Rescue at Buzzybrook

0:00:19 Brennan: Welcome, one and all, to another exciting episode of "A Crown of Candy." I am your humble game master, Brennan Lee Mulligan. With me, as always, are our intrepid heroes. Say hi, intrepid heroes.

0:00:28 All: Hi, intrepid heroes.

0:00:30 Brennan: Oh, a clean one, oh, I love it!

0:00:31 Murph: Yeah.

0:00:33 Ally: We're not mad at you anymore.

0:00:35 Brennan: [cutely puts his hands under his chin] How about it?

0:00:36 Siobhan: No, I'm just mad at Emily.

0:00:36 Ally: Emily's back.

0:00:40 Brennan: [laughs] Incredible, we open our adventure here in an alpine village in the great Stone Candy Mountains. You have appeared in the center of a circle of stones in the Sweetening Path, hidden away from sight in this village. We have not rolled initiative yet because combat has not started yet. As you appear in the circle here, there's a (whooshing) little whiff of sweet smell, but no light or sound. There's some dull glow to the runes, but the runes are not glowing brilliantly, they're not casting light. There's (whooshing) a little bit of a slight glow. I would like Perception checks from all of you.

0:01:33 Siobhan: Can I roll with advantage 'cause I got Yak?

0:01:37 Brennan: Yes, you may.

0:01:39 Murph: I got a 21.

0:01:40 Siobhan: Oh, God.

0:01:41 Ally: 20 not nat.

0:01:41 Emily: 17.

0:01:42 Brennan: 20 not nat?

0:01:43 Zac: 20 not nat, as well.

0:01:44 Brennan: Okay, sharp Perception checks around you lets you know that you are, hold on one second.

0:01:50 Zac: I see a peppermint stool.

0:01:52 Brennan: Yes.

0:01:55 Lou: That's what you get.

0:01:56 Siobhan: The stones are glowing slightly—

0:01:57 Lou: You need to pick out what you see.

0:01:58 Emily: There's magic here. (laughs)

0:02:05 Brennan: You look around and see the burnt remains of the Village of Buzzybrook, high in the Great Stone Candy Mountains. Those who got a 20 peer through the cracks. First of all, you guys have a- Anyone that rolled a 20 or higher with a Perception check can react first, not surprised to the conditions. And you can also anticipate that I am about to ask you to make a Stealth check if you got a 20 or higher, because you need to remain extremely hidden as Ceresian soldiers with weapons drawn force Candian villagers into the town square.

0:02:43 Zac: Can you cast Pass Without Trace-

0:02:43 Ally: Yeah.

0:02:45 Brennan: Okay, you cast Pass Without Trace? I am going to need a group Stealth check, first and foremost.

0:02:54 Ally: Yeah, you all have plus 20 for this entire battle.

0:02:56 Emily: Plus 20?

0:02:56 Lou: Plus 20?

0:02:58 Ally: Oh, sorry, plus 10, sorry, I also have a plus 10. (overlapping chattering)

0:03:01 Ally: I don't even need to roll, right, if I have two plus 10s?

0:03:03 Murph: I got a 12.

0:03:04 Siobhan: 29.

0:03:05 Brennan: Unless it's a nat one.

0:03:05 Emily: I got a nat 1.

0:03:07 Murph: 18.

0:03:08 Zac: I got a 28.

0:03:09 Brennan: Let's go around, what'd you get?

0:03:10 Ally: 26.

0:03:10 Brennan: 26?

0:03:11 Murph: 12.

0:03:11 Brennan: 12.

0:03:14 Emily: Technically an 11?

0:03:16 Brennan: But a nat 1?

0:03:17 Emily: But a nat 1. (laughs)

0:03:18 Siobhan: A 29.

0:03:19 Lou: 21.

0:03:20 Zac: 28.

0:03:20 Brennan: Okay, so more than half of us beat 20s, so the group check passes, you are hidden in shadow—

0:03:28 Saccharina: Sorry, are we hiding?

0:03:33 Brennan: You look out through the slats of wood. This is an open circle of Sucrosi standing stones in the middle of Buzzybrook. The building that was built around it is a lovely little rustic wooden structure that is known sometimes as a sugar hut. It is effectively a thing that the people do up here to appease Bulbian missionaries who are like,

0:04:04 Bulbian Missionary: Oh, pagan standing stones in the middle of the town, this absolutely can't happen.

0:04:10 Brennan: And they're like,

0:04:10 Candian Villager: Oh, yeah, nothing but a sugar hut.

0:04:13 Brennan: And they just leave their standing stones in the middle of this wooden structure. So it's sort of a covert temple, although really only covert if you're passing through. If you know that it's there, it's open knowledge. You are standing in the middle of this and Caramelinda, who I assume is getting help actions from Theo and other people, is managing to hold onto the spell all right right now. It looks like she won't really have to start working in earnest until you guys sort of (snaps) move. You hear shouting in Ceresian, as they muscle the candy villagers forward. Anyone with a 20 or higher, tell me if you're trying to spot anything in particular. You obviously are very limited 'cause you're looking out through slats of wood and stuff, but is there anything you're looking for in particular?

0:04:59 Ally: I'm looking for what seems most important to them, like an area, maybe this hut over here, if it's being guarded.

0:05:05 Brennan: So first, yeah, first of all, the thing that's the most important is the gallows right in front of you. They're empty right now, but you see two Bulbian priests standing in front, two Bulbian paladins to either side and some Ceresian heralds blowing trumpets. It is pitch black everywhere, there are braziers of burning coals that cast light in about a 20 foot radius.

0:05:29 Siobhan: But it's dark right now?

0:05:30 Brennan: It's dark right now.

0:05:30 Siobhan: Oh, hell yeah.

0:05:32 Ally: Can we tell if people are using see in the dark?

0:05:34 Siobhan: Oh yeah, they have eye drops?

0:05:37 Brennan: No one got a nat 20, so I don't think you- You don't see eye shine, you don't see that little flicker of eye shine that would-

0:05:45 Ally: Can I do another roll to see if I nat 20, just-

0:05:48 Brennan: Give me a Nature check.

0:05:49 Ally: Oh, cool, I get pretty good on Nature, plus 7. 16.

0:05:58 Brennan: You don't think everyone has it. Some of them might, like these sort of Church crossbow priests in the back may. But other than that, what seems important is you just see a smattering of food here, and glint of gold back over here. Anyone else that got a 20 on that Perception check, let me know what you're looking for.

0:06:26 Murph: I guess I'm looking for any sign of Duke Jawbreaker and the rest of his family.

0:06:33 Brennan: Duke Jawbreaker, with a 20?

0:06:35 Murph: I think I got a 21.

0:06:36 Brennan: Oh 21? You see, the most likely places that you think are there are guards at this Commander's tent, this Ceresian commander's tent. There are guards at a little candy cottage that has not been burned over here and there is someone, you can't see through the tree, but there's somebody over there guarding at another far cottage.

0:07:01 Murph: Okay.

0:07:02 Ally: Is there anyone in this one?

0:07:04 Brennan: You can't see inside, there's a dull light. So the burned out buildings only have the light of the braziers being cast, the three cottages that remain standing have some flickering lights in them, but only dim candlelight.

0:07:20 Ally: Okay.

0:07:20 Murph: Okay, so it's possible they're being held prisoner in those buildings.

0:07:23 Lou: Alright.

0:07:26 Zac: I also got a 20.

0:07:26 Brennan: Yeah.

0:07:28 Zac: I'm just wondering, looking around, is there- Do I see anything that could be used as a distraction if I ever wanted to draw attention away from this hut?

0:07:41 Brennan: As a distraction? Anything you see on the board is there. You don't see anything that's an obvious distraction. You can hear a meep outside that's stabled next to a drinking trough of cola and anything you see is what it is that you're looking at. Do you know what I mean? If you see it on the board, that is what it is-

0:08:04 Murph: And we see people getting dragged to the gallows here?

0:08:09 Brennan: Not dragged, but what you actually see is they're not being- They're not manacled or enchained, but they are being marched to the town square, where they are being formed into a crowd.

0:08:21 Theobald: Well, I think we might be seeing your uncle in a moment.

0:08:25 Amethar: Should we hold out until it's a little bit more clear what's going on here?

0:08:29 Theobald: I think we know what's going on here. I think we should act quickly.

0:08:33 Ally: I have a question, and I don't know if you're gonna make me roll for the answer, but everything being guarded is being guarded by bread, from what I can see, except for this one, which has veggie. Does that mean that that's-

0:08:47 Brennan: You notice- That's a very sharp question to ask, and Liam, with that incredible dark vision, stares out into the night. Ceresian banner, Ceresian banner, not imperial. This is the banner of Ceresia, this is of the Imperator Ciabatta. Imperial banner of the Concord, banner of the Bulbian Church by that cottage.

0:09:10 Ally: Wow.

0:09:12 Murph: Okay.

0:09:13 Ally: Okay.

0:09:14 Lou: What do you think that means?

0:09:15 Siobhan: Is this the same french fry guy from the Church?

0:09:17 Brennan: Bonathan Flashfry? Absolutely.

0:09:17 Zac: Bonathan.

0:09:21 Emily: Wasn't he in my- Wasn’t he in my, like, fight?

0:09:21 Zac: Your fight?

0:09:25 Lou: Yeah.

0:09:25 Emily: I could have ended him there.

0:09:29 Murph: Okay, well-

0:09:30 Brennan: Anything more, and you're gonna have to get closer to check things out.

0:09:35 Murph: I think if there's-

0:09:37 Siobhan: The doors of this cottage are closed?

0:09:40 Brennan: Yes.

0:09:41 Siobhan: But are they locked, or are they just closed?

0:09:43 Brennan: They are locked from the outside.

0:09:47 Siobhan: Okay, I mean, I can- Can I pick this back lock over here?

0:09:53 Brennan: Normally you couldn't, but because you don't have to be on the same side of the door, you absolutely can.

0:10:00 Siobhan: Great.

0:10:00 Ally: Cool.

0:10:01 Brennan: And there's open slats in the boards, so you can literally put your thieves tools out through a slat, walk them around with your Mage Hand to the other side of the door and get to work.

0:10:11 Siobhan: Great, it's like an escape-

0:10:13 Brennan: These are shitting country locks. These are only a DC 15, these are farm locks. (ominous orchestral music)

0:10:20 Siobhan: I do not make a 15.

0:10:22 Emily: Can I give her help action?

0:10:23 Brennan: Yes, you can.

0:10:23 Siobhan: Great. I don't like this, but I'll take it. Okay, that one makes it.

0:10:30 Brennan: What does Saccharina do to give some arcane help in this instance?

0:10:35 Emily: I think I say,

0:10:35 Saccharina: I see you, little sister.

0:10:42 Brennan: Wild. Which door are you unlocking with-

0:10:48 Siobhan: The back one, not the front one.

0:10:49 Brennan: Okay, you're not trying to get into the crowd of people.

0:10:51 Siobhan: No, no, no.

0:10:52 Brennan: You (mimics picking a lock). Go ahead and give me a Stealth check.

0:10:55 Siobhan: Okay. It's so high, 25.

0:11:01 Brennan: Okay. The lock comes undone, and you manage to open that door without making a noise. Also, let me see if there's a brazier anywhere near there. The closest braziers near to you are by the doors of these cottages, but the light doesn't shed, so the back entrance of that is actually in darkness right now.

0:11:20 Siobhan: Great.

0:11:22 Zac: What is our plan?

0:11:24 Emily: Can I, I'd like to look at Caramelinda and just say,

0:11:29 Saccharina: I'd like to cast a spell on you, so I just wanted to get consent before I did that.

0:11:32 Ruby: Oh my god.

0:11:35 Liam: That's hot.

0:11:38 Caramelinda: Liam, you don't know what hot is.

0:11:39 Liam: I don't, and I don't wish to. I'm really just looking for love, romance.

0:11:46 Siobhan: I message to Liam,

0:11:46 Ruby: She sucks, right?

0:11:48 Liam: Yeah. Oh, sorry I said that out loud.

0:11:51 Brennan: You see that Caramelinda looks at you and says,

0:11:54 Caramelinda: Go for it, whatever you want to do to me.

0:11:57 Emily: I take out my Winterscoop and I cast Wall of Ice to make an ice dome around her to help her—

0:12:06 Brennan: Oh, awesome, how big of an ice dome are you creating?

0:12:10 Emily: I would like to-

0:12:10 Brennan: Like just personal, for her?

0:12:14 Emily: I think I'd like to maybe cast it over us all, or I cast it big enough that we could- No, pretty much just over her, I think.

0:12:21 Brennan: Cool, you ice her into a corner behind one of the standing stones and basically take a moment to sculpt it and create a personal little fortress for her, just to hold onto the spell.

0:12:33 Emily: Yeah.

0:12:33 Murph: Sweet.

0:12:34 Brennan: So you hear a muffled,

0:12:34 Caramelinda: It's cold as hell in here.

0:12:36 Saccharina: Ops!

0:12:38 Emily: I create a bonfire inside.

0:12:40 Caramelinda: (screams in pain)

0:12:42 Saccharina: Oop!

0:12:42 Emily: I put the bonfire out.

0:12:44 Caramelinda: It's good, it’s good, it’s good how it is, it's good how it is.

0:12:47 Emily: Can I Minor Illusion a sweater? (laughs)

0:12:52 Caramelinda: Not a big angora fan, but this is okay.

0:12:56 Brennan: You create the ice fortress, yeah, Caramelinda is protected with this wall of ice within the stones and the backdoor is open. For those that got a 20, you see those banners, as well. You can see that these guys are gearing up, the paladins go on either side, the priests are looking like they're about to begin speaking. Here's the thing, Caramelinda is gonna have to start concentrating very hard in a moment. You see, there's a lot more going on in this village than at first meets the eye. This appears to be a, like, victory meeting 'cause of all these banners flying here. The fact that there's an Imperial, Bulbian, and Ceresian banner all flying side by side means that a lot of resources have been gathered here. You see a commander's tent, you see some sort of golden glittering light over here. There's people over here as well, and there's whatever's in these cottages, as well. There appears to be, other than simply this gallows, quite a bit hidden away in the little town of Buzzybrook. With that, I'm gonna ask you guys what it is that you're going to do.

0:14:17 Ally: I want to run with this Stealth check or whatever to look into the window of this house right here.

0:14:25 Brennan: Okay, if you're going to leave and disappear into the darkness, you can't be seen in the dark. Are you saying anything before you go? Are you guys planning to coordinate anything-

0:14:37 Zac: We should check out all these little houses that we saw.

0:14:41 Ally: I have- I have the most-

0:14:42 Murph: Yes, why doesn't Liam go and look in the windows-

0:14:44 Ally: I can almost not be seen.

0:14:46 Siobhan: I can also because I have Darkvision.

0:14:46 Murph: All right.

0:14:50 Ally: Great, let's do it, you and I.

0:14:51 Siobhan: Like, if you go to that one I’ll go to this one.

0:14:52 Zac: Could both of you guys coordinate and just shoot this fry dude?

0:14:55 Ally: I- Yeah, honestly-

0:14:56 Emily: I think- Isn’t- We have a short time.

0:14:57 Murph: Let's not shoot anybody yet, let's look in the windows.

0:14:59 Ally: We're just gonna get Intelligence-

0:15:00 Murph: Let's look in the windows.

0:15:01 Ally: Okay.

0:15:01 Murph: Cool.

0:15:01 Liam: See you soon.

0:15:01 Ruby: Yeah.

0:15:01 Murph: Cool.

0:15:03 Brennan: Okay. It's gonna be per house, so go ahead and give me the first- As you guys slip out the back door, I'm gonna need Stealth checks from you each time. It's not a group Stealth check this time, so if one of you bombs out, you bomb out- Go ahead-

0:15:18 Siobhan: But I have Yak, right?

0:15:19 Brennan: You have Yak, giving you a help action.

0:15:21 Ally: And you have Pass Without a Trace.

0:15:22 Siobhan: And I have Pass-

0:15:23 Brennan: Pass without Trace.

0:15:25 Ally: Yeah, 39.

0:15:28 Siobhan: 30.

0:15:30 Brennan: [pointedly] Cool. (Siobhan laughs)

0:15:33 Brennan: Liam and Ruby vanish into the night. This is so fun, to do non-combat board interaction. Go ahead and—

0:15:42 Siobhan: Oh, I'm going to this one.

0:15:43 Brennan: Oh, you go to this one. You go over here, you go over here. I'm gonna get Yak for you, as well.

0:15:48 Siobhan: Thank you. My baby.

0:15:51 Brennan: If you- Also, are you- You're taking pains to avoid the light of those braziers, correct?

0:15:56 Siobhan: Yeah.

0:15:57 Brennan: Liam, you skulk through the burned-out house. Ruby, you light footedly sneak past this meep over to the side here. You are still 20 feet away from- Actually, you're gonna need to be a little- Like one further back to not- The light kind of comes right here. Both, you can kindly remove those roofs and hand them to me. (slow orchestral music)

0:16:20 Ally: The carrot! I think.

0:16:22 Brennan: No, not the carrot.

0:16:22 Murph: No, it’s not the carrot.

0:16:22 Ally: Okay, good, all right, false alarm.

0:16:25 Lou: That's the onion man.

0:16:26 Ally: Sorry for yelling.

0:16:26 Siobahn: Ah, that fucking onion man.

0:16:26 Lou: And then this is a-

0:16:27 Brennan: Go ahead and throw that back on that house, that right there.

0:16:27 Lou: Oh and this is Jet's former lover.

0:16:30 Siobhan: Oh, yes!

0:16:30 Emily: The avocado?

0:16:32 Lou: No, no.

0:16:32 Siobhan: (placing something on the set) Oh, this one here, I got it.

0:16:33 Ally: The Ceresian-

0:16:33 Lou: The Ceresian.

0:16:35 Siobhan: Yeah, the Ceresian captain guy and then there's somebody tied up. There's a-

0:16:36 Emily: [softly] Fuck!

0:16:38 Siobhan: Lady tied up, a blue lady?

0:16:40 Emily: Is it—

0:16:40 Ally: Plumbelina?

0:16:42 Zac: No—

0:16:44 Brennan: What you actually see back there- Go ahead and give me Perception checks, each of you.

0:16:47 Siobhan: Great.

0:16:51 Emily: But still-

0:16:52 Siobhan: 22.

0:16:52 Ally: 22.

0:16:54 Brennan: What's that?

0:16:54 Siobhan: 22.

0:16:54 Brennan: Incredible. Liam, you see the Archbishop Oliver Onionpatch, who you remember from the massacre, or the attempted massacre and the death of Lapin at the Cathedral of Saint Arugula. He is here tending to Church business, writing furiously (mimics writing), writing away in his little book with Bonathan Flashfry out at the front. Let me see, one second. You see, looking in the window, you see he is going over notes that show pictures of terrifying fucking monsters, alchemical constructions based on something that you never got to see in person. But it looks like the notes of something that's written partially in Ceresian, and you see schematics of constructs, war engines, things like the Archmage Lazuli was talking about back in her day, and even a little page that seems to have schematics for the creation of a liquid dagger.

0:18:07 Ally: Can I- Without being detected, cast Hunter's Mark on him?

0:18:14 Brennan: I'm gonna ask for another Stealth roll.

0:18:20 Ally: Hey, 19.

0:18:22 Murph: Well, plus 10.

0:18:23 Siobhan: Plus Pass Without Trace.

0:18:24 Ally: Oh, Stealth! Then 22, or 32, yeah.

0:18:30 Brennan: Your peppermint eyes here in the high mountains of your homeland gleam with a predatory hunger and you feel something bestial and primal within you. (growls) And the Archbishop is unaware that you have marked him as your prey.

0:18:49 Ally: Fuck vegetables.

0:18:51 Brennan: (laughs) Ruby. You gaze in to see Commander Constano Grissini speaking to a woman who is wearing loose green robes with Candian sort of spiritual paint and things on her body and green minty leaves growing from the side of her face.

0:19:19 Emily: Ah, Spearia!

0:19:22 Siobhan: I- Am I within 120 feet of Liam, or any- Or the candy hut?

0:19:28 Brennan: Within 120 feet of Liam? [measures] You are within 120 feet of Liam, absolutely.

0:19:34 Siobhan: I Message to Liam,

0:19:36 Ruby: Liam, I think your mom is in here.

0:19:40 Ally: I Message back everything that I saw to her, and I explain in detail these monsters or something that's in Ceresian.

0:19:46 Ruby: Oh, God, is that that Gristini guy? He seemed like a good guy, but I guess he’s- He looks- I don't like him.

0:19:51 Liam: That's gross.

