The War of Bugs and Rats

0:00:00 Kugrash: I wasn't always a rat.

0:00:01 Kingston: [gasps] What?

0:00:02 Kugrash: My real name is Bruce.

0:00:04 Alejandro: Nod is the spirit of hope and dreams. Sometimes referred to as the Monarch of the Sixth Borough.

0:00:13 Kingston: What's going on with Lazarus?

0:00:15 Willy: Emma Lazarus, she wrote the poems described in that woman's book.

0:00:21 Brennan: You are, phew, knocked back against the wall. [magical shimmering] The mirror fills your bedroom with light. Standing on the other side of the mirror is Titania, Queen of the Faeries.

0:00:33 Siobhan: I kneel. [chittering] [cracking] [dramatic music]

0:00:38 Brennan: All the people around you are beginning to turn insectoid.

0:00:42 Alejandro: You let them out?

0:00:43 Pete: Yeah, in the dream! I was just selling!

0:00:44 Alejandro: [yelling] Peter, what you do in the dream matters!

0:00:48 Brennan: You guys wash up out of the subway steps and hear the jittering of strange insects. [jittering]

0:00:54 Ally: I hate bugs. [END RECAP] [dramatic music]

0:01:04 Brennan: All right, you guys ready?

0:01:05 Murph: Yes.

0:01:05 Lou: Mhm.

0:01:06 Ally: Yeah!

0:01:06 Emily: Yeah!

0:01:06 Zac: Yeah!

0:01:07 Brennan: Here we go. Hell yeah. Welcome back, one and all, to The Unsleeping City. I am your dungeon master, Brennan Lee Mulligan. These are our intrepid heroes. Say hi, intrepid heroes.

0:01:16 All: Hi, intrepid heroes.

0:01:19 Brennan: Last we left off, [tense music] our brave adventurers had been scattered around the city. Some in a lovely penthouse, some at the Clinton Hill chantry, some in the sewers, some all the way in Staten Island in a bar.

0:01:34 Emily: [points at Brennan] Because of you, you did it to me!

0:01:36 Ally: That was harsh.

0:01:36 Emily: I had plans.

0:01:39 Brennan: As you guys rush through the Steinway Street subway entrance, you guys are, by the way, are all the way out in Astoria, Queens. You're rushing up to the subway. You guys can feel, specifically Kugrash, Misty, and Kingston, you guys can feel the Umbral Arcana is rent here. There is nothing keeping people from seeing the horrors of the dream world entering this place, and you see that all of the tears in the Umbral Arcana here are connected as though by strings to their puppet master, Pete. Pete, your body is just pulsating with magic that appears to be keeping this place open, keeping this like—

0:02:24 Ally: Fuck.

0:02:26 Brennan: This place opens. As you guys leap up the steps, you guys see that you sort of all congregate here and meet at the same. Perhaps some of Kingston's city magic as the train rushes, you get all off the thing. All of you look well-rested except for Sofia.

0:02:39 Emily: I've got a CamelBak that I've like, shoved a box wine into.

0:02:43 Lou: Oh my god.

0:02:44 Siobhan: So horrifying.

0:02:44 Emily: So I kinda almost look like a Ghostbuster. [laughing] But with box wine.

0:02:49 Brennan: Hell yeah. You guys rush up out of the subway. You hear muffled screams and chittering. You feel the presence. Insides of the buildings are covered in horrifying, gross webs. [insects buzzing] You look around you and you see a horrifying wasp centaur woman rise up into the air.

0:03:15 Emily: It doesn't look like Epona, does it?

0:03:17 Brennan: No, it does not look like Epona.

0:03:19 Emily: Okay.

0:03:20 Brennan: You see that this woman rises up into the air. You see that she looks at you guys and goes--

0:03:31 Wasp Centaur: [threatening insect noises] [stereotypical perky white woman voice] Oh my God, what are you guys doing here? Hi, Pete!

0:03:38 Pete: Hey, what's your name again?

0:03:40 Wasp Centaur: Becky.

0:03:41 Pete: Becky, what's up?

0:03:43 Becky: Hey, um, welcome to the neighborhood. Me and my friends are moving in. Thank you so much for, like, helping us out and like, giving us the heads-up. This place is awesome.

0:03:53 Brennan: You hear, boom, boom, down the street, as you can hear, like-- [slurping] Cocoons being unraveled as these insects spread. [chittering]

0:04:02 Misty: I've heard of gentrification, but this is crazy.

0:04:06 Pete: Oh, god fucking damn it.

0:04:07 Kugrash: Pete, what are you doin'?

0:04:08 Pete: I'm sorry, man, I, uh--

0:04:10 Sofia: Wanna come clean to us?

0:04:13 Pete: I invited them here in a dream. I thought I was just selling 'em drugs, fuck, fuck, fuck.

0:04:18 Brennan: You see that she says,

0:04:20 Becky: You don't want us to leave, do you?

0:04:24 Pete: You're kinda trashing the neighborhood.

0:04:27 Becky: Um, what are you talking about? These hives are gorgeous. If anything, the property values of rent here are going up.

0:04:32 Pete: No.

0:04:35 Ricky: But you're forcing the community out.

0:04:37 Becky: We're not forcing them out, we're forcing them in. To cocoons, to eat. [slurping]

0:04:41 Sofia: Okay, yeah.

0:04:42 Pete: Great, there it is, there it is. What are you gonna order, a flat white?

0:04:47 Becky: The only flat white around here is gonna be you.

0:04:50 Ricky: Stop.

0:04:50 Becky: When this bug tramples you! [laughing]

0:04:53 Brennan: You see, she goes, whomp. It appears that Becky is some kind of sorceress force that is anchoring these bug monsters to this realm using Pete's magic. You sort of hear this, see, there's a giant fucking beetle monster down the way. [chittering] With a hard hat on, who goes like,

0:05:18 Beetle: Oh, yeah, we can knock these buildings down real easy and make giant mounds. Really beautiful luxury mounds to live in.

0:05:28 Brennan: You see—

0:05:29 Ally: God damn it.

0:05:30 Brennan: Becky is going to act first.

0:05:35 Ally: Of course she is.

0:05:36 Brennan: Let's see what this does here.

0:05:39 Siobhan: Oh no, that's a big old circle. [group groaning]

0:05:41 Emily: We should have stayed spread out enough.

0:05:43 Murph: I'd just put out more.

0:05:44 Emily: We could've only each moved one step, though. There's no way we could have...

0:05:48 Zac: It would automatically have started like that, right?

0:05:50 Lou: Inevitable, inevitable.

0:05:52 Brennan: So you see that Becky gets on her phone and says,

0:05:56 Becky: Bugs, there's some really fucking weird people here. I'm not sure what they're doing. I'm gonna need them all dead. [chittering] [intense music]

0:06:03 Brennan: And these horrible mandible claws click in her mouth and she belches a colossal cloud [smoke blowing] of the most stinking, acrid, insectoid smoke. [blowing] Just covers the area. You guys are all obscured in it, and Becky disappears from sight. Anyone here can make a Perception check that wants to.

0:06:27 Lou: I mean, you know I will.

0:06:29 Siobhan: 11.

0:06:30 Lou: 27.

0:06:32 Ally: 18, no bonus.

0:06:33 Brennan: 27?

0:06:34 Lou: 27.

0:06:35 Siobhan: Hell yeah.

0:06:36 Brennan: Becky, you can hear her flying directly overhead, [buzzing] into this weird burrowed hole.

0:06:42 Kingston: She's behind us in some weird burrowed hole!

0:06:47 Brennan: That is going to be Kingston's turn. On the beginning of your turn, I'm gonna need a Constitution saving throw.

0:06:52 Lou: Okay, great.

0:06:52 Ally: Fuck.

0:06:55 Lou: Uh, 14?

0:06:57 Brennan: 14 saves.

0:06:59 Emily: Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo.

0:07:01 Brennan: You, man, see what's happening, holds your breath. You are still within the cloud of noxious smoke.

0:07:08 Lou: Can I step out of it, or can I move? Is it possible to move out of it?

0:07:13 Brennan: You made your save so you don't breathe any smoke. You're unaffected, you can try to get out of it.

0:07:17 Lou: Great, I'm gonna take 6, right?

0:07:20 Brennan: And I can show you the area of it. It's like, right here.

0:07:24 Lou: Three, four, five, six, so I'm out there.

0:07:27 Brennan: Cool.

0:07:27 Lou: Great, and then I will cast Bless on Pete, Ricky, and Sofie Bikes.

