not gonna hit, right?

1:05:47 Brennan: A 12 is not going to hit, no.

1:05:50 Siobhan: Well, nothing hits. But at least they're there. At least they're there!

1:05:55 Emily: [laughs] That's the story of this fight, is like, I don't know.

1:05:59 Lou: We're there.

1:06:00 Ally: Oh.

1:06:01 Emily: At least.

1:06:02 Lou: They're great at running defense.

1:06:04 Brennan: You see they actually, yes, these three vampires all rise up on these little risers to surround you guys up on the dais.

1:06:18 Siobhan: Oh no! Oh, I don't like this at all!

1:06:21 Lou: This just got wild!

1:06:22 Murph: Are they—

1:06:23 Emily: This is awful.

1:06:25 Brennan: Cool. That is— One of the kiosk mech minis is kind of crooked on its stand.

1:06:27 Siobhan: So he's falling, he's going, he's gone.

1:06:29 Lou: Fall, fall, fall!

1:06:31 Emily: Fall, you asshole!

1:06:32 Lou: Yeah, shatter, if a mini shatters, we can't fight it!

1:06:35 Siobhan: Yeah, that's the rules, it's in the DM's guide, I read it.

1:06:37 Lou: It's in the DM's guide. [laughs]

1:06:38 Siobhan: Not even the player’s manual—

1:06:39 Lou: It's not a homebrew from some 12 year old. That's Wizards of the Coast.

1:06:44 Brennan: We're back up at Kugrash, at the top!

1:06:46 Murph: Sweet. Cool. I'm gonna have fire elemental is gonna go after this guy that's got Ricky, it has Fire Form, so it can squeeze through a space one inch wide.

1:07:01 Brennan: Cool.

1:07:01 Murph: So I want him to get in the cockpit with the dude.

1:07:03 Brennan: Hell yeah, go for it.

1:07:04 Murph: And once he gets within five feet of him, like an actual person, it takes 1d10 fire damage, just right off the bat.

1:07:13 Brennan: Hell yeah, go for it!

1:07:14 Murph: So he'll take 8 damage.

1:07:17 Brennan: He'll take 8 damage. Dope.

1:07:20 Murph: And then it'll make its attacks. And I think it might, fire damage and catches fire. It catches fire until someone takes an action to douse the fire, the creature takes 1d10 fire damage at the start of each of its turns.

1:07:34 Emily: Oh, cool.

1:07:35 Brennan: Cool, awesome.

1:07:35 Zac: Each of its turns? It has multiple turns, right?

1:07:38 Murph: No, though, he's using legendary actions I think. Okay. So two attacks. One of 'em is a 24 to hit.

1:07:45 Brennan: 24 hits.

1:07:46 Murph: Sweet. That's going to be 16 damage.

1:07:53 Ally: Fuck yeah.

1:07:54 Murph: Oh no, sorry, 13 damage.

1:07:58 Brennan: This vampire's looking fucked up over here, the one that's fighting Ricky. Cool, that's your turn, Kugrash. And then what's Kugrash do, oh, that's your elemental?

1:08:07 Murph: Yeah, okay. Then my elemental, I imagine I'm about to get severely fucked up. I am going to, all right. I think Ricky can get rid of that guy. Here is what I'm going to do, I'm going to fly away, I'm gonna use my movement to get out of there.

1:08:26 Brennan: He's gonna go ahead and take a swipe at you as you do that.

1:08:30 Murph: Hmm, okay.

1:08:31 Emily: Can't you just disengage?

1:08:33 Murph: No, I don't want to disengage, I want to do something.

1:08:35 Lou: He's got plans!

1:08:37 Brennan: Does a 20 hit Kugrash?

1:08:40 Murph: Yes.

1:08:41 Brennan: Okay.

1:08:42 Siobhan: Well that, I can use Cutting Words against.

1:08:44 Brennan: Okay, yes.

1:08:45 Murph: That’d be wonderful.

1:08:45 Siobhan: Because he's right next to me.

1:08:47 Brennan: He's right next to you. Kugrash's AC is an eagle, what is your AC in eagle form?

1:08:53 Murph: 13.

1:08:54 Brennan: 13.

1:08:55 Siobhan: Okay, fuck, so I've got to get a 7 or an 8?

1:08:56 Brennan: You need, no, you need an 8. You need to get it all the way to 12.

1:09:00 Siobhan: Well. That is a 1.

1:09:02 Ally: Aww! [shouting] This fucking game!

1:09:06 Brennan: You—

1:09:07 Emily: We are getting so fucked!

1:09:09 Lou: Fuckin' game! No, not yet. Kind of. Kind of fucked.

1:09:13 Brennan: You take 13 points of cold damage.

1:09:16 Murph: Okay.

1:09:18 Brennan: You take 13 points of cold damage.

1:09:19 Murph: Okay, I snap out of being an eagle, and I am Kugrash again.

1:09:23 Brennan: Ooh, let's get little Kug out there. I'm gonna need you to make a Constitution saving throw.

1:09:27 Murph: Okay. Goddammit. Huge fail, 1 and a 2.

1:09:35 Brennan: You see that as you go to fly away, you see that Robert goes,

1:09:39 Robert: Not so quick, little bird.

1:09:40 Brennan: Gah, and grabs your neck and says,

1:09:43 Robert: Why don't you just relax?

1:09:45 Brennan: Snap! [normal voice] And you, your windpipe is crushed, you are paralyzed on the ground. You are fully paralyzed and cannot move or take actions. That is going to be—

1:09:59 Siobhan: Oh no!

1:10:00 Lou: That was the most visceral description of—

1:10:02 Siobhan: So fucked up!

1:10:03 Lou: That was too real! [laughs]

1:10:05 Brennan: This is Robert fuckin' Moses, baby!

1:10:07 Ally: An eagle's neck is worth two hands at least! Eagles are large.

1:10:11 Lou: Yeah, don't do one fuckin'-- Ugh! Oh, that’s chills.

1:10:15 Brennan: That's going to be, you are paralyzed, Kug.

1:10:22 Lou and Emily: Oh my God.

1:10:24 Lou: Wail on this fool. [laughs]

1:10:25 Brennan: That's now going to be the vampires.

1:10:27 Emily: I want to but I'm rolling like shit.

1:10:29 Ally: Did the elemental go away?

1:10:30 Emily: I have to hit before I can wail.

1:10:33 Brennan: You see that this vampire right here is gonna make an attack, actually no, this one's gonna make a shove attempt, so this is Athletics versus Athletics.

1:10:51 Emily: On me?

1:10:52 Brennan: On you, yes.

1:10:53 Emily: All right.

1:10:56 Brennan: So Athletics versus Athletics, he rolled a nat 1.

1:11:02 Emily: I rolled an 18.

1:11:03 Brennan: You succeed, the other one's gonna try to throw you off the platform as well. This one, you have to beat a 12 on an Athletics check.

1:11:12 Emily: I did.

1:11:13 Brennan: Whoom, whoom, these two claws come at you. Also, you see that these two heal fully.

1:11:24 Murph: We gotta do, fuck. We gotta do radiant damage.

1:11:26 Brennan: This guy also heals, not all the way, but heals a little bit.

1:11:31 Zac: Can we tell if the damage on their suits and them are separate things?

1:11:36 Brennan: They are not separate. They appear, it appears, you see that they have IVs of blood running through the machines into their bodies. That's going to be, so that's, they both miss there. This one is also going to now move over here, and is gonna take another swing, try to knock Sofia off.

1:11:57 Emily: Oh, they—

1:11:59 Brennan: Now you're gonna need to beat—

1:12:00 Emily: Wait a second, oh, these aren't actually attacking me. So I can’t redirect—

1:12:03 Brennan: They're not actually attacking you.

1:12:04 Emily: Oh, so you're being smart, okay.

1:12:06 Siobhan: Oh, I see, you're being a clever person. Brennan waggles his finger.

1:12:09 Emily: So what do I have to beat?

1:12:09 Siobhan: Great.

1:12:10 Brennan: Now you gotta beat a 27 on an Athletics check.

1:12:16 Murph: I think we all lose, we all lose, actually, I'm not incapacitated, right? I'm just paralyzed?

1:12:20 Brennan: Paralyzed, yep.

1:12:21 Murph: Okay, so my aura's still there, but we're gonna lose it if I go out.

1:12:26 Emily: I didn't.

1:12:27 Brennan: This one, boom, and throws you to the ground, boom, prone at the bottom of the—

1:12:32 Emily: Guess what, bitch, I fuckin' jump right up when I'm prone!

1:12:36 Brennan: [laughs] That's right! Drunken Master!

1:12:38 Emily: Yeah, Drunken Master! [claps]

1:12:40 Ally: You do like a, [grunts and pretends to jump up]

1:12:42 Emily: I take a little nip of Smirnoff, [gasps] I’m back up.

1:12:45 Brennan: That's them. That vampire's gonna take an attack on Ricky over there, and he's actually going to miss.

1:12:51 Zac: But doesn't he take damage from the fire?

1:12:53 Brennan: At the beginning of his turn, yeah.

1:12:54 Murph: I would think that, oh, he is still on fire, yes.

1:12:56 Brennan: This is actually his turn, yeah.

1:12:58 Murph: Okay. 5 damage.

1:13:00 Brennan: [softly] Ooh!

1:13:02 Lou: Namma, namma.

1:13:04 Zac: How fucked up is he looking?

1:13:08 Brennan: Oh that, how fucked up is he, he's looking messed up, he's looking fucked up.

1:13:12 Zac: I might just try to kill him.

1:13:14 Brennan: That is going to be Sofia.

1:13:17 Emily: Okay. Do you guys think that we should be going after Robert Moses or should I be trying to, my instinct is just to go after Robert Moses.

1:13:24 Siobhan: Yeah.

1:13:24 Lou: I feel like he is at the heart of whatever--

1:13:26 Siobhan: Don't worry about the vampires.

1:13:26 Lou: The ticker tack thing is.

1:13:28 Emily: Yeah. All right, I'm going to use a, can I use my dodge now so that if I jump up, then they can't get--

1:13:39 Brennan: They get disadvantage?

1:13:40 Emily: They can't, oh wait, that would be disadvantage?

1:13:41 Brennan: Dodge is disadvantage, disengage is no attacks of opportunity.

1:13:44 Emily: I'll take, well, since I'm doing Flurry of Blows, if I were to do Flurry of Blows, can I take my disengage before I do my Flurry of Blows? 'Cause I get it at the end of every—

1:13:52 Brennan: Yeah, you can spend a ki point do your Flurry of Blows and get no attacks of opportunity.

1:13:55 Emily: Cool, that's what I'm gonna do, I'm gonna do that, jump up, and go after Robert Moses.

1:13:59 Brennan: Jesus. So all of them go to swing, you miss, Drunken Master twirl through the air, no need for a jump check, you pop straight out, it's only like what, a 20 foot straight high jump?

1:14:08 Siobhan: Easy!

1:14:09 Emily: And I'm going after Robert Moses. First attack is a nat 20! [cheering, applause]

1:14:15 Ally: [clapping] That's what we need!