0:19:54 Brennan: You recognize that Oliver Onionpatch is working off of the Primogen Alfredi's- That Ciabatta has passed along all of her notes to the Bulbian Church, and they have expanded on her work.

0:20:11 Siobhan: Can I Message to Theo all of that stuff?

0:20:16 Brennan: Yeah, through the slats of the church, you can Message all of that. You guys have that information now. You guys are also- You're in position there, hidden in the darkness. Those of you in the center there, what is it that you are doing while they're doing that?

0:20:29 Murph: I'm just waiting to pounce, but-

0:20:31 Lou: Yeah I think I’m- I think I've got eyes on the gallows, trying to make sure that I know, we understand what's happening there.

0:20:35 Murph: Yeah.

0:20:38 Emily: I have one question, if I cast Wall of Ice- If I cast a concentration spell from my staff, do I need to concentrate?

0:20:47 Brennan: You need to concentrate on it, yeah, absolutely.

0:20:49 Emily: Okay, then I guess I'm just continuing- I think right now I'm just in protecting Caramelinda mode, even though everyone's been really mean to me.

0:20:58 Brennan: You see that Gooey, who is here with you- So you also, your allies here, you have Gooey, Swifty, and Manta Ray Jack with you here. Gooey reaches out and just starts rubbing small circles on your shoulder and going,

0:21:10 Gooey: [quietly] Your Majesty, it's fucked up.

0:21:13 Saccharina: Yeah, they just really obviously talk out loud about me, as if I'm the mean girl just 'cause I talk this way, but they're behaving like the mean girls.

0:21:21 Gooey: Honestly-

0:21:22 Saccharina: Like even my own father is kind of behaving like a catty high schooler.

0:21:25 Amethar: What are you talking about? I said a nice- I said very nice things to you.

0:21:28 Saccharina: But you literally just had an interaction with Ruby where she said, “she sucks” and you're like, “I know”.

0:21:33 Amethar: She's my daughter, I have to be supportive. I love her very much, I support you, as well. I'm trying to support everybody. It's very hard to be a father. You know what, guys-

0:21:41 Theobald: There is a noose out there. Everyone be quiet.

0:21:45 Brennan: You see, Swifty looks around.

0:21:48 Theobald: [whispering] Don't do anything, Swifty.

0:21:48 Amethar: Shut the fuck up.

0:21:50 Swifty: Hurt people hurt people, that's all I'm saying, alright.

0:21:53 Amethar: Shh!

0:21:53 Theobald: Don’t-

0:21:53 Cumulous: Your voice really cuts through.

0:21:54 Swifty: What?

0:21:55 Saccharina: Okay, could everyone just stop cut- Like, criticizing everything about my people?

0:22:02 Swifty: Wow. Wow.

0:22:04 Cumulous: Understood.

0:22:05 Theobald: Alright.

0:22:05 Saccharina: Although I do kind of agree-

0:22:06 Theobald: Yes, okay, we can go in on Swifty and leave Gooey alone.

0:22:07 Ruby: Can I kill these people yet? (overlapping chattering)

0:22:10 Brennan: Oh, sorry-

0:22:11 Murph: I think I want to message back to Ruby, I guess, and say that maybe,

0:22:16 Theo: One of you come back and the other one check out the other house before the rest of us move? We're all gonna make a lot more noise than you all.

0:22:27 Zac: Lets- Yeah, let's figure out this last house-

0:22:29 Murph: Let's figure out this last house-

0:22:31 Ally: If I- If you Message me, can I Message back?

0:22:34 Siobhan: Yes.

0:22:34 Zac: If you have- Oh yeah.

0:22:36 Murph: No, even if you don't have it, yeah.

0:22:37 Siobhan: And yeah, if you have- It’s like a- You can reply back.

0:22:37 Lou: It's a channel.

0:22:39 Ally: Can I say,

0:22:39 Liam: I have a plan.

0:22:42 Zac: Can you say what the plan is?

0:22:43 Siobhan: Do you want to tell us what the plan is?

0:22:45 Ally: Yeah, okay,

0:22:45 Liam: You're gonna- Come here.

0:22:52 Ruby: Nobody can hear us, it's a message.

0:22:53 Liam: Come over to where I am.

0:22:54 Ruby: No, I can't, it’s like- There's lights in the way, and these guys will see me.

0:22:58 Liam: Fuck. I mean, it's a good plan.

0:23:00 Ruby: Tell me the plan! (Brennan sings) (upbeat fanfare music)

0:23:04 Brennan: Marching out from the Commander's tent in chains-

0:23:05 Ally: Oh my god!

0:23:06 Brennan: Duke Joren Jawbreaker is led to the noose by a Vegetanian knight and the priests begin reciting the charges against him and his last rites.

0:23:18 Amethar: Theobald, you message Liam and Jet, and you get- Figure out what they’re- Oh, Ruby, figure out what they’re gonna do.

0:23:24 Priest: For the crimes of treason, witchcraft, heresy-

0:23:29 Theobald: Liam, go check the house.

0:23:30 Liam: Okay.

0:23:30 Priest: Open war against the Concord of Calorum.

0:23:34 Ally: I cast Disguise Self on myself, and I become this onion, and I-

0:23:38 Brennan: Is Disguise Self also concentration?

0:23:41 Ally: I don't know, actually.

0:23:42 Siobhan: It's not.

0:23:43 Brennan: It's not? Okay. Cool.

0:23:43 Emily: I have a question, is his head in the noose?

0:23:46 Brennan: Yes, they have put that around him.

0:23:48 Emily: Can I just- Can I just attack the noose with Guiding Bolt to try and sever the noose?

0:23:56 Brennan: You, absolutely-

0:23:57 Ally: Well, that might be kinda obvious right?

0:23:59 Murph: That’s kind of the-

0:24:00 Emily: Otherwise he's going to get hung. They're literally reading his last rites.

0:24:03 Lou: We have a- I mean, I think we have the time.

0:24:03 Siobhan: Yeah, we have the time that it will take.

0:24:06 Murph: Let's go run and do this while he's getting his last rites.

0:24:09 Siobhan: He's got a big, beefy neck.

0:24:09 Brennan: Cool. I'm going to say, the positions you guys are in right now are the positions you're gonna begin in. You hear the noise,

0:24:21 Priest: Hereby sentence you to death. (tense orchestral music) [This is the beginning of the hanging content warning.]

0:24:26 Brennan: And you hear the noise of the trapdoor open, Joren drops.

0:24:29 Murph: Misty Step, I wanna grab-

0:24:31 Brennan: I'm gonna need everybody here to roll initiative.

0:24:34 Emily: Dude, that's why I said that.

0:24:35 Zac: Let’s reroll that-

0:24:37 Siobhan: Alright.

0:24:38 Ally: Oh, yeah.

0:24:39 Murph: 24.

0:24:40 Siobhan: 19.

0:24:41 Zac: Fucking hell.

0:24:42 Emily: 7.

0:24:43 Zac: 7, as well.

0:24:43 Ally: 19.

0:24:44 Siobhan: Oh my God, we're rolling the same today. We got those lockets.

0:24:49 Ally: Yeah, those lockets.

0:24:49 Siobhan: You’re my brother, Liam.

0:24:50 Ally: Yeah. (laughs) In twin speak.

0:24:52 Brennan: So here's the deal, you guys are gonna get a surprise round.

0:24:53 Murph: Oh sweet.

0:24:56 Siobhan: Sick.

0:24:56 Brennan: You- They do not know that you are here, so we're gonna go through initiative with all of them under the surprised condition, and y'all, you know, doing your thing.

0:25:03 Murph: Sweet.

0:25:06 Brennan: Cool, so let's go ahead and go around the table, what are your initiatives?

0:25:12 Ally: 19.

0:25:14 Brennan: Liam is a 19, great. What is Theo?

0:25:17 Murph: 24, Alert feat.

0:25:20 Siobhan: Sick.

0:25:21 Murph: Rolled a nat 19.

0:25:22 Emily: 7.

0:25:23 Brennan: Saccharina is 7. Ruby?

0:25:30 Siobhan: 19.

0:25:32 Brennan: Amethar?

0:25:33 Lou: Cinque, 5.

0:25:35 Brennan: Cumulous?

0:25:37 Zac: 7.

0:25:39 Brennan: Awesome, then I'm going to roll for, that's gonna be-

0:25:45 Lou: This is the part where Brennan does a bunch of math.

0:25:48 Brennan: Now I'm gonna do a bunch of math. You guys are welcome to talk if you want to talk, but I'm gonna do a bunch of math.

0:25:54 Murph: Cool. I could, I mean, I could hold, or do you think it's better- If I Misty Step, then at least I get in the mix, and he won't get-

0:26:01 Siobhan: Yeah.

0:26:02 Zac: Can you hold-

0:26:03 Murph: Oh, cause he’s really—

0:26:03 Siobhan: And he's a member of the Rocks family-

0:26:04 Zac: Are people- Is everyone going in there? Can we talk about that?

0:26:06 Lou: I mean-

0:26:08 Murph: I think it's just-

0:26:09 Zac: I think I would like to go in first, if you can hold your reaction for me.

0:26:12 Murph: Really?

0:26:13 Zac: Yeah.

0:26:14 Murph: Okay.

0:26:14 Zac: 'Cause I'm gonna scare a bunch of people.

0:26:15 Murph: So should we just hold- Is he gonna die? (laughs)

0:26:19 Siobhan: Not in the first turn.

0:26:19 Zac: Isn't he a barbarian?

0:26:22 Lou: Well, we have a surprise round.

0:26:22 Murph: Oh, it doesn't matter, we have a surprise round. So are you gonna fuck us up if we go before you?

0:26:29 Zac: Yeah.

0:26:30 Murph: Oh, okay.

0:26:30 Zac: If you were in the 30 foot radius, that I get to.

0:26:34 Murph: Oh.

0:26:34 Zac: So-

0:26:36 Murph: We could hold our turns until after you, if that's what-

0:26:38 Zac: If you're physically gonna be there-

0:26:39 Siobhan: I mean, it doesn't affect me, I can go before him.

0:26:41 Ally: I can do whatever, too, yeah, if we're over here.

0:26:43 Siobhan: It's just you, I think.

0:26:43 Lou: Do we just all have to make a fear check?

0:26:44 Ally: I mostly just wanna see what's in here, I think I'm gonna use my turn.

0:26:45 Murph: Okay.

0:26:46 Zac: If you're in 30 feet, you have to pass a DC 14 check.

0:26:51 Ally: Of what?

0:26:52 Zac: Wisdom.

0:26:53 Ally: What's 30 feet look like here? 5, 10, 15…

0:26:54 Zac: That is like (indicates 30 feet on the set).

0:26:55 Ally: Okay, yeah, yeah.

0:26:55 Zac: I bet it's like that. That's my guess, I don't know.

0:26:59 Ally: Okay, yeah, yeah, I should be fine if I go on this side.

0:27:01 Zac: 30 foot radius.

0:27:05 Siobhan: I'm so excited.

0:27:07 Lou: Do I go meet Grissini before he gets to the battlefield itself?

0:27:12 Emily: And these people are all-

0:27:13 Lou: 'Cause he gets a lot of bonus- He gets- He bumps a lot of- He bumps allies.

0:27:17 Murph: Yeah, those, I mean, I feel like Saccharina's gonna do a shit ton of damage to like these masses back here, so she's best served-

0:27:25 Emily: I was thinking that I would go- 'Cause these are all bad guys, right? We want to go after all of them.

0:27:28 Murph: Yeah.

0:27:29 Lou: Yep.

0:27:30 Zac: Are the people right there bad guys?

0:27:32 Ally: Not these candy people.

0:27:33 Murph: Not the candy people.

0:27:33 Ally: There's like a chocolate guy, and a jawbreaker-

0:27:35 Emily: Uh, I mean if they're here enjoying the gallows-

0:27:35 Murph: No they're getting like-

0:27:37 Zac: They're being forced to watch.

0:27:37 Siobhan: No, they were forced out. Yeah, they're the villagers who were dragged out to watch.

0:27:40 Murph: Yeah.

0:27:43 Lou: So you guys have got that, I'll go try and head off Gristini and fry guy?

0:27:46 Murph: I think that's a pretty good idea.

0:27:47 Lou: Great, ooh, let's go to fucking work.

0:27:50 Emily: So, but all these guys are bad, all the military guys are bad?

0:27:54 Murph: Oh, yeah, all those, it's they’re Ceresian- (overlapping chattering)

0:27:55 Siobhan: I'm so excited to finally use my rogue shit.

0:27:58 Lou: I'm real- I’m real low, so I'm going to be-

0:28:02 Siobhan: Yeah, I think it's only you that has to hold, 'cause you got a 7, right?

0:28:04 Lou: Which banner is over there? That's Ceresia? So there's a chance Ciabatta's in there.

0:28:07 Ally: Yeah.

0:28:07 Siobhan: In your initiative? So you're going on the same, at the same time as Zac, anyway, so it's just, you would have to hold an action.

0:28:14 Murph: I think it's, yeah-

0:28:14 Siobhan: To ready an action, 'cause me and Liam-

0:28:18 Murph: Are we worried at all that Jawbreaker would die during the surprise round at all? Should I just do it right away?

0:28:23 Lou: He would be too much of an asshole if he killed him during the surprise round, right?

0:28:27 Siobhan: There are also other people to save.

0:28:28 Emily: I don't think that they'll be able go- Won't we each- We'll each go to round? Oh, but like you're saying right after the surprise round-

0:28:33 Murph: 'Cause if I go at initiative 7 or something, he might-

0:28:36 Siobhan: I can also go get him, though.

0:28:37 Murph: But I can, too, I'm at 24. So the question is just can Cumulous still do his fear thing and leave me out of the way.

0:28:45 Emily: But I can get him and get out of there, is what I'm saying.

0:28:47 Murph: I can actually move.

0:28:49 Ally: Yeah-

0:28:49 Murph: ‘Cause Misty Step is just a bonus action.

0:28:50 Siobhan: Yeah, you can Misty Step and then move.

0:28:50 Zac: Yeah.

0:28:52 Murph: I can just get- Yeah, I can just move.

0:28:54 Emily: I was just gonna- 'Cause I have Thunder Step, so I was gonna literally use my whole action to get over there and then Thunder Step and bring him back and do some damage there.

0:29:04 Murph: I feel like you can do a fuck ton of damage, though.

0:29:07 Emily: I mean, with all these innocent bystanders, that kind of gets in the way of-

0:29:12 Murph: There's a bunch of dudes here.

0:29:14 Emily: Yeah, but my spells are area damage.

0:29:16 Murph: Okay, whatever you think.

0:29:17 Ally: A lot of innocent people, actually.

0:29:20 Emily: Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

0:29:21 Siobhan: But not behind the gallows-

0:29:22 Ally: Not behind, you gotta do gallows and behind, I guess.

0:29:25 Emily: Yeah, I'm just saying that I can do that.

0:29:28 Lou: What are you gonna order Gooey and Swifty to do?

0:29:31 Emily: Oh, I'll let them act on their own accord.

0:29:33 Siobhan: Oh yeah, did you- Right, yeah.

0:29:34 Emily: Yeah.

0:29:36 Zac: We also-

0:29:36 Emily: I'm not that kind of queen.

0:29:38 Murph: Would you rather Thunder Step, or would you rather do something else?

0:29:43 Emily: I think I'm just intimidated 'cause you keep saying how much damage I can do, and I don't know that- I don't know that I necessarily will live up to that precisely.

0:29:51 Murph: No, I'm just saying that I can't do damage-

0:29:52 Emily: 'Cause thunder damage is one of the- Thunder Step is one of the ways I would do damage.

0:29:54 Murph: The best I can hope for is to hit on two attacks, which is not very much damage.

0:29:59 Brennan: That's a lot of initiative. Incredible.

0:30:04 Siobhan: Do you have dark vision? No.

0:30:06 Lou: No.

0:30:08 Brennan: Joren snaps. The very first thing I'm gonna roll is a death saving throw for Joren, that's number one. We're gonna do Box of Doom for this.

0:30:23 Emily: Oh, 'cause he's, he's making saving throws.

0:30:26 Brennan: He's making saving throws, right out of the gate.

0:30:28 Murph: Great.

0:30:28 Emily: Well.

0:30:30 Lou: Now we know.

0:30:31 Brennan: Duke Joren Jawbreaker at the end of a noose. Liam, it's been a long time since you've seen your father, his thick, crystalline beard, cape, the jawbreaker mace. First death saving throw. 13, that’s a success. He goes unconscious and you see (imitates groaning) as his legs kick from underneath him. That is going to be first in the initiative order, that's going to be Theo.

0:31:04 Murph: Can I Misty Step to the gallows and cut the rope?

0:31:11 Brennan: Awesome, that's going to be- So you're gonna go- Grab you here, you're gonna do your movement to get to this last spot, is that within 30 feet? The answer is of course, why wouldn't you be that fortunate? That is exactly 30 feet.

0:31:21 Murph: Sweet.

0:31:31 Brennan: Princess flashes forward and appears at your side with you, go ahead and make an attack roll. It's very simple, the rope is AC 12, it's got 8 hit points.

0:31:44 Murph: Okay, sweet. Just in case, I'll have Princess help me. Princess, bite me and inspire me. Ooh, good thing I did that, I rolled a 1, but also a 23.

0:31:54 Brennan: Cool, she's gotta beat 12 hit points. I'm sorry, what did I say? 8 hit points.

0:31:58 Murph: Okay. I didn't do it, 7 damage. I have two attacks.

0:32:04 Brennan: There you go.

0:32:05 Murph: Alright.

0:32:06 Lou: Thank God.

0:32:07 Zac: Can you-

0:32:07 Murph: Oh wait.

0:32:07 Zac: Can you use a cantrip?

0:32:09 Murph: You know what, can I use my cantrip, my Green-Flame Blade?

0:32:11 Brennan: Yeah, absolutely.

0:32:12 Murph: Cool, so that would be another d8.

0:32:14 Brennan: Cool, although, actually, if you do that, you won't get your second attack.

0:32:18 Murph: Oh, I do, because of an Eldritch Knight thing.

0:32:22 Brennan: But it makes it a bonus action and you've used Misty Step.

0:32:24 Siobhan: No, Green Flame Blade is not a bonus action, it's an action.

0:32:27 Murph: That would be if I made a second attack.

0:32:29 Brennan: But war magic, which is your thing, let's you make a second attack as a bonus action.

0:32:32 Murph: Right. Got it. Brennan laughs evilly and sticks his tongue out at the camera.

0:32:34 Murph: I'm just going- I'm just gonna use Green Flame Blade and not do a second attack.

0:32:40 Brennan: Okay, cool.

0:32:41 Murph: So no matter what I do it, 'cause I did 7 damage, so-

0:32:43 Brennan: Great. As Joren drops, the trumpets blare. The priests smirk, (upbeat fanfare music) and in a flash of Sucrosi light, Sir Theobald Gumbar, the knight of North-Gumbia and Lord Commander of the Tartguard [yells] severs the rope and Joren drops through the trapdoor underneath the gallows. I mean, that's where, that's how that works.

0:33:05 Emily: It’s okay, I got him, I can do it.

0:33:07 Murph: Alright.

0:33:09 Brennan: Hell, yeah, that-

0:33:11 Murph: And then I'm going to use more of my movement and get- Fuck, where should I run?

0:33:18 Zac: Can you run that way, and-

0:33:19 Ally: Go down and—

0:33:19 Emily: You should get, is there—

0:33:20 Murph: Alright, I'm gonna run over to this house.

0:33:22 Emily: Yeah I think that's a good-

0:33:23 Brennan: Cool, you were here, so that was 5, 10...

0:33:25 Siobhan: No, that was a Misty Step.

0:33:25 Murph: That was Misty Step.

0:33:27 Brennan: You had to get to the doorway to be able to clear 30 feet.

0:33:29 Murph: Oh, got it, okay.

0:33:30 Brennan: So that's, that was 5, 10, 15. You got 15 feet of movement left.

0:33:34 Murph: Okay, 15 feet, whatever gets me closest to here.

0:33:37 Brennan: So you're gonna go-

0:33:38 Ally: Can you jump down into that hole, too? Then you'd have a little bit of cover.

0:33:41 Murph: Oh, should I just jump into the hole with him?

0:33:42 Emily: I-

0:33:42 Siobhan: Well, you're going to get Fear cast on you.

0:33:44 Zac: She can't get both of you out, yeah.

0:33:45 Murph: Okay, cool.

0:33:45 Emily: I can't get both of you out.