0:07:36 Brennan: You can target more than three people if you use higher spell slots.

0:07:39 Lou: Yeah, but I only care about three of the... Are you better at Constitution? What's your Con mod?

0:07:46 Murph: Uh, 1.

0:07:48 Brennan: So, you hit Sofia, Ricky, and—

0:07:51 Lou: I would like to cast Bless as a second-level spell.

0:07:54 Emily: Whoo!

0:07:55 Lou: And I will add Kugrash to the Bless.

0:07:57 Kugrash: Yeah. ‘Preciate it.

0:07:57 Ally: Can you just add one person when you're adding a new spell slot?

0:08:00 Lou: I could cast it as a third-level spell and add a fifth person, but that's too.

0:08:03 Siobhan: I'm good.

0:08:04 Lou: She's good.

0:08:05 Brennan: Cool.

0:08:06 Kingston: Misty's been around.

0:08:06 Misty: I've been around.

0:08:08 Kingston: This woman can take care of herself.

0:08:09 Brennan: Wonderful, all right. That's your movement, that's your action. That is Kingston's turn. It is now Pete's turn. Pete, I'm gonna need you to make a Constitution saving throw at the beginning of your turn.

0:08:17 Ally: What do I add to that?

0:08:18 Lou: With Bless.

0:08:19 Brennan: Uh, your Constitution save is here. I believe it's--

0:08:23 Ally: Oh, fun, a 5.

0:08:24 Brennan: 5, not bad, and you add Bless to it.

0:08:26 Emily: Whoo.

0:08:28 Murph: Sweet.

0:08:28 Ally: Yeah, there we go. All right, 19 plus 5, 24.

0:08:31 Brennan: You don't hold your breath, but this doesn't have any effect on you at the moment. It's part of your dream magic. You invited these bugs in.

0:08:40 Ally: Cool, can I make a Perception check to find out like, can I move? How am I attached to this? Can I try to figure out the workings of-?

0:08:46 Brennan: Uh, give me an Arcana check.

0:08:48 Ally: Okay, yeah, Arcana, I have 1. Damn it, 3.

0:08:51 Brennan: 3.

0:08:53 Ally: Fuck.

0:08:55 Brennan: You, as Alejandro said earlier, study, get your powers under your control, find a way to do them, and you don't know what it is you can do.

0:09:05 Ally: Okay, can I try to hop up on here?

0:09:10 Zac: That's so high.

0:09:11 Siobhan: Yeah, no way.

0:09:12 Brennan: That would be a pretty wild Athletics check. You're welcome to make it if you like. It will likely fail, and if it fails, you will stay in the cloud and have to make the save again. Also, as long as you're in the cloud, you can't really see.

0:09:27 Ally: Right, right, right, okay, cool.

0:09:28 Emily: I was planning on getting up there anyways, and I have better Athletics.

0:09:30 Ally: Oh, yeah, 'cause you actually have Athletics.

0:09:33 Emily: And Acrobatics.

0:09:33 Ally: Okay, um… Let's see, so, is Kingston yelling anything? Like, should I follow you out that way?

0:09:41 Lou: I mean, I need to know if there are people inside who are in trouble, so that's my motivation for moving that way. You know, I don't know if you wanna kill bugs, if you wanna chase this woman with me, but you know Pete.

0:09:58 Ally: I'm following Kingston, yeah. I'll go, can I do like a Dash action and try to catch up with him?

0:10:03 Brennan: So you have a movement and you take six squares of movement and get out of the stinking cloud. You can take another movement if you want with your action because you have not used your action yet.

0:10:13 Ally: Okay.

0:10:14 Brennan: Now you see this roiling cloud of noxious insect whatever. [smoke blowing]

0:10:22 Zac: 6 gets you out of the thing, right?

0:10:23 Ally: Yeah, I'll do 6 to get out of it and then I'll do--

0:10:26 Siobhan: Don't you have Dispel Magic?

0:10:30 Ally: I don't.

0:10:30 Siobhan: As your, um--

0:10:32 Ally: Oh yeah, I do, Dispel Magic?

0:10:34 Siobhan: Yeah.

0:10:34 Ally: I'll do that.

0:10:35 Brennan: Oh, on the stinking cloud? Hell yeah, hold on one second.

0:10:39 Emily: Ooh.

0:10:39 Murph: Sweet.

0:10:40 Ally: That's a great idea.

0:10:41 Brennan: And do you wanna still move?

0:10:43 Ally: Uh… Yeah, yeah, I'll be next to Kingston, but still, I cast Dispel Magic on the cloud.

0:10:51 Siobhan: Man, look at how cool you are.

0:10:54 Lou: God, look at those coat blues.

0:10:55 Ally: Level three or lower and four and higher on a roll.

0:10:58 Brennan: Uh, hell yeah, Pete, you raise up your hand. Where do you go to in your head as you're like, asking to try and get rid of this magic?

0:11:06 Ally: I think I'm still thinking about that fucking guy who talked about like, the bubbles and my dad. I'm trying to figure out who Robert is, so I'm just kind of like, fuck Robert. [laughing] [whooshing]

0:11:18 Brennan: You see that the wind picks up and this smoke is sucked away. Nobody else needs to make saving throws.

0:11:25 Emily: Ooh!

0:11:26 Brennan: It's gone, phew. Yes, the magic is gone. I need you to make a Wild Magic check for me, if you could be so kind.

0:11:30 Ally: Yeah, right.

0:11:31 Brennan: 1, 2, or 3 does it.

0:11:31 Ally: 18.

0:11:32 Brennan: 18, cool. Now it's 1, 2, 3, 4.

0:11:34 Ally: Oh, it keeps going past a long rest?

0:11:37 Brennan: Oh, it keeps going past a long rest, yes, absolutely. It builds up.

0:11:39 Ally: Great.

0:11:41 Brennan: That's now going to be Ricky's turn.

0:11:46 Zac: Is there a door over here?

0:11:48 Siobhan: Yeah, there's one right here.

0:11:49 Emily: There is like a hole right here.

0:11:50 Brennan: There's a hole over there. The hole is open. Ricky, you can see from the door, the door is there. It is webbed and gunked up, so you could bust through it. There's like an open entrance near Kingston and then there's a gunked up one that's all like, webbed over at the front

0:12:04 Emily: And Ricky is no stranger to...

0:12:06 Siobhan: There's also two bugs right here, just so you know.

0:12:08 Zac: Two bugs right up there?

0:12:09 Siobhan: Yeah, two very gross-looking bugs.

0:12:10 Lou: And then the big old beetle.

0:12:11 Siobhan: And then the big old beetle is right over here.

0:12:14 Zac: I think we should try to stay together, feels right. I'm gonna use my Channel Divinity to use Sacred Weapon.

0:12:25 Brennan: Cool, as your action, great. [shimmering]

0:12:26 Zac: And then I'm gonna run to follow, I'm gonna see if I can climb up on the roof, too.

0:12:31 Emily: Yeah, do it.

0:12:32 Brennan: Cool, it's not built for climbing. Go ahead and give me a DC 15 Athletics check.

0:12:40 Zac: Okay, cool. Uh, 24.

0:12:45 Brennan: Hell yeah. It's half movement getting up there, so I'm gonna say that you just get up here onto the corner.

0:12:53 Zac: Okay, cool. And that's my turn, I guess, yeah.

0:12:59 Brennan: Hell yeah, Sacred Weapon, you hop up on the roof. That's now going to be, ba-ba-bum, uh, beetle.

0:13:09 Siobhan: Mm, damn it.

0:13:10 Lou: Don't like that name.

0:13:13 Brennan: So let's see here. Five, ten, fifteen, twenty, twenty-five, thirty, thirty-five, forty.

0:13:20 Lou: Oh, shit.

0:13:21 Brennan: You see that the beetle looks at you and says,

0:13:24 Beetle: Uh, hey bud, this is a construction zone. I'm gonna have to kill ya.

0:13:33 Brennan: And proceeds to--

0:13:35 Ally: Hoo, fuck!

0:13:37 Kugrash: He's not a regular beetle. Regular beetles are pretty friendly. And adorable.

0:13:42 Ricky: I don't think that's how that job works.

0:13:44 Brennan: If he reaches you, oh boy. Five, ten, fifteen, twenty.

0:13:46 Zac: Really?

0:13:51 Brennan: twenty-five, thirty, thirty-five, forty. [chittering] He makes it here, 'cause he's--

0:13:53 Lou: Jesus.

0:13:55 Brennan: [crashing] This enormous beetle's just fucking rushing you.

0:13:59 Siobhan: Gross.