1:14:17 Emily: I would also like to point out to Robert Moses that,

1:14:19 Sofia: When you hit me back there, I don't know, something about it jostled something up, and I'm looking pretty radiant, wouldn't you say?

1:14:26 Emily: I should be doing some radiant damage.

1:14:28 Brennan: Are you, you're less than half?

1:14:29 Emily: Yeah.

1:14:30 Brennan: Oh wow! Fuck!

1:14:32 Emily: Okay, so I'm gonna first thing will be—

1:14:33 Ally: What does crit do? Damage and a half?

1:14:35 Murph: All the roll, doubles every die.

1:14:37 Ally: Oh doubles, that's—

1:14:38 Siobhan: You would roll double the amount of dice.

1:14:41 Ally: That's so sick.

1:14:41 Emily: 16 plus, so it was 21 for my first hit.

1:14:45 Brennan: [whispering] Jesus.

1:14:46 Emily: I'm going again. I'm guessing a 13 does not hit?

1:14:51 Brennan: No, it does not.

1:14:52 Emily: Okay. Going again. That does not hit. Going again! Does a 20 hit?

1:14:59 Brennan: A 20 does hit.

1:15:01 Emily: Okay. So I hit him for another 12.

1:15:08 Brennan: Woo! You leap up, he has just like, broken Kugrash's windpipe, he's come in, killed Pete, you go up and he says,

1:15:18 Robert: Miss Lee, let's not have the entire Lee family die at my request, what do you say?

1:15:25 Sophia: There's literally only one Lee that I fucking care about. Wait, no Lee. Lee's my husband. [shouts] Jesus fuckin' Christ, now I know what you're going after! Fuck you!

1:15:37 Brennan: You, [imitates multiple impacts] and you feel his fuckin' lich skull crack under your raining blows. Bdah, bdah, bdah! This guy is very powerful, but he is a spellcaster. You gotta leave a fuckin' sick crack across his skull, wailing on him, as he skids back across the balcony.

1:15:55 Emily: Some of that was radiant damage.

1:15:56 Brennan: Absolutely, yeah. The radiant damage fucks him up for sure.

1:16:00 Ally: Nice.

1:16:00 Brennan: That is Sofia's turn.This guy's gonna take another swing. You take 8 points of damage, Ricky. And that is going to be Pete.

1:16:18 Ally: I mean, am I in Nod, what am I seeing?

1:16:21 Brennan: You float into Nod, and you hear the noise of people watching a show. And you look over, you're in a weird, red light district of Nod you haven't been at before, and you hear someone say,

1:16:42 Someone: [gravelly] Welcome to the stage, Bubbles, our next dancer!

1:16:47 Brennan: [normal voice] And you see there's a bunch of weird dream beings that all kind of look nonplussed, and like they find this distasteful. And you see a bunch of copies of your dad dressed in bubbles come out and start erotically dancing with each other on stage.

1:16:54 Siobhan: Oh no.

1:17:01 Ally: Fuck no. I sprint as fast as I can to wherever the Golden Door was, to see what it looks like in Nod.

1:17:10 Brennan: You start rushing to the Golden Door, you hear a voice behind you go,

1:17:13 Mitch Conlan: Pete, Pete!

1:17:15 Pete: What?

1:17:16 Brennan: And you see your dad calls your name after you.

1:17:20 Pete: Ahh, those, yeah, that's my name, yeah, that is who I am!

1:17:24 Brennan: You see that all of his clones run off the stage as people start going,

1:17:26 Crowd: Boo, keep dancing!

1:17:29 Brennan: And there's five of your dad just there,

1:17:32 Mitch: [heavy breathing] What's going on, what, what happened to me?

1:17:37 Pete: I may, I am magic and I had a surge, and I don't know what I did to you, but I did send you maybe to hell, I don't know.

1:17:50 Mitch: I don't know if it's hell. I honestly don't know if it's hell here.

1:17:53 Pete: This, oh, I sent you here, that's nice. It's Nod. I think I'm dead right now, actually.

1:17:59 Mitch: Okay. I've figured out a lot of stuff since I've been here.

1:18:04 Pete: Okay.

1:18:05 Mitch: I had a very narrow view of what the world was.

1:18:08 Pete: Yeah.

1:18:09 Mitch: I saw a snake fuck its own asshole with its head.

1:18:12 Pete: Cool, was it... consensual? [laughs]

1:18:15 Mitch: It was doing it to itself, I think it was masturbation.

1:18:17 Pete: I'm just—

1:18:18 Mitch: My point is this, I had a very narrow minded view and… The bubbles talk to me!

1:18:24 Pete: Cool.

1:18:27 Mitch: Do I live here forever now?

1:18:28 Pete: I'm not sure, man--

1:18:29 Mitch: I think Mom and your brother and sister at some point, should know that I'm here.

1:18:34 Pete: Yeah, yeah. But I'm dead too, unfortunately, I wish. What have you learned, do you know anything that could help me revive?

1:18:44 Mitch: I was wrong about my prostate. Your mother talked to me about it a lot of times, it's great.

1:18:50 Pete: Yeah, that's a lot of men, they find it too late. They all say that—

1:18:53 Mitch: I missed years and years and years, it's really incredible.

1:18:56 Pete: Yeah, eating ass has had a comeback, so luckily people our generation are cool with it, but there's just a lost gener-, anyway, we got, I don't, we shouldn't talk about this! Can you please help me in any way?

1:19:06 Mitch: There's a panda in a full clown costume--

1:19:08 Ally: Can I cast Commune With City to get answers?

1:19:11 Brennan: Yes. He's running after you. You just see that your dad basically has not been in hell, but has basically just been in a mind-bending phantasmagoria for the past three weeks that he's been here.

1:19:23 Ally: Whoa.

1:19:24 Brennan: And has been like, you don't know if, he hasn't had a redemption. It's just that his whole mind is fuckin' unraveled, and there's hope for something? But also, you don't know if he's learned anything, he's just literally been on—

1:19:37 Ally: He totally has, he called me Pete.

1:19:39 Brennan: He calls you Pete, yeah! He, you think that that is a result that something about your trip that you sent him here on means that his, the weird, horrifying, conservative things he had about what can and cannot happen, it's like, hey man. You saw a wind serpent from an ancient, long-gone religion, you know, fellate a B-list 70’s celebrity in a spinning donut going down the street. Is it really that weird to change your name? Is that really the weirdest fucking thing that you could do?

1:20:15 Ally: Great, I send my dad to Amsterdam. [laughter]

1:20:19 Brennan: He runs with you down the street, but there's about five of him as he runs. You look and see, in front of the Golden Door, that sigil in blood appearing and start to move into the position that a knob would have.

1:20:35 Ally: Can I, once a day I can cast Dispel Magic, in fourth level or higher, has to make a saving roll?

1:20:40 Brennan: I'm gonna say that because this is happening in a single round of combat, your Commune With City is how you get here and find this. But you, boom, arrive there, your dad says,

1:20:47 Mitch: What am I lookin' at, Pete?

1:20:50 Pete: So, there's too much to explain. Bad guy trying to get through this door.

1:20:55 Mitch: Got it, all right. Well, I can suck and fuck with the best of 'em, so—

1:21:00 Pete: Great! You, are you okay?

1:21:03 Mitch: [shouting] Yes!

1:21:04 Pete: Okay.

1:21:05 Mitch: [shouting, pained] I am doing great now!

1:21:07 Pete: Let's take a breath and let's say nothing sexual for a while. Let's just take a breather!

1:21:11 Mitch: Cool!

1:21:12 Pete: Feel our body on our own.

1:21:13 Mitch: Yep.

1:21:13 Pete: Great.

1:21:14 Mitch: I've done all the drugs that there are. I was wrong about that, too.

1:21:16 Pete: Cool, I'm actually sober now. Yeah, great.

1:21:19 Mitch: Hey, good, congrats!

1:21:20 Ally: We hug. [laughs]

1:21:21 Brennan: Yeah, big hug. Pats you on the back.

1:21:23 Ally: We hug for the first time in decades.

1:21:23 Mitch: Yeah, yeah! I love, there's a lot about myself that I like that I didn't say yes to.

1:21:28 Pete: Yeah. Totally.

1:21:30 Brennan: You see that, we snap out of the dream realm as you hug.

1:21:33 Ally: [laughs] Goddamn it, what the fuck.

1:21:34 Brennan: All your dad's weird dream clones as he kind of screeches and twitches. And we cut back, Kingston, it is your turn.

1:21:41 Lou: So is Pete dying?

1:21:42 Brennan: No, no, Pete is full dead.

1:21:44 Lou: Pete is full dead.

1:21:45 Brennan: Full dead.

1:21:46 Lou: Great, I cast, can I cast Revivify?

1:21:49 Brennan: You call in some very powerful magic. As Robert's surrounded and fighting, he looks down at you casting this Revivify spell, what is it, this is resurrection. What is Kingston doing this moment, you look down at Pete.

1:22:03 Lou: I put both my hands on his stomach, and I say,

1:22:10 Kingston: You're not done yet, kid. Come on. We got work to do.

1:22:14 Brennan: Boom! [sound of explosion] You are, whoom! Sucked out of the dream realm, back into your body.

1:22:18 Pete: Ah, dad! [laughter]

1:22:20 Kingston: What, me? I'm, you call me—

1:22:23 Pete: No, I'm sorry. I was just with my dad.

1:22:25 Kingston: [laughs] Yeah, that's fine. Ooh, that's crazy. Anyway. We're still in it, Pete.

1:22:33 Ally: I'm hugging you.

1:22:35 Brennan: Yeah, you see that, pew! As you bring the Vox Phantasma back, something broken in the magic of New York that has been broken for some time is healed forever. The dreaming and the waking intertwine and Pete is, [imitates whooshing] brought back by your magic, boom! And you know what this spell is trying to do. That's--

1:23:00 Ally: Oh, can I Mind Link with everyone and let them know what I just heard? Now we all know?

1:23:02 Brennan: Yeah, go ahead, what are you gonna tell 'em?

1:23:05 Ally: [laughs] What am I gonna tell them?

1:23:07 Brennan: Your words, yeah, what do you say?

1:23:10 Ally: I'm not even quite sure what I just saw. It was like, whatever blood is happening here is happening at the door of inside Nod.

1:23:17 Murph: So this is the lock, or this is the—

1:23:19 Ally: Yeah, this is probably him creating the lock here that will end up there.

1:23:23 Zac: We gotta find the key.

1:23:23 Brennan: Kingston, do you do anything else?

1:23:26 Lou: Can I move, I'll move to, I'll stand right on the edge of the thing.

1:23:30 Brennan: Cool.

1:23:31 Ally: Unless he's creating the lock and he already has the key and he is just gonna open it all in one move, yeah.

1:23:37 Lou: Also, you have 1 hit point.

1:23:39 Ally: Oh, really. Dope.

1:23:42 Emily: Oh, we should get you healed. Anyone else have heals? You're paralyzed.

1:23:46 Siobhan: I mean, I'm up on this platform and I don't know if I can do spells.

1:23:49 Brennan: Cool.

1:23:49 Emily: Yeah.