0:33:46 Brennan: Cool. And these veggie knights can't take reactions because they are surprised, can't imagine being more surprised than these guys are right now. That's a shocking thing to have happen. (laughs) Incredible, that is going to be- Grissini hears- You, Ruby, watch Grissini hear something outside. Can't take any actions 'cause he's surprised, but he comes out of the surprise condition, first person to know that something-

0:34:15 Siobhan: Yeah, he's alert.

0:34:17 Brennan: He's a very alert guy, yes. Liam, that is you.

0:34:23 Ally: Okay, I am going to- Fuck it. Okay, I'm gonna run up to the door. And what is- If I just wanna bump fry guy out of the way and enter the place, is that an opposed Athletics? Would that take my action?

0:34:48 Brennan: Would that take your action? You would have to use an attack getting him, you would have to use a shove to-

0:34:53 Ally: Even with my Stealth, there's no way to kind of sneak behind him into the door?

0:34:58 Brennan: In the- You wouldn't be in darkness, you would just be in the light.

0:35:03 Ally: Is he using anything on his eyes? 'Cause then I'm not, I can't be seen.

0:35:07 Brennan: No, but he's not using Darkvision. He's just next to a flaming brazier of coals.

0:35:12 Zac: Can you just kill that onion person through the window?

0:35:15 Siobhan: Yeah.

0:35:16 Emily: Oh, yeah.

0:35:16 Siobhan: Sneak Attack.

0:35:18 Brennan: I mean, yeah.

0:35:18 Siobhan: He don't know you're there.

0:35:19 Murph: Yeah, shoot him through the window!

0:35:20 Brennan: I'm trying to think of the- Of like, shooting through an unopened window.

0:35:23 Emily: You are an assassin.

0:35:25 Brennan: I would say, you're an assassin. I would say you just have disadvantage on the first attack, but you have advantage on all your attacks right now, so it would just be a straight roll, to adjust for firing through panes of glass, right?

0:35:39 Ally: Okay. So the total-

0:35:39 Brennan: Or-

0:35:41 Ally: Total, I get three attacks, can I just roll all three? Would they all be flat?

0:35:45 Brennan: Only the first one would get that disadvantage 'cause after the first one, you shatter the glass of the window.

0:35:47 Murph: Sweet.

0:35:50 Ally: Okay, cool.

0:35:51 Brennan: Go ahead and move, so you're- Which window are you firing through, there's one-

0:35:55 Ally: The one right in front of me, right here on the side.

0:35:57 Brennan: So you're literally looking him in the face and he can't see you because the interior of his window is reflecting his own candlelight that he's writing from.

0:36:04 Zac: Road to perdition. (overlapping chattering)

0:36:06 Lou: Damn, dog, this is Game of Thrones. [mimics writing and then getting shot in the head]

0:36:09 Siobhan: Oh, God, that's so scary.

0:36:12 Brennan: Yeah, you are a fucking spirit of the dark woods and move up with your crossbow, which you still have to name. And go ahead and move your figure up to the window.

0:36:23 Ally: Okay.

0:36:24 Brennan: You're hidden in the murky shadows on the other side of the corner from the brazier. Go ahead and make your first attack roll.

0:36:30 Ally: Okay, my first attack is a nat 1, holy shit.

0:36:37 Brennan: Oh, no. You shatter the window, miss horribly, and he is alerted to your presence. You get two other attacks.

0:36:47 Ally: Okay, the person guarding the door isn't alerted, right?

0:36:50 Brennan: He's alerted too, on a nat 1, he heard the glass shatter, as well.

0:36:53 Ally: Goddammit, okay, I take a dash as my Cunning Action.

0:36:59 Brennan: Okay.

0:37:00 Zac: Can you keep attacking, though?

0:37:01 Brennan: You do have two more attacks.

0:37:03 Murph: Just shoot this dude.

0:37:04 Siobhan: Yeah, shoot him, kill him, fuck him up.

0:37:07 Murph: It doesn't make any more difference, yeah.

0:37:09 Ally: Yeah, you're right, I thought that, wait, one second. Yeah, I just don't have any of my assassin advantage or anything to crit on this dude.

0:37:20 Brennan: You do still- Now you still do, you still have advantage because he hasn't acted, and you still auto crit because he's surprised. It's just that now you've made, your nat one, you've made a noise, you've alerted people, they know something's going on.

0:37:35 Ally: Oh, then yeah, definitely, okay. So two more attacks on him, that's one. (laughs) Nat 20.

0:37:43 Murph: Nat 20!

0:37:45 Ally: And then, yeah, 18 plus 10, that's 28.

0:37:48 Brennan: Truly insane, let's go, let's see.

0:37:53 Lou: Remember when we all used to cheer for nat 20s? Now it's expected.

0:37:55 Siobhan: Yeah.

0:37:56 Emily: I watched guys do that last battle and I got numb to them.

0:37:58 Brennan: Okay, so this is gonna be 2d10, plus 2d8, plus 4d6-

0:38:00 Siobhan: Jesus.

0:38:02 Brennan: Plus 7.

0:38:10 Ally: I think it's actually more than that 'cause I crit. I critted on both of them.

0:38:13 Brennan: This is already crit, you automatically crit-

0:38:16 Murph: As an assassin.

0:38:16 Brennan: As an assassin-

0:38:17 Ally: Yeah, so it's two crits, right? Those were different attacks.

0:38:19 Brennan: You can't- Oh, wait, no, every attack on this guy is a crit, no matter what.

0:38:25 Ally: Yeah, yeah.

0:38:26 Brennan: So you don't, you don’t add- You're already doubling your dice 'cause you're going-

0:38:30 Zac: So the nat 20 didn't mean anything.

0:38:32 Brennan: The nat 20 didn't actually mean anything this time because it's automatically a crit.

0:38:35 Ally: Yeah, yeah. But that would be- I'm rolling a d10 for the damage. I'm rolling a d8 and then I'm rolling for the Sneak Attack, right?

0:38:41 Brennan: 2d6, exactly, so that 1d10, plus 1d8, plus 2d6 becomes 2d10, plus 2d8, plus 4d6.

0:38:47 Murph: And you could do that twice.

0:38:48 Brennan: You could do, oh, yeah, so sorry. So actually it's 4d10, plus 4d8, plus 8d6, plus 14.

0:38:53 Murph: Let's do that all at the same time. Do you need some d10s?

0:38:56 Ally: Yeah, I got it, I got it all. I had already premeasured it.

0:39:00 Murph: That's for two attacks?

0:39:01 Ally: Yeah, so, and then I take one of those out, yeah-

0:39:03 Brennan: Oh, sorry, it's not 8d6, you only apply Sneak Attack once per turn.

0:39:05 Murph: Right.

0:39:07 Brennan: So it's 4d10 plus- And the d8 is only on one attack per Dread Ambusher. You're not gonna kill all my guys right away. So it's 4d10, plus 2d8, plus 4d6, plus 14, and that's a reasonable amount of damage.

0:39:24 Ally: Plus, sorry— (slow orchestral music)

0:39:25 Emily: This is like calculus.

0:39:25 Ally: Sorry, plus 4d6?

0:39:27 Brennan: Yeah, 4d6, 2d8, and 4d10.

0:39:30 Zac: I feel crazy listening to this.

0:39:31 Emily: I know, I-

0:39:32 Ally: And then this is plus-

0:39:34 Brennan: 14. [Ally rolls all of their dice, clattering]

0:39:36 Lou: [to the camera] You hear that?

0:39:37 Ally: That's right, so-

0:39:38 Lou: These are the sounds that Brennan normally makes.

0:39:40 Zac: [also to the camera] Did you hear that?

0:39:41 Lou: We're taking the power back.

0:39:42 Zac: We're asking if you heard.

0:39:44 Lou: [grinning, hand by his ear] Did you hear it, did you hear us?

0:39:45 Siobhan: That's the sound of winning.

0:39:48 Lou: PC's taking the power back, he's gonna kill all of us.

0:39:53 Ally: 20, 32, 40-

0:39:55 Lou: Pop this dude later.

0:39:58 Siobhan: Shit, man.

0:40:00 Ally: 52 plus 14 is.

0:40:00 Siobhan: Jesus Christ.

0:40:04 Brennan: 66 points of-

0:40:05 Ally: 66 points of damage, cool.

0:40:07 Siobhan: In one fucking-

0:40:08 Ally: And that's with a nat 1 leading me off. I could have fucking iced this guy.

0:40:13 Brennan: Liam, you walk up to the window, point your crossbow through and this guy gets alerted on the first one in time to get a crossbow bolt in the collarbone and another one deep in his gut as he falls ass backwards out of his chair, unable to see who just attacked him.

0:40:31 Emily: If you think about it, it's like now he's gonna die with Fear.

0:40:35 Ally: Yeah.

0:40:36 Emily: It's kind of nice that you alerted him.

0:40:37 Ally: It's better than a killing blow. Does the person guarding the door run in to meet him, since he probably knows someone is there?

0:40:42 Brennan: Not his turn yet, so you're not sure what he's gonna do.

0:40:44 Ally: Okay, okay.

0:40:45 Brennan: But you have a bonus action and movement left.

0:40:47 Ally: Great, I'm gonna run to this one.

0:40:49 Brennan: Okay, awesome, go ahead-

0:40:52 Ally: Oh, wait, he’s- I cast Hunter's Mark on him already.

0:40:56 Brennan: [defeated] Jesus.

0:40:56 Murph: Oh, and you crit.

0:40:57 Ally: Yeah, and I crit it.

0:40:57 Brennan: And you crit it. So Hunter's Mark is, what, an extra d6?

0:41:01 Ally: d8. Oh, no, you're right, d6, sorry.

0:41:05 Siobhan: On both attacks?

0:41:05 Brennan: Yeah.

0:41:06 Murph: So a 4d6?

0:41:08 Siobhan: And you crit? Yeah.

0:41:10 Emily: 66, plus-

0:41:12 Brennan: So that's a- So that's an extra 4d6 damage.

0:41:15 Siobhan: Jesus Christ.

0:41:15 Ally: Okay. Fuck yeah.

0:41:17 Murph: Alright.

0:41:19 Ally: Alright, that's an extra 18. Brennan, squeezing his eyes shut as if in pain, thunks a hand on the table.

0:41:22 Ally: So that's, yeah.

0:41:24 Brennan: [pressing his fingers into his eyes] This is one of my main guys!

0:41:27 Zac: 84, 84?

0:41:28 Ally: Fuck vegetables, 84 damage.

0:41:28 Siobhan: How does it feel, Brennan?

0:41:31 Brennan: It feels not good!

0:41:31 Siobhan: How does it fucking feel?

0:41:33 Brennan: Wait, how much- You did 84-

0:41:34 Ally: 84 total, right? If that's-

0:41:36 Zac: 'Cause if you said-

0:41:36 Brennan: 66 plus, what, how much-

0:41:38 Zac: 18?

0:41:39 Brennan: So 66 plus 18 is 84.

0:41:39 Murph: Jesus, Liam.

0:41:43 Ally: Sick.

0:41:43 Emily: Yeah.

0:41:43 Siobhan: Man!

0:41:45 Ally: Through a window.

0:41:46 Murph: Liam, imagine if you hit on your first attack.

0:41:48 Ally: Yeah, I mean, if it wasn't- If I had had advantage, it wouldn't have been a nat 1.

0:41:52 Brennan: Truly insane. Okay.

0:41:57 Ally: Is he down?

0:41:57 Brennan: He is not down, he is not down.

0:42:00 Ally: Whoa.

0:42:01 Brennan: He went from writing at his desk to shitting himself, covered in his own blood, screaming, in a horrifing- This is, you are not a warrior. This is a murder, this is a full murder.

0:42:10 Lou: That’s a war guy!

0:42:18 Emily: It’s an assassination, assassination.

0:42:20 Lou: A war guy. What's up, dude, we're the monsters now!

0:42:23 Siobhan: I message to Liam,

0:42:23 Ruby: Yes, bitch, yes! Absolutely, Liam.

0:42:27 Brennan: That's Liam's turn-

0:42:28 Murph: Since we have a surprise round, he's probably not gonna get to go until after your next thing, maybe?

0:42:33 Siobhan: Yeah, so you should kill him now.

0:42:34 Ally: Yeah.

0:42:35 Murph: Or maybe you should kill him.

0:42:36 Siobhan: Yeah.

0:42:37 Brennan: That actually is something that is true about Dread Ambusher, sorry about another rules moment. But the technical rules for Dread Ambusher are- Or, no, sorry, for Assassinate are that- Sorry, sorry, hold on. You have advantage against a creature that hasn't taken a turn in the combat and in addition, any hit you score against a creature that is surprised is a critical hit. So you wouldn't get that automatic crit against him, but you would get advantage on all your rolls against him if he doesn't act before your next turn. Something to think about. But what is Liam gonna do?

0:43:14 Ally: Let me see, I am going to hide, I guess? Is that something I can use as a bonus action-

0:43:20 Brennan: Yeah, you can bonus action hide, absolutely.

0:43:22 Ally: I'm gonna hide in this house, I think, just so I'm one step closer to figuring out what's in here.

0:43:27 Brennan: Cool, go ahead and use your movement, you have 30 feet of movement, so. Oh, hell, yeah, just go ahead and give me an Athletics to clamber up there.

0:43:34 Ally: Sure. 17.

0:43:39 Brennan: Hell, yeah, you just scramble up, fucking Batman style, slinking through this burned out building and crouch down like a sniper in the- This is like- You're just having an extreme Call of Duty moment over here. And you actually- I'm looking right through it. You have an exact- I can see his mini from where I am through the window.

0:43:58 Ally: So I can just shoot from there next turn.

0:44:00 Murph: What a nightmare.

0:44:01 Ally: Hell yeah.

0:44:02 Murph: What a fucking nightmare for him.

0:44:03 Ally: Hell yeah. Come on, onion bitch.

0:44:07 Lou: Yeah, you take away a boy's peppermint pig- (overlapping chattering)

0:44:10 Siobhan: I know you’re friends with that carrot.

0:44:12 Liam: Someone you know took my peppermint pig.

0:44:14 Brennan: Go ahead and give me another hide check, or a Stealth check.

0:44:16 Ally: Oh, sure, just not a nat one. Nat 20, making it a 40 Stealth check.

0:44:23 Murph: Unbelievable.

0:44:24 Brennan: Insane, Ruby-

0:44:25 Ally: Does 40 mean I'm just never found for the rest of the fight?

0:44:28 Brennan: You're fully invisible, you are a war ghost.

0:44:31 Ally: Fuck yeah.

0:44:33 Brennan: That's gonna be Ruby.

0:44:37 Siobhan: What's the light situation inside this-

0:44:40 Brennan: Lit by candles.

0:44:41 Siobhan: Okay. And can I tell from where I am that this ladder is like a little entrance into here?

0:44:49 Brennan: Into the attic? Yes.

0:44:50 Siobhan: Into the attic? And the attic is- But it's the same- I wouldn't have to open a trapdoor or anything to get from the attic down? Who knows, it's in the inside of this-

0:44:58 Brennan: Yeah.

0:45:00 Siobhan: Okay, here is what I would like to do. I would like to cast Jump on myself.

0:45:09 Brennan: Hell yeah.

0:45:11 Siobhan: And jump over to here.

0:45:13 Brennan: Dope.

0:45:15 Siobhan: And then sneak in this way.

0:45:19 Brennan: Awesome, you cast Jump as your action. You- No roll necessary, you spring, cat-like, to the roof. It takes your movement to get to the roof at the end of the ladder over there. You have a bonus action left.

0:45:36 Siobhan: Oh, what am I gonna do as my bonus action? (laughs) Am I- Can I get inside?

0:45:46 Brennan: You can take a dash action to get inside, yeah.

0:45:47 Siobhan: Great, oh, yeah, I'll do that.

0:45:49 Brennan: Go ahead and give me a Stealth roll.

0:45:50 Siobhan: Great. 30.

0:45:55 Brennan: You acrobatically leap, like one of the the Swirler Sisters, through the air, land on the opposite ladder, and slink through an open hatch into the attic, where you can hear Grissini beginning to bark orders to his men outside.

0:46:09 Siobhan: Great.

0:46:11 Brennan: Cool, go ahead and move your mini, and Yak, you are in the attic of that building over there. If you would like, actually, go ahead and throw Ruby onto that. Awesome, that's going to be Gooey and Swifty, who delay their action to accompany Saccharina. Then, hold on a moment.

0:46:37 Ruby: I'm gonna kill you, bitch.

0:46:39 Zac: Can I- we both have 7, right?

0:46:41 Emily: Yeah, I would like to go first.

0:46:41 Zac: Okay.

0:46:41 Emily: For your sake.

0:46:45 Zac: I can get out in my same move, but-

0:46:49 Emily: If you wanna do that, you can.

0:46:51 Zac: You go first, yeah, I just don't want those dudes to be in the mix when I-

0:46:56 Emily: What dudes?

0:46:57 Zac: The guys who are going on your turn, Swifty and-

0:46:59 Emily: No, I'm not gonna- 'Cause I don't want them in that area, either.

0:47:01 Zac: Cool.

0:47:04 Brennan: Okay, Manta Ray's taking his cue from Amethar, he delays. Caramelinda is concentrating on the spell. I'm gonna make roll for-

0:47:13 Emily: In her ice wall.

0:47:14 Brennan: In her ice wall, she's gonna roll with advantage 'cause of her cozy little ice cottage, her igloo.

0:47:18 Emily: Figured it would help her concentration.

0:47:20 Brennan: Yes, it gives her advantage on her concentration. The army starts shouting, they clearly see that something's going on, there's a shatter over there. Cumulous, that's you and Saccharina.

0:47:34 Zac: Saccharina, you can go first.

0:47:35 Emily: Yeah, I can go first.

0:47:36 Brennan: Saccharina, would you like your mini?

0:47:39 Emily: Yeah! Brennan hands Emily Saccharina’s mini. (group cheers)

0:47:42 Ally: That little artisanal wooden spoon!

0:47:46 Siobhan: Oh my goodness, beautiful.

0:47:46 Emily: Hell yeah!

0:47:46 Ally: That's sick.

0:47:47 Murph: She's pretty rad.

0:47:48 Emily: So I was with Caramelinda, so I'm probably right around here.

0:47:49 Brennan: Yep.

0:47:52 Emily: I want to- I want to run. I would like to- Okay, so with Tempestuous Magic, before I cast a first level or higher spell, I can fly 10 feet.

0:48:07 Brennan: Hell, yeah.

0:48:08 Emily: Can I like, run through this friendly crowd and then fly 10 feet over these people, 'cause I don't take opportunity attacks.

0:48:16 Brennan: You absolutely can, yes.

0:48:18 Emily: Okay, so I run here. I fly, fly over them, and then I cast- And then who all is within 10 feet of me?

0:48:29 Brennan: Joren Jawbreaker is down underneath the gallows and other than that, it's all these Vegetanians.

0:48:37 Emily: Okay, so what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna do a fourth level Thunder Step. I'm grabbing Joren to come with me.

0:48:44 Brennan: [realizing] You can pick one person to come with you.

0:48:46 Emily: Yes, I'm doing a fourth level Thunder Step— Brennan has a hand over his mouth.

0:48:48 Emily: And I'm also using my Channel Divinity, my Channel Divinity Destructive Wrath. So I'm just doing max damage, so they're all taking 40 points of damage, and then since I cast a lightning spell, they're also all gonna take another 3. And then I'm gonna use Quicken Spell to do Spare the Dying on Joren as I teleport him back in here. Brennan is frozen, staring at Emily with a hand at his mouth still. (players laughing)

0:49:16 Murph: Holy shit. Oh my god.

0:49:16 Siobhan: Fuck you up, Brennan. You read the rule book this time.

0:49:18 Murph: Yo.

0:49:19 Ally: Hell yeah.

0:49:24 Brennan: You did, what, you did-

0:49:26 Siobhan: 43-

0:49:27 Emily: 43 damage to everyone within 10 feet of me.

0:49:28 Siobhan: Everybody within 10 feet.

0:49:31 Brennan: And not to Joren Jawbreaker.

0:49:32 Emily: But not to Joren Jawbreaker because he's coming with me. And also, I spared him, so he's no longer dying. Brennan, hand still at his mouth but now in a ‘thinking’ pose, raises his eyebrows at Emily.

0:49:39 Murph: Everyone likes Saccharina now.

0:49:42 Brennan: Everyone likes Saccharina now! (laughs)

0:49:44 Murph: Theo- Theo pees a little bit.

0:49:50 Brennan: Um… [sighs] Yeah, yes, yeah. Yeah, for sure, yeah-

0:49:53 Ally: Fuck yeah, that's insane.

0:49:55 Brennan: Okay.

0:49:56 Zac: Did you just do max damage?