0:14:01 Brennan: That's the beetle's turn. That's now going to be Kugrash.

0:14:07 Murph: Oh, shit. Umm. Hmm hmm hmm.

0:14:13 Ally: Fuck.

0:14:14 Murph: Ricky's in trouble up there.

0:14:15 Ally: Yeah, yeah, fuck.

0:14:17 Murph: I'm guessing I don't have any kind of line of sight up here. Okay, here's what I'll do. I am going to use a bonus action to Misty Step up to here. Can I do that, 30 feet?

0:14:31 Brennan: Cool, yeah, for sure.

0:14:32 Murph: Sweet, okay, I Misty Step up here, bam. [magical shimmering] Like a really gross Nightcrawler.

0:14:38 Brennan: A little blast of stinky sewer steam pops up.

0:14:43 Kugrash: Oh hey, Ricky, we're so fucked.

0:14:46 Murph: And then that's a bonus action, and then as an action, I'm gonna use my crown's ability and conjure up four rat swarms. [dramatic royal music]

0:14:59 Kugrash: I summon you, my babies. Defend your true king and defend the city! You pieces of shit, I love you.

0:15:07 Siobhan: Rats versus bugs!

0:15:07 Brennan: Hell yeah.

0:15:09 Ally: Ugh, New York, honestly.

0:15:11 Siobhan: The greatest city in the world!

0:15:12 Ally: Greatest city in the world.

0:15:13 Brennan: Where are you summoning these bad boys?

0:15:15 Murph: Right around my dude here and I want 'em to attack 'em.

0:15:17 Rats: To arms! [dramatic music] To arms, my brothers! The Rat King calls and his people shall answer! Let the banners unfurl! Let the clarion trumpets call! A war, a glorious war! Let the war of bugs and rats be determined today!

0:15:32 Kugrash: Yeah, we're just killin' some fuckin' bugs, buddy, it's fine.

0:15:35 Rats: Let them sing of this day for eons to come!

0:15:38 Kugrash: Yeah, I think they're gonna forget about us. All of us, even the Rat King.

0:15:42 Brennan: Hell yeah, would they, would that spell--

0:15:45 Murph: I know with Conjure Animals--

0:15:48 Brennan: Do they attack on the turn or no?

0:15:50 Murph: Summoned creatures are friendly to you and your companions. Roll initiative for the summoned creatures as a group, which has its own turn, they obey- okay. So would I need to roll initiative for them?

0:15:58 Brennan: Yeah, go ahead and roll initiative. Let me know what you get.

0:16:02 Murph: God damn it, 5. Okay, so they probably go after me, which is kinda good, actually.

0:16:08 Brennan: Cool.

0:16:09 Siobhan: Wait, did I get skipped? Because like, my initiative is 12.

0:16:13 Emily: Mine is 7.

0:16:14 Brennan: Oh, and we're at Kugrash already? Misty, yes, I'm sorry, that's gonna be your turn now.

0:16:20 Siobhan: Okay, great. So, I am going to move over to my pals over here. And then I'm gonna, do I have line of sight for this?

0:16:41 Brennan: Beetle up there?

0:16:41 Siobhan: Big boy up here.

0:16:42 Brennan: No, you do not.

0:16:43 Siobhan: In which case, I… Don't have anything useful to do right now.

0:16:50 Emily: You could buff yourself somehow.

0:16:52 Siobhan: Yeah, I'm just gonna turn to Pete and say,

0:16:56 Misty: Darling, this hat, it's really working for you. A lot of people couldn't wear a hat like this. It looks great. [magical shimmering]

0:17:02 Pete: Oh my god.

0:17:03 Siobhan: And I give you Bardic Inspiration, which is a d8.

0:17:05 Pete: Yo, thank you.

0:17:07 Brennan: Wonderful. Kugrash and Misty have gone. Now, it's gonna be our little roach friends. [tense music] These guys close in. [chittering]

0:17:19 Siobhan: What were you, Kugrash?

0:17:20 Murph: 7, but it just went out of order a little bit.

0:17:22 Siobhan: Mm, right, because--

0:17:23 Emily: I'm 7 also though.

0:17:25 Zac: I think we just gotta chase this sorceress down.

0:17:28 Ally: Yeah.

0:17:29 Zac: I think we gotta get away from this, 'cause she was like--

0:17:31 Ally: You guys are pretty close, I think, to her hole.

0:17:35 Siobhan: Yeah, she has a hole right here. Butthole 2: Electric Boogaloo.

0:17:41 Zac: I wonder if I could just like, break through the roof.

0:17:44 Emily: Can I use a ki point not on my turn?

0:17:46 Brennan: I don't think so unless it says you can use it as a reaction. These two are coming for ya, ba-ba-bum. Both roaches miss, they kinda-- [chittering] These are the least human of them. They seem sorta like half-finished and more like dream energy than the other bugs do, and they both go to attack you. And that's the roaches' turn. That's going to be, ba-ba-ba, Sofia, that's you.

0:18:18 Emily: Okay, I am going to… Let me just decide if this is definitely what I wanna do. Oh wait, what is it? I just have to confirm that I can do one thing. So, can I confirm with you? So, I have my Drunken Technique, which means if I use a Flurry of Blows, I get the benefit of a disengage, which means I get my full action, but it says I think I also get an extra—

0:18:41 Brennan: Your full move, yeah.

0:18:42 Emily: Do I get a full movement and it increases by 10 feet?

0:18:44 Brennan: Correct.

0:18:45 Emily: Okay, so I almost get like a whole extra movement.

0:18:48 Brennan: Yeah.

0:18:49 Emily: All right, I'm gonna… These guys are too tiny, though. I don't need to Flurry of Blows them. Okay, there's not any kind of, it's kinda like, if I Flurry of Blows one guy and like absolutely wreck him, that's just life, right?

0:19:04 Brennan: Yeah, you're within range of two of them.

0:19:06 Emily: So I could like kinda distribute it between?

0:19:08 Brennan: You could distribute it, yeah.

0:19:09 Emily: Okay, I'll do that then. All right, so. Does a 21 and a 26 hit?

0:19:21 Brennan: Yes.

0:19:22 Emily: Okay, um, sorry, I need things, d8. So that is 12.

0:19:32 Brennan: Okay.

0:19:34 Emily: 6.

0:19:38 Brennan: The first one, you absolutely just, bam! Crush this bug under your foot. You guys see that Sofia is fighting not like normal. You're like full tipsy swaying.

0:19:50 Emily: I got my CamelBak hanging out of my mouth.

0:19:52 Brennan: Just a drip of Franzia, yeah.

0:19:55 Ally: Ugh.

0:19:56 Brennan: Great, and you injure the other.

0:19:58 Emily: Okay, well, I still haven't done my Flurry of Blows. Those were my two attacks. Now I'm trying to do.

0:20:03 Brennan: Now you do two.

0:20:06 Emily: Does a 23 hit and does a 17 hit?

0:20:09 Brennan: They both hit.

0:20:12 Emily: So I'm gonna hit him for another 16.

0:20:15 Brennan: Boom, boom. Yeah, just a flurry of like, you're like balling up your fists but your arms are more like ropes, so you're just like, bah-bah-bah-bah.

0:20:26 Emily: And then I wanna use my disengage from my Step of the Wind and I just wanna book it for this ooze hole.

0:20:29 Murph: Oh, shit.

0:20:32 Ally: Nice.

0:20:32 Brennan: Hell yeah. So you can move 50 on that disengage.

0:20:35 Emily: Two, three, four.

0:20:35 Zac: That's great.

0:20:39 Emily: Five, okay, so I get right up to the mouth of it.

0:20:42 Brennan: Hell yeah.

0:20:44 Emily: So I'm knocking in, I'm saying,

0:20:44 Sofia: Hello, I'm out here. [tense music]

0:20:47 Brennan: You see the interior of a very dark bodega inside there.

0:20:52 Emily: Okay, is there a cat? [Ally laughing]

0:20:56 Brennan: Make a Perception check for me.

0:20:59 Siobhan: Cute!

0:20:59 Emily: Okay, uh, 16.

0:21:02 Brennan: There is. You feel a sensation of a cat somewhere in the bodega.

0:21:06 Emily: I need to save the cat.

0:21:08 Ally: Hey, I hear that's a great structure for a screenplay.

0:21:13 Murph: Good God.

0:21:15 Brennan: That's gonna be the swarms, these rat swarms.

0:21:17 Murph: Oh, yeah. Do I roll for 'em or do you?

0:21:20 Brennan: You can go ahead and roll for 'em.