1:23:50 Siobhan: Probably not, right?

1:23:50 Brennan: It gets to be Robert's turn again. [sighs]

1:23:57 Ally: Of course. I'm up, bitch!

1:24:01 Brennan: Sofia, do you have less than 150 hit points?

1:24:05 Emily: I do. [ominous music]

1:24:07 Siobhan: No!

1:24:08 Brennan: You see Robert gets, whoom! And he goes,

1:24:10 Robert: Mean left hook, kid! Let me give it a shot! [punches her]

1:24:13 Brennan: Wham! [normal voice] And you are stunned with Power Word Stun. Automatically you can make saves at the end of your turns, but you are fully stunned.

1:24:23 Emily: [whispers] Oh!

1:24:25 Brennan: Rowan, that is going to be your turn.

1:24:28 Siobhan: So within his Globe of whatever, I can't cast spells?

1:24:32 Brennan: Actually—

1:24:33 Siobhan: Or can I cast spells on the--

1:24:34 Brennan: You're in the bubble now, so you're with—

1:24:36 Siobhan: So within the bubble, I can do it.

1:24:39 Brennan: That is correct. Yeah, you are past the 10 foot barrier.

1:24:44 Siobhan: Sick. Then I would like for, I would like to cast Puppet on him.

1:24:54 Brennan: Cool.

1:24:55 Siobhan: So it's a Constitution saving throw, and on a failed save, he has to move where I tell him to and drop what he's holding.

1:25:04 Brennan: Gotcha. He fails the save.

1:25:10 Siobhan: [whispering] Fuck yes!

1:25:12 Brennan: And burns into some of his interior willpower. Fwoom!

1:25:16 Ally: What is this?

1:25:17 Siobhan: Yeah, what is this thing?

1:25:19 Brennan: It's an ability in 5e called Legendary Resistance. Yep.

1:25:21 Zac: Fuck.

1:25:22 Brennan: It's not infinite. It's just very powerful.

1:25:26 Siobhan: That didn't, okay. So can I cast a cantrip as a bonus action or no?

1:25:31 Brennan: Yes, as a bonus action, if you have a bonus action cantrip you can, but what else do you have?

1:25:34 Siobhan: I don't have a bonus action cantrip, fuck, fuck, fuck. And my weapon is attacking this robot over here. [sighs] Can I fuckin' punch him, there's nothing else I can do!

1:25:45 Murph: Can you throw me towards Kingston, 'cause I'm so fucked up right now.

1:25:47 Emily: Oh, yeah, you’re a little paralyzed boy.

1:25:49 Murph: I'm just paralyzed up there, if you could throw the bird—

1:25:52 Ally: Throw a dead bird off a balcony?

1:25:54 Murph: Oh actually, I'm a rat, I'm a rat again.

1:25:55 Lou: Throw the dead bird.

1:25:56 Emily: He's not dead, he's paralyzed!

1:25:57 Siobhan: I'll do that.

1:25:59 Brennan: Rad. You move and just huck—

1:26:02 Siobhan: Jesus Christ.

1:26:02 Brennan: You see that Kugrash, it's like that little thing of a little rat body goes, fling, and like, [imitates splat] lands.

1:26:08 Zac: That thing of like?

1:26:10 Siobhan: Hashtag relatable!

1:26:12 Brennan: I'm trying to think about taking it, like a little, gross, mangy rat, and just a very anti-climatic, [imitates honk] as it honks and lands on the ground.

1:26:22 Ally: It's like when you throw a rat, you know, that sound it makes?

1:26:25 Siobhan: Yeah, we all know—

1:26:26 Brennan: Good night, folks, I'm gonna head out!

1:26:29 Siobhan: What else, what else, what else, what else?

1:26:30 Lou: Because everyone knows that, that sound—

1:26:32 Brennan: Everyone get in the fuckin' comments, rats honk when you throw them!

1:26:38 Ally: Don't @ me.

1:26:39 Brennan: Rowan, yeah, you toss the rat, no sweat.

1:26:41 Siobhan: And can I just take a quick look at Robert Moses and just, I would love to see what his fucking deal is, 'cause we haven't really been this close to him, face-to-face, and all of a sudden, he's green?

1:26:54 Brennan: Yeah, he's calling with some, he no, it looks like he, make whatever roll you're gonna make, make Insight or Arcana or whatever you like.

1:27:01 Siobhan: Great. I'll do Insight, 16?

1:27:08 Brennan: Robert Moses purified himself, and is no longer considered undead, but is undead.

1:27:15 Siobhan: Oh shit.

1:27:16 Brennan: He purified himself, so in other words, he has all the abilities and none of the weaknesses of undead.

1:27:21 Siobhan: Motherfucker.

1:27:23 Brennan: That's gonna be Rowan. Buh-buh-bum. Now--

1:27:28 Siobhan: Oh, is the list still up there?

1:27:30 Brennan: Yeah.

1:27:31 Siobhan: He's just thrown it on the ground, right?

1:27:31 Brennan: He's tossed it on the ground.

1:27:32 Siobhan: I don't have enough time though to also pick up the list.

1:27:34 Brennan: No, you do not.

1:27:35 Siobhan: All right, well, next time.

1:27:36 Emily: It takes a lot to throw a rat.

1:27:37 Siobhan: It does.

1:27:38 Emily: As we all know.

1:27:39 Lou: Well, exactly.

1:27:40 Siobhan: It’s a loud--

1:27:41 Lou: This constant action we're always seeing of throwing rats.

1:27:44 Ally: This weekend, I threw a rat. And it, I had to sleep right after.

1:27:46 Lou: I threw a rat, you know, right before we started filming this.

1:27:50 Brennan: Cool. That's going to be...

1:27:54 Emily: This is stressing me out, I'm much less stressed now that Pete is no longer dead, but he's still at 1 hit point and it's--

1:28:00 Zac: 1 hit point, yeah.

1:28:01 Emily: Giving me serious anxiety.

1:28:03 Brennan: I'm gonna need a Constitution save from Rowan.

1:28:05 Ally: Oh, I didn't Wild Magic.

1:28:07 Brennan: I'm gonna need a Wild Magic.

1:28:08 Ally: 2.

1:28:09 Siobhan: This isn't for my Concentration?

1:28:10 Brennan: But it was back to 1.

1:28:11 Ally: So close, it was back to 1, so 2.

1:28:14 Brennan: Give me that Constitution save?

1:28:17 Siobhan: [drops the die] Oh fuck.

1:28:18 Lou: Ai chi!

1:28:20 Siobhan: 8.

1:28:22 Brennan: He reaches out and sucker punches you in the stomach and you are paralyzed. Boom!

1:28:30 Robert: Take it easy, Miss Berry.

1:28:32 Brennan: You also take 13 points of cold damage

1:28:37 Siobhan: Okay, I have a question. Since I'm a War Caster, can I still cast...

1:28:44 Brennan: Can you hold on to your concentration? Well, give me another Constitution 'cause he just did damage to you, so you take 13 points of cold damage.

1:28:50 Siobhan: Okay. Hang on. And then this is for my concentration, I got an 18. Or, 20.

1:28:59 Brennan: Cool, great.

1:29:00 Murph: Oh, can we keep concentrating when we're paralyzed?

1:29:03 Brennan: I actually believe that we, yeah, you can.

1:29:05 Murph: Okay, 'cause I had my fire elemental go, but if you don't mind, can I roll to keep him?

1:29:08 Brennan: Yeah, go for it.

1:29:09 Murph: Okay, cool. I got two 2s.

1:29:12 Brennan: You do not keep him.

1:29:13 Lou: My man.

1:29:15 Siobhan: But— Murph, drinking from his water bottle, gives a peace sign salute to Lou. Lou laughs.

1:29:19 Brennan: Cool.

1:29:19 Ally: Two gang!

1:29:20 Brennan: You are paralyzed.

1:29:22 Murph: So I can't talk or anything?

1:29:24 Brennan: No, you are fully—

1:29:25 Murph: We're Mind Linked though, right?

1:29:26 Ally: You can Mind Link.

1:29:27 Murph: Yeah, I just was like, can I, 'cause I have War Caster, so I don't have to use my hands to cast spells, but if I can't talk also---

1:29:35 Brennan: Can't talk, yeah. Can't move or speak.

1:29:37 Siobhan: Yeah.

1:29:38 Brennan: That's gonna be Ricky. [Lou laughs in a high voice]

1:29:43 Emily: God, this is so tired!

1:29:48 Zac: He, okay, so I'm just going to try to kill this one and run over, because I don't feel like he'll get attacks of opportunity and sit around me.

1:29:56 Sofia: You got this, Ricky! I believe in you!

1:29:58 Zac: He has disadvantage 'cause there's an umbrella in his face?

1:30:00 Brennan: That is correct. Rather, you have advantage, 'cause this umbrella's going, voom-voom, voom, voom-voom-voom-voom, and popping in his grill.

1:30:06 Lou: My God.

1:30:07 Zac: No way.

1:30:08 Ally: You still have Ox?

1:30:08 Zac: A 1 and a 2?

1:30:10 Lou: Another 1 on the first—

1:30:10 Zac: Jesus Christ.

1:30:11 Murph: You have luck points?

1:30:12 Zac: Yeah, I'm gonna use a luck point on that.

1:30:14 Brennan: Cool.

1:30:15 Zac: Do I get to roll two again, or just—

1:30:16 Brennan: No, just one.

1:30:16 Zac: Okay. Okay, does 17 hit?

1:30:20 Brennan: 17 hits.

1:30:20 Emily: Woo!

1:30:21 Zac: So I'll Divine Smite him. I'll do a second level Divine Smite on him.

1:30:26 Brennan: Cool, so that's gonna be 5d8 plus 8.

1:30:29 Zac: Okay. Can I have someone else's d8s?

1:30:34 Emily: Oh yes. Come on, get in there, pink!

1:30:37 Zac: 5d8s plus 8, okay. I got 'em. Okay.

1:30:42 Emily: Oh my God, I got an 8. My kid got an 8.

1:30:43 Lou: What's my kid doing?

1:30:44 Zac: I had three 8s, plus 9.

1:30:46 Ally: Fuck yeah.

1:30:47 Emily: [crosstalk, quietly] Yes, I think got an 8.

1:30:47 Lou: [crosstalk, quietly] Dude, I just did 3. I gotta talk to my fuckin’ kids.

1:30:48 Zac: 8, 16, 24… 33 plus 8?

1:30:50 Lou: About what they do when they leave my house. [Brennan with a look of disbelief]

1:30:53 Ally: 41.

1:30:54 Brennan: 41, Jesus Christ. Okay, yeah.

1:30:58 Zac: Is he still up?

1:30:59 Brennan: He is still up. But you see him go, whoom! And slash his chest wide open and it burns and starts turning to ash. He looks fucked up.

1:31:07 Zac: All right, I'm going to take my second swing at him.

1:31:10 Brennan: Cool. This one also has advantage.

1:31:14 Zac: That's a 28.

1:31:15 Brennan: Yep, that hits.

1:31:16 Zac: And then I'll just do a first level Divine Smite on him.