0:49:58 Emily: Yeah, once a day I can do max damage on lightning or thunder.

0:50:00 Zac: Uhhh!

0:50:02 Brennan: Okay, okay, so you-

0:50:02 Emily: It does max damage.

0:50:05 Brennan: You get the free- It's not even a bonus, it's just a free action that you go 10 feet flying.

0:50:08 Emily: Yep.

0:50:11 Brennan: You land, 43 damage-

0:50:13 Emily: 43 damage to everyone around me, 'cause-

0:50:15 Brennan: Is there a save for half, or there's-

0:50:17 Emily: Oh, yeah, there's a save for half.

0:50:18 Brennan: Okay, there's a save for half, okay, 43 and you- So let's resolve what can't- What I can't stop first. You fly, they're all, surprised, you know. But they don't get any opportunity on you coming because you're, specifically your ability says that, and then you're just grabbing Joren and disappearing back, you go back into this area here. He's prone-

0:50:43 Emily: I’m gonna put him into Amethar's arms and say,

0:50:46 Saccharina: I got your cousin. (Brennan laughs)

0:50:48 Amethar: Ohhh, ohh.

0:50:51 Brennan: And then 10 feet from here, so that's, that's them, that's- No, not that person, okay, over there.

0:51:01 Emily: Oh, I also have Wind Speaker, so I do speak to the wind as I do it.

0:51:06 Brennan: Okay.

0:51:07 Siobhan: Have a nice little conversation.

0:51:08 Brennan: Okay. 43 damage, you (snaps)- I'm gonna roll to see what happens to all of these people that I was- This person, even with half, nothing. Nothing, they can't survive. The rest-

0:51:31 Zac: See you. Bye.

0:51:32 Brennan: Bye.

0:51:32 Ally: Bye.

0:51:33 Zac: Bye!

0:51:34 Ally: Blows the trumpets.

0:51:37 Brennan: One, two.

0:51:39 Murph: That's insane.

0:51:39 Ally: Mhmm.

0:51:40 Brennan: Okay, so it's just the knights and these priests, really. So we're gonna go like this. Well, your DC is- For this spell, I believe it's 16.

0:51:51 Emily: For this spell, yes, my sorcerer DC.

0:51:54 Brennan: And what type of saving throw is it?

0:51:56 Emily: 16, it is a Constitution saving throw.

0:52:06 Brennan: Okay, so the one on the dais is going to make it.

0:52:12 Emily: They don't- They do all take the three damage, though, 'cause that's my sort of stormy aura.

0:52:17 Brennan: Gotcha, okay, so that's gonna be-

0:52:21 Emily: So on a save they'll still take 23.

0:52:23 Brennan: One, two, three. So that's gonna be 43, so that’s gonna be 23, 23 and then- Or, no, sorry, two of them take 43. And then this one takes 23. The two knights on either side of you- Okay, you know what, I'm not gonna narrate anything 'cause this is so, there's so much happening, and I'm ruined, um… I'm ruined.

0:52:57 Ally: I have a question.

0:52:59 Brennan: [defeated] Yeah, what's up? What's up, Ally?

0:53:00 Ally: I think I did Disguise Self to look like the onion before we started. So technically, did that onion person hear a window shatter and then they saw themselves ice them and then disappear?

0:53:13 Brennan: Correct.

0:53:14 Ally: Okay, I wasn't sure if that landed, that I did Disguise Self.

0:53:19 Brennan: That onion bishop had a full David Lynch movie- The camera briefly shows the onion bishop staring at himself through the window.

0:53:23 Emily: Maybe you should leave him alive 'cause he's gonna be insane now. He's gonna be scared of his own reflection.

0:53:30 Brennan: These priests need a 16 or higher, okay.

0:53:36 Murph: Unbelievable.

0:53:38 Ally: That's crazy.

0:53:41 Murph: I didn't know Thunder Step could do that much damage.

0:53:43 Ally: Same.

0:53:44 Emily: I did it at fourth level, so I added another d10, and I can do max—

0:53:48 Brennan: Okay, you- And you are back here now. Do you- What do you want Gooey and Swifty to do, if anything?

0:53:57 Emily: I think I'm gonna tell them to- I think I'm gonna tell- I feel like we should have someone- No, because the Wall of Ice already has an AC, so no one can attack Caramelinda. I think I'm gonna dispatch them to go with- Meet up with Theo.

0:54:14 Brennan: Okay, cool.

0:54:15 Emily: And explore that house.

0:54:17 Ally: Yeah, we need to find out what's in here, it's definitely Ciabatta.

0:54:20 Brennan: So they're gonna take a full double move, bustling through the crowd, Gooey's-

0:54:24 Emily: They could maybe attack these guys, if they- Unless they-

0:54:27 Brennan: Unfortunately, the crowd is not friendly. It's difficult terrain, so they have to use their whole movement to get all the way out here. And Swifty's gonna go with- Actually, no, Swifty's much faster. So Swifty's gonna scoot all the way over here into the darkness. So here's what you guys see. Saccharina strides to the door. You hear a crash of distant thunder. The entire- All the trees in town bend to almost 45 degrees, (imitates wind blowing) as candy is stripped off the roofs. The door rattles, and the lock on the other door busts open, as the door is taken off into the sky by the wind. Saccharina rises up and (imitates wind) is borne aloft by the wind, lands on the stage, reaches a hand into the gallows, and just summons Joren up into her hand. Lightning crashes from the sky. In a blinding flash of light, she is gone. These trumpeters are dead. Only this guy looks- This guy and the long neck celery priest look badly injured. This priest and the two knights to either side look dangling by the thinnest possible thread into life and you are gone, and Joren is stable. Oh my God. That is going to be Amethar's turn.

0:55:59 Zac: Oh, I think it's-

0:56:00 Brennan: Oh, sorry, Cumulous's.

0:56:00 Zac: Cumulous's. It kind of changes what I was thinking of doing in a good way.

0:56:04 Emily: Okay, okay.

0:56:09 Murph: 'Cause I could just wreck some dudes.

0:56:11 Zac: Yeah.

0:56:13 Emily: And Joren is spared-

0:56:15 Zac: Cumulous is going to- I don't, I mean-

0:56:18 Brennan: [to the camera] Yeah, if Emily Axford has spells, there's not a lot you can do.

0:56:23 Zac: I don't think Hour of Reaping is gonna be that helpful 'cause it's a DC 14 spell save, and they maybe won't be hurt. So I'm just- Cumulous is gonna run out the front door, land right here, jump up here-

0:56:36 Brennan: Cool, oh, right, you have Fluffwind, which gives you an insane jump speed. Right, there's not even an issue with this. So you rush out, leap right here. Awesome.

0:56:49 Zac: Is there a spot where I can be within five feet of three people?

0:56:53 Brennan: Within five feet of three people?

0:56:56 Zac: Right there?

0:56:57 Brennan: Right there, you can be within five feet.

0:56:57 Zac: I'm gonna use two- Well, actually, no, that actually doesn't do that much damage. I'm gonna punch this celery neck in the back of the head. Do I have advantage?

0:57:10 Brennan: No, you do not have advantage in this instance. It's fully lit, you're not attacking from being hidden.

0:57:17 Zac: Okay, first attack. (dramatic orchestral music)

0:57:22 Zac: That's gonna hit, 28.

0:57:24 Brennan: You hit, yes.

0:57:25 Zac: And I'm going to-

0:57:27 Brennan: Are you attacking unarmed, or with Fluffwind?

0:57:29 Zac: With the Fluffwind.

0:57:30 Brennan: Cool.

0:57:31 Zac: And so that's 1d8 plus 6, how injured does this person look? I'm trying to decide if I should Stunning Fist them.

0:57:39 Brennan: They look somewhat- Somewhat fucked up, for sure.

0:57:43 Emily: Also, if you stunned them on the first hit, then you can get advantage, right? On the next attack.

0:57:47 Brennan: Correct, yes.

0:57:48 Zac: I'll do that-

0:57:49 Emily: That's something I- it took me a while to learn in Unsleeping City.

0:57:51 Zac: 1d8, plus- I did 8 damage to them.

0:57:56 Brennan: Okay, it's a Con save to not be stunned, I believe, correct?

0:57:59 Zac: Yes, correct.

0:58:01 Brennan: Okay. He fails.

0:58:05 Zac: Okay.

0:58:06 Brennan: How much damage is that, sorry?

0:58:07 Zac: That was just eight.

0:58:08 Brennan: Okay, you get advantage on the next attack.

0:58:11 Murph: Come on, nat 20.

0:58:11 Ally: Crit.

0:58:15 Zac: It hits, but not a nat 20.

0:58:18 Brennan: How much is it?

0:58:19 Zac: It was a 20-

0:58:19 Lou: Too disappointing.

0:58:21 Zac: I haven't rolled the damage yet, but it was a 26 or something.

0:58:26 Brennan: Cool, yeah, absolutely. You do get 26, cool, and the first one was more than that?

0:58:32 Zac: First hit was a 19. I'm just talking about the attack roll.

0:58:37 Brennan: Oh, the attack roll, yes, yes, yes, cool, gotcha.

0:58:39 Zac: So first damage I did was 8, and then this is now 12.

0:58:46 Brennan: 12 more damage? Okay.

0:58:46 Zac: Yeah.

0:58:48 Ally: Hell yeah.

0:58:50 Brennan: Oh, Jesus, okay, also now on death's door.

0:58:54 Zac: Okay, I'll do, I'll use another Ki point and do- uh, yknow, uh— what am I trying to say?

0:59:03 Brennan: Flurry of Blows?

0:59:03 Zac: Flurry of Blows.

0:59:04 Brennan: Cool.

0:59:05 Zac: So I've used two by now, and it's still fucked up, so I got advantage, right?

0:59:10 Brennan: Correct, still stunned.

0:59:10 Zac: Okay. 19, rolled a 19, so-

0:59:13 Ally: Oh, so close.

0:59:15 Siobhan: Nice.

0:59:16 Zac: That would be just a d6 plus 5, so that's 6. I'm rolling like shit on these damage rolls. So that was 6 damage.

0:59:24 Brennan: You leap to the gallows after the thunder is gone and that red cotton candy swirl surrounds you, and you just stay floating, doing that anime style where you're throwing punches and hitting down so hard that you just remain floating in air, and shatter the skull and break the long neck of this celery priest.

0:59:50 Zac: Okay, and is-

0:59:51 Emily: Oh, is he dead?

0:59:52 Brennan: Dead.

0:59:53 Zac: Flurry of Blows, is that a bonus action?

0:59:55 Brennan: It is a bonus action.

0:59:56 Zac: Do I have any movement left?

0:59:57 Brennan: You’ve used your- You have, what is your speed?

1:00:00 Zac: 45.

1:00:01 Ally: Find out who's in this!

1:00:02 Brennan: 5, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, 35, 40. You have 5 feet of movement.

1:00:10 Zac: And I can't take any more bonus actions, I realize, I fucked up. But I had one more Flurry left, so I'm gonna punch this dude in the back of the head.

1:00:22 Brennan: Which guy? Kale, or this dude, or the knight?

1:00:27 Zac: The knight, I guess.

1:00:28 Brennan: Cool, go ahead and make an attack roll. And this is just, yeah, a normal attack.

1:00:33 Zac: That is a 20, not nat.

1:00:35 Brennan: 20 hits.

1:00:39 Zac: 7 damage.

1:00:41 Brennan: [without ceremony] You kick the back of his skull in and he dies.

1:00:43 Ally: What?!

1:00:44 Siobhan: Great.

1:00:46 Lou: My man is smashing skulls today.

1:00:48 Ally: Hell yeah.

1:00:49 Brennan: And as your foot reaches out and cleaves as a crescent kick and just puts a jagged fried edge of his helmet into his-

1:00:56 Zac: And I have 5 feet of movement left?

1:00:57 Brennan: 5 feet of movement left-

1:00:58 Zac: I'm diving into that hole.

1:01:00 Brennan: Oh, shit, yeah, you dive and disappear into the hole, blam.

1:01:04 Lou: Blam, baby, in the hole.

1:01:04 Zac: There we go.

1:01:06 Brennan: Amethar, that's gonna be you.

1:01:08 Lou: Great, Amethar's been watching everything drastically change and everyone do crazy shit, so he's-

1:01:15 Amethar: Hey, Monterrey? Manta Ray, sorry. Manta, hey, let's just- Let's do some crowd control.

1:01:21 Lou: And I step out, I'm just like,

1:01:21 Amethar: Hey. I'm former King Amethar, everybody in the sugar hut! [Brennan laughs incredulously]

1:01:30 Lou: And I say,

1:01:30 Amethar: Manta, you right, me left.

1:01:33 Lou: And I'm gonna go left and engage these guys.

1:01:36 Murph: Hell yeah.

1:01:37 Brennan: Hell yeah, you go left, so you're gonna first of all, go- So that's gonna be 5, 10, 15, 20. Are you gonna move-

1:01:48 Lou: I'm like,

1:01:48 Amethar: Excuse me, miss.

1:01:50 Brennan: Yeah. Do you want to get behind these guys?

1:01:52 Lou: I'd like to be behind, yeah.

1:01:53 Brennan: Cool, you use your movement to get right there and here's the mini for Manta Ray Jack! (group cheers)

1:01:59 Lou: Aw hell yeah.

1:02:01 Ally: That's really cute.

1:02:03 Brennan: There he is.

1:02:03 Ally: That's like Captain Crunch Spongebob.

1:02:04 Emily: Everyone remember, there was a Cruller mini at one point, don't trust them just 'cause there's a mini of them.

1:02:10 Ally: True.

1:02:10 Murph: I don't know, any mini's good.

1:02:13 Siobhan: I never trusted that cake.

1:02:13 Brennan: Cool, Manta Ray's gonna run over here. Amethar, go ahead and take your turn-

1:02:17 Lou: Great, yeah, I'll go into a rage and, well, let's just get to it, great, a 19.

1:02:26 Brennan: Hit.

1:02:27 Lou: Great, oh. Reroll ones, still a 1, 7 plus 9 equals 16.

1:02:39 Brennan: [mimes an axe impact] Dead.

1:02:40 Lou: Great, and then I'll use, I already used a bonus action to rage, and then we'll go after the other guy. 17 to hit?

1:02:49 Brennan: 17 to hit, hits.

1:02:53 Lou: Great, reroll twos, 10 plus 9, 19.

1:02:59 Brennan: [mimics Amethar’s attack] A spray of blood, as you howl at the Candians to get into the sugar hut. You go out, and every Ceresian you can get your hands on is dead the moment you come charging out of the sugar hut. Surprise rounds for eighth level characters… [to the camera] Take care with those, just be careful about those, is my only thing.

1:03:20 Siobhan: You set this up.

1:03:21 Brennan: I did set this up.

1:03:24 Lou: Come on, Manta.

1:03:29 Zac: What are you like, Manta Ray, what are you doing?

1:03:31 Siobhan: Yeah, what's your deal?

1:03:33 Brennan: Okay.

1:03:34 Siobhan: Is he a swashbuckler? [Faint sound of rattling dice]

1:03:34 Emily: Oh.

1:03:37 Siobhan: Is that a beautiful Stealth attack pile of dice?

1:03:43 Brennan: And 5 is 11. Which is the exact hit point total. You see that Manta Ray comes, sort of going out and says,

1:03:49 Manta Ray: I catch you on the other side, Amethar, and don't let your little high-born self get shown up!

1:03:55 Amethar: Oh, don't get us counting, Manta Ray.

1:03:57 Manta Ray: Alright.

1:03:59 Brennan: And you hear from the other side of the thing a Ceresian (yells), and you hear,

1:04:03 Manta Ray: One!

1:04:05 Amethar: Oh, I'm already on two.

1:04:06 Manta Ray: Oh, you're cheating.

1:04:06 Brennan: And yeah, Manta Ray skewers one of the Ceresian soldiers. That is Amethar. Joren is stable. Townsfolk- Yeah, these women grab their children and begin to rush, just pile into the sugar hut and begin to crowd around the doorway here, (slow orchestral music) fleeing as fast as they can. Okay, back to the top of the order, that's Theo.

1:04:39 Lou: Okay. (laughs)

1:04:40 Siobhan: Okay, alright.

1:04:41 Murph: All right, hey, we got a couple guys there, but I should see what's going on in this house. I'm gonna use my movement to go up to one of the windows, see what's going on.

1:04:51 Brennan: Go up to one of the windows, okay, cool. So you're gonna go up to one of the windows-

1:04:56 Siobhan: Can you not see from where you are-

1:04:57 Murph: Oh, yeah, can I see anything, or?

1:05:00 Brennan: Go ahead and give me a Perception check.

1:05:05 Murph: No, 7.

1:05:07 Brennan: Dimly lit, you see some shapes in there. That's about the best you can do.

1:05:10 Murph: Okay, I guess I'll run up to the-

1:05:13 Brennan: Run up to the window?

1:05:14 Murph: Yeah, or should I go to the door? Where's the door?

1:05:18 Brennan: The door's right here. You could just run up to the door.

1:05:19 Murph: Oh, yeah, I'm just gonna run and kick the door in.

1:05:21 Brennan: Okay, give me Athletics.

1:05:23 Murph: Sweet. A 14.

1:05:27 Lou: Love that thud.

1:05:28 Brennan: Bam, door flies off its hinges-

1:05:30 Lou: It's my guy, right there.

1:05:31 Brennan: You're gonna get an attack with opportunity from this knight right here as you leave-

1:05:34 Lou: Please, please.

1:05:34 Brennan: -the threatened range. Does a- A 16 does not-

1:05:41 Lou: No, of course not.

1:05:43 Brennan: Cling off your armor.

1:05:44 Theobald: You're all under arrest by the true king of Candia. (Brennan laughs)

1:05:47 Amethar: Queen!

1:05:48 Theobald: And the queen, it's all very confusing. There are two queens.

1:05:50 Amethar: No, it's just one, I'm not a guy anymore.

1:05:53 Theobald: You're also the king.

1:05:54 Ally: The king and queen are dad and daughter? Who is it?

1:05:57 Brennan: You see an armory full of weapons.

1:06:01 Murph: Wow! And just a dude?

1:06:02 Brennan: And just one guy. (laughs)

1:06:03 Murph: Oh, goddammit.

1:06:03 Theobald: Guys, this house sucks. There's nothing in it.

1:06:06 Liam: What the fuck? This house sucks!

1:06:07 Zac: [pointing] Those weapons look sick.

1:06:08 Siobhan: Those weapons really look sick. (overlapping chattering)

1:06:09 Brennan: You see you rush in and there's a Ceresian soldier who just- The Ceresian soldier just goes. (screams)

1:06:14 Theobald: Fuck you!

1:06:14 Murph: And I try to kill him.

1:06:16 Amethar: Remember that the marauders have trash weapons!

1:06:19 Zac: Those weapons look sick, dude.

1:06:20 Murph: Yeah, they might be sick.

1:06:21 Ruby: They might be those-

1:06:22 Zac: They all look sick, they all look-

1:06:24 Murph: Do they look sick?

1:06:25 Brennan: They look like some fucking sick Candian weapons.

1:06:26 Murph: Alright,

1:06:27 Theobald: Guys, it's actually pretty sick in here.

1:06:30 Liam: What? I thought it sucked!

1:06:31 Saccharina: Get into the looting spirit.

1:06:31 Theobald: I'm wrong.

1:06:33 Saccharina: See, looting is fun.

1:06:34 Murph: Okay, I'm going to, Green Flame Blade, and then I'm gonna use- Princess is gonna help me make an attack. That is a 26 to hit.

1:06:45 Lou: Why does it take so long for-

1:06:46 Brennan: You hit.

1:06:48 Murph: And then-

1:06:49 Lou: His dice always spin for a really long time.

1:06:51 Murph: Oh, boy, that's only 9 damage.

1:06:55 Brennan: 9, okay, 9 damage, still standing.

1:06:58 Murph: Alright, make my second attack with a bonus action. Nat 20. (group cheers)

1:07:02 Murph: Alright.

1:07:06 Zac: Oh, that's our guy.

1:07:07 Ally: Crit crew, crit crew.

1:07:07 Lou: That's our guy right there.

1:07:09 Siobhan: Crit crew.

1:07:09 Murph: Another 12 damage.

1:07:11 Siobhan: K-R-I-T.

1:07:12 Brennan: You bust the door in, see one guy who screams.

1:07:14 Theobald: Fuck you, dude.

1:07:15 Brennan: You smash him up against the wall with Swirlwarden and just feel the end of the Battlepop scrape the wall, pushing through his body against the backside.

1:07:27 Lou: Jesus, Theo!

1:07:27 Brennan: He falls immediately dead to the ground. Cool, you've used 20 feet of movement and your bonus action.