0:21:22 Murph: Sweet. Okay, what are there, four of them? I'll just roll. They only get plus 2 to attack.

0:21:27 Kugrash: Come on, you little pieces of shit.

0:21:29 Murph: Oh, God! I rolled an 8, an 8, and a 4. I suck so bad, and a 5! What?

0:21:36 Siobhan: You want me to roll for the rats?

0:21:39 Murph: Yes, I do!

0:21:46 Brennan: The rats are uneffective against the giant real estate beetle.

0:21:49 Emily: They're so righteous but so bad.

0:21:51 Murph: I can't believe that.

0:21:53 Emily: Oh my God.

0:21:54 Murph: I'm the worst fuckin' roller.

0:21:57 Lou: That’s tough. That's to four dice.

0:21:59 Murph: I might have Siobhan be my designated roller and just be like, Just roll initiative for me, please.

0:22:06 Brennan: I'm going to need Sofia at the door there to make a--

0:22:13 Emily: Okay. Dexterity saving throw?

0:22:13 Brennan: Constitution saving throw.

0:22:14 Emily: Okay.

0:22:14 Lou: You're blessed.

0:22:15 Emily: Oh, I'm blessed, I forgot to even add that!

0:22:18 Murph: Oh wait, no, my rats aren't blessed, it's okay.

0:22:20 Lou: Oh, your rats aren't blessed.

0:22:21 Emily: This is gonna fuckin' come into serious play.

0:22:22 Lou: I ain't got time to bless all them damn rats.

0:22:25 Emily: Ooh, oh my god, just try and fuckin' touch me. Just try and fucking touch me with a 25, bitch!

0:22:32 Brennan: Um, hell yeah.

0:22:34 Emily: But do I still take half damage?

0:22:36 Brennan: You do still take half damage.

0:22:37 Emily: God damn it.

0:22:43 Brennan: You take… You take 22 points of damage. [health bar noise]

0:22:49 Lou: That's half damage?

0:22:49 Emily: Halved?

0:22:50 Brennan: That's half damage.

0:22:52 Zac: Wait, what hit you?

0:22:53 Ally: Fuck. [Emily screaming]

0:22:55 Lou: What the fuck is in there?

0:22:56 Emily: What the fuck is in there?

0:22:57 Murph: I can't fight whatever that thing is.

0:22:58 Emily: If anyone wants to come help me.

0:23:00 Brennan: You see, appearing in the bodega, eyes glowing-

0:23:03 Emily: Was it the fucking cat?

0:23:05 Brennan: No, it's Becky, the wasp, who goes—

0:23:09 Becky: Hey, um, I don't know, but we try to keep things a little bit quiet in this neighborhood, and you're like, actively drunk out on the street, so maybe you should get out.

0:23:18 Brennan: [whooshing] And you see that your skin tightens, hardens, [squelching] and dries, and she just--

0:23:22 Emily: Ooh, I look good though, right, Botox?

0:23:24 Brennan: No, she sucks the water out of your body and you take 22 points of damage.

0:23:26 Sofia: Honestly, thank you, I'm about to have my period, so I'm carrying some water weight. Thank you, that's good for me.

0:23:32 Brennan: You see that she, buzz, [buzzing] flies deeper into the hive of buildings.

0:23:36 Pete: Fuckin' fuck, ugh, gross.

0:23:38 Brennan: That's gonna be Kingston.

0:23:40 Lou: Okay, I'm gonna run right up to Sofie Bikes and be like,

0:23:45 Kingston: Damn, you look good.

0:23:48 Sofia: Oh my God, thank you.

0:23:49 Kingston: But not for good reasons,

0:23:51 Lou: And then Cure Wounds. [magical shimmering]

0:23:53 Emily: Does all my water weight come back?

0:23:57 Ally: And I'm like,

0:23:57 Pete: Honestly, healthy, ey.

0:24:01 Lou: This is a d8, right? This is what a d8 looks like, great. Oh, 2 plus spellcasting ability.

0:24:05 Brennan: 5.

0:24:09 Lou: 5, so 9, is that it?

0:24:11 Brennan: 7.

0:24:13 Lou: Uh, 7, there you go.

0:24:14 Emily: Thank you. [health bar whirring]

0:24:15 Lou: It's not enough, but it's a start.

0:24:17 Emily: Yeah, but it takes me from half my hit points to...

0:24:19 Ally: Yeah, fuck.

0:24:21 Lou: Yeah, and I guess, is there any way I can peer into, can I like, get a look at what this area looks like?

0:24:26 Brennan: Yeah, it looks like a webbed-up bodega. [insects chittering] You hear some chittering from inside it, but you could move into it.

0:24:31 Ally: Let's get in there.

0:24:32 Lou: Uh, I'll take a step in, I'll take a step in, yeah. [ominous music]

0:24:36 Brennan: Ooh, doctor.

0:24:37 Emily: Where's the cat?

0:24:39 Ally: Oh, what are those? Oh, those are people from my dream, fuck.

0:24:45 Emily: What's this blob?

0:24:46 Lou: Do I have to walk in?

0:24:47 Emily: Oh, it's a cocoon, I bet. I bet this is a cocoon.

0:24:50 Ally: I hate this. Oh, that dude's fucked.

0:24:54 Siobhan: Oh, this poor deli owner.

0:24:56 Lou: Is that a real person?

0:24:56 Ally: Yeah, yeah.

0:24:57 Siobhan: He came to this country to have a better life.

0:25:00 Emily: Is this a person in a cocoon?

0:25:02 Brennan: It's something in a cocoon.

0:25:03 Emily: Okay. That is where I'm gonna go next.

0:25:05 Siobhan: Oh no.

0:25:05 Ally: Here we go.

0:25:07 Zac: I gotta get that sorceress.

0:25:07 Brennan: Cool, Kingston, go ahead and make your movement into the place. I actually can't see from here. Are there any bugs in this little row?

0:25:13 Siobhan: No, no.

0:25:14 Brennan: Cool, Kingston, go ahead and take your movement.

0:25:15 Lou: Okay, great, I'll come in--

0:25:17 Brennan: You're gonna lose five feet of movement going through the hole, just so you know.

0:25:19 Lou: Okay, so if I start, I don't know, one...

0:25:25 Brennan: Two, three.

0:25:26 Lou: Two, three, four, five, six.

0:25:30 Brennan: You're not gonna be able to get around the other side. That's a wall back here, so if you wanna go--

0:25:33 Lou: That's fine, I'm just trying to put as much distance between me and everything else as I possibly can.

0:25:37 Brennan: Okay, so you're not trying to go around the corner. You're like, moving back into the bodega for a second.

0:25:40 Lou: Just back, yeah, exactly.

0:25:41 Brennan: Gotcha, cool, cool, cool. Awesome, you move in, you cast your Cure Wounds. That's Kingston's turn. Pete, that's you.

0:25:47 Ally: Okay, great. Okay, I go in.

0:25:51 Brennan: Go ahead and take your six squares of movement. If someone else wants to get Pete that's closer to that hole.

0:25:56 Siobhan: Let's see. One, two, three, four, five, six. So, you're basically just in the hole.

0:26:00 Brennan: Just inside.

0:26:01 Ally: All right, great. Can I, uh… Okay, I'm gonna cast, I'm gonna use a sorcery point to do a Careful Spell.

0:26:09 Brennan: Awesome, yep.

0:26:11 Ally: And I'm gonna exclude the five people from our campaign. Do they have to be in eyesight to exclude them in Careful?

0:26:20 Brennan: Um, no, I think you can actually pick them. If you know their name, that's a way to do it, yeah.

0:26:24 Ally: Great, I'm gonna do that and then I'm gonna cast Fireball on this bodega.

0:26:27 Murph: Ooh!

0:26:28 Siobhan: Fuck, man.

0:26:29 Emily: Ooh, yeah, man. Setting it on fire.

0:26:31 Murph: Fucking epic.

0:26:32 Emily: Wait, hey, what about the people in cocoons? Can you Careful Spell them?

0:26:35 Ally: I can only Careful Spell up to five people.

0:26:37 Brennan: Well, here's the thing. Fireball, I don't believe can go through solid objects. So walls and ceilings, it can't go through, so you don't need to actually worry about Misty or Ricky or Kugrash or other people like that if you don't want to.

0:26:52 Murph: Yeah, we're up on the roof and these guys are outside.

0:26:54 Zac: So, exclude us.

0:26:55 Brennan: So, take this, put it where you want to put it, and then if anyone's inside it, go ahead, in that red.