1:31:19 Brennan: Yeah, that's gonna be 4d8 plus 8.

1:31:20 Zac: Okay. Just…

1:31:23 Lou: [quietly, to Emily] It’s, my kid didn’t do well.

1:31:25 Emily: [gasps] Mine got a 1. It’s like they achieve, then they underachieve.

1:31:26 Lou: [crosstalk] Kids are tough.

1:31:27 Zac: That is 5, 7, 8, plus 8. 16. Brennan stands up and mimes a massive hit, then takes the vampire’s mini off the board.

1:31:34 Brennan: Whoom!

1:31:36 Zac: Finally!

1:31:38 Ally: One down!

1:31:39 Siobhan: Fuck, man. Our only person, I mean, now Sofia has radiant damage, but—

1:31:43 Zac: And then now with—

1:31:45 Emily: Yeah, but I'm also stunned.

1:31:46 Zac: Don't I get—

1:31:47 Brennan: You have Ox's movement. Yeah, absolutely.

1:31:49 Zac: Okay, so I'll use Ox's movement and run all the way--

1:31:51 Brennan: What is Ox's movement, it's like--

1:31:52 Zac: He has 40.

1:31:53 Brennan: 40.

1:31:54 Zac: Plus mine.

1:31:55 Brennan: So you, five, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, 35, 40, 45—

1:32:00 Zac: Can I use a double movement with Ox?

1:32:02 Brennan: Yes, you can, actually.

1:32:03 Zac: Okay.

1:32:04 Brennan: So that's, five, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, You make it all the way here. In fact, actually, if you want to make it even closer, you can probably make it over here, 'cause diagonals are better in 5e.

1:32:17 Zac: Okay.

1:32:18 Brennan: I'm gonna, if you want to be, or if you want to be over there, you can too.

1:32:20 Murph: Dope, does help on saving throws. [laughs]

1:32:23 Zac: Yes. But that's only 10 feet, so I'm trying to decide if I—

1:32:27 Brennan: You're hitting Kingston and Kug there.

1:32:29 Murph: And I'm fucking dead.

1:32:30 Zac: All right.

1:32:30 Zac: So that'd be dope.

1:32:31 Lou: You're not dead, you're just paralyzed.

1:32:32 Emily: Ox is probably kind of drooling a little bit, and it's getting in the blood, and it's messing it up a little bit.

1:32:38 Brennan: Mm-hmm.

1:32:39 Emily: Okay. [laughter]

1:32:41 Zac: I...

1:32:43 Brennan: Just tell me where you're moving. Do you move there or there?

1:32:46 Zac: I think right there.

1:32:47 Brennan: Cool.

1:32:48 Zac: Will be good.

1:32:49 Brennan: Cool, 'cause you took your attacks, so you're gravy.

1:32:52 Zac: All right.

1:32:52 Brennan: You rush up, boom. That's Ricky. You see that again, Robert Moses with everyone paralyzed and stunned on the dais with him goes,

1:33:07 Robert: I hold the key to the city!

1:33:09 Brennan: Whoom! Takes the key out, clatters to the ground.

1:33:17 Emily: [whispering] Fucker! [bass thud]

1:33:21 Brennan: And the objects go.

1:33:28 Siobhan: Oh, the objects, that's me.

1:33:29 Brennan: Yep!

1:33:31 Siobhan: What, who? How far does his Globe of whatevers extend?

1:33:39 Brennan: 10 feet.

1:33:41 Siobhan: Okay.

1:33:43 Zac: Could I have taken the umbrella with me?

1:33:46 Brennan: Just grabbed it? Attack, attack, move, move, move. You didn't use a bonus action, I'll say bonus action you grab the umbrella.

1:33:52 Siobhan: Okay.

1:33:53 Emily: Oh my God, I'm just picturing you twirling your umbrella on your dalmatian!

1:34:01 Siobhan: So cute. So I would like to have, the one that's far away, I would just like to do a dash action.

1:34:08 Brennan: Cool.

1:34:09 Siobhan: So it's as close to everybody as possible.

1:34:11 Brennan: So it's five, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30… 35, 40, 45, 50, 55, 60.

1:34:21 Siobhan: Great. Can the kiosk pick Ricky up? It's right next to him.

1:34:28 Brennan: Mm-hmm.

1:34:28 Siobhan: And throw him up on that balcony?

1:34:31 Brennan: Give me a, I'm gonna say that's a DC20 Athletics check.

1:34:35 Siobhan: Great.

1:34:36 Lou: Fuckin' part of a kiosk?

1:34:38 Siobhan: Athletics is Strength, right?

1:34:40 Brennan: That's correct.

1:34:40 Siobhan: So I have 14 Strength, that's pretty good.

1:34:44 Brennan: So you're gonna need a plus 2, so you're gonna need an 18 or higher to get him up there. I'll say on a 15 or higher, Ricky can grab the bottom ledge.

1:34:54 Siobhan: Okay, great. And do I get extra on, this isn't a saving throw.

1:34:58 Brennan: No.

1:34:58 Siobhan: Okay. So I just need to get—

1:35:00 Emily: 15 or higher.

1:35:04 Siobhan: That's an 11. So 11 plus 2, so 13.

1:35:07 Brennan: This thing, whoom, grabs Ricky. Huh! Hucks him. And he, boom.

1:35:11 Siobhan: Oh no, I want to pick him up and take him over there. I don't want to throw him.

1:35:14 Brennan: Oh, gotcha! Okay, so in that, it's not throwing him.

1:35:18 Siobhan: Yeah.

1:35:18 Brennan: Oh, in that case there's—

1:35:19 Siobhan: Just carrying him like some kind of beautiful divan.

1:35:23 Brennan: Yeah, you see it just actually just lifts him up.

1:35:26 Siobhan: Yeah.

1:35:27 Brennan: Up so that he's like--

1:35:27 Siobhan: So give him, to give him a step up.

1:35:29 Brennan: Yep, there you go.

1:35:30 Siobhan: To there.

1:35:31 Brennan: Boom, that's, there's no roll necessary.

1:35:32 Siobhan: Great.

1:35:34 Lou: Still would've been cool.

1:35:35 Brennan: It still would have been cool.

1:35:36 Emily: Is he still, is Kug still on his range for saving throws?

1:35:39 Brennan: Nope.

1:35:39 Emily: Okay, well, what do you know.

1:35:41 Siobhan: Sorry.

1:35:42 Emily: Sacrifices.

1:35:43 Brennan: Unless you—

1:35:43 Emily: It's good.

1:35:44 Lou: Sacrifices are important.

1:35:45 Emily: Yeah.

1:35:45 Brennan: Cool.

1:35:46 Siobhan: And then, can I also have it smash against the balcony, or is that too many things?

1:35:53 Brennan: That's too many things.

1:35:55 Zac: Can you just do that and leave me on the ground? And that way I can just kip up the thing?

1:35:59 Siobhan: Are you sure?

1:36:01 Zac: I'm pretty sure I can do that.

1:36:02 Siobhan: Okay, great.

1:36:03 Brennan: Yeah, so Ricky, you don't have to go if you don't want to.

1:36:04 Zac: I stay—

1:36:05 Siobhan: He can stay next to Kug. [Emily laughs]

1:36:07 Lou: He's just like, Ricky!

1:36:08 Zac: I mean, it looks like steps, right?

1:36:10 Siobhan: Yeah, that's true.

1:36:10 Lou: Please, Ricky? Please get on me.

1:36:13 Brennan: Awesome. So that—

1:36:15 Siobhan: Okay, so I'll do an attack roll, then, against the balcony.

1:36:17 Brennan: Against the balcony, or against one of these? Or yeah, balcony's fine.

1:36:21 Emily: Aren’t you paralyzed?

1:36:23 Siobhan: Yeah, no, it's the machine, it's the Animate Objects.

1:36:27 Emily: Oh.

1:36:28 Brennan: Go ahead and make an attack roll against the balcony.

1:36:30 Emily: I like this. Yeah, little machine, fuck him up!

1:36:36 Siobhan: 16.

1:36:37 Brennan: 16 hits, go ahead and roll damage.

1:36:38 Siobhan: Great.

1:36:39 Lou: It hits that fuckin' balcony. [laughter]

1:36:41 Emily: Yeah, fuck that balcony, that's not wearing plate armor!

1:36:43 Ally: It's a DC24 balcony.

1:36:44 Lou: Yeah.

1:36:45 Emily: Huh, Moses? Should have gotten plate armor for your fuckin' balcony.

1:36:47 Siobhan: That's 13 damage to the balcony.

1:36:50 Brennan: Whoom! You see Robert Moses wobbles a little bit as this thing cracks into the stone balcony. Balcony's looking pretty structurally sound, it's a huge, stone balcony. But it's, some cracks appear in it.

1:37:02 Emily: Okay.

1:37:04 Brennan: Awesome, that's the objects. Kugrash, we're at you, you are paralyzed. That means you cannot take actions. But at the end of your turn, you may roll another saving throw.

1:37:14 Murph: Okay, is this Con?

1:37:15 Brennan: This is a...

1:37:20 Lou: This is become—

1:37:21 Brennan: This is a Constitution saving throw.

1:37:22 Lou: To become unparalyzed?

1:37:23 Zac: You add 4 to it.

1:37:24 Brennan: So you've, your turn, you cannot move or speak. Paralyzed usually is incapacitated, can't move or speak.

1:37:32 Murph: This is at the end of my turn.

1:37:33 Brennan: This is at the end of your turn.

1:37:36 Murph: [sighs] All right. I only have a plus 1 on Constitution, so it's a tough one. [rolls, slams the table] Nat fucking 1. [Brennan sighs]

1:37:46 Brennan: You, [imitates choking] twitch on the ground, necromantic magic seizing you. That's gonna be the vampires.

1:37:52 Siobhan: Oh shit.

1:37:53 Lou: Mm, that's gonna be the vampires. [tense, dark music]

1:37:56 Ally: We're just mad at this point, we're like, fuck you.

1:38:02 Brennan: This one's going to make… Cool. This one's going to grab Sofia.

1:38:11 Emily: So I'm stunned and grappled?

1:38:13 Brennan: Yep.

1:38:14 Emily: Life is good.

1:38:16 Siobhan: Oh my God, well guys, it's been good knowing you. This has been fun.

1:38:20 Lou: Hey.

1:38:20 Emily: Dale, I’m comin’.

1:38:21 Siobhan: 14 episodes.

1:38:22 Brennan: This one actually, hold on.

1:38:25 Lou: It explodes? [laughs]

1:38:26 Siobhan: Yeah, if like—

1:38:27 Lou: Is that exactly what you were rolling for?

1:38:28 Emily: It’s a Wild Magic sorcerer and he uh--

1:38:30 Brennan: Now this one grabs Rowan.

1:38:34 Emily: He just wants to keep us away from him.

1:38:38 Brennan: This one goes to the ground here. And is going to take a swing at Ricky. Hits, Ricky, you're grappled. [Lou mumbles]

1:38:56 Zac: So I'm just grappled, no damage?

1:38:57 Brennan: You are just grappled, no damage.

1:39:02 Zac: [whispers] Fuck you!