1:07:35 Murph: How sick is- How sick are these weapons?

1:07:38 Brennan: You wouldn't be able to tell what they were in the heat of battle, but-

1:07:42 Murph: Can I grab- Just grab- (mimics grabbing weapons)

1:07:43 Brennan: You just want to grab a big heaping helping of weapons?

1:07:46 Murph: I would like to grab a big heaping helping of weapons.

1:07:48 Emily: I did send my people to help.

1:07:51 Brennan: Oh, that's right, on your initiative.

1:07:52 Siobhan: Oh yeah, Swifty's right there.

1:07:53 Murph: Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah if they were-

1:07:54 Brennan: You see, yeah, Swifty and Gooey-

1:07:57 Emily: Don't they have advantage on looting?

1:08:00 Brennan: Swifty and Gooey both run in, look at this, and Swifty says,

1:08:02 Swifty: Oh, my little ginger balls, look at this!

1:08:08 Brennan: And you see that Gooey goes,

1:08:08 Gooey: We got it.

1:08:10 Theobald: Alright. (Emily laughs)

1:08:13 Brennan: You see that Swifty just starts going, pew, pew, pew, rushing back and forth with little weapons and pieces of treasure in his arms.

1:08:20 Theobald: Swifty, I love your enthusiasm.

1:08:23 Swifty: Ha ha, I wanna get rich!

1:08:28 Brennan: You see-

1:08:28 Theobald: Yes, with honor and diligence, and we want to protect our queen.

1:08:34 Swifty: No, fuck that!

1:08:35 Theobald: What?

1:08:38 Brennan: Cool, that's Theo. Grissini.

1:08:43 Siobhan: Shit!

1:08:45 Brennan: Goes-

1:08:45 Siobhan: Fuck.

1:08:47 Brennan: 5.

1:08:50 Siobhan: Oh, he's leaving the hut?

1:08:50 Brennan: 10, 15, 20.

1:08:53 Siobhan: 'Cause he doesn't know I'm here?

1:08:54 Brennan: 30.

1:08:55 Siobhan: Oh, good.

1:08:58 Brennan: Grissini barks an order to those two guards right there. Goes 30, and then-

1:09:08 Ally: Do you speak Ceresian?

1:09:13 Siobhan: [shaking her head] But I can understand that he's telling them to do something.

1:09:18 Brennan: Yes, he says something, you don't speak Ceresian, but he says something to them in Ceresian, and then he's gonna-

1:09:22 Zac: What two guards?

1:09:23 Murph: Probably the two dudes right there.

1:09:25 Zac: Oh, I didn't realize, there's two guys right here?

1:09:28 Murph: Yeah.

1:09:29 Lou: Oh, does he not make it to me?

1:09:30 Brennan: He does not make it to you. (Lou laughs)

1:09:36 Brennan: That is gonna be Constano, grant an ally within— does he have an ally within 30 feet?

1:09:46 Siobhan: Is that meep an ally?

1:09:48 Lou: Him and that meep.

1:09:52 Brennan: [sucks in a breath] Oh, Constano, your situation was better a moment ago.

1:09:56 Lou: Sorry, they're dead, Constano.

1:10:00 Siobhan: I mean, he made my life much easier.

1:10:04 Brennan: [laughs] That is gonna be Constano's turn, that's gonna be Liam.

1:10:12 Ally: So I still have advantage 'cause these people haven't acted yet.

1:10:15 Brennan: You still have advantage, it's not an auto crit anymore.

1:10:19 Ally: Really?

1:10:20 Brennan: It's not an auto crit 'cause he's not surprised anymore, but you do have advantage, also, you're attacking from being completely invisible.

1:10:25 Murph: If he hasn't acted yet, doesn't he-

1:10:26 Ally: Yeah, he hasn't acted yet, so it's like if-

1:10:28 Brennan: Surprise ends at the end of the first round. Notice that the wording is different in Dread Ambusher, you get- Or the wording is different with Assassinate.

1:10:35 Murph: Oh, it's just surprise. Got it.

1:10:37 Brennan: Right? So you get the auto crit for surprise. You get the advantage for having taken an action-

1:10:42 Ally: Oh, got you, okay, cool, cool, cool.

1:10:43 Brennan: No worries.

1:10:43 Murph: Just shoot him in the head.

1:10:44 Ally: Okay, great, I'll still, yeah. I think I'll- I am going to, first, yeah, attack him.

1:10:51 Brennan: Okay.

1:10:52 Zac: [realizing] Oh, okay.

1:10:54 Ally: What?

1:10:55 Zac: No, no, just-

1:10:55 Brennan: Go for it, yeah.

1:10:58 Ally: Ooh, 15 to hit?

1:11:01 Brennan: 15 to hit is not gonna do it.

1:11:02 Ally: Okay, cool.

1:11:05 Brennan: So that's your first attack. You can go ahead and roll your second attack.

1:11:07 Ally: Cool, so my second attack. 25 to hit.

1:11:12 Brennan: 25 hits.

1:11:13 Ally: Okay.

1:11:14 Brennan: And this is gonna be 1d10, plus 3d6 for Hunter's Mark and Sneak Attack, and not plus 1d8. So it's just 1d10 plus 3d6 plus 7.

1:11:26 Ally: Got it. Great, that's 16 plus 7, is 20—

1:11:34 Zac: 3?.

1:11:37 Ally: 3.

1:11:41 Brennan: Truly one of the scions of the Church is hit with another arrow, screams in pain, and begins to hobble to his feet, he looks so near death.

1:11:53 Ally: Okay. Let me see and I don't get another attack, right?

1:11:59 Brennan: You don't get another attack.

1:12:00 Ally: First turn, oh, yeah, it's just my first turn where I get that?

1:12:02 Brennan: Mm-hmm.

1:12:03 Ally: Okay, cool, then I am going to yell in Bulbosi, which I'm fluent in,

1:12:12 Liam: You have made a big mistake.

1:12:18 Brennan: [laughs] He screams and says,

1:12:18 Onionpatch: [pained yelling] Bulb above, the demons at the door, the spirits of darkness have come to claim me! The Hungry One!

1:12:30 Brennan: Yeah.

1:12:30 Ally: Then, no, I'm gonna stay where I'm at. I'm gonna hide, though.

1:12:33 Brennan: Cool, give me a bonus action to hide.

1:12:35 Ally: Oh, sure. 28.

1:12:41 Brennan: Cool, still a fucking shadow, no shot. Okay. That is Liam, Ruby, that's you.

1:12:50 Siobhan: Okay, I'd like to jump down, free Liam's mom.

1:13:00 Brennan: Hell yeah.

1:13:01 Siobhan: Is that a full action to-

1:13:02 Brennan: That's a bonus action to free Liam's mom.

1:13:03 Siobhan: Great, and then I would like to cast Invisibility on Liam's mom.

1:13:10 Brennan: Cool, go ahead and give me, first of all, a thieves tool check, and this is bonus action with Mage Hand.

1:13:13 Siobhan: 9.

1:13:17 Brennan: 9 is not gonna do it, so you can try again, but with another action.

1:13:20 Siobhan: Okay.

1:13:22 Murph: Do you have your-

1:13:23 Siobhan: Oh, I have Yak.

1:13:24 Brennan: Oh, he can give you advantage on that roll.

1:13:26 Siobhan: Great.

1:13:26 Brennan: Yeah, absolutely.

1:13:27 Siobhan: Okay, that does it, that's 25.

1:13:29 Brennan: You leap down, Mage Hand the lock open as you're casting Invisibility on her.

1:13:32 Siobhan: Great.

1:13:35 Brennan: She looks at you and goes, she's got her hands up, tied up, and she goes,

1:13:39 Spearia: [gentle, Midwestern] Oh my God, look at you. You're so- a little precious, are you gonna rescue me? Ruby nods.

1:13:47 Emily: Oh my God, no.

1:13:49 Spearia: I'm Spearia, and I think I actually know who you— Ruby puts a finger over her lips.

1:13:51 Spearia: Oh, okay, yeah, let's keep it. We're gonna keep it real quiet, shush, shush, shush. Ruby nods.

1:13:56 Emily: Oh, no, (laughs) when you described her, she was like the coolest looking person in the world.

1:14:03 Ally: And now she's like Cafe Gratitude waitress.

1:14:07 Spearia: You guys, I love it, honestly, all right. Let's do this, let's get out of here.

1:14:09 Ally: Oh, no.

1:14:12 Emily: No! (laughs)

1:14:12 Ally: Oh no.

1:14:15 Siobhan: So that's my action and my bonus action.

1:14:16 Emily: I guess that's how you guys felt when you met me.

1:14:20 Brennan: Oh, that's your action, the bonus action. That's your movement to get down there, hell, yeah. That's Ruby, Spearia is invisible. Go ahead and give me a Stealth check, just from the outside.

1:14:32 Siobhan: Great. 31. Lou makes a dunking motion.

1:14:37 Brennan: Great. Lou pulls both fists down in a ‘victory’ motion, making ‘bow’ noises.

1:14:41 Siobhan: I'm a ghost. And now I know these guys are gonna be low hit points, which is nice, that's nice.

1:14:46 Lou: (in an Italian accent) That’s-a nice.

1:14:48 Brennan: This guy's going to go-

1:14:51 Emily: Those guards have, these guys have low hit points?

1:14:54 Siobhan: Yeah, it's like 15-

1:14:54 Zac: It's like 11.

1:14:55 Siobhan: Or 16 or something, or 11?

1:14:55 Emily: Interesting.

1:14:57 Brennan: He's gonna rush back over here, and he's- What's he gonna do? He's gonna heal himself, that's what he's gonna do.

1:15:04 Emily: Who, wait, where did he go?

1:15:05 Brennan: This guy.

1:15:05 Murph: He ran back.

1:15:07 Lou: Little priesty, little priesty guy.

1:15:09 Siobhan: Little kale priest.

1:15:10 Ally: I think we gotta go into that military tent.

1:15:13 Zac: I’d like to know what’s in there.

1:15:14 Lou: This is 100% gone from “hey, we don't have to kill them all”, to “hey, why not?”

1:15:18 Siobhan: Let's fucking kill them all.

1:15:20 Lou: Why not?

1:15:21 Siobhan: Pokemon, gotta kill ‘em all.

1:15:22 Murph: There could still be a fucking monster or something.

1:15:24 Lou: Yeah.

1:15:25 Zac: No, I mean, a whole army could come up.

1:15:28 Brennan: You see that Grissini, as he's running towards you, Amethar, puts two fingers in his mouth and does a loud, that loud, piercing whistle. (whistle echoes)

1:15:38 Emily: Bless. He was blessing his folk?

1:15:40 Ally: Maybe.

1:15:42 Zac: Or calling more people.

1:15:42 Siobhan: Or calling more people, yeah.

1:15:45 Lou: Yup. Jk, jk, jk.

1:15:47 Ally: Or whoever's in that fucking tent.

1:15:50 Siobhan: Yeah, who is in the tent? What's in the box?

1:15:53 Ally: What's in the box?

1:15:54 Brennan: That is going to be, Caramelinda's gonna roll again. Concentration. Ooh boy, okay, now, finally, these guys go. (slow ambient music)

1:16:07 Brennan: This guy's gonna go, 30, 35, 40, 45, 50-

1:16:14 Siobhan: Bye bitch.

1:16:17 Brennan: 55, 60, rush up here. This guy runs over here.

1:16:25 Lou: Throw the fire.

1:16:27 Zac: What is that?

1:16:28 Lou: It's got a little flame thing.

1:16:29 Siobhan: Yeah.

1:16:30 Emily: Oh.

1:16:34 Lou: Ruby? Siobhan shakes her head. (overlapping chattering)

1:16:35 Brennan: Can you go ahead and place that—

1:16:37 Zac: It's a signal fire? [burning noises]

1:16:38 Lou: Yeah.

1:16:40 Zac: Does that tell them if—

1:16:41 Brennan: Yes, he rushes over to that. [about Lou placing the fire mini] Yeah, you had it, I think you had it right the first time, yeah.

1:16:50 Lou: You sure it's not like this?

1:16:51 Siobhan: Yeah, what about [mimics throwing the fire away] this?

1:16:52 Lou: Yeah, what about, sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

1:16:56 Brennan: There you go, perfect.

1:16:57 Lou: This is what happens when you get me-

1:16:58 Ally: It's 3am, Lou, 3.

1:16:58 Brennan: You see, he runs over, lights- Takes a torch from the brazier, lights that fire, and a huge (imitates whooshing) signal beacon is lit in the town.

1:17:04 Siobhan: Fuck.

1:17:09 Emily: Signal beacon.

1:17:12 Ally: If-

1:17:13 Emily: So maybe it's pointless to even try to put it out 'cause someone's already-

1:17:17 Siobhan: It's probably too late, yeah, we'll see, but yeah.

1:17:21 Brennan: Okay, these guys are gonna rush up. One, two, three. (players laughing)

1:17:35 Siobhan: I'm tiny.

1:17:36 Zac: Hang on, wait, I have a-

1:17:40 Theobald: Cumulous, you alright back there?

1:17:41 Cumulous: I- Wait.

1:17:45 Brennan: One, that knight is dead, so we're gonna go 5, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, 35, 40, 45, 50, 55, 60. These guys are gonna run over here for Manta Ray, and turn around for him, as well. First of all, that knight's gonna take a swing for you, Theo, it's a miss. That's a miss as well. We're gonna go ahead.

1:18:14 Murph: Oh god.

1:18:19 Brennan: These guys are all gonna take some swings at-

1:18:22 Zac: Are they- The archer dudes?

1:18:24 Brennan: The archer dudes, yeah.

1:18:25 Zac: Are they swinging at me or shooting at me?

1:18:26 Brennan: Shooting at you.

1:18:27 Zac: Okay, I'm gonna Deflect Arrows on the first one.

1:18:30 Brennan: Yes, first thing that's gonna happen, this guy's gonna take some swings. Two misses, guys- NPCs, we can't be getting misses on these attacks.

1:18:41 Zac: Or can we? I feel like we can.

1:18:45 Murph: We had a funeral last episode, we need a win. (Brennan laughs)

1:18:49 Lou: Big win.

1:18:54 Brennan: Okay, that is two hits.

1:18:58 Zac: With the arrows?

1:19:01 Brennan: With the arrows, yes, so the first one deals you 11, 17, 19 points of damage.

1:19:11 Zac: 19 plus 13, okay, so 13. So I blocked it for 19.

1:19:21 Brennan: Which means you get to throw it back-

1:19:22 Zac: I can throw it back at his-

1:19:24 Brennan: At his face, that's correct, as a reaction?

1:19:26 Zac: So that would be, just roll an attack roll?

1:19:29 Brennan: Yeah, that's correct.

1:19:31 Zac: That's only a- And what would I add to it?

1:19:35 Brennan: AC 12, so you need to-

1:19:35 Zac: Yeah, I didn't hit it.

1:19:37 Brennan: Okay, no worries, you fling the arrow. The next one is gonna hit you for 11, 14 plus 2 is 16 points of damage.

1:19:45 Zac: And I can't deflect it-

1:19:47 Brennan: Can't deflect that one, you've already used your reaction.

1:19:49 Zac: Okay, 16.

1:19:51 Brennan: 16, these guys are gonna 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10. (dramatic orchestral music)

1:20:00 Brennan: This guy runs up to engage, he's gonna go 5, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, 35, 40. Run up here to engage. These guys are all gonna come up here to surround Amethar and a couple of them are close enough to actually get in swings.

1:20:26 Ruby: He's not even the king anymore, you assholes. Stop trying to kill my dad.

1:20:31 Brennan: So it's gonna be 5, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30.

1:20:39 Lou: I got a dumb idea.

1:20:41 Siobhan: Great.

1:20:42 Lou: Oh, it's pure shenanigans. (Siobhan laughs)

1:20:46 Lou: Oh, I have the purest of shenanigans. Oh, Brennan.

1:20:49 Brennan: These guys are going to rush up.

1:20:52 Lou: You ain't seen shenanigans like mine.

1:20:54 Brennan: I am so very excited. These guys are gonna go, yeah, 5, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30. These guys rush up here. Do I have any other little bread helpers?

1:21:14 Siobhan: This guy already went.

1:21:15 Brennan: He already went, so two of these guys are gonna get swings on Manta Ray Jack. That's a hit. That's gonna be 6 on Manta Ray, he takes 6 points of damage, and then we have one, two, three, four, taking swings on the king. That's a hit, that’s a hit, hit plus-

1:21:58 Lou: Two misses?

1:22:02 Brennan: Only actually one miss.

1:22:04 Lou: Riposte.

1:22:05 Brennan: Ooh.

1:22:08 Emily: Oooh! Riposte.

1:22:09 Lou: Yeah, that'll hit.

1:22:10 Brennan: Go ahead and roll damage.

1:22:11 Lou: And does that add- No, he missed, yeah, just two. 9 plus 7, 16.

1:22:20 Brennan: One of the guy who misses you- You just- You literally get your leg up and stomp his shield down and just pummel his brain in. Down, that's going to be- However, the other three do hit and deal you 8, 10, 16 points of damage halved to 8.

1:22:44 Lou: Total?

1:22:45 Brennan: Total. (Brennan and Lou laugh)

1:22:51 Brennan: That's going to be-

1:22:53 Lou: Now I don't really want to do my shenanigans, now I just want to kill.

1:22:58 Brennan: They leap in, that's all my little bread guys. A lot of my knights are dead, and then that's going to be Saccharina.

1:23:11 Emily: Okay, I'd like to jump out the window and run to this space right here.

1:23:19 Brennan: You actually have enough- Yeah, you have enough movement to even just go out the back door.

1:23:21 Emily: Okay.

1:23:22 Brennan: Yeah.

1:23:23 Emily: So I wanna come right here and then I'm gonna cast Lightning Bolt on all these guys.

1:23:26 Siobhan: Oh, hell yes. Brennan, pained, facepalms.

1:23:28 Murph: Yo.

1:23:29 Siobhan: I mean, whatever, it's fine.

1:23:29 Emily: I guess-

1:23:31 Siobhan: I could do that if I wanted to.

1:23:33 Emily: I guess I'll do- Why not, 'cause Gristini's [sic] in there. I guess I'll do, well, we might need another- No, Thunder Step is third level. I guess I'll do another fourth level. Can I borrow 3d6?

1:23:45 Ally: Mm-hmm.

1:23:46 Emily: You love it, you love this. This is fun for you.

1:23:47 Brennan: We've been doing it like "Game of Thrones" for so long, and adding a primary spellcaster-

1:23:53 Emily: Okay, didn't roll that well, 10.

1:23:57 Siobhan: You did, you did. (overlapping chattering)

1:24:00 Zac: Wait, so-

1:24:02 Murph: The Red Woman showed up. (Zac laughs)

1:24:06 Brennan: I didn't realize that there's a perfect line, just organically.

1:24:10 Emily: There was one right here. (overlapping chattering)

1:24:12 Emily: I was gonna go here, and then when that happened.

1:24:13 Ally: It goes past-

1:24:15 Murph: Yo.

1:24:15 Emily: So it's 30-

1:24:18 Brennan: How many, wait- How many feet, it's 60 feet?

1:24:20 Siobhan: 60 feet?

1:24:20 Murph: It's a 100 foot line.

1:24:22 Emily: You know what, I'm-

1:24:22 Brennan: Wait, is it really 100-

1:24:23 Murph: 100 foot.

1:24:23 Emily: Yeah.

1:24:24 Brennan: So it's everyone, it's everybody, it goes past them to the back.

1:24:26 Emily: You know what I'm actually gonna do? I'm gonna do Empower Spell. Murph’s jaw drops and Brennan takes two steps back from the table in pure defeat.

1:24:28 Emily: So I'm gonna reroll four of these, I guess, 'cause that's-

1:24:35 Siobhan: Yeah.

1:24:36 Zac: Psyched.

1:24:38 Siobhan: Yeah, that helped.

1:24:41 Emily: Okay, so it's actually 10, 20, 30, 39 damage. Brennan is staring at her with his mouth slightly open. He blinks once, slowly.

1:24:45 Emily: But they also get a Dexterity saving throw, but they take half as much. Murph, looking over at Brennan and seeing him frozen and sad, laughs.

1:24:53 Emily: And lightning ignites flammable objects that aren't being worn or carried. Does that mean that I can light that-

1:24:59 Siobhan: Those trees on fire?

1:25:01 Brennan: You can definitely light the Ceresian banner on fire.

1:25:05 Zac: Do bread people burn?

1:25:06 Brennan: Yes.

1:25:06 Siobhan: They definitely do.