0:27:00 Ally: It's so fun, it's huge.

0:27:01 Brennan: It's enormous. You're a monster, you're a nightmare. Go ahead and yeah, put it where you want to put it, and then anyone who's within it, you can make your call to exclude them or not.

0:27:10 Murph: It's just the deli owner, right? If you try to hit these guys.

0:27:12 Ally: Yep, that's it, all right, cool. So then I'll exclude Kugrash.

0:27:16 Zac: You could just do that, right?

0:27:17 Murph: Yeah, we're up here.

0:27:18 Zac: You could almost not have to use it, right?

0:27:20 Emily: Yeah, I think--

0:27:21 Ally: What do you mean?

0:27:22 Siobhan: There's just the deli owner.

0:27:22 Emily: You might not need to use Careful.

0:27:24 Brennan: You will have to do it to save the deli owner.

0:27:26 Ally: I'll do it to save the deli owner and us, 'cause then we can run through it and not have to, we can try to get to that other pod.

0:27:33 Emily: Right.

0:27:33 Brennan: Cool.

0:27:34 Murph: Oh, if there's a fire.

0:27:34 Brennan: Oh, and if you want to pick other people, they won't have to worry about running through the flames in other words, gotcha.

0:27:38 Ally: Yeah, yeah, so I put everyone in the campaign but Kugrash, and I use that exclude for the deli owner.

0:27:43 Siobhan: And Ricky probably, right? Because he's on the roof.

0:27:46 Brennan: Cool, you burn your sorcery point.

0:27:46 Ally: But I include Ricky so he can run in later.

0:27:48 Brennan: Cool, go ahead and roll 5d6 damage.

0:27:51 Murph: Yeah.

0:27:51 Ally: Fuck yeah.

0:27:53 Murph: You need more?

0:27:53 Ally: Please, oh, it's 8d6.

0:27:56 Brennan: Fireball?

0:27:56 Ally: Is what mine says.

0:27:57 Brennan: Fireball's 8d6?

0:27:59 Ally: Let me find it.

0:28:00 Brennan: Hold on one second.

0:28:02 Lou: We about to get--

0:28:03 Murph: 8d6 fire damage on a failed Dex save.

0:28:05 Brennan: Jesus!

0:28:06 Ally: And it's half on a pass.

0:28:07 Brennan: 5E, you crazy.

0:28:10 Ally: Thank you.

0:28:10 Brennan: Cool, 8d6.

0:28:11 Ally: I just need one more. Oh, can I use two of yours?

0:28:13 Murph: Uh, I got three for ya.

0:28:14 Ally: Oh, thank you.

0:28:15 Brennan: And there's what, two roaches in there?

0:28:18 Ally: Yeah, two pincer guys.

0:28:20 Brennan: Two little pincer guys, oh no--

0:28:21 Ally: And then one tiny roach.

0:28:23 Brennan: Oh, the two bugsters over there, gotcha.

0:28:26 Siobhan: Bugsters?

0:28:26 Ally: Like hipster bugs?

0:28:27 Brennan: Hipster bugs, yeah.

0:28:27 Siobhan: You fucker.

0:28:28 Ally: Alright, cool. 8d6, did they— Oh, we don’t know if they passed their Constitution yet?

0:28:33 Brennan: We don't know yet, just go ahead and roll. Tell me how—

0:28:34 Ally: Bitch! Uh, all right.

0:28:37 Siobhan: Oh my God, so much math.

0:28:38 Ally: 10, that's, uh, 19, 25 damage.

0:28:44 Brennan: 25 damage.

0:28:44 Emily: Ooh!

0:28:47 Zac: Each?

0:28:47 Siobhan: Each.

0:28:48 Brennan: To each of them. Hold on one second, I'm gonna roll their save.

0:28:51 Murph: Oh, wow.

0:28:52 Zac: Oh, wow, yeah.

0:28:54 Murph: Ew.

0:28:54 Ally: Thanks, friends.

0:28:55 Siobhan: You're very welcome.

0:28:56 Emily: Those guys are fuckin' going up in flames.

0:28:57 Brennan: 25, Jesus.

0:28:59 Emily: Fuckin' eat sulfur, bitches.

0:29:03 Siobhan: Eat my grits.

0:29:04 Brennan: So you see that they're talking to each other.

0:29:06 Sofia: So we can go through the fire, right?

0:29:07 Brennan: So you see that they're near the cocooned deli guy, who's like-- [muffled screaming]

0:29:12 Brennan: And you see that one of the bugsters who has like, a handlebar mustache, some big antennas, holding a big coffee cup, and he's like,

0:29:17 Bugster: Really, what I think would be cool would be to put a cafe in here, but more like a WeWork space. Oh, hey, Pete, how's it goin', bud? [fire exploding] [screaming] [fire crackling]

0:29:28 Brennan: You see that the deli owner screams, he goes,

0:29:28 Deli Owner: Ah!

0:29:33 Brennan: And you burn the webs on him, but he's totally unharmed, so he's like— The deli owner screams manically, but starts to decrease in volume as he realizes he’s not hurt, crying instead.

0:29:44 Emily: That's so cool to have been in fire but not be hurt.

0:29:47 Ally: Yeah.

0:29:48 Emily: You gave him a great story.

0:29:49 Zac: The unburnt. Deli owner.

0:29:49 Ally: Fuck yeah.

0:29:52 Brennan: You see he looks around at his now burning bodega and he goes,

0:29:54 Deli Owner: [screaming, slight accent] Ah, okay, maybe the insurance will cover some of this damage.

0:30:00 Brennan: The two bugsters turn to you and go— [chittering]

0:30:03 Brennan: Smoking but not dead, and say—

0:30:06 Ally: Fuck. 25?

0:30:07 Bugsters: Ugh, wow, okay. I feel a lot of aggression and I guess we're gonna have to deal with this.

0:30:14 Brennan: That is Pete.

0:30:15 Ally: There's this little swarm of bugs on the ground, and then there's a roach.

0:30:20 Brennan: Oh, the swarm is fucking gone. You guys wanna hand--

0:30:22 Ally: And the roach is gone too?

0:30:24 Brennan: The roach is also fully gone.

0:30:25 Ally: Fuck yeah.

0:30:26 Brennan: So the little roach, fully gone. The little swarm, fully gone.

0:30:29 Murph: Ew.

0:30:30 Ally: Cool, fuck.

0:30:32 Siobhan: It was a cool spell.

0:30:33 Zac: That was...

0:30:33 Murph: That was great.

0:30:34 Zac: Rad. [dramatic music]

0:30:35 Brennan: I actually am going to, just 'cause of where this is at, and here we go. We got one, this person's gonna rush through here. And where's the other one?

0:30:46 Siobhan: Yeah, you got it.

0:30:47 Brennan: This bugster jumps up onto the rack above.

0:30:49 Ally: Gross.

0:30:51 Brennan: Above Pete up here, and they're gonna take some swings, baby. Um, ba-ba-bum. Uh, okay. Ooh, Pete, you lucky boy. [health bare whirring]

0:31:24 Brennan: Pete, you take 14 points of damage. These bugsters start going-- [growling] You know, with these huge like, sort of praying mantis mandibles overhead, and then you see they go like,

0:31:35 Bugsters: I don't get what your deal is, man. We're just trying to create a fun community space here in the bodega.

0:31:41 Ally: Fuck.

0:31:42 Brennan: That's their turn. That's now going to be Misty.

0:31:48 Siobhan: Well, I'm gonna get in there. Get in the mix, why not?

0:31:51 Brennan: Hell yeah. Ally sighs, and looks up at Brennan, about to say something.

0:31:56 Brennan: And I'm gonna need your Wild Magic roll as well, yep.

0:31:58 Siobhan: Oh no, it's one, two, three, four? Ally rolls, then looks up, silently.

0:32:00 Murph: That's a four. [tense music]

0:32:02 Brennan: Wild Magic Surge, hurray!

0:32:02 Ally: Oh, fuck.

0:32:05 Brennan: Hold on.

0:32:09 Lou: I'm much too close to Pete.

0:32:11 Ally: Oh, fuck.

0:32:13 Brennan: You see that you start floating. [whooshing] You are just floating up. You have become perfectly weightless.

0:32:20 Ally: That's fine, that's fine. No one died.

0:32:23 Brennan: No one died. Yeah, you begin to float above the ground, up near the top of the bodega. So you're just like, hovering above the hole now. You are totally weightless, like swimming. Like, the dream realm has fully merged with this section of New York.

0:32:40 Ally: Cool, does Wild Magic Surge restart now that I've hit it?