1:39:03 Brennan: Buh-buh-bum. That's going to be, that's all the vampires that there are, so it's gonna be Sofia.

1:39:09 Emily: Okay, so I'm stunned and I'm grappled. [laughter]

1:39:13 Brennan: That's correct.

1:39:16 Emily: You know, I guess I'm just going to have a think, you know, while I have this down time. So—

1:39:21 Brennan: At the end of your turn, you may make a—

1:39:23 Emily: A roll to try and get unstunned.

1:39:25 Brennan: Yes, that's correct.

1:39:27 Emily: Okay.

1:39:28 Siobhan: Jesus.

1:39:29 Emily: So we just gotta fast forward to that. Okay, cool. [clears throat] What am I doing, Con save? [sighs] 11.

1:39:37 Brennan: [imitates choking] You remain frozen. At the end of your turn--

1:39:42 Ally: Did you have Bardic?

1:39:43 Emily: I already used it.

1:39:44 Ally: Ahh.

1:39:45 Brennan: At the end of your turn. One of them is going to hit you for… 1, 2, for 10 damage. Your HP max is reduced by 7. As it drinks your blood.

1:40:12 Siobhan: [whispering] Fuck, man. [normal voice] There's no way that we can do this.

1:40:21 Brennan: Rowan, you are hit for your HP max is reduced by 10. 1, 2...

1:40:33 Siobhan: [to Brennan] Are you enjoying this, are you having fun? Are you having a good time?

1:40:36 Lou: It is so wild to feel the energy that is normally at this table— Brennan, grinning, sticks his tongue out.

1:40:39 Ally: Mm-hmm.

1:40:40 Lou: Put that tongue back in your fuckin' mouth. Brennan wiggles both his eyebrows and his tongue.

1:40:41 Emily: You're a vampire!

1:40:42 Ally: Put that tongue deep in your mouth!

1:40:43 Siobhan: Dog killing motherfucker.

1:40:44 Emily: He's being a vampire, he's taking our powers.

1:40:47 Lou: Put it the other way in your, take that tongue—

1:40:49 Brennan: Ricky, this one goes to bite you, it does not successfully bite you.

1:40:52 Zac: Okay.

1:40:53 Brennan: That's gonna be Pete, that's your turn.

1:40:55 Ally: Great.

1:40:55 Brennan: You're prone, you can spend half your movement to stand up.

1:40:58 Ally: Oh, sorry, I already put myself up.

1:40:59 Brennan: So yeah, half your movement's standing up.

1:41:01 Ally: That's fine, can I roll an Arcana check to see what would happen if I cast Dispel Magic in Nod at the door on the other side?

1:41:09 Brennan: Give me an Arcana check, go ahead and roll with advantage.

1:41:14 Ally: Yeah, that's great. A 22.

1:41:18 Brennan: You can't hit Nod from here unless you get to Nod, but as you're looking, you're like, tingling with your Dispel Magic, you realize that nothing, no spell can bypass the Globe of Invulnerability unless it's higher than fifth level. However, a spell can reach the Globe itself. So there is a potential to dispel that Globe of Invulnerability.

1:41:41 Ally: Got it. I could get to Nod if I Blinked, but that would be a lot of turns.

1:41:47 Brennan: That would be a lot of turns, and there would be a chance that it wouldn't happen.

1:41:49 Ally: Great, then I am going to use half my movement to get up, and then the second half of my movement to duck behind here.

1:41:57 Brennan: Cool.

1:41:58 Ally: And cast Dispel Magic on the Globe.

1:42:00 Brennan: Fuck yeah, let's see this. This is gonna be Box of Doom, 100 percent.

1:42:04 Ally: Level 3 or lower, I cast it, but 4 and up it's a roll.

1:42:08 Brennan: This is definitely above that, this is a, let me see, one, two, three, four, five, this is a sixth level spell.

1:42:15 Ally: I'm absolutely gonna do Bend Luck. Cast another sorcery, a couple sorcery points.

1:42:21 Brennan: Cool. Yeah, this is sixth level. Where is Dispel Magic? Hold on.

1:42:27 Emily: You know, when I die in this fight, Lou, on hearing that, groans nervously and shakes his head.

1:42:29 Emily: I'm gonna always fondly remember that I finally got to use Tipsy Sway.

1:42:34 Ally: [singing] Aww!

1:42:36 Siobhan: You guys, it’s been really fun.

1:42:38 Lou: Oh, come on, everybody! [laughs] We can do this!

1:42:42 Siobhan: I'm just glad that I got to have—

1:42:43 Lou: Read your cards! [laughs] Read them again!

1:42:46 Emily: I have been going over all my cards and being like, there's gotta be something! I can't get stunned, can I?

1:42:52 Ally: Yeah, this Dispel Magic is on my Plugs Med bracelet.

1:42:55 Brennan: Ooh, awesome, that's right! So this is gonna be, it's a DC16, we're gonna get the Box of Doom out.

1:43:00 Murph: [whispers] Fuck.

1:43:01 Ally: Am I gonna roll—

1:43:03 Brennan: So it's just plus—

1:43:04 Ally: Bend Luck?

1:43:05 Brennan: So you're gonna roll Bend Luck, go ahead and roll Bend Luck in the box first.

1:43:09 Ally: Okay.

1:43:11 Brennan: 1.

1:43:13 Murph: [whispers] Fuck.

1:43:13 Ally: Fuck! [laughs]

1:43:15 Lou: Hey.

1:43:16 Ally: I hate these dice!

1:43:17 Lou: Nat 20s exist.

1:43:18 Brennan: So now, the difficulty is 15. You have a plus 5 to your Charisma bonus, which is what you're rolling to dispel, let me double check that.

1:43:28 Zac: Are you near me? Oh, nevermind. It doesn't matter.

1:43:31 Brennan: You need to roll a 10 or higher.

1:43:32 Ally: M’kay.

1:43:33 Lou: That's very doable.

1:43:37 Brennan and Ally: 17! [cheering]

1:43:39 Ally: Fuck yeah!

1:43:40 Brennan: Pete, you raise up from death, You see that—

1:43:43 Ally: Gemini dice. [kisses their d20] [Emily laughs]

1:43:45 Brennan: You see that Robert looks down at you and says,

1:43:46 Emily: Gemini season.

1:43:48 Brennan: Robert suddenly says

1:43:49 Robert: I thought I fuckin' killed you.

1:43:52 Pete: You didn't, bitch. [laughter]

1:43:55 Brennan: Boom!

1:43:56 Ally: As I'm hiding. [peeks out from behind cover]

1:43:57 Brennan: The Globe is fucking gone. [sound of shattering glass]

1:44:00 Ally: Good!

1:44:01 Siobhan: I'm so paralyzed, but so impressed.

1:44:03 Ally: Yeah.

1:44:04 Siobhan: And I hope that you can see it in my eyes.

1:44:05 Emily: I'm both stunned and grappled and I'm impressed. Oh, but you don't want to fuck me.

1:44:08 Brennan: Roll for Wild Magic.

1:44:09 Ally: Oh, right. 3, I keep being one above when it would trigger.

1:44:14 Brennan: One above what it would trigger, exactly.

1:44:17 Ally: [whispering] Goddamn.

1:44:18 Brennan: Incredible. That's going to—

1:44:21 Siobhan: Wait, does Pete still have the radiance from the previous...

1:44:27 Brennan: Oh, the radiance? No, him dying somewhat faded the glow on him. But he's back now! Kingston, that's gonna be you.

1:44:35 Lou: I walk over to Kugrash and I pour a bunch of Holy Grail detergent on him.

1:44:39 Ally: Wait, do you, oh yeah, yeah, good.

1:44:41 Kingston: We gotta get Kug up.

1:44:42 Emily: Yeah.

1:44:43 Zac: What's that do?

1:44:44 Lou: It's a Greater Restoration.

1:44:45 Murph: Oh hell yes. [Brennan imitates whirring]

1:44:48 Kugrash: [whispering] Fucking thank you!

1:44:49 Brennan: Yes, you are fixed. That's your action, any bonus action or anything else?

1:44:53 Lou: Mm-mm, that's my, oh, a bonus? No.

1:44:56 Brennan: Cool, no worries.

1:44:57 Murph: I have—

1:44:58 Lou: Oh.

1:44:59 Murph: Are we getting a sense that this, that their stuff is powered by that greed, by that shit we saw in hell and stuff?

1:45:05 Brennan: Certainly, yeah.

1:45:06 Murph: And what happens when I eat the bagel?

1:45:09 Brennan: [echoey sci-fi music begins to play] Oh, you go full, it's a full fuckin' cosmic, it's, I'll put it this way. I, as the DM, haven't invented a mechanic for what that does, because what it does is so potent.

1:45:27 Siobhan: [whispering] Fuck him up.

1:45:28 Emily: I thought that it was like killing yourself.

1:45:30 Siobhan: Yeah.

1:45:31 Brennan: It kind of, it destroys yourself.

1:45:34 Lou: Also, I am gonna use—

1:45:35 Brennan: Yes.

1:45:36 Lou: Sorry, I am going to use a bonus action, I'm realizing that the Holy Grail detergent is not a spell, I'll cast a—

1:45:41 Murph: Oh, nice.

1:45:42 Lou: Third level, I'll cast a… A fourth level Mass Healing word on errbody.

1:45:53 Brennan: Let's see how much that does.

1:45:55 Lou: 2d4. 2, come on, dawg. 6.

1:45:58 Ally: Yeah.

1:45:59 Lou: 6 plus my spellcasting ability modifier.

1:46:02 Brennan: Which is 5.

1:46:03 Lou: Which is 5.

1:46:04 Ally: So 11.

1:46:05 Lou: Everybody takes 11 hit points.

1:46:09 Ally: Wait, [whispers] ah, yeah. [normal voice] Are we, we're really close to his full thing being over.

1:46:14 Lou: Oh yes.

1:46:15 Siobhan: So we just really need—

1:46:16 Ally: We need to fucking attack.

1:46:17 Brennan: Kingston, Robert Moses looks at you, raises his hand, hits you for 34 points of damage with a Fire Bolt.

1:46:26 Lou: Okay.

1:46:27 Brennan: 34 points of fire damage. And then he goes,

1:46:31 Robert: I'm getting real tired of you putting people back in the fight, Vox.

1:46:38 Kingston: Okay. [laughter]

1:46:40 Brennan: You then, hold on one second, I gotta get some dice out.

1:46:44 Siobhan: Oh no! [lots of dice rattling]

1:46:46 Zac: Hey, Brennan, fuck you!

1:46:47 Emily: He's looking for the d4s, he's looking for the d4s!

1:46:48 Lou: Quit it with this Reddit bullshit!

1:46:49 Siobhan: Really, stick a fucking eagle statue up your ass, dude! Brennan winks into the camera.

1:46:54 Zac: I’ve figured it out! If we just kick Brennan's ass-- [laughter]

1:46:55 Murph: Six on one stomping.

1:46:57 Ally: We all just start kicking Brennan's ass!

1:46:59 Lou: Turn these fuckin' cameras off! [Miming to get up]

1:47:01 Emily: Let's just take a fuckin' DM's guide and just whap him over the head!