1:25:07 Emily: I think I wanna, since I'm right behind Gristini- Gristini-

1:25:11 Brennan: Oh, Grissini, yeah.

1:25:12 Emily: Grissini, I think I'm gonna lean in over his shoulder and say,

1:25:16 Saccharina: Watch your banner burn, bitch.

1:25:21 Emily: As I ignite him as the very first on my lightning kebab.

1:25:27 Brennan: So 39 actually means that none of the infantry, it doesn't matter if they save or not. So gone-

1:25:36 Siobhan: Bye, bitch.

1:25:38 Brennan: Gone.

1:25:39 Siobhan: Bye, bitch.

1:25:39 Brennan: Gone, gone, gone.

1:25:41 Siobhan: Bye, bitch.

1:25:42 Murph: Incredible.

1:25:44 Brennan: So four of them don't have a shot. It's a DC 16 save-

1:25:51 Zac: Just shooting him in the back, like, point blank?

1:25:53 Brennan: Okay, it's 39, so-

1:25:54 Emily: It's a ranged spell, but can I, it's touch, when I'm touching him, I'm doing it through him.

1:25:59 Brennan: So it's halved to, if it's half, it's 19, right?

1:26:05 Emily: Oh, and I did lightning damage so he gets another 3 damage.

1:26:09 Siobhan: Because he's wearing metal?

1:26:10 Brennan: Great, good.

1:26:10 Emily: Yeah. No, because I have an aura.

1:26:13 Siobhan: Oh, right.

1:26:14 Emily: Yeah.

1:26:15 Brennan: He takes another 3, he fails, so a 39 plus 3 is 42. (dramatic orchestral music)

1:26:23 Brennan: You watch as he rushes forward. (yells) He is like, right at the originating- Your hand just, this smell of crackling electric vanilla fills the night sky. I mean, even if that beacon hadn't done it, Saccharina's called down two lightning strikes in 12 seconds, four of them die. This one is badly injured. Yeah, you light them up, cool, any bonus actions?

1:26:52 Emily: Well, I have a question, so I know I can't use, I can't use two sorcery points on one spell, but can I use two sorcery points in a turn?

1:27:00 Brennan: I think you can use two sorcery points in a turn, yeah.

1:27:02 Emily: Okay, then you know what, I'm gonna use a Quicken Spell to then-

1:27:11 Brennan: Or, you have Twin Spell now, right, or no?

1:27:13 Emily: No, I did quicken, yeah.

1:27:13 Brennan: Okay, cool.

1:27:17 Emily: I'm gonna use Quicken Spell to I guess Booming Blade him.

1:27:23 Brennan: Okay, cool, awesome.

1:27:23 Emily: Yeah. That feels like, you know what? I'm just gonna sit on it, I'm not gonna do it.

1:27:29 Brennan: Cool, cool, cool-

1:27:30 Emily: I feel like I tortured him enough.

1:27:32 Brennan: You (mimics the blasting of Saccharina’s attack), Yeah, you're- The fact that Saccharina even has a look on her face that she's holding back some, of like, “you know what? We're gonna slow our roll here, we're all good”, cool. That's Saccharina, Cumulous, that's you.

1:27:48 Siobhan: Did I get, oh, no, I didn't. It's just such a long turn.

1:27:52 Brennan: Such a long turn, yeah.

1:27:53 Zac: Jesus, the game has changed.

1:27:57 Murph: You're in a hole, wait you’re not.

1:27:59 Zac: Listen, guys.

1:28:02 Lou: This feels like a perfect moment- Shoot out, kick, kick, kick, I believe.

1:28:06 Zac: I think- Like, it's one of those things where, flavor wise, I want to do something that's cool but it wouldn't do that much damage.

1:28:14 Emily: Do you have like a grappling hook you just shoot up to the gallows?

1:28:16 Zac: I'd love to- (sighs) I'm not going to do this, but I'll tell you what I wanted to do, I'd love to hang upside down from the noose with my feet and spin and hit everybody. But that's only 1d6, so I don't think I would kill anyone. It would knock them all off the platform, but I don't know if that would do any damage. I think I'm going to- I'm just trying to see if I can see any extra shit over here, it feels like you guys have it kind of handled over here. I'm going to disengage and pop out and hit this guy in the doorway, maybe.

1:28:55 Brennan: Cool, yeah.

1:28:56 Siobhan: The guy with a juicy butt?

1:28:58 Brennan: Cool, so you take, is that a bonus-

1:28:59 Lou: Juicy butt.

1:29:00 Siobhan: Juicy butt.

1:29:00 Lou: Juicy butt.

1:29:00 Brennan: You spend a Ki point.

1:29:00 Zac: I spend a Ki point to disengage.

1:29:02 Brennan: Cool, you leap over here.

1:29:04 Emily: Let me see the juicy butt. I can't...

1:29:07 Zac: And I'm going to just attack that guy.

1:29:10 Brennan: Hell yeah.

1:29:14 Zac: Ooh, does a 14 hit?

1:29:17 Brennan: 14 does not hit that guy.

1:29:20 Zac: Okay, I'll take my second attack. Does a 16 hit?

1:29:26 Brennan: 16 does not hit.

1:29:27 Zac: Okay, well.

1:29:29 Brennan: You do, oh, yeah, and you've used your bonus action to step there and disengage, so you swing, clank off of his armor. You still have disengage action if you want to use any extra movement.

1:29:41 Zac: Can I just jump onto the roof?

1:29:43 Brennan: Hell yeah.

1:29:44 Zac: And maybe the other side of the roof.

1:29:46 Brennan: Yeah, absolutely. As you go over the roof, give me a Perception check.

1:29:54 Zac: Fucking hell, 9.

1:29:57 Brennan: Cool, 9, you head over the roof.

1:29:59 Ally: Can I do a Perception check from where I'm at?

1:30:01 Brennan: Yeah, go for it, yeah.

1:30:06 Ally: Nat 1.

1:30:06 Brennan: Nat 1, all right. Cumulous, you take off over the roof. You're on the other side of the building. Amethar, that is you.

1:30:14 Lou: Great, I shout out,

1:30:14 Amethar: Most of the townspeople are in. We maybe consider packing it up.

1:30:21 Theobald: Yeah, not a bad idea.

1:30:23 Lou: And I'm gonna do something incredibly dumb, I'm gonna take three opportunity attacks from these people to move to engage with Cristini [sic] or Constano.

1:30:32 Siobhan: You don't take one from this guy 'cause you're still inside his area.

1:30:35 Lou: Okay, great, I'll take-

1:30:36 Siobhan: The- Just from the wieners.

1:30:38 Lou: Just from the wieners, and I walk up to them,

1:30:40 Amethar: Hey, do you remember my daughter?

1:30:43 Grissini: What?

1:30:44 Amethar: Do you remember my daughter?

1:30:46 Grissini: The Princess Jet?

1:30:48 Brennan: He looks- He just got electrocuted.

1:30:51 Amethar: She's dead, but you just met my new daughter. Not new, old, but I just found out about— [yells and attacks]

1:31:02 Brennan: Incredible-

1:31:02 Emily: I say,

1:31:02 Saccharina: That's a daddy daughter special.

1:31:04 Amethar: We're about to give them another daddy daughter special.

1:31:08 Brennan: Okay, hell yeah, first of all, let me register the three attacks on you.

1:31:13 Lou: Just two.

1:31:14 Brennan: Oh, just two, okay.

1:31:14 Lou: Not the gladiator.

1:31:16 Zac: You stay at the fence, right?

1:31:19 Brennan: That's no hits.

1:31:20 Lou: Great, and then yeah, we'll swing on Constano.

1:31:26 Brennan: Cool.

1:31:29 Siobhan: Is that a crit?

1:31:30 Lou: No, that's not a crit, but 29.

1:31:32 Brennan: That's a hit.

1:31:33 Lou: Great. (slow orchestral music)

1:31:38 Lou: Great, 7, 7 plus- 16.

1:31:43 Brennan: Awesome.

1:31:45 Lou: Great, second hit, 25.

1:31:47 Brennan: That hits.

1:31:51 Lou: 9 plus 9, 18, Action Surge.

1:31:56 Murph: Whoa. (Emily laughs)

1:31:58 Lou: 20?

1:31:59 Brennan: 20 hits.

1:32:04 Lou: 14.

1:32:06 Brennan: 14 damage?

1:32:07 Lou: Excuse me, 5 plus 9, 14, yeah. 12.

1:32:17 Brennan: 12 does not hit.

1:32:19 Lou: Okay.

1:32:20 Brennan: So Amethar, you see that this guy was looking-

1:32:22 Lou: Oh, I forgot to do so much. Being a Battlemaster is hard. I'm used to just attacking.

1:32:31 Brennan: Oh, right, trip attack and everything else like that, yes, yes, yes, for sure. You rush up, Saccharina, you just electrocuted him. You watch that damage get doubled as Amethar strides up and (mimics attack) bang, bang, bang.

1:32:47 Lou: And bonus action, 3 points of damage from the aura.

1:32:51 Brennan: Hell yeah.

1:32:55 Lou: To both him and the gladiator.

1:32:57 Brennan: And the gladiator-

1:32:58 Ally: I wanna know what's in that tent.

1:32:59 Emily: I know, that's my-

1:33:01 Ally: That's fucking Ciabatta, or some shit.

1:33:01 Siobhan: It's so far away from me.

1:33:05 Brennan: That's going to be- Yeah, Grissini is not looking good. He's not anywhere near death's door, he's still very much standing, but he's been- He's gone from uninjured to badly injured very quickly. That is now going to be the bishop, the [posh British accent] Archbishop Oliver Onionpatch, [normal] who is going to make a Perception check with advantage. I'm going to need a Dexterity saving throw from Liam.

1:33:47 Ally: Oh, but I was hidden, why would he get advantage?

1:33:50 Brennan: He is hitting an area of effect. He's not spotting where you are. He knows that arrows are coming in through a window, and he's throwing up an area of effect outside.

1:34:03 Ally: Okay, a Dex saving throw. I'm seeing if I-

1:34:06 Murph: You have plus 7.

1:34:08 Ally: Yeah, I was wondering if I have advantage on that with my Hunter's Mark. Yeah, advantage on any Wisdom, Perception, or Survival check.

1:34:19 Brennan: This is a Dexterity saving throw.

1:34:23 Ally: Okay, cool. Cool, okay. (whistles) Yeah, a 25.

1:34:29 Brennan: Okay. 10, 20, 32, 37 halved to 18.

1:34:42 Ally: Cool.

1:34:43 Brennan: You take 18 points of fire damage, as he reaches out his hand and says,

1:34:47 Onionpatch: Bulb, protect me!

1:34:47 Brennan: And just the entire top floor of that home bursts into flame. And then he ducks away from the window, hides deeper in the house. That is Oliver. Rest of the townsfolk rush into the sugar hut. Oh, also, Manta Ray on his turn kills another one of these soldiers, and he goes,

1:35:11 Manta Ray: Two!

1:35:15 Lou: Did the fry guy go?

1:35:18 Brennan: Oh, he did not go, thank you.

1:35:20 Lou: If we're gonna fucking merc you, I'm gonna merc you fairly, dude, I'll tell you right now.

1:35:25 Brennan: Fry guy is gonna go, 5, 10, 15, 20, 25-

1:35:32 Lou: Just fucking smashing over tables, get-

1:35:35 Brennan: 45, 50, he's gonna go-

1:35:37 Murph: Oh, shit.

1:35:38 Brennan: Yeah, he's gonna move all the way over there on his turn. Okay, that is going to be- Yeah, that's what Bonathan does. You guys hear (imitates booming). (dramatic orchestral music)

1:36:00 Brennan: And creatures begin to appear. Brennan sets down three minis; they are warped and twisted bread-adjacent things, and all of them look chained.

1:36:06 Emily: I think we're going to have to make a retreat.

1:36:08 Lou: All the townspeople are in.

1:36:12 Brennan: Making their appearance from the various corners here, as the beacons are lit and a horrifying creature skitters out. [feral screeching] Brennan sets down a giant, chained corn with one menacing red eye and big grasping hands. (group exclaims)

1:36:29 Ally: No way. A giant—

1:36:31 Murph: The ultimate cutie.

1:36:33 Siobhan: My nemesis.

1:36:34 Ally: The ultimate cutie!

1:36:37 Brennan: I don't know why you're calling that cute. That thing's fucking enormous.

1:36:39 Siobhan: He's thick and cute.

1:36:40 Murph: Turbo cutie, turbo cutie.

1:36:42 Lou: Honesty, shout out to Rick Perry on this butt right now, I got a real-

1:36:44 Siobhan: Yeah, that’s a- That’s-

1:36:46 Lou: That's a real solid- Emily leans over to see the butt and cheers appreciatively.

1:36:47 Siobhan: That's like that- Baby butt right there.

1:36:48 Lou: [right into the camera, making an OK sign] That's good work. That’s good work. (Emily laughs)

1:36:53 Brennan: Okay, this thing's gonna take some slams at Amethar.

1:36:59 Murph: Yikes.

1:37:06 Brennan: That's going to be- Amethar, you take first 8 halved to 4, and then 21 halved to 10 bludgeoning damage. I'm going to need two Constitution saving throws.

1:37:28 Lou: Great. Constitution saving throws. Damn, 9.

1:37:38 Murph: Yikes.

1:37:41 Lou: Nat 20.

1:37:41 Zac: Nat 20.

1:37:43 Brennan: Okay, the first one you took was 4. Your hit point maximum is reduced by 4, as things thing hits you screaming. It rushes up, this thing's gonna come for Saccharina. Saccharina, I'm gonna need a Constitution saving throw from you.

1:38:14 Emily: Did it hit?

1:38:15 Brennan: It did.

1:38:17 Emily: Shield.

1:38:18 Brennan: It does not hit.

1:38:20 Ally: Great.

1:38:20 Murph: Yeah. Emily grins in triumph, holding her hands out.

1:38:21 Brennan: Pew, this wall of icy, frosty ice cream magic goes up around you.

1:38:25 Emily: I let him know,

1:38:25 Saccharina: I thought about letting you hit me because I actually have kind of a reaction that I could hurt you, but I took pity on you.

1:38:31 Golem: [feral shrieking]

1:38:36 Brennan: These are like horrifying bread golems, charging out of the mist here. This one is going to go charging and begins to rip its way after the townfolk, ripping the door apart, trying to get to the stones. This one is going to come over here for Manta Ray.

1:39:02 Murph: Oh, no, Manta Ray, get out of there.

1:39:07 Lou: Dammit, Manta Ray.

1:39:09 Murph: He's surrounded.

1:39:10 Brennan: Well, the highest one there was a natural 8.

1:39:15 Ally: Hell yeah.

1:39:15 Brennan: Which does not hit Manta Ray's AC.

1:39:18 Lou: There you go.

1:39:20 Brennan: You see that this thing goes, (imitates roaring) and Manta Ray goes.

1:39:22 Manta Ray: (shouts as he dodges) Time for Manta Ray to beat a hasty retreat!

1:39:29 Brennan: Top of the order, Theo.

1:39:30 Murph: Sweet.

1:39:32 Emily: Remember, you got my people with you.

1:39:33 Murph: Alright, the people, they got the weapons. I'm going to just bolt out and try to get up to-

1:39:41 Brennan: You've got this knight, this Vegetanian knight blocking the doorway right here.

1:39:45 Murph: Dammit.

1:39:46 Emily: You could set, but my people can clear the way for you.

1:39:50 Brennan: Oh, that's true, Gooey can take some swings.

1:39:52 Emily: Sweet.

1:39:55 Brennan: That's gonna be a hit. Gooey slices his head off.

1:40:00 Murph: Thank you, Gooey.

1:40:02 Zac: Pick up more, can-

1:40:04 Brennan: I forgot, this guy was only at 2 hit points after Saccharina-

1:40:07 Murph: Sweet, so I'll use my movement to get to- God, all right, so we got this big ass dude, what can I  do- Oh, here's an idea.

1:40:18 Lou: Hit him.

1:40:19 Murph: I'm going to cast- I'm going to- Fuck! Okay, what am I gonna do? I'm gonna get, I'm gonna try to get up in the mix. You know what, I'll run up, I'm gonna attack this dude, just to do some damage. Or, you know what? No that is- Yes, okay, sorry for my indecision, I'm gonna run up to that guy.

1:40:43 Brennan: 25, okay.

1:40:44 Murph: Okay, I'm going to, before I decide what I do, I'm gonna cast Compelled Duel on this guy.

1:40:51 Brennan: Okay, awesome, Compelled Duel is a Wisdom saving throw, I believe, yes?

1:40:55 Murph: Yes.

1:40:56 Ally: And they don't seem very smart.

1:41:00 Brennan: This thing turns around as the magic from the battle pop surrounds it and goes. (imitates growling)

1:41:08 Theobald: Yes, everything's working according to plan.

1:41:13 Murph: And Theo pees a little bit again. Then I am going to- Yeah, you know what, I'll stand there. I'll just take some cracks at this guy in front of me, and Princess will help me. Two nat ones in a row, so-

1:41:33 Brennan: One in 400 chance of happening, incredible.

1:41:38 Murph: Oh, boy, that's only a 14 to hit on the second attack-

1:41:41 Brennan: 14, 14 does not hit.

1:41:43 Murph: Fuck me, cool.

1:41:45 Brennan: Cling, clang, clang, as this lumbering golem turns to face you, and where's, oh, there's Princess. Princess runs out behind you here.

1:41:57 Emily: Princess!

1:41:58 Brennan: And you see that Swifty grabs a bunch of the weapons and literally has this huge stack of weapons and rushes into the sugar hut with them.

1:42:08 Murph: Swifty rules.

1:42:10 Swifty: Ha ha, I'm rich!

1:42:13 Theobald: Yes, the whole army, we're gonna distribute those.

1:42:16 Swifty: All for me, hundreds of weapons.

1:42:18 Theobald: Yes, the cause.

1:42:20 Brennan: You- That is going to, okay. (slow orchestral music)

1:42:27 Brennan: Grissini is going to-

1:42:31 Murph: Let's all get out of here, folks.

1:42:34 Lou: Yeah, it's one of these-

1:42:42 Brennan: He hits twice.

1:42:44 Murph: What are you at?

1:42:45 Lou: 64.

1:42:46 Murph: Okay.

1:42:48 Brennan: First attack, he hits Amethar for 5, 15, 17, 21 halved to 10. And then he crits.

1:43:00 Emily: Is this Grissini?

1:43:00 Brennan: This is Grissini.

1:43:04 Murph: Is Amethar within 30 feet of me?

1:43:07 Lou: I don't think so.

1:43:08 Brennan: 5, 10, 15, 20, no.

1:43:11 Siobhan: Is he, how fucked up is Gristini [sic] looking from these two like, 50 hit point attacks that he’s had on him?

1:43:19 Brennan: He looks heroically injured.

1:43:22 Siobhan: Great.

1:43:24 Lou: Great adjective.

1:43:29 Brennan: 8, 12-

1:43:30 Murph: One of these monster guys hit you? Oh, no, it's just Grissini.

1:43:33 Siobhan: Gristini, but he's like-

1:43:34 Zac: One of the monsters hit him for 9-

1:43:35 Brennan: 32, 36.

1:43:35 Murph: Yeah.

1:43:36 Brennan: 36 damage, halved to 18.

1:43:39 Lou: Look, I don't care.

1:43:42 Brennan: He (shouts). And then he is going to, as a bonus action, he is going to grant an ally within 30 feet. He's gonna grant that golem an attack, that golem crits against Saccharina.

1:44:07 Emily: Okay. My reaction is used, right, 'cause I used Shield, so I don't have any reaction?

1:44:14 Brennan: He's still- He passes through the Shield on a critical hit.

1:44:17 Emily: No, no, no, but I'm saying, I'm not using a Shield.

1:44:19 Brennan: You actually still get the benefit from it-

1:44:21 Murph: For the rest of the round.

1:44:21 Brennan: For the rest of the round.

1:44:22 Emily: Oh, okay.

1:44:25 Brennan: I will need a Constitution saving throw.

1:44:28 Emily: Okay.

1:44:33 Murph: Alright.

1:44:39 Emily: That is going to be 20.

1:44:44 Brennan: 20 succeeds.

1:44:45 Emily: Okay.

1:44:46 Brennan: You take 31 points of damage.

1:44:50 Ally: What are you at?

1:44:54 Emily: A lady never tells. [cast laughs]

1:44:58 Emily: I'm at 18.

1:44:59 Murph: Oh my God.

1:45:00 Ally: Interesting.

1:45:01 Brennan: Yeah, Grissini is like a whirling dervish (mimics Grissini’s attack) and he kicks the Winterscoop out from under you, just enough to lower your head and let this golem just body you.