0:32:42 Brennan: Now it resets back to one.

0:32:43 Ally: Okay, thank God.

0:32:44 Brennan: Um, dope. [whistling]

0:32:48 Ally: Sorry, guys.

0:32:49 Brennan: Yes, now that's going to be Misty.

0:32:52 Siobhan: Okay, I'm gonna get in here and then I'm gonna cast, oops, sorry. So these guys don't look particularly fucked up.

0:33:03 Brennan: Actually, the two bugsters look pretty fucked up. They are badly burnt.

0:33:06 Siobhan: All right, well, regardless of that, I'm gonna cast Crown of Madness on this little. I'll cast Crown of Madness on this dude up here.

0:33:17 Brennan: Rad, awesome, let me know what save that is.

0:33:22 Siobhan: It is a Wisdom saving throw.

0:33:25 Brennan: Okay, rad. You cast it. You see that the bugster goes— [growling] [magical shimmering]

0:33:33 Brennan: And chitters madly and resists the spell.

0:33:36 Siobhan: Dang.

0:33:37 Brennan: He goes, he says,

0:33:37 Bugster: Um, okay. Listen, I don't know why you have to come into a fun community space and try to harsh everyone's buzz.

0:33:46 Zac: Ooh.

0:33:51 Brennan: So, Misty moves, that's your action. Now, that's gonna be Ricky.

0:33:56 Zac: Okay, I am… I wanna look at that like, vent on the ceiling and see if I can break it open and jump down into it.

0:34:06 Brennan: Rad.

0:34:07 Zac: That one right there next to--

0:34:08 Brennan: Um, yes, you can either try to make an attack to like, hack through it, or you can make an Athletics check to try to bust through it.

0:34:17 Zac: I guess I'll attack it, just because I have two attacks, right? Does that make sense?

0:34:24 Brennan: Hell yeah.

0:34:24 Ally: Cool.

0:34:24 Zac: All right, so I'll just--

0:34:25 Ally: Oh yeah, you have that axe or whatever.

0:34:27 Zac: Yeah.

0:34:27 Ally: Yeah, cool.

0:34:29 Zac: Oof, a 2 and a 1.

0:34:29 Ally: You're blessed.

0:34:33 Lou: You're blessed.

0:34:33 Emily: You're blessed.

0:34:34 Murph: A 2 and a 1.

0:34:34 Zac: And then I add what?

0:34:35 Emily: So add the d4.

0:34:36 Lou: D4, Bless.

0:34:36 Emily: D4.

0:34:40 Zac: So 4 to the 2. I mean, okay, so it's an eight.

0:34:45 Brennan: The AC you're trying to hit is 16 for this metal panel.

0:34:48 Emily: Plus 4 plus 2 now.

0:34:50 Zac: I don't think I—

0:34:51 Siobhan: You wanna use a Luck point?

0:34:52 Zac: Oh yeah, can I use a Luck?

0:34:53 Brennan: Yeah, you can use a Luck to reroll this. But wait, do you have Sacred Weapon active right now as well?

0:34:58 Zac: Yes.

0:34:58 Brennan: Cool.

0:34:58 Zac: So that would be plus one, so that would still be 15.

0:35:01 Brennan: 15, cool, so you can use a Lucky point now if you want.

0:35:03 Zac: All right. Okay, that one hit.

0:35:05 Emily: Oh, okay, hah.

0:35:07 Brennan: This thing has 12 hit points. You gotta do 12 damage on this attack roll.

0:35:11 Zac: 1d8 plus 7.

0:35:11 Murph: Do it.

0:35:13 Lou: Let's go, Ricky, come on.

0:35:15 Siobhan: Yeah, come on, Ricky.

0:35:15 Zac: Which one's my d8?

0:35:16 Sofia: Come on, Mr. March.

0:35:18 Zac: Yeah, I hit it for 14.

0:35:18 Emily: Yeah.

0:35:22 Brennan: For 14, hell yeah. So yeah, Ricky runs over, what does he do?

0:35:27 Zac: I would love to break it open, just like a slash. Like, I've seen one of these, and slash it open, grab Kugrash, and jump down.

0:35:36 Ally: Aw, cute.

0:35:36 Murph: Oh, nice.

0:35:37 Emily: So cute!

0:35:38 Brennan: Hell yeah. So, it's like this—

0:35:39 Ally: Oh, isn't this sweet?

0:35:40 Emily: I hope that Kugrash kinda squirms and doesn't want to come.

0:35:44 Brennan: So, our boy--

0:35:44 Zac: I smell smoke and then--

0:35:47 Brennan: Our boy, yeah, you smell smoke, fire! Our boy, the firefighter paladin of New York, gleams with civic light and raises the axe aloft. [grunts] Hack the vent open, grab Kugrash, as this beetle is like-- [crashing] And just as it's about to like, weigh down on you, you-- [grunting]

0:36:07 Ally: Oh, wait!

0:36:07 Brennan: Yes?

0:36:08 Ally: I can communicate a Mindlink with someone if they're willing. Do you think he would be willing?

0:36:14 Brennan: Probably, yeah.

0:36:15 Ally: Before he jumps down, can I remind him that I didn't save Kugrash from the fire that's below you? I only saved you. I had to sub out Kugrash.

0:36:22 Zac: I mean, is it like fully burning?

0:36:23 Brennan: It's not gonna be as bad as the damage from the spell. It'll be a smaller amount of fire damage from the ambient burning.

0:36:27 Ally: Can Kugrash take that?

0:36:29 Zac: I can heal.

0:36:29 Siobhan: Throw him.

0:36:29 Ally: We're having this convo.

0:36:30 Siobhan: Jump down there and then throw him.

0:36:31 Zac: I could just Cure Wounds on Kugrash.

0:36:32 Brennan: You, boom! You and Kugrash are off the roof.

0:36:35 Emily: Can you throw Kugrash mid-air?

0:36:38 Brennan: If you guys want to go ahead and land, give me just an Athletics check real quick to land safely with Kugrash.

0:36:45 Zac: Uh, 19.

0:36:45 Brennan: Hell yeah.

0:36:46 Ally: Okay, cool, cool, cool.

0:36:46 Brennan: You are solid gold. Incredible feat of superheroics from Ricky Matsui. Rad as hell. That's now going to be--

0:36:56 Zac: And is it dark in there? 'Cause when I use Sacred Weapon, I think my axe shines or whatever.

0:37:02 Brennan: It is dark no longer. [holy shimmering]

0:37:06 Brennan: The bodega is illuminated by your glowing axe. You hear above you, boom, boom, boom! You see that the beetle is trying to jam its body [metal creaking] through the opening of the vent.

0:37:12 Zac: Do your thing.

0:37:18 Brennan: I'm gonna roll to see--

0:37:19 Murph: Can the rats get opportunity attacks? There's four swarms of rats.

0:37:22 Brennan: Ooh, that's right. Yes, they absolutely can get opportunity attacks.

0:37:24 Ally: Here we go, Siobhan.

0:37:24 Emily: Oh yeah, oh yeah.

0:37:26 Murph: Oh, yes, please roll, yes. One more d20.

0:37:27 Emily: Designated.

0:37:28 Murph: One more d20, here we go.

0:37:29 Lou: Four nat 20s.

0:37:32 Siobhan: Jesus Christ, just my dice hit. I got an 11, the rest of them are 6, 5, and 4.

0:37:37 Murph: So 13, Jesus.

0:37:38 Brennan: So 13, 13 hits, roll damage.

0:37:40 Murph: Oh, good.

0:37:42 Siobhan: Maybe it's your dice.

0:37:44 Emily: Maybe your dice are cursed. We need to do a moon ritual and bath them in salt.

0:37:50 Murph: Uh, 5 damage?

0:37:52 Zac: Can we pause for a moon ritual?

0:37:55 Brennan: Hell yeah.

0:37:55 Emily: We need a quick salt bath for the dice.

0:37:58 Ally: Are you blessed?

0:37:59 Murph: Not the rats.

0:38:01 Lou: I didn't bless those damn rats.

0:38:03 Emily: Yeah, what if you had done that?

0:38:04 Ally: Come on, Kingston, use a higher level spell slot.

0:38:06 Emily: Use a third-level spell slot so you can—

0:38:07 Brennan: The beetle is going to attempt to ram through and get to the bodega, unsuccessfully.

0:38:14 Ally: Okay. [crashing]

0:38:16 Beetle: Guys, you can't be in the bodega right now! It's under renovation. I'm gonna eat ya.