1:47:05 Lou: I wanna cut right now, then we'll cut back and Brennan will just be covered in bruises. Robert Moses says he doesn't want to do what he wants to do. [laughs]

1:47:13 Emily: Robert Moses had a change of heart, and he's taking us all to a Yankees game.

1:47:17 Brennan: I need a Constitution saving throw from Kingston.

1:47:20 Lou: No!

1:47:21 Zac: Is he within 10 feet from me?

1:47:22 Lou: Am I within, yes. So what happens now?

1:47:24 Zac: Adding 4.

1:47:25 Lou: Ooh, bah bah. [laughs] 12, plus 4, plus 7 equals more, 19... 23.

1:47:38 Zac: 26.

1:47:39 Lou: 26.

1:47:39 Brennan: 26? You see he points a finger at you and says,

1:47:45 Robert: Die! [imitates magical blast]

1:47:47 Brennan: And this helixing spiral of ash and smoke, and you smell the stink of iron and blood and grime, it hits your chest. You would have taken 52 points of damage, instead you take 26 points of damage.

1:48:04 Lou: [whisper] Okay.

1:48:05 Brennan: How's Kingston looking?

1:48:07 Lou: I was at 65 after the first, now I'm taking 26?

1:48:11 Brennan: 26.

1:48:12 Lou: So I'll be at 39.

1:48:15 Brennan: Insane.

1:48:17 Lou: I'm really thankful for Cockrash. [laughter]

1:48:21 Brennan: That's—

1:48:22 Siobhan: Say it again.

1:48:23 Lou: [singing] I'm thankful!

1:48:26 Brennan: You see Robert lifts his hand up in the air after he does that and says,

1:48:30 Robert: [shouting] Sinatra's Law! If you can make it here…

1:48:37 Brennan: And that's the end of his turn. That's going to go to Rowan. You are grappled and paralyzed.

1:48:44 Siobhan: I mean, is there anything I can do?

1:48:46 Brennan: Cannot take actions.

1:48:47 Ally: You could give a Bardic?

1:48:49 Siobhan: Can I give a Bardic?

1:48:50 Brennan: No, I will, let me actually see. We're gonna look at--

1:48:52 Zac: Paralyzed from where? [laughs]

1:48:54 Siobhan: Right, at what point am I paralyzed from?

1:48:56 Brennan: Can't take actions or reactions, that doesn't say bonus actions. Hold on one second.

1:49:00 Emily: Oh really?

1:49:04 Siobhan: In which case, I Misty Step, and...

1:49:09 Brennan: Creature automatically, I'm gonna say you can take a bonus action if you think that you could do it without speaking or moving.

1:49:16 Ally: Misty Step on to Robert's head. [laughs] Seriously.

1:49:21 Brennan: Misty Step specifically has verbal and somatic components.

1:49:24 Siobhan: Oh, right.

1:49:25 Brennan: Or just verbal I think.

1:49:28 Siobhan: Who hasn't gone yet, Ricky?

1:49:30 Brennan: Ricky has not gone yet.

1:49:31 Siobhan: Sick, okay. I'm going to give Bardic inspiration to Ricky.

1:49:37 Brennan: You see a paralyzed Rowan looks over at you, honestly, without moving or speaking, she's just so hot!

1:49:46 Zac: Awesome.

1:49:47 Brennan: And you're like, I'm a fuckin' hero, my hot—

1:49:50 Siobhan: Save me, Ricky!

1:49:53 Brennan: Incredible, Rowan, we're at the end of your turn. You can make another—

1:49:56 Ally: The two hottest staring at each other.

1:49:56 Zac: Just like, so pure.

1:49:56 Brennan: You can make another Constitution, another Constitution check.

1:50:00 Siobhan: Great. This is not for my concentration, this is just a regular—

1:50:07 Brennan: Your concentration's fine for right now, this is just for the Paralyzing Touch.

1:50:11 Siobhan: Great. Oh fuck. 20, not nat.

1:50:16 Emily: Ooh!

1:50:17 Brennan: You become unparalyzed.

1:50:18 Siobhan: Okay, but I'm still grappled.

1:50:21 Brennan: You are still grappled, that is correct, yes.

1:50:25 Siobhan: Well, that I can deal with.

1:50:28 Brennan: Cool. Hold on.

1:50:31 Siobhan: Just this body is so young and flexible and agile! [wiggles] I just do a little wiggle, just 'cause it feels good.

1:50:39 Lou: [rythmically] A little wiggle, just 'cause it feels good! I said I do it! [Ally sings musical hits]

1:50:46 Brennan: Cool, that's gonna be--

1:50:48 Lou: Absolute banger in the club. [laughter]

1:50:50 Brennan: Robert looks fuckin' mad, and he, Kingston, hits you again for 10 points of fire damage. These vampires, one of them's gonna take a swing at Rowan.

1:51:09 Lou: I was at 99—

1:51:09 Brennan: Misses.

1:51:10 Lou: At the beginning of this turn.

1:51:11 Brennan: Sorry. Yeah, misses Rowan, as you start wriggling around in his claws. Another one is gonna take a swing at Sofia. Hits, dealing Sofia 7 points of damage.

1:51:18 Emily: [whisper] 'Kay.

1:51:25 Brennan: And then the one with Ricky is going to take a swing, hits for 5 points of damage. And that is now going to be Ricky's turn.

1:51:43 Zac: Okay, Ricky is going to, well, okay. Ricky has that umbrella.

1:51:47 Brennan: Mm-hmm.

1:51:48 Zac: Is it obscuring the view of said vampire robot?

1:51:53 Brennan: Yeah, it can still be providing you advantage on that robot.

1:51:56 Zac: I'm gonna shove to try to get out of it.

1:51:59 Brennan: Cool, so you use one of your attacks.

1:52:00 Zac: Okay.

1:52:01 Brennan: Let me know, so you're just rolling Athletics.

1:52:02 Zac: Is that a, do I have advantage? That's an Athletics.

1:52:05 Brennan: That's an Athletics check.

1:52:06 Zac: Okay, but then I, that takes one of my attacks.

1:52:09 Brennan: It takes one of your attacks out, yeah.

1:52:10 Zac: Okay, it's just Athletics, then? Okay. Does a 16 do it?

1:52:19 Brennan: A 16—

1:52:21 Zac: Can I roll a lucky point?

1:52:24 Brennan: Actually, I need to roll, 'cause this is not the same as an escape for the grapples, this is actually just, oh, you succeed!

1:52:30 Zac: Okay.

1:52:31 Brennan: You, boom. You escape the grapple, and you knock it into the center of the little ritual circle here.

1:52:36 Zac: Okay.

1:52:37 Brennan: Cool. That's one of your attacks, what do you do now?

1:52:38 Zac: And then Ricky and Ox are gonna run up to there and try to hop up on to the--

1:52:44 Brennan: Okay, give me, for both of you, a DC, I'm gonna say 15 Athletics check.

1:52:49 Zac: Okay. Yeah, both of them.

1:52:54 Brennan: Dope.

1:52:54 Ally: Yeah!

1:52:55 Brennan: Boom, boom.

1:52:56 Ally: Oh, we've been needing this! [laughs]

1:52:57 Zac: And then-- [Brennan imitates barking]

1:52:58 Ally: Fucker!

1:52:59 Zac: Ox is going to attack with advantage, and it's a, you know, whatever. What's it called, Blinding Light?

1:53:06 Brennan: Yes, with radiant, or yeah, Pack Tactics.

1:53:09 Zac: Okay, that's a 19 plus, yeah, plus 4. So 23.

1:53:15 Brennan: 23, Robert burns through a Shield spell and Ox still hits him.

1:53:22 Zac: Oh, okay!

1:53:23 Emily: Ooh, yeah, waste that spell slot, you bitch!

1:53:26 Brennan: [looks into the camera] It's realistic! It's like, [Robert Moses voice] aah, dog! I fuckin' hate dogs! I hate dogs, I'm so bad!

1:53:32 Siobhan: I also hate dogs.

1:53:33 Murph: What a bad guy.

1:53:33 Zac: He does 5 damage to him, and then he has to pass a DC11 strength check to, and not be knocked prone.

1:53:39 Brennan: A DC11 strength check. Hey, check it out. Rob ain't too buff. So what is it, DC11 you said?

1:53:46 Brennan: Yes. I'm gonna do Box of Doom, 'cause I think this is humiliating. The cast taps their hands on the table in a drumroll.

1:53:51 Brennan: He needs an 11 or higher to save.

1:53:53 Zac: [whisper] Come on, Ox!

1:53:56 Emily: Come on, everyone's rooting for the pup! [Zac imitates dog calling]

1:53:59 Zac: I'm doing that thing dog owners do.

1:54:00 Siobhan: I'm getting my Cutting Words.

1:54:04 Brennan: 17, he saves.

1:54:05 Siobhan: Wait, mm.

1:54:06 Brennan: Oh sorry, oh yeah, sorry. Roll, roll, no, you can, you said you were gonna roll, so you're allowed to roll.

1:54:09 Siobhan: Yeah. Want to do it in the Box of Doom as well?

1:54:12 Brennan: Yes. So you're going to subtract this, so that means--

1:54:16 Zac: 7 or an 8?

1:54:17 Brennan: So you need to get a 7 or an 8.

1:54:20 Siobhan: Again, it's worth a try. That's a 2. [singing] Nevermind, I tried!

1:54:24 Ally: Never mind, you tried.

1:54:25 Brennan: No worries.

1:54:27 Lou: Trying is succeeding.

1:54:29 Zac: And so I still have one attack.

1:54:31 Ally: In the book of life—

1:54:32 Brennan: Yeah, go for it. Take your attack.

1:54:33 Lou: In the book of life, not in the game, we're losing.

1:54:35 Zac: I'm gonna use a—

1:54:36 Emily: Very much losing!

1:54:37 Zac: A second level Branding Smite.

1:54:39 Brennan: Okay.

1:54:41 Zac: I can't do that and a Divine Smite, right?

1:54:43 Brennan: You can do them both. So, but you haven't used a bonus action, so you can do Branding Smite and Divine Smite if you want. [dramatic music cymbal rolls in]

1:54:48 Zac: Okay, I'll do that.

1:54:49 Brennan: Cool.

1:54:50 Zac: And that's—

1:54:50 Brennan: If you got the slots for it, yeah.

1:54:51 Zac: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

1:54:52 Lou: If you got the slots—

1:54:53 Ally: Honey! [pretends to tilt down sunglasses]

1:54:54 Lou: Honey!

1:54:56 Emily: [campy] If you got the slots…

1:54:56 Siobhan: Honey! [laughter]

1:54:57 Ally: Do it, hey!

1:54:58 Lou: Honey! Honey!

1:54:59 Zac: Yeah, so first level Divine Smite.

1:55:01 Brennan: Yeah, go for it.

1:55:02 Ally: Charge it, honey. Lou laughs, sticking his tongue out.

1:55:02 Zac: I gotta make sure I hit. A 19, so that--

1:55:07 Emily: Ooh!