1:45:14 Ally: Fucker.

1:45:15 Brennan: That is-

1:45:15 Saccharina: Couldn't hit me yourself?

1:45:18 Brennan: You see, that's Grissini's turn, Liam, that's you.

1:45:24 Ally: Cool, I pop through this window right here. I ignore difficult terrain, I walk into that house.

1:45:30 Murph: Oh my God, terrifying!

1:45:32 Ally: I look exactly like this onion person. In Bulbosi I say,

1:45:35 Liam: [holding his crossbow threateningly] Who is in the military tent?

1:45:43 Brennan: Go ahead and make an intimidation check with advantage, if you'd be so kind.

1:45:46 Ally: Great.

1:45:48 Murph: Come on. Nat 20.

1:45:49 Ally: Nat 20. (group cheers)

1:45:51 Ally: Nat 20.

1:45:51 Emily: How?

1:45:52 Siobhan: This guy is quitting the Church.

1:45:54 Brennan: He pisses himself. He's just peeing and crying-

1:45:58 Emily: Now you're war buddies, though, you've seen him piss himself.

1:46:00 Brennan: You see, he says,

1:46:00 Onionpatch: Master Wilhelmina—

1:46:04 Ally: No, I look like him.

1:46:05 Brennan: Oh, you look like him, he goes- He goes,

1:46:07 Onionpatch: Great Bulb above!

1:46:10 Liam: Who?

1:46:11 Onionpatch: [crying] Great Bulb above, I'm only trying to serve you. Your loyal servant Sir Keradin Deeproot.

1:46:17 Liam: Good.

1:46:18 Zac: Keradin Deeproot's in there?

1:46:20 Onionpatch: He has gone farther afield, he is here. He is ranging after the fugitives escaping from the village, he is on long patrol.

1:46:29 Liam: Okay, he's around, and who else is in that tent?

1:46:32 Onionpatch: No one, the tent is deserted. They've all come out for the execution of Joren Jawbreaker, (crying) I swear it.

1:46:40 Ally: I ice him. I absolutely ice him.

1:46:44 Murph: So fucking-

1:46:44 Brennan: Yeah, go ahead-

1:46:45 Ally: Is it advantage, 'cause he's on the ground-

1:46:46 Brennan: Honestly, you hit a nat 20 on intimidate. He's pissing himself, roll with advantage.

1:46:51 Ally: Nat 20! (group cheers)

1:46:53 Ally: I crit! Lou holds out a hand like “this may as well happen”. Zac flops backwards in his chair, hands on his face.

1:46:53 Ally: I crit, baby, this is all the dice for the crit. Oh, baby, we got 10, we got 20. We got 38— Brennan is aggressively pressing his hands into his brow.

1:47:03 Murph: Oh my God, this is fucking ridiculous.

1:47:05 Ally: 41, plus 7, 48.

1:47:07 Zac: How do you do it?

1:47:10 Emily: Yeah, how?

1:47:10 Zac: How do you do it?

1:47:11 Emily: Yeah. How, how, I've had maybe one nat 20 this entire season. (Ally laughs in giddy victory)

1:47:17 Brennan: Liam hears,

1:47:17 Onionpatch: [through sobs] Keradin Deeproot, Commander Constano Grissini, the priest, we're here on behalf of the pontifex, I can tell you everything. They're planning a secret meeting. All of the knowledge, the letters are being kept in the Commander's tent, the pontifex and Plumebline Uvano, they're planning a meeting for a new Concord.

1:47:38 Liam: Great.

1:47:39 Onionpatch: It's all in the tent, everything you need to know is in the tent!

1:47:41 Liam: Good. (shoots)

1:47:41 Ally: And he's gone. I grab that book- Is there, can I- Is there anything else in this tent that we could use? Any other info, or?

1:47:51 Brennan: You walk into the tent. Your body changes. (slow piano music)

1:47:58 Brennan: You have been a young gawky teen for a long time.

1:48:01 Ally: Yeah, that's true.

1:48:03 Brennan: Your body has always been kind of a human apology.

1:48:07 Ally: [laughs] That's definitely true, I just imagine my posture is like- [hunches over].

1:48:11 Brennan: Something changes in you, and you move with a fluid grace, like a wild predator at the apex of every food chain that truly neither fears nor acknowledges death. You ice him, pick up the book. As you are picking up the book to close it, the shadows of the room around you pick up the loose pages, soiled with the urine and excrement of this murdered bishop, and the shadows literally lift them, and as you are closing the book, insert them into the book in an order most pleasing to you as you shut it and walk out into the night.

1:48:52 Ally: Great, I-

1:48:53 Zac: Do you have another attack?

1:48:54 Ally: I do, I do. I walk out, I rip the flag down and take that, as well, so I have the book wrapped in their flag, and then I attack that fry guy.

1:49:09 Brennan: Hell yeah, go ahead and knock that flag and that onion down, and then Liam, you walk out right here. Go ahead and take your other attack. He does not see you, so this is with advantage, as well.

1:49:19 Emily: The onion's kind of cute, his little hat.

1:49:22 Ally: 22.

1:49:23 Brennan: 22 hits. No sneak attack on this one, so this is just- And no hunter's mark, as well. So this is just 1d10.

1:49:28 Ally: Oh, yeah, I can use a bonus action to make a new Hunter's-

1:49:32 Brennan: Oh, cool-

1:49:33 Ally: When they go to zero.

1:49:33 Brennan: So this is just 1d10 plus 1d6.

1:49:35 Ally: But I can make, I can use my bonus action to Hunter's Mark the fry guy.

1:49:39 Brennan: Cool, he's Hunter's Marked, that's where the d6 is coming from.

1:49:42 Ally: Oh, cool, so it's a-

1:49:42 Brennan: Right, so it's 1d10, plus 1d6.

1:49:44 Ally: 1d10, 1d6, I got you, I got you.

1:49:46 Brennan: Plus 7.

1:49:47 Zac: You do so much damage, it's insane.

1:49:49 Ally: It's insane.

1:49:49 Siobhan: It is wild.

1:49:50 Ally: Just these- recently, 1d10, 1d6?

1:49:53 Brennan: 1d10, 1d6, yeah.

1:49:53 Emily: But also you crit, multiple times, every episode.

1:49:57 Ally: Yeah, okay, great, that's 19.

1:50:03 Brennan: Incredible, as Bonathan is fighting, he feels a mint arrow in his back. (yells) Screams as an arrow flies out of the fucking darkness-

1:50:13 Ally: And then can I use my remaining- I think I only have 5 or 10, to start heading towards the house?

1:50:18 Brennan: You actually are at it 'cause you slipped out of the house this same round, so you've used your movement-

1:50:21 Ally: Oh, of course, yeah, yeah, yeah.

1:50:22 Brennan: So that's where you're gonna end your movement.

1:50:25 Ally: Okay.

1:50:25 Brennan: Insane, truly insane. So you know about what's in the Commander's tent and you have all that-

1:50:33 Ally: Yes, can I twin- Or can I still Message-

1:50:36 Brennan: Yeah, I'll leave you a free Message here, yeah.

1:50:38 Ally: I let her know that all that really helpful info is in the tent at the other end of the city.

1:50:42 Siobhan: At the other end? Fuck. Okay.

1:50:45 Brennan: Yeah.

1:50:45 Siobhan: Okay.

1:50:46 Brennan: Ruby, that's your turn.

1:50:48 Siobhan: I tell Liam's mom to get to the sugar hut as quickly as she can. And fuck it, I'm just gonna use my full movement, plus my bonus dash to get as close to the- This other tent as I can. So that's 105 feet of movement.

1:51:18 Brennan: Jesus. Okay. Give me an Acrobatics check to ignore difficult terrain.

1:51:23 Siobhan: Oh, and then I also have Jump, so-

1:51:25 Ally: Yeah, oh, yeah-

1:51:25 Brennan: Oh, you have Jump. Yeah, got you, cool, cool, cool.

1:51:27 Siobhan: So difficult terrain, I don't feel like is-

1:51:28 Brennan: Yeah, is nothing. Okay, so you're crashing through the window, that's 80 feet, you said 105?

1:51:35 Siobhan: Yeah.

1:51:36 Brennan: 80.

1:51:37 Siobhan: And then towards the tent.

1:51:39 Brennan: Towards the tent? Okay if- These guys will get reaction-

1:51:44 Siobhan: Well, but I can get to here, and then that way, is what I mean.

1:51:45 Brennan: Okay, got you. Go ahead and pass Ruby to me. So that's gonna be 80, 85, 90, 95, 100, 105 right here?

1:51:57 Siobhan: Mm-hmm.

1:51:59 Brennan: Cool, go ahead and pass Yak to me. Yak is following behind you, and go ahead and pass Spearia to me, Spearia is gonna rush into the sugar hut.

1:52:08 Siobhan: Great.

1:52:09 Ally: Hey, hell yeah.

1:52:10 Brennan: She rushes, she rushes past, you're within-

1:52:13 Siobhan: Can she take Invisibility—

1:52:15 Brennan: Are you still within the light over there? Are you within 20 feet of that brazier over there, Liam?

1:52:19 Ally: I think so, yeah.

1:52:19 Siobhan: Yes.

1:52:21 Brennan: She runs, and you see, she looks over and sees you at the edge of the light. You see your mother—

1:52:26 Siobhan: She's invisible.

1:52:27 Brennan: Oh, she's invisible, so you don't see anything.

1:52:28 Ally: Damn.

1:52:29 Brennan: Damn.

1:52:30 Siobhan: Sorry.

1:52:30 Ally: Too bad.

1:52:31 Emily: It's not the right moment, anyways.

1:52:32 Brennan: She rushes, that is Ruby. This dude right here- I'm gonna need a Wisdom saving throw from Theo.

1:52:44 Murph: Fuck. Fuckin' fuck me, 3.

1:52:53 Brennan: You feel yourself constricted by bonds of magic, as this priest says,

1:52:59 Priest: By the power of the bulb, I abjure you, wicked, licentious, naughty gummy bear.

1:53:06 Theobald: Fuck the Bulb.

1:53:08 Emily: On your next turn, send Gooey after him to maybe break his concentration.

1:53:13 Murph: That'll be good, yeah.

1:53:23 Brennan: Caramelinda shouts out and says,

1:53:25 Caramelinda: I can't- I can’t hold on anymore, I can't hold on anymore.

1:53:28 Brennan: Shouts out from within the sugar hut.

1:53:31 Saccharina: Retreat.

1:53:32 Brennan: She basically says, on her next turn, the spell's gonna go off.

1:53:38 Murph: Okay.

1:53:38 Ally: Okay.

1:53:39 Siobhan: So we have to get back to her by her next turn?

1:53:42 Brennan: Yeah, something to that effect.

1:53:44 Siobhan: Fuck! Goddammit.

1:53:45 Emily: Okay.

1:53:47 Brennan: That's Caramelinda.

1:53:50 Ally: Damn, I wish I had spells.

1:53:50 Zac: Do you still have Thunder Step?

1:53:55 Brennan: Okay.

1:53:55 Emily: Well-

1:53:57 Brennan: That's going to be-

1:54:01 Zac: You wouldn't have to get hit, right?

1:54:02 Emily: But I think everyone can get back, can't they? 'Cause if not, everyone has a turn.

1:54:09 Zac: Although- Yeah, just worried about all these attacks and opportunities around this world.

1:54:14 Emily: Oh, to get myself out?

1:54:16 Zac: Yeah, to-

1:54:16 Emily: I'll be able to get myself out. I thought you meant like, if someone else needed it.

1:54:18 Zac: And the king, or?

1:54:20 Emily: Will you be able to get away, right?

1:54:21 Lou: I can get most of the way with a disengage.

1:54:23 Emily: Yeah, that's what I figured you could do, disengage.

1:54:29 Brennan: Ruby, you take 5 points of damage-

1:54:33 Siobhan: I Uncanny Dodge.

1:54:36 Brennan: Uncanny Dodge, okay, 5 points of damage, you take 2 points of damage.

1:54:41 Siobhan: Great, where's my pencil?

1:54:43 Brennan: I'm gonna need a Dexterity saving throw.

1:54:48 Siobhan: Okay, I have, I-

1:54:50 Brennan: Oh, sorry, no, I actually don't need that right now, you're okay.

1:54:52 Siobhan: Okay.

1:54:55 Brennan: And for these archers, two hits, one archer deals you 11, 13, 15 points of damage. The next one deals you 17, 19 points of damage.

1:55:19 Siobhan: Okay.

1:55:21 Brennan: What is Ruby at?

1:55:24 Siobhan: 25.

1:55:26 Brennan: This guy's going to- These guys are all gonna charge Amethar. Yeah… over here… This guy's already dead. Okay, that's gonna be- All three are gonna hit and that's gonna miss. That's actually a miss.

1:56:05 Lou: Who missed?

1:56:06 Brennan: This guy misses right here.

1:56:08 Lou: Riposte.

1:56:09 Brennan: Go for it.

1:56:13 Lou: 25.

1:56:14 Brennan: That hits.

1:56:15 Lou: He hasn't hit me yet, right?

1:56:16 Brennan: Correct.

1:56:19 Lou: 9 plus 9 equals 18.

1:56:25 Brennan: You behead him, as he misses you. (mimics Amethar’s attack) And he falls dead, the Ceresian captain. The rest hit you for 10 plus 16, halved to 8. What's Amethar at?

1:56:41 Lou: 28.

1:56:45 Brennan: [roaring] That is- Those Ceresians- These guys are gonna turn here and surround Theo.

1:56:58 Murph: Am I restrained, what's my deal?

1:57:02 Brennan: You are not restrained.

1:57:03 Murph: Okay.

1:57:07 Brennan: You see they're gonna take some attacks on you, but you do have a minus to your armor class. That is a critical hit. You take 10 plus 2, you take 12 points of damage, as one crits on you. And if you would go ahead and move that Ceresian over to Liam, he's gonna charge you. Take an attack, hit, and deal Liam 6 points of damage. And then, that's these guys. And Bonathan is going to attack Saccharina, it's a miss. That was almost a nat 20, but instead was a 2. That is going to- That's their turn. That's now going to be Saccharina, again.

1:58:02 Emily: Okay. Are you good, Amethar?

1:58:06 Lou: I'm about 90% sure I'm good, 80, 60% sure I'm good.

1:58:13 Ally: Woah.

1:58:13 Emily: I don't like those odds.

1:58:14 Lou: I mean, my- I disengage and run past the golem is the dream.

1:58:20 Emily: Oh, but you still have to run past the golem?

1:58:22 Siobhan: But if you're- It's the disengage.

1:58:24 Murph: He’s Compelled Duel.

1:58:26 Siobhan: It’s a disengage-

1:58:26 Murph: He doesn’t need to get through the door-

1:58:27 Emily: I use my bonus action to do my Tempestuous Magic to fly 10 feet over, and then I Thunder Step into here with Amethar, yeah.

1:58:36 Brennan: Amethar, okay.

1:58:40 Emily: So everyone takes- It’s only third level. So it's gonna be 3d10, but I have to roll it.

1:58:47 Brennan: Okay, wild.

1:58:50 Emily: And when I get in there, I'm gonna say to Swifty,

1:58:52 Saccharina: Swifty, show me how fast you are, go get Ruby.

1:58:58 Swifty: Okay, but she's maybe not gonna like it, and that does it for me.

1:59:03 Saccharina: You know what, you know what I've learned? Maybe you have a grating personality, but you still have a lot to offer.

1:59:10 Swifty: Ha ha ha! I'm deep down bad, and I recognize that. (Emily laughs)

1:59:14 Emily: Okay, and then I guess I'll just stick with that. So they all take, let's see, they all take 17 damage. And me and Amethar go inside here-

1:59:28 Brennan: Vanish.

1:59:29 Emily: Well, they actually take 20 damage, unless they save, then they take 13 damage.

1:59:33 Brennan: Gotcha, okay. Hold on one second, I'll roll for these guys first. This guy is down, and the others take how much? How much do they take if they save?

1:59:46 Emily: Oh, they save, they take, so it's 17 divided by, well, it's technically- ‘Cause I add 3 for my, like, storm aura kind of thing.

1:59:55 Brennan: 17 halved is 8, plus three is 11?

1:59:57 Emily: Plus 3 is 11, yeah.

1:59:58 Brennan: Oh, they're all dead.

2:00:00 Murph: Nice.

2:00:01 Brennan: Gone, Grissini's gonna roll a save, makes it, and how much is that you did? You did, 17, or, yeah, 11- 11 if they made it.

2:00:12 Emily: 11 if he saves.

2:00:16 Brennan: One, oh. One. Incredible, you and Amethar vanish back in. That's Saccharina, Cumulous, that's you.

2:00:30 Zac: I'm still on the roof, right? Seeing that I’m actually on the roof-

2:00:34 Brennan: Yeah, just on the roof, yeah.

2:00:35 Zac: This is the last turn we'll have before we go inside.

2:00:37 Emily: Yeah.

2:00:39 Zac: Okay, all right.

2:00:40 Siobhan: No, I think we have to get inside this turn.

2:00:42 Zac: Yeah.

2:00:45 Lou: Yeah, if we're after Caramelinda.

2:00:49 Zac: I want to-

2:00:52 Siobhan: Oh, if we go after Caramelinda?

2:00:53 Lou: Well. Unless you-

2:00:56 Emily: You still have another round.

2:00:58 Lou: No.

2:00:58 Emily: No, I was saying Ruby does.

2:01:00 Lou: Oh, yeah, I think you might, yes.

2:01:04 Emily: 'Cause I think Caramelinda's turn was right after yours, wasn't it?

2:01:07 Zac: I think-

2:01:07 Siobhan: I'll ask.

2:01:09 Zac: I just want to- If I jump to here and hit here, will I have enough movement to get back inside?

2:01:15 Brennan: If you do a bonus action, yes, I believe you will, 'cause your speed is 45.

2:01:17 Zac: Just try and dodge that.

2:01:19 Brennan: Yeah, you definitely will.

2:01:20 Zac: All right, I'm gonna jump down on this mage dude and hit him.

2:01:24 Brennan: Go and give me an attack.

2:01:25 Zac: Okay. Nat 20. (group cheers)

2:01:30 Brennan: Go ahead and roll damage.

2:01:31 Zac: He's already been hurt, too, right?

2:01:32 Brennan: He's already been hurt, yeah, for sure.

2:01:33 Zac: So that's 2d8?

2:01:35 Brennan: 2d8, plus whatever you add, yeah.

2:01:36 Zac: 12? 6, 7, plus 12.

2:01:40 Brennan: I think it's just plus 6, you don't double your other damage.

2:01:43 Zac: Okay, yeah, okay, so 12 plus seven, 19.

2:01:46 Brennan: 18, you (mimics Cumulous’ attack), crack, and split his skull open, he's dead.

2:01:49 Zac: And then,

2:01:49 Ally: Yes!

2:01:51 Zac: I just take my full movement to run inside, 'cause I think that's all I can do, right?

2:01:56 Brennan: Yes, and actually, you've got this guy blocking the door here.

2:02:04 Emily: Oh, go after him. (dramatic orchestral music)

2:02:06 Zac: But I'm in, that's a- I have one more attack, right?

2:02:14 Brennan: You have one- You have one more attack, yes. You could try and take a shove action to try to move him out of the way of the door.

2:02:26 Zac: Yeah, I guess I have to, I don't think I can really do much else.

2:02:30 Murph: Hopefully he'll come after me and I can like grab you in my turn or something else?

2:02:34 Ally: Oh, he's in a duel.

2:02:34 Emily: Oh right he's in a Compelled Duel.

2:02:35 Ally: Compelled Duel.

2:02:36 Brennan: He's in a Compelled Duel, that's true. So maybe you can count him moving on his turn.

2:02:41 Lou: But you won't have another-

2:02:43 Zac: Can I-

2:02:43 Siobhan: Hold your movement?

2:02:44 Emily: Gooey's with you. She's with you.

2:02:49 Zac: Can I-

2:02:49 Brennan: You could also make an Acrobatics check to just try to move past him.

2:02:53 Zac: Yeah, just because I don't know how long- Can I hold to, to run in once he starts moving out of the way, even after I shove, try to shove him? Or is that one or the other?

2:03:13 Brennan: You can- I think in this instance, I will allow you to hold a movement reaction when he moves to dart in.

2:03:24 Zac: Okay.

2:03:26 Brennan: Cool.

2:03:28 Zac: Great, and I gained 11 temp hit points for killing that dude.

2:03:32 Brennan: Cool, crack, you hold your movement action.

2:03:35 Ally: Crazy.