0:38:23 Brennan: You see, that's going to be Kugrash.

0:38:26 Murph: Sweet.

0:38:27 Zac: Oh, for a bonus action, can I cast Shield of Faith on Kugrash? [holy shimmering]

0:38:32 Murph: Oh, thanks, man.

0:38:33 Brennan: Oh, hell yeah.

0:38:34 Murph: Plus two.

0:38:34 Zac: Plus two AC.

0:38:35 Murph: Okay, I'm at 19, all right.

0:38:36 Brennan: Kugrash, give me a Dexterity saving throw, by the way.

0:38:38 Murph: Oh, boy.

0:38:39 Emily: Can we say that that manifests as Kugrash's hair is like, really static-electric?

0:38:43 Brennan: You take 6 points of fire damage. [health bar whirring]

0:38:45 Murph: Good.

0:38:46 Zac: You good?

0:38:47 Lou: Thank you.

0:38:48 Brennan: Cool, that's going to be, yeah, Kugrash, that's your turn.

0:38:52 Murph: Sweet. I guess I'm gonna see, oh, it's probably such a, okay. So we got two guys back here. I should probably fight them as opposed to...

0:39:02 Ally: We wanna find out what that--

0:39:03 Emily: I'm going after that.

0:39:05 Siobhan: Yeah, maybe there's another hole.

0:39:06 Murph: There's another hole right here, too.

0:39:06 Ally: We need you to fight.

0:39:08 Emily: Yeah, there's a hole through there.

0:39:09 Murph: All right, I'm gonna peek in the hole. I'm only like, five feet away from this hole.

0:39:13 Ally: No, remember, she got 20 damage when she was close to the hole.

0:39:15 Emily: Yah.

0:39:17 Ally: Just like, immediately.

0:39:18 Siobhan: And that was half damage.

0:39:19 Emily: That was half damage.

0:39:19 Murph: Okay, in that case, I'm gonna create a Flaming Sphere and send it through the hole. [clapping]

0:39:24 Siobhan: Sick.

0:39:24 Brennan: Hell yeah! How about it?

0:39:27 Ricky: Just be careful.

0:39:29 Kugrash: Ah, it's fine.

0:39:31 Emily: Ricky's gonna supervise.

0:39:32 Brennan: You, boom, create a Flaming Sphere.

0:39:33 Siobhan: Cool!

0:39:34 Brennan: And send it through the hole.

0:39:35 Murph: This, I'm on this side, so this hole.

0:39:36 Ally: It's a Himalayan salt lamp.

0:39:37 Brennan: Cool, that hole right there?

0:39:38 Murph: Yeah. [flames crackling]

0:39:39 Brennan: You hear some screaming and chittering through there. Let me take a little peak real quick. [whistling]

0:39:45 Brennan: Yeah, actually, go ahead and roll damage.

0:39:47 Murph: Sweet.

0:39:49 Brennan: Or, does it happen on their turn?

0:39:51 Murph: It happens if it bumps into one person. They take the damage, and at the end of their turn, if they're in the space, they take damage.

0:39:58 Brennan: Cool, go ahead and roll damage.

0:40:01 Ally: Yeah, nice, you can do it.

0:40:03 Murph: 5.

0:40:05 Brennan: Yeah, you hear a screaming, chittering little thing.

0:40:07 Murph: Sweet, all right, they make a Dexterity saving throw.

0:40:10 Ally: I haven't given this [the plastic Fireball range indicator] back yet because it's so bad-ass.

0:40:13 Emily: It is.

0:40:13 Zac: Can you? [pretends to raise it to his face]

0:40:14 Emily: Yeah, I was gonna say, keep it over your face.

0:40:15 Brennan: Hell yeah, Kugrash, that's great.

0:40:16 Emily: That's like your saint picture.

0:40:16 Ally: Yeah. [puts the sphere behind their head like a halo]

0:40:17 Brennan: Are you doing anything else or no?

0:40:18 Murph: Uh, ba-ba-ba, nope, that's action and bonus action.

0:40:24 Zac: It looked like a stained glass window.

0:40:25 Ally: Yeah.

0:40:27 Emily: Wow, I would definitely pray to that window.

0:40:31 Brennan: There's no roaches out over here, are there?

0:40:33 Siobhan: No. [insects buzzing]

0:40:35 Siobhan: I killed them all.

0:40:35 Brennan: These two guys drop down here through the vent and are going to attack Ricky.

0:40:41 Zac: Bring it on.

0:40:45 Brennan: Both miss.

0:40:46 Emily: Cowards, fools.

0:40:49 Brennan: That's gonna be Sofia.

0:40:51 Emily: Okay, first off, I'm gonna go through this, but I'm gonna roll a Dexterity saving throw because I'm an Acrobat, so, if I just get a DC 15, which I did, I won't have to, it's not difficult terrain.

0:41:04 Brennan: Cool, awesome.

0:41:05 Emily: So what I wanna do is I wanna jump through these shelves. I wanna kick through the shelves, like swing on the top of the shelf and put my little body through to get to this thing.

0:41:16 Brennan: Awesome, I will let you consider the shelves as much as being a wall, which is sort of what they are. If you want to consider them difficult terrain, you gotta give me a DC 20 acrobatics check

0:41:25 Emily: DC 20 Acrobatics, okay. I'm blessed too, right?

0:41:28 Brennan: You are blessed.

0:41:29 Emily: Ooh, I want this bad.

0:41:32 Zac: Yeah.

0:41:32 Emily: Okay, 15, I got it! [dramatic music]

0:41:34 Murph: Yeah!

0:41:35 Brennan: You guys see, yeah, you fuckin' parkour. You slide through the webs, and you go through the swinging pincers of that mantis, boom, land on the other side of the shelves, with some--

0:41:46 Emily: And then, can I, oh, sorry, what was that?

0:41:47 Brennan: Yeah, with some movement to spare, so you get--

0:41:49 Emily: Yeah, I still got an action and stuff. I want to do a quick Perception check on this thing. Does it seem like a cocoon that's gonna like, hatch a swarm of bugs?

0:41:59 Brennan: You listen. Give me a Perception or an Insight, either one.

0:42:03 Emily: Perception.

0:42:03 Zac: Can you do it blessed?

0:42:04 Emily: That's gonna be 25. I can make it more if you need. I haven't even blessed myself yet.

0:42:10 Lou: Brennan, just ask, just ask.

0:42:11 Murph: Brennan, just ask.

0:42:13 Brennan: You listen to the cocoon as you land, phew, and you hear-- [purring]

0:42:19 Emily: You motherfuckers, I fuckin' go to town on that thing, both attacks.

0:42:24 Siobhan: No, that's a cat!

0:42:25 Brennan: No, no, the cocoon!

0:42:26 Emily: Wait.

0:42:26 Siobhan: Oh.

0:42:27 Emily: Oh, wait, can I attack it in a way that--

0:42:29 Brennan: You can try to rip.

0:42:30 Emily: Can I rip the cocoon off?

0:42:31 Brennan: Yes, you absolutely can.

0:42:32 Emily: Okay, so—

0:42:33 Ally: It sounded like bugs.

0:42:34 Emily: Yeah, I guess I thought, oh my God.

0:42:36 Brennan: No, you hear a soft breathing of some kind.

0:42:37 Emily: Oh my God, ha! Okay, wait, I already did it. I had gotten two 9, so do 17, or what am I rolling here? Am I attacking to rip it off? I'm so nervous right now.

0:42:48 Brennan: I'm sorry, you are attacking to rip, I assume you're attacking to rip the cocoon off.

0:42:51 Emily: Yeah, okay.

0:42:52 Brennan: Go for it, yeah.

0:42:53 Emily: So I had gotten, I got a 9 plus 8 plus 2, so 20. I did that wrong, but, and then--

0:43:02 Ally: 19.

0:43:02 Emily: And then a 22.

0:43:05 Brennan: Those both hit, yeah.

0:43:07 Emily: Okay, and then I'm doing damage to the cocoon?

0:43:09 Brennan: Yeah, you're trying to deal--

0:43:10 Emily: To make it clear, I'm not hurting the cat.

0:43:12 Ally: Are you hurting the cat?

0:43:13 Brennan: No. You're trying to deal 15 points of damage.

0:43:14 Lou: It sounds like she's hurting the cat.

0:43:16 Emily: Oh, well, that's...

0:43:16 Zac: Emily just hates that cat.

0:43:18 Emily: Okay, so that's gonna be 9 and then 6.

0:43:23 Zac: That's 15.

0:43:24 Emily: Oh, okay.