1:55:07 Zac: 19 plus… 29.

1:55:08 Brennan: Definite hit.

1:55:09 Zac: All right, so that would be—

1:55:10 Siobhan: Charge it to your Amex!

1:55:11 Brennan: And he's undead, so you're gonna add your extra d8 for the Divine Smite.

1:55:15 Zac: M'kay, so that's, can I have 2d8 from somebody?

1:55:17 Emily: Gladly! Lou also donates a die.

1:55:18 Brennan: What slot are you burning for the Divine Smite?

1:55:20 Emily: [very quietly, offscreen] Let’s see how our kids do.

1:55:21 Zac: For the, I have a first level spell.

1:55:23 Brennan: Cool, first level spell. So that's gonna be 3d8 from Divine Smite, plus the d8 for the ax normally, so that's 4d8 plus 2d6 from Branding Smite.

1:55:30 Zac: Yeah.

1:55:31 Ally: Whoa.

1:55:32 Brennan: Plus 8, so you're gonna roll [laughing incredulously] all those dice plus 8!

1:55:34 Emily: Ooh!

1:55:35 Siobhan: Fuck him up, Ricky!

1:55:36 Ally: That's right, Ricky!

1:55:37 Siobhan: Fuck him up!

1:55:38 Zac: All right.

1:55:39 Emily: Ooh, a lot of 7s.

1:55:41 Zac: 8, 7, 7—

1:55:42 Emily: [whispering to Lou] My kid got a 7.

1:55:44 Zac: So 8, 16… 30 points plus 8.

1:55:50 Ally: 38.

1:55:51 Siobhan: Fuck yes.

1:55:52 Brennan: You and your dog bound, Ox goes,

1:55:55 Ox: Wow, Ricky, we're doing it! We're real heroes!

1:55:58 Ricky: [weakly] I hope we are! [laughs]

1:56:00 Brennan: And then you see that, you said 38, right?

1:56:02 Zac: Yeah.

1:56:03 Brennan: And then you see that your ax says,

1:56:05 Ax: Sire, I hunger for this one! Let the light of justice be done to him!

1:56:12 Brennan: You go up, wah, boom! [sound of explosion] And Robert's ribcage scatters out of his suit.

1:56:19 Murph: Jesus.

1:56:22 Brennan: [imitating explosion] He stands. [gasps] The wind kicks up.

1:56:29 Robert: [pointing to Ricky] That's a $12,000 suit, asshole.

1:56:34 Ally: That would be what he says.

1:56:37 Ricky: That's too expensive for a suit.

1:56:38 Emily: Yeah.

1:56:40 Brennan: You see, he looks furious, and, but he is badly, badly hurt.

1:56:51 Zac: And his Shield's gone now, right?

1:56:52 Brennan: Yeah, he used his Shield.

1:56:54 Ally: That was his reaction.

1:56:54 Zac: Yeah.

1:56:55 Siobhan: So he can't use a reaction again, right?

1:56:57 Brennan: Can't use a reaction again.

1:56:57 Zac: I mean, his, that orb.

1:56:59 Siobhan: Oh yeah, the Orb of—

1:57:00 Brennan: The Orb is, yeah.

1:57:01 Ally: That's been gone.

1:57:02 Brennan: The orb is gone, his Shield didn't do shit, and he used his reaction to cast that Shield spell.

1:57:06 Siobhan: Great.

1:57:07 Brennan: It is objects' round.

1:57:08 Siobhan: Great. So since the umbrella is up there, the umbrella is gonna attack.

1:57:14 Brennan: Cool, go for it.

1:57:17 Siobhan: Which is… 20, not nat.

1:57:24 Brennan: 20 hits.

1:57:25 Siobhan: Great.

1:57:25 Brennan: No, he used Shield, it does not hit, sorry. It stays for his whole turn.

1:57:28 Siobhan: Really?

1:57:28 Ally: Mm-hmm.

1:57:30 Brennan: Yeah, Shield stays for his whole turn, yeah.

1:57:31 Siobhan: Okay. And then the kiosks can't get to him, right?

1:57:36 Brennan: They can move, 'cause these, the vampires clambered up on them, so your kiosks can hang on the side and go over and take swings.

1:57:42 Siobhan: Okay, yeah. I'll… I'll give that a go, why not?

1:57:47 Brennan: Yeah, go for it!

1:57:49 Siobhan: Do I have to do Athletics checks for them or something?

1:57:52 Brennan: No, they're just gonna use their movement for this one.

1:57:55 Siobhan: Okay, great.

1:57:56 Brennan: But yeah, just go ahead and make your attack roll.

1:57:58 Siobhan: Great. And the other one as well.

1:58:02 Brennan: Dope. [imitating mechanical whirring] These kiosks come over here.

1:58:07 Ally: Sick.

1:58:08 Brennan: Five, yeah, these animated kiosks are so fun. [Murph laughs]

1:58:12 Brennan: Insane. Cool, they make swings.

1:58:14 Siobhan: Great. Oh, that is gonna hit. Oh, I think. So that's a 21 and a 23.

1:58:22 Brennan: The 23 does hit.

1:58:24 Ally: Ooh!

1:58:28 Murph: Oh right, fuck the Shield.

1:58:33 Siobhan: Nice. So that's, 13, 14, 15.

1:58:38 Brennan: 15 damage.

1:58:39 Siobhan: Yeah.

1:58:40 Brennan: Gee, yeah, he's looking fucked up.

1:58:42 Siobhan: Man, he's still fucking—

1:58:44 Ally: You know, distracted or—

1:58:47 Brennan: At the end of your turn, he looks at you, Ricky. He's gonna take a swing, he hits. I'm gonna need a Constitution saving throw from you.

1:58:56 Zac: Okay.

1:58:56 Emily: Oh, but you're powerful.

1:58:58 Zac: Constitution, so...

1:59:03 Emily: So you get to add 4 to yours?

1:59:04 Zac: I had 20.

1:59:05 Brennan: 20?

1:59:05 Zac: Yeah.

1:59:06 Brennan: You succeed, you are not paralyzed, but you do take… 11 points of cold damage. [somber music]

1:59:18 Brennan: As he, boom, wallops you with one of his fists, and then he concludes his statement.

1:59:27 Siobhan: Oh no.

1:59:27 Robert: [quietly] If you can make it here, [roaring] you can make it anywhere! [imitates explosion]

1:59:37 Brennan: He holds up what looks like a golden gnomish lock, the circle, whoom, glows with red light. [imitates magical blasts]

1:59:51 Lou: Is that guy in the center of it dying? Brennan begins to change the signs on the stock exchange. He accidentally pops the wall out of position.

1:59:52 Brennan: Oop.

1:59:53 Emily: You already replaced that one.

1:59:54 Brennan: [whispering] Sorry. Oh, magnets.

1:59:56 Siobhan: [whispering] You fucking idiot.

1:59:57 Ally: This'll be an insert, this'll just be an insert, we all know that!

2:00:03 Siobhan: [mocking] The runes are upside down, you idiot!

2:00:05 Brennan: I know, I'm bad.

2:00:06 Siobhan: Wow.

2:00:07 Ally: [valley-girl accent] I'm bad.

2:00:08 Brennan: Honestly?

2:00:09 Zac: I’m probably around an idiot a lot but I, uh, I think you're doing a great job.

2:00:12 Brennan: Hey! Thanks, Zac, I appreciate it.

2:00:14 Lou: [whispers] I don't! [laughter] [Brennan imitates explosions]

2:00:18 Brennan: The lock shoots into the center of the, just past that vampire. Vwoom. Disappears into Nod, you see Nod. And the, whoom. Key, the spectral image of the key to the city shoots into the lock in the Golden Door in Nod, [sound of metal clanging] and the door, [imitates explosion] opens. Golden light spreads, boom, everywhere, and you see Nod, the buildings of Nod begin to buckle and snap as though hurricane force winds were rending the sixth borough apart, and the portal to dream, [sound of slamming door] closes. Robert starts laughing. [menacing laughs]

2:01:08 Brennan: That's going to be Kugrash.

2:01:11 Murph: So the ritual's complete?

2:01:15 Brennan: The ritual is complete.

2:01:16 Zac: The door's open, but he hasn't gone through the door yet, right?

2:01:19 Brennan: Well, all of these have happened, and the, it looks like whatever he was trying to do to Nod has occurred, you saw the Golden Door open through the portal into the realm of Nod for the split second that smoke and, [imitates whooshing] appeared, and you saw that indeed, as he held up this lock here, a lock was created on the other side in the door.

2:01:41 Murph: All right. Well, I don't think there's any kind of funky stuff I could pull with the bagel now. I'm just gonna try to do damage to him.

2:01:50 Zac: Yeah.

2:01:51 Emily: I guess so.

2:01:52 Murph: You guys think the bagel idea could work?

2:01:54 Lou: I don't, I mean, I don't fully understand what the bagel does.

2:01:57 Murph: I think I was told—

2:01:57 Ally: It would kill you, though.

2:01:59 Murph: It makes you part of New York.

2:02:02 Lou: So you, I mean. [laughs]

2:02:04 Zac: He told us that he doesn't know what it does. [laughs]

2:02:06 Emily: It sounded like-- Well, he said that--

2:02:07 Brennan: The bagel's so powerful that even I, as a mortal, can't, me, Brennan, I can't tell you what the Bagel of All Things does.

2:02:10 Ally: I have a possible funky idea too.

2:02:13 Murph: All right. Then I'm going to use… I'm gonna use Wall of Fire.

2:02:19 Brennan: Hell yeah.

2:02:21 Murph: And I'm going to set it up in such a way that it is not, starting at him, and then going through here.

2:02:31 Brennan: Okay. So just right on top of him--

2:02:33 Murph: Yeah, so that it doesn't hit my friends here.

2:02:35 Brennan: Cool.

2:02:36 Murph: How long, it is… It's, oh, it's up to 60 feet long.

2:02:40 Brennan: Yeah, you don't have to make it a full 60.

2:02:41 Murph: So I'm just gonna make it over those guys, so 10 feet, whatever the hell it is.

2:02:44 Brennan: Cool, dope. Hell yeah. Go ahead and give me that damage.

2:02:48 Ally: What do you need?

2:02:51 Siobhan: Man, we've gotten so much use out of these little fire things.

2:02:55 Murph: I need five.

2:02:57 Lou: The gift that keeps on—

2:02:58 Ally: How many?

2:02:58 Murph: 5d8s.

2:02:59 Ally: Oh, sick.

2:03:00 Siobhan: Oh, d8.

2:03:01 Lou: [handing a die over] Take my son.

2:03:02 Emily: D8?

2:03:03 Lou: Let my son do well.

2:03:04 Emily: Take my daughter.

2:03:05 Lou: [laughs] Take my daughter.

2:03:06 Murph: I think I'm, I got 5, perfect.

2:03:09 Emily: You got it? Okay. [takes back her die]

2:03:10 Lou: [talking behind his hand to Emily] Okay, here we go, let’s see, let’s see.

2:03:10 Emily: 'Cause she, you know. She usually gives 7s.

2:03:13 Murph: And then they make Dex saving throws.