2:03:36 Brennan: Amethar, that's you.

2:03:38 Lou: Ruby or Liam or Theobald, is anyone worried about making it back?

2:03:42 Ally: No.

2:03:42 Theobald: I'm fine.

2:03:44 Lou: Okay.

2:03:45 Emily: I did send Swifty to help, but you could go after that guy in the front door.

2:03:49 Lou: That's my plan.

2:03:50 Zac: But you can get back-

2:03:50 Ally: Or you could-

2:03:52 Murph: He's gonna come after me, he's compelled-

2:03:53 Ally: You could give a help action to Caramelinda.

2:03:55 Lou: I learned something from my daughter once upon a time. Can I attack the golem at the front door?

2:04:02 Emily: [grinning] I know what you're gonna do.

2:04:02 Brennan: Yes, you can.

2:04:04 Lou: And can I make it a Reckless Attack?

2:04:05 Brennan: Yes, you can.

2:04:06 Lou: Great. Oh, 19 hit?

2:04:11 Brennan: 19 hits.

2:04:12 Lou: And I'll expend a superiority- Superiority- Superiority die to use a Maneuvering Attack and yell to Ruby,

2:04:20 Amethar: Ruby, let's go. (Emily laughs)

2:04:22 Murph: Oh, nice.

2:04:24 Lou: And that, so yeah, Ruby will be able to move up to half her movement.

2:04:28 Brennan: Up to how much?

2:04:30 Lou: I think it's half her movement without opportunity attacks.

2:04:31 Emily: Without opportunity attacks.

2:04:32 Siobhan: Oh, right now?

2:04:33 Brennan: Right now.

2:04:34 Siobhan: Great.

2:04:35 Brennan: You get that movement right now-

2:04:36 Ally: Which way do you go?

2:04:37 Brennan: Half your movement, that's like 20-

2:04:38 Emily: Oh, 'cause you have Jump right now-

2:04:39 Siobhan: No, my movement is 35, so yeah, 20?

2:04:42 Brennan: Okay, 20, yeah, great.

2:04:43 Siobhan: Or 18?

2:04:43 Brennan: Yeah, we'll round up. Cool, you get an immediate, you can make it into the tent this round.

2:04:46 Murph: What? Oh my god.

2:04:48 Siobhan: Great, is it, what's the distance back, is that-

2:04:51 Brennan: Hold on.

2:04:51 Saccharina: No, don't go into that tent!

2:04:54 Ruby: Don't tell me what to do. (Ally laughs)

2:04:56 Murph: Jesus! (intense music)

2:04:57 Brennan: The map of Calorum, and all of the troop movements of the Imperial Concord and Ceresian military.

2:05:01 Murph: Wow.

2:05:06 Ally: Yes!

2:05:06 Siobhan: Great.

2:05:08 Lou: Is it one superiority die per attack, or-

2:05:12 Brennan: Per attack, yeah, so you get- Add that d8-

2:05:13 Lou: So I- Okay. 6, 9, plus 2, 8 plus 11, plus 9, 20-

2:05:26 Brennan: 20 damage to that Golem?

2:05:27 Lou: And then I'll Reckless Attack it again.

2:05:29 Brennan: Go for it.

2:05:33 Lou: Great, a 23.

2:05:34 Brennan: That hits.

2:05:35 Lou: Can I use- Expend another Superiority die on this attack?

2:05:37 Brennan: Yes, you can.

2:05:38 Lou: Second Maneuvering Attack from Ruby, can Ruby hear me?

2:05:39 Murph: Wow!

2:05:41 Brennan: Yes, she can.

2:05:42 Lou: Great.

2:05:42 Amethar: Ruby, let's go!

2:05:44 Ruby: I'm coming!

2:05:46 Lou: Great, so half your movement again, that's, yeah.

2:05:50 Murph: Wow.

2:05:52 Lou: 7 plus 7, 14, plus 9, 23.

2:05:59 Brennan: Incredible, Ruby, you snatch everything up off the table and can move 20 feet in any direction you want.

2:06:06 Siobhan: So I wanna be moving this way, but I wanna use my Jump, my crazy Jump to Jump so I don't get any opportunity attacks from any of these fuckers who-

2:06:15 Zac: They don't have opportunity attacks-

2:06:16 Ally: They don't get them anyway because of the superiority die.

2:06:17 Siobhan: No, no, no, but-

2:06:18 Brennan: On your next turn.

2:06:19 Siobhan: When my next turn starts to go, so I want to prepare to Jump, basically-

2:06:22 Brennan: You can go 5, 10, 15. You prepare to jump right here, so they won’t get opportunity attacks.

2:06:27 Siobhan: Yeah. Exactly.

2:06:28 Ally: And you grab the map and everything?

2:06:28 Siobhan: Yeah, I got everything in there.

2:06:31 Brennan: Yeah, you, what an incredible use of Maneuvering Attack. I can't fucking believe it-

2:06:35 Ruby: Thanks, Dad.

2:06:38 Amethar: Hey, I learned it from your sister.

2:06:41 Siobhan: I have not attacked a single person.

2:06:43 Brennan: Yeah, you scoop all that intel up, leaving all of the supplies and all the glittering treasure and instead grabbing the intel.

2:06:51 Siobhan: Great.

2:06:53 Brennan: You begin to rush back, that is Amethar's turn. What a fucking turn. (Ally cheers)

2:07:00 Brennan: Oliver Onionpatch is goddamned murdered. This is a battle with one scene from the fucking "Godfather" happening over here.

2:07:07 Ally: Me, looking exactly like him. [calmly holds his crossbow]

2:07:10 Brennan: Exactly, insane.

2:07:10 Ally: He gave me all the info.

2:07:13 Brennan: Yeah, exactly, the townsfolk huddle up. The runes begin to glow.

2:07:16 Ally: Fuck!

2:07:17 Brennan: This golem steps in- Oh, I forgot. On Amethar's turn, Manta Ray takes a bonus action and slips, slides in and skids under your legs.

2:07:30 Amethar: How many did you get--

2:07:31 Manta Ray: Oh, I got two, but a big lumbering bread thing came after-

2:07:34 Amethar: Hey, I feel the same way, I also got two, but then- I mean, all these guys showed up.

2:07:37 Manta Ray: All these guys showed up.

2:07:39 Zac: Can I run inside now?

2:07:40 Brennan: Yes, you can, whoosh, Cumulous, you rush inside. The only people left outside are Ruby, Theo, and Liam, I believe, right?

2:07:51 Emily: And I also sent-

2:07:53 Lou: Swifty to get-

2:07:54 Zac: Does anyone get an attack of opportunity on me?

2:07:56 Emily: Swifty to help Ruby- Although Swifty can just help whoever is having trouble getting in.

2:08:00 Zac: Did anyone get an attack of opportunity on me when I ran by?

2:08:03 Siobhan: No.

2:08:04 Brennan: No, no one did, you had enough movement to make that happen.

2:08:06 Zac: Okay, I was just wondering if (laughs) shenanigans-wise there was something-

2:08:14 Brennan: These golems begin to tear the sugar hut apart. I'm going to make it raw Athletics checks to just- These guys are very strong. To destroy a building is still incredibly hard. I'm going to roll 3d20 in the Box of Doom. If they get a nat 20, they could potentially crack one of the stones.

2:08:34 Murph: Okay. (ominous orchestral music)

2:08:45 Brennan: 5, 10, and a 7.

2:08:45 Ally: Yes! Yeah!

2:08:46 Emily: Yeah, nice and mediocre.

2:08:46 Ally: Yes. (Lou cheers)

2:08:50 Ally: Yes!

2:08:51 Siobhan: Brennan, thank you for rolling so kind of milquetoast today, I appreciate it-

2:08:53 Brennan: I should have been more intense about the surprise round. (Siobhan laughs)

2:08:59 Brennan: But you feel- You see like one of them has these weird like pasta spaghetti arms that like wrap around one of the stones and try to like break it. The golems start bashing the walls, tearing them apart, towns folk are screaming. An invisible Spearia is holding Joren Jawbreaker as Saccharina looks out, Amethar is holding the fucking doorway and shouting to Ruby. This golem lumbers towards Theo and is going to take-

2:09:26 Zac: And you don't have that spell on you anymore, right? 'Cause wasn't it concentration, or was it?

2:09:30 Murph: 'Cause that priest that-

2:09:30 Zac: I killed that-

2:09:30 Murph: That guy’s killed-

2:09:33 Brennan: Yeah, that spell is gone.

2:09:34 Murph: Sweet.

2:09:35 Brennan: But this guy is gonna take his attacks on you and that's a critical hit.

2:09:40 Murph: Okay. Bummer, maybe.

2:09:47 Brennan: You take 15-

2:09:49 Murph: Okay.

2:09:50 Brennan: Points of damage, and then 30 points of damage.

2:09:58 Murph: Yikes, okay.

2:09:59 Brennan: What are you at?

2:10:00 Murph: 51.

2:10:00 Siobhan: Do you not have a Shield reaction?

2:10:01 Lou: 51?

2:10:02 Murph: I do have Shield, but I just want to use it in case you get owned by our Church or something.

2:10:07 Lou: Wait, did you say 51?

2:10:08 Murph: Yeah, I'm a tank, dude.

2:10:08 Lou: Oh, come on, dude. I was all tense—

2:10:12 Brennan: I'm gonna need two Constitution saving throws.

2:10:14 Murph: Oh, no.

2:10:16 Zac: It's just hit point max.

2:10:18 Murph: Ooh, that's really good, that's 25.

2:10:21 Brennan: Okay.

2:10:23 Murph: And yikes, a 10.

2:10:25 Brennan: That second attack, the one that dealt, I believe it was 30, your hit point maximum is reduced by that amount.

2:10:31 Murph: Jesus, by 30?

2:10:32 Brennan: By 30.

2:10:33 Murph: Yikes, okay. So my max is 68.

2:10:37 Brennan: You feel some kind of rot creep into you.

2:10:39 Murph: Great.

2:10:40 Brennan: Theo, that is your turn.

2:10:42 Murph: Okay, I'm gonna hold my turn until Liam and Ruby get in.

2:10:47 Brennan: Okay.

2:10:48 Zac: Is the chocolate dude-

2:10:49 Emily: What about Gooey?

2:10:50 Brennan: Oh, yes, on your turn, Gooey is gonna go 5, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, 35, 40, 45. She's gonna just take the hits, take the swings. She has another handful of weapons. She gets hit, 8 damage from one of the soldiers and the golem-

2:11:11 Saccharina: Gooey, distribute the weapons to the peasants.

2:11:14 Brennan: You see, she says,

2:11:14 Gooey: Look alive. (metal clanking)

2:11:16 Brennan: And just tosses glittering candy weapons through the room. A little kid grabs a magic ax, and you see the kid's eyes go deep, dark purple, and he goes,

2:11:24 Demonic Kid: [whispering, deep voice] I am the voice of the ancient ax.

2:11:27 Amethar: Put that down, put that down.

2:11:28 Demonic Kid: [chopping] I am the voice of the ancient ax.

2:11:32 Cumulous: Cut some of those noodles off.

2:11:37 Brennan: Theo's holding his action.

2:11:41 Emily: Oh, wouldn't this also be Swifty's turn?

2:11:45 Brennan: Yes, Swifty is rushing out-

2:11:49 Emily: Like who needs- I just want him to help whoever needs the most help getting in there.

2:11:54 Brennan: He rushes out to give Ruby a help action 'cause that's the last person you said, and then he darts back in. Liam, walking in, you see Keradin flanked, as you hear the noise of approaching troops.

2:12:08 Ruby: Liam, don't do it.

2:12:09 Brennan: Keradin appears, looks, and sees you at the edge of the light and goes,

2:12:12 Keradin: Heretic.

2:12:16 Ally: And I say back in Bulbian,

2:12:16 Liam: Absolute faker.

2:12:22 Siobhan: You're still the onion guy.

2:12:25 Ally: Oh, yeah, he doesn't know it's me, I'm the onion guy.

2:12:28 Brennan: Rushes in, Grissini runs here, and is going to take his attacks at Amethar. That's a natural 20.

2:12:38 Zac: Can you-

2:12:38 Murph: Jesus. Oh, yeah, I can, I do have a reaction, okay. I'll take, you're pretty hurt, right?

2:12:47 Lou: 28.

2:12:48 Murph: 28, okay, I'll take the hit for my king. My king, I don't want it.

2:12:55 Brennan: 10, 16, 18.

2:12:57 Murph: Yikes.

2:13:00 Brennan: 26.

2:13:01 Murph: Fuck.

2:13:02 Brennan: 33 plus 5 is 38 points of damage.

2:13:06 Murph: Jesus, I am super hurt.

2:13:09 Zac: Do you move inside now?

2:13:10 Lou: Is he inside?

2:13:12 Brennan: Yeah, you've rushed inside, you've used Swirlwarden to rush inside, and the- So you're in, and then these two guys are gonna get attacks of opportunity on you as you do that, they both miss. You rush past Grissini (mimics Grissini’s attack) as he makes his attacks. He's going to grant someone he can see an attack, he's gonna grant one of the archers an attack on Ruby. That's a nat 20.

2:13:40 Emily: Wait, what was Swifty's point, I spent Swifty to go pick her up.

2:13:43 Siobhan: Uncanny Dodge. So I'll take half damage.

2:13:47 Brennan: 7 plus 2 is 9, halved to 4.

2:13:51 Lou: My heart.

2:13:52 Brennan: What is Ruby at?

2:13:52 Ally: A crit, wow. Zac lowers his face to the table. Lou gives him a hug and rubs his chin on his back.

2:13:53 Siobhan: 21.

2:13:53 Brennan: 21, okay. That is going to be Liam's turn.

2:14:03 Theobald: Don't do it, Liam.

2:14:05 Ruby: Don't do it, Liam.

2:14:07 Ally: I still look like the onion, right?

2:14:11 Theobald: We have to go.

2:14:11 Zac: You'll be left alone.

2:14:13 Ally: I just am, did I ask something else? I asked if I look like the onion. Do I look like the onion?

2:14:19 Brennan: I think after, I think it faded as you closed the book and iced Oliver Onionpatch.

2:14:26 Ally: All right, I'm running towards the door- (intense piano music)

2:14:29 Ally: -and I'm trying to jump around this big golem guy.

2:14:34 Brennan: Give me a DC, it needs to be a DC15 acrobatics check.

2:14:38 Ally: Okay, interesting-

2:14:39 Emily: Do you think that any of the armed peasants have taken a shot at the golem?

2:14:44 Ally: For advantage, dude, that kid with the scary knife?

2:14:48 Brennan: Yeah, you get- scary, scary axe kid gives you advantage.

2:14:50 Lou: Thank you.

2:14:50 Ally: Yes. Okay.

2:14:52 Lou: This is a scary roll.

2:14:54 Murph: Jesus.

2:14:55 Ally: Didn't make it.

2:14:56 Brennan: Okay, you use your movement-

2:14:57 Emily: It was a child, anyways.

2:14:58 Brennan: You use your movement to close. Go ahead and count your movement off as you move your mini.

2:15:03 Ally: Okay, okay, let's see. 5, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30.

2:15:10 Zac: How much movement do you have, 30?

2:15:11 Ally: 30.

2:15:12 Brennan: 30, you get 30. You- So that's your movement, you try to muscle past and can't. You still have an action and a bonus action. So you get 30 as your movement. I'm gonna say that you use probably a bonus action dash to try to move past, are not able to move past. You can use your action to try to get past, as well.

2:15:35 Ally: Okay, I guess I'm just gonna attack him.

2:15:39 Zac: Is that what you mean?

2:15:41 Brennan: Or you can use another Acrobatics- You can attempt another Acrobatics check.

2:15:44 Ally: Oh, I got you, yeah, yeah, I would rather do that. Lou sighs in relief.

2:15:47 Ally: So just a-

2:15:48 Brennan: Two, do you roll- You roll advantage.

2:15:50 Ally: Advantage again, okay. I look over to the carrot and I hold up the book that's theirs, and I go,

2:15:57 Liam: [mockingly] Ha. (group cheers)

2:16:04 Ally: Oh, at the very last minute, it moved from like a 7 to a 17, a 1 to a 17.

2:16:12 Brennan: You squeak in at the last fucking second Liam, so it's gonna get a shot at you, hits. Give me a Constitution saving throw. This guy deals 17 points of damage to Liam.

2:16:26 Ally: Oh, there's the one.

2:16:29 Brennan: Your hit point max is reduced by that amount. This golem, as you rush past it, (mimics golem’s attack) slams you into the stone, you collapse-

2:16:34 Ally: For how much?

2:16:35 Brennan: 17 points of damage.

2:16:36 Ally: Okay, cool.

2:16:37 Brennan: And you feel an invisible hand on your face and a voice say,

2:16:43 Spearia: [sighs] Oh, no, they took my sweet baby and made him a war guy.

2:16:51 Brennan: You are in the sugar hut, Ruby, Ruby, Ruby.

2:16:58 Siobhan: 'Tis I.

2:17:01 Brennan: Last one outside the hut.

2:17:03 Siobhan: The Unkilling. (laughs) How far away am I?

2:17:09 Brennan: You are 40 feet.

2:17:15 Siobhan: Dang.

2:17:16 Brennan: Or like 35 feet from the doorway.

2:17:19 Emily: Jump on the golem's head.

2:17:21 Siobhan: Yeah, my Jump is three times my regular Jump length right now, so what is that?

2:17:28 Brennan: It means that you can get airborne, but your movement stays the same. The amount of distance you cover is determined by your speed, not your Jump.

2:17:33 Siobhan: All right, well, that's great. (laughs)

2:17:36 Ally: You got a help action from the gingerbread-

2:17:38 Siobhan: I do have a help action.

2:17:40 Zac: Save it for the entry, right?

2:17:42 Ally: Yeah, yeah. The grappling-

2:17:44 Siobhan: Oh, so what I-

2:17:48 Brennan: You also do have cunning action, that bonus action disengage.

2:17:50 Siobhan: I know, I just want to fucking kill Gristini on my way in, is what I'm trying to think if I- I haven't attacked a single fucking person this whole attack.

2:18:01 Ally: Yeah, but you got the most important amount and you saved my mom.

2:18:04 Murph: Yeah.

2:18:05 Zac: Wouldn't you want to live?

2:18:06 Siobhan: Yes, you're right, I do want to live. That's fine, I live, I'll do the sensible fucking thing.

2:18:15 Ally: I passed up Keradin Deeproot, do you understand?

2:18:19 Siobhan: No, I hear you, I do my full movement with my bonus action disengage. I get into the fucking hut, and we all live.

2:18:26 Brennan: These guys are still blocking the door here, so I am gonna need that Acrobatics.

2:18:32 Siobhan: Okay. Yeah, a 23.

2:18:38 Brennan: Ruby leaps into the sugar hut. (dramatic orchestral music) (Ally whistles)

2:18:42 Brennan: The entire village is packed in here.

2:18:44 Zac: Sorry, I'm gonna put-

2:18:46 Brennan: Yak in there?

2:18:47 Siobhan: Thank you. My bird!

2:18:47 Brennan: Grissini begins to call for the golems to charge, as Keradin turns the corner. You, Liam, stand there holding the book. You've got the map, Amethar and Saccharina are standing here. Caramelinda, the ice melts around her, the runes flow, and you see your father's eyes open up as your mother fades from invisibility, and he goes,

2:19:15 Jawbreaker: Look at you. Something... something good. I'm proud of you, Preston.

2:19:27 Emily: I was so hoping that was gonna happen. (laughs)

2:19:31 Liam: That's my pig’s name.

2:19:34 Brennan: That's all for this week on A Crown of Candy, tune in next week for another exciting episode.

2:19:40 Ally: Yes. (group cheers)

2:19:42 Ally: Damn. [NEXT EPISODE - Episode 13: Family Ties] [NEXT TIME ON DIMENSION 20]

2:19:45 Sugar-Plum Fairy: This temple was made by those very much like yourself in ages long past.

2:19:52 Ruby: The people who killed Preston and the people who killed Jet get to just carry on with their great fucking lives, and we just have to live with it.

2:20:03 Amethar: I'm gonna say it, I'm a bad dad. Not a good—

2:20:06 Ruby: No.

2:20:06 Amethar: No, no.

2:20:08 Spearia: You're half sisters and you just met in the past week. I'm an empath.

2:20:12 Saccharina: I think it's a little more complicated than that.

2:20:15 Spearia: Yeah, it's hard, that's hard.

2:20:19 Ruby: Did you kill my sister? Transcribed by Kyber Bonsai and Tillie the Paladin Edited by Tillie the Paladin, Kyber Bonsai, and solsys