0:43:25 Brennan: Oh, you did it. So you see that you, hah, land over the thing, hear this purring, and I think, once again, probably go for the hairdresser two holes.

0:43:33 Emily: Yeah, I definitely do.

0:43:35 Brennan: Snip, snip, snip, snip, snip. [whooshing] [shimmering]

0:43:39 Brennan: Light disappears, the fire goes out. [whooshing]

0:43:44 Brennan: The axe glows brighter. [mystical music]

0:43:48 Brennan: Stars appear all over the bodega. [whooshing]

0:43:52 Brennan: For a moment, space and time are suspended. [gasping]

0:44:00 Brennan: You see endless stars swirling in a cosmic bodega. All of the snacks and cakes and boxes of cereals and ramens and ice creams are suddenly replaced on the shelves with glittering treasures. Swords, shining helms, coins, far-off potions and tinctures. This bodega is a bodega of wonders.

0:44:23 Sofia: I think I cast a spell, guys!

0:44:26 Misty: I don't think it was you!

0:44:28 Brennan: Appearing before you, with one green eye and one blue, is the most beautiful brindled cat. [Emily screaming]

0:44:36 Brennan: Its smile Cheshire Cats out, and you see, it goes-- [deep purring]

0:44:45 La Gran Gata: [very deep voice] Sofia. Yo soy La Gran Gata de la tienda esquina.

0:44:53 Sofia: Me gusta mucho.

0:44:57 La Gran Gata: Te amo.

0:44:59 Sofia: Quiero, queiro..

0:45:01 Ally: Are you gonna fuck that cat?

0:45:05 Siobhan: Look, she's going through her period.

0:45:06 Ally: All right, all right.

0:45:07 Sofia: Amigo, amigos.

0:45:09 Brennan: He says,

0:45:09 La Gran Gata: [Spanish accent] My daughter, mija. It is a very good try, I appreciate. You have released me from my prison. Your friends… [excited] oh, a rat.

0:45:25 Kugrash: No.

0:45:28 Brennan: He goes,

0:45:28 La Gran Gata: You have done a great service, and I shall see it repaid. I guard these stores with might and magic. Let us see you repaid for this service you have done me. [whooshing] [meowing]

0:45:49 La Gran Gata: Also, if you want to help yourself to some Ben & Jerry's, it's in the back.

0:45:52 Sofia: I will take that, and I have one tiny request, and I am so sorry if it disrespectful. Can I please pet you?

0:45:58 La Gran Gata: You will do this?

0:46:00 Sofia: Yeah, behind the ears, anywhere you like it. Chinny rubs, I give him chinny rubs. [purring and moaning]

0:46:05 La Gran Gata: These are the finest chinny rubs ever I have felt.

0:46:10 Sofia: Thank you.

0:46:11 La Gran Gata: You...

0:46:12 Sofia: I was thinking of becoming a masseuse at one point.

0:46:14 Ally: She's good.

0:46:15 La Gran Gata: Do you know this? I know you are new to this Unsleeping City. Great deeds are being done. You, as well, have a role to play in deeds to come. [whooshing] [gasping]

0:46:31 Brennan: The cat, boom, vanishes. Your movement increases by an additional 10 for the rest of the fight. And you see that this cat becomes a whirling torrent of stars, and says, [wind chimes shimmering]

0:46:46 La Gran Gata: I will need these vermin to vacate my bodega at once.

0:46:52 Brennan: And she, phew, turns into stars and begins to befuddle as a, like, swirling thing of stars. Both of the bugsters still in the bodega. [whooshing]

0:47:02 Zac: What about those roaches?

0:47:04 Brennan: Oh, the roaches as well.

0:47:05 Zac: Oh, okay.

0:47:06 Brennan: You guys within the bodega see that all of these insects are being bamboozled by La Gran Gata.

0:47:14 Emily: Oh my God.

0:47:16 Sofia: Guys, I think I might be magic after all.

0:47:20 Brennan: Hell yes, Sofia.

0:47:22 Misty: Keep trying, Sofia.

0:47:24 Brennan: That's gonna be your guy's rat swarms, up on the roof.

0:47:26 Murph: Sweet, I want them to keep attacking these stupid big bugs. I'm gonna hit this time.

0:47:36 Siobhan and Murph: Yes!

0:47:36 Ally: Yeah!

0:47:37 Murph: 15 and 21 for two of 'em. Uh, and 20 for another one.

0:47:43 Brennan: Hell yeah, those are hits.

0:47:44 Murph: The other guys are all misses, sweet. They actually, okay 14 damage.

0:47:59 Brennan: Hell yes.

0:48:01 Ally: Great.

0:48:02 Brennan: You hear that beetle being like,

0:48:04 Beetle: All right, guys, we gotta knock it off.

0:48:06 Rats: To arms, to arms, my brothers! Let them sing of this day for ages to come! The day where we banded together, rats and rats alike!

0:48:17 Kugrash: Yeah, that's right, kill the bug!

0:48:25 Brennan: I'm going to need everybody here, uh, is Ricky and Kugrash there? So this is gonna hit Ricky, Kugrash, and Pete, but not Sofia or Misty. I'm gonna need you guys all to make Constitution saving throws.

0:48:40 Ally: Is that blessed also?

0:48:41 Lou: Oh, yes.

0:48:41 Murph: Oh, yes, thank goodness.

0:48:43 Lou: All of you stay blessed, stay blessed.

0:48:49 Ally: 17.

0:48:49 Murph: Yes, fuckin' 24.

0:48:52 Zac: 17 as well.

0:48:55 Brennan: Cool, what'd you get?

0:48:56 Lou: Oh, am I in it?

0:48:57 Ally: No, no, no, he's further.

0:48:58 Brennan: Just you three. Okay, you guys all make it. All of you guys take 8 points of damage as you hear Becky go,

0:49:04 Becky: Um, guys, could somebody go talk to them?

0:49:09 Brennan: [buzzing] And the bodega fills with just tons of swarming regular-sized locusts and biting, stinging things. [health bars noise] You guys are just surrounded by these biting, stinging insects.

0:49:21 Ally: Fuck.

0:49:22 Brennan: That, there's just like plague of swarming things here.

0:49:25 Zac: How much damage was that again, sorry?

0:49:26 Brennan: 8.

0:49:28 Ally: I'm down to 13.

0:49:29 Brennan: That's going to be Kingston, that's you.

0:49:32 Lou: I can't touch Pete, right? 'Cause he's all the way up there?

0:49:36 Siobhan: And you'd have to go into the swarm.

0:49:37 Brennan: No, actually, you could probably reach in and grab Pete's foot.

0:49:39 Lou: Okay.

0:49:39 Siobhan: All right, is the swarm still there or is it gone?

0:49:41 Brennan: Swarm is still there.

0:49:42 Lou: So would I have to enter the swarm?

0:49:44 Brennan: You would probably have to enter the swarm.

0:49:46 Lou: Great, that's great.

0:49:46 Ally: Ah, it's okay, it's okay.

0:49:47 Lou: I'll get you in a second. Can I Command the, is that bug, like, sticking its head through the vent, trying to get down still?

0:49:57 Brennan: It's up there, you can see it, yeah.

0:49:58 Lou: Can I Command it?

0:49:59 Brennan: Sure.

0:50:00 Lou: Yeah, I'd like to Command it to,

0:50:00 Kingston: Halt and stay up there, you damn bug.

0:50:07 Brennan: Awesome. It's gonna make a save. You see that it looks at you and goes,

0:50:12 Bug: Huh?

0:50:14 Kingston: Stay up there, you damn bug, stay.

0:50:16 Bug: Are you from like, a zoning board or a neighborhood council?

0:50:19 Kingston: One or the other, yes!

0:50:22 Bug: All right, guys, we're gonna have to do some paperwork. We gotta, let's wrap it up, huh! We gotta kill these guys later.

0:50:28 Brennan: You see it turns around and sort of stomps away from the vent. Cool, so you cast Command, but you do enter the space, so I'm gonna need that Constitution saving throw.

0:50:38 Lou: Okay. Uh, 19.

0:50:41 Ally: Nice.

0:50:43 Brennan: Cool, you take 15, 9, you take 12 points of damage. [health bar whirring]

0:50:48 Lou: Great.

0:50:49 Ally: Fuck.

0:50:50 Brennan: Uh, ba-ba-bum, cool. So that's your action, that's your, go ahead and move your character wherever your character is.

0:51:00 Lou: Okay, I had a question about moving. Could I attempt to do an old man version of what Sofie Bikes did and like, scramble through