2:03:15 Lou: I wanted him to get out there. My d6 sons are kind of trash, my d8 son, fuck, my guy got a 2!

2:03:21 Emily: A 2? Oh my God, what are you feeding them at home?

2:03:24 Lou: I don't know, juice?

2:03:26 Murph: 18?

2:03:28 Emily: That's your problem, you gotta feed them oatmeal.

2:03:30 Lou: Okay.

2:03:30 Brennan: You do 18 damage.

2:03:31 Murph: Yeah.

2:03:32 Brennan: Hold on a second.

2:03:33 Lou: I guess my kid is never leaving the house again. [Emily laughs]

2:03:35 Brennan: Okay… And then that one is, buh-buh-buh-bum. [imitates roaring flames] The wall horribly burns them. Which way is the wall facing, by the way?

2:03:51 Murph: The wall is facing—

2:03:55 Zac: Can you block him from that?

2:03:56 Murph: I guess it's facing in, so that it doesn't hurt Kingston.

2:03:59 Brennan: Cool. It faces this way, this one's gotta roll a Dex save, and it takes half that much on a success.

2:04:04 Siobhan: That's fine.

2:04:04 Brennan: Cool.

2:04:06 Lou: Not the kiosk!

2:04:07 Brennan: You figure that out, the kiosk is there. That's your concentration. Your fire elemental's already gone.

2:04:12 Siobhan: It's gone, it's, I rolled a 3.

2:04:14 Brennan: Oh. How much, how many hit points?

2:04:17 Siobhan: So it takes damage.

2:04:18 Brennan: It takes 18 points of damage.

2:04:18 Siobhan: Oh, that's fine. So it's at 38, ah.

2:04:24 Brennan: Make sure it does, yeah, track their hit points as well as your own, yeah.

2:04:27 Murph: And then I'm gonna back up so that I'm not in everybody's line of sight here.

2:04:31 Brennan: Cool. That's Kugrash. Then it's the vampires.

2:04:41 Lou: I don't like when the vampires go.

2:04:43 Ally: Me either. Oh, which time? The six times that they go per round?

2:04:50 Brennan: It's 9, 18, your AC is 19, right?

2:04:54 Emily: Yeah.

2:04:55 Brennan: This one can't bite you, even though you're paralyzed.

2:04:58 Emily: Awesome! Then Tipsy Sway, right?

2:05:01 Brennan: Oh shit!

2:05:02 Emily: Can I do a reaction like that?

2:05:04 Brennan: Yeah, I think you can, actually.

2:05:06 Emily: Can I spend a ki point to make him attack his neighbor? [suspenseful music]

2:05:10 Brennan: You can. He hits! You see that he goes to bite you, and touches your leg, even though you're paralyzed, it triggers some nerve in your leg, and you kick him in the head, and he, [sound of whooshing] wigs out and smacks that dude, for… A bunch of damage.

2:05:26 Emily: Yeah! Fuck each other up!

2:05:28 Brennan: Insane. And then this one's going to attack Rowan, hit. And Rowan, it's going to deal you 18 points of damage… Your HP max is reduced by 13.

2:05:43 Siobhan: Fuck, okay.

2:05:47 Brennan: Vampire here is going to go and move out of the Wall of Fire over here, that kiosk can get a swing on it.

2:06:02 Siobhan: Great.

2:06:04 Brennan: And it's going to go for…

2:06:10 Siobhan: Does 21 hit?

2:06:12 Brennan: It sure does.

2:06:13 Ally: Yeah, stop it! If it gets attack, then it...

2:06:19 Brennan: No, that's only Ricky that has the Sentinel ability. You can go ahead and roll damage.

2:06:25 Siobhan: 15.

2:06:27 Brennan: 15 damage?

2:06:27 Siobhan: Yeah.

2:06:28 Brennan: Hell yeah.

2:06:30 Ally: Oh, that's Sentinel that stops it. Okay. [mutters quietly]

2:06:36 Brennan: Whap! This thing runs over here, makes an attack. Grapples Ricky. Let me see if it was there, it goes five, ten, 15, 20, yeah. So Ricky, you are grappled by this thing. That is going to be… That's them, Sofia, that's back to you.

2:06:57 Emily: Okay. So I'm stunned, what does stunned mean, precisely? Is it, essentially I can't do anything, I just have to roll?

2:07:08 Brennan: You've gotta roll that Con save.

2:07:09 Emily: Okay. But, involuntary actions, maybe I could just at least piss it? [laughter]

2:07:16 Brennan: Yeah, absolutely!

2:07:17 Emily: [laughter] Okay, I do do that. And then… Does a 16 save?

2:07:25 Brennan: What's that?

2:07:26 Lou: I'm just, I'm crossing my fingers.

2:07:28 Brennan: 16 does not save. [Emily laughs]

2:07:33 Brennan: Vampires are gonna go.

2:07:34 Lou: Again?

2:07:35 Brennan: Yep, legendary action. This one's gonna bring Ricky away.

2:07:40 Lou: So soon!

2:07:43 Brennan: Move you over facing this way. This one's going to attack Sofia. Hits.

2:07:52 Siobhan: You mean, Rowan?

2:07:53 Brennan: Oh, no, no. Sofia.

2:07:55 Siobhan: Oh. My one is attacking Sofia?

2:07:58 Brennan: No, no, sorry. This one is attacking Sofia. Sofia, you take another 14 points of damage. Your HP max is reduced by 11. [whispering] That's one, two, three. [normal voice] And then, one of them's gonna make an attack on Rowan, hits.

2:08:26 Siobhan: And I'm gonna do my last Cutting Words on that roll.

2:08:28 Brennan: Okay.

2:08:31 Emily: Does anyone have any spells that unparalyze someone or anything?

2:08:34 Lou: I do, but I'd have to touch you.

2:08:35 Zac: Yeah, same.

2:08:39 Brennan: No. Still gonna hit you.

2:08:41 Siobhan: All right. Well, I wasted so many things this--

2:08:45 Brennan: You take 8 points of damage, your HP max is reduced by 7.

2:08:49 Siobhan: Okay. [sighs]

2:08:51 Brennan: That's their round.

2:08:51 Siobhan: We were feeling so buff at the beginning of this day.

2:08:54 Brennan: Pete, that's you, baby.

2:08:55 Ally: Okay. Can I do Insight to see how fucked up Bob is?

2:09:01 Brennan: Yeah, go for it.

2:09:03 Ally: Great, 8.

2:09:05 Brennan: He, it's hard to tell 'cause he's laughing so hard.

2:09:08 Lou: Can I Mind Link with Pete real quick?

2:09:10 Kingston: Pete, you want to do something crazy?

2:09:11 Pete: Mm-hmm?

2:09:12 Kingston: You want to shoot spells at the same time at Robert Moses, and see what happens?

2:09:15 Ally: Yes, okay, wait, I have a question.

2:09:17 Brennan: Yeah.

2:09:19 Ally: In an earlier episode, Alejandro, and I gave him the juul, said if I say his name three times, he would appear no matter what? That was a promise that he gave me?

2:09:26 Brennan: Yes, absolutely.

2:09:27 Ally: Could I blink to get to the other door in Nod and call Alejandro and start working on this from the other side?

2:09:35 Brennan: Yeah, you can absolutely do that if you'd like.

2:09:37 Kingston: Do your thing, do your thing.

2:09:38 Pete: I like your idea too, but then maybe we can get another actor in on this, we can start shooting stuff back.

2:09:44 Brennan: Cool. I want you to, so you say Alejandro's name three times.

2:09:48 Ally: No, no, I blink first, and then I call Alejandro to—

2:09:50 Brennan: Okay, go ahead, you cast Blink, go ahead and give me your roll, so that's your action.

2:09:55 Ally: Uh-huh.

2:09:55 Brennan: Go ahead and give me your roll for Blink to see if you go to Nod or not.

2:09:59 Ally: Okay, it's 11 or higher. No! [laughs] It's 4! Wait! Tides of Chaos!

2:10:09 Brennan: Gives you advantage, right?

2:10:10 Ally: Yeah.

2:10:11 Brennan: So you can roll, that's a d20 roll, yeah.

2:10:13 Ally: Okay. No! The same 4!

2:10:17 Zac: You can still call him, right?

2:10:20 Siobhan: Yeah, still call Alejandro.

2:10:21 Ally: Yeah, Alejandro, Alejandro, Alejandro.

2:10:24 Brennan: Cool. Go ahead and give me an initiative roll, if you'd be so kind.

2:10:26 Ally: Fucker, it's 3. Great. Oh my God.

2:10:29 Siobhan: That means he'll go soon.

2:10:30 Zac: He'll go in a few—

2:10:31 Ally: That's true. What the fuck is happening!

2:10:34 Emily: That is so—

2:10:35 Siobhan: You're rolling so badly today.

2:10:38 Ally: Truly.

2:10:39 Brennan: Give me a Wild Magic roll, Pete!

2:10:40 Ally: All right. 11, Cool. There's the 11 I needed for Blink.

2:10:47 Brennan: Cool. That's going to now be, this is one of those fights, I tell ya.

2:10:51 Ally: It's just one of those days...

2:10:54 Brennan: That's going to now be Kingston, that's you.

2:10:57 Ally: There's Limp Bizkit.

2:10:58 Lou: Is Sofia's paralysis magical in any way?

2:11:02 Brennan: It is magical.

2:11:03 Lou: Can I cast Dispel Magic?

2:11:04 Brennan: You absolutely can. [Emily gasps]

2:11:07 Brennan: It is a powerful stunning magic, so Dispel, I just want to make sure that I understand here real quick, because, let me look at, I just want to make sure that you are operating with the most information possible.

2:11:22 Lou: Thank you so much.

2:11:23 Brennan: You said I'm a bad DM, but the thing is that I'm not, I'm actually—

2:11:26 Lou: I never said you were a bad DM!

2:11:27 Siobhan: No, we're saying you're a bad person. It’s nothing about your DMing ability.

2:11:29 Brennan: Yes, no, I'm sorry, I didn't, that actually—

2:11:31 Murph: We don't like you personally.

2:11:32 Brennan: Yes, yes yes yes, for sure.

2:11:32 Siobhan: Truly a human-to-human.

2:11:34 Ally: But DM? Wow. Amazing.

2:11:35 Emily: It’s about you as a person not you professionally.

2:11:37 Brennan: I want to also point out that, if you have a slot to cast Dispel Magic, Lesser Restoration is touch.

2:11:43 Lou: Yes.

2:11:44 Brennan: But in other words, so I don't, yeah, I don't think you can--

2:11:48 Lou: I'd have to get all up in the business of the mech and the--

2:11:52 Brennan: Cool, so it is a, so go ahead, we're gonna do a Box of Doom roll again.

2:11:57 Emily: What would it be, 'cause maybe you might not want to be.

2:12:01 Lou: Yeah, what would it be?

2:12:04 Brennan: Go ahead and give me an Arcana check.

2:12:09 Lou: Okay. Okay. It's gonna be 11.

2:12:15 Brennan: The odds would be against you, but it wouldn't be impossible.

2:12:19 Lou: You're worth it. Let's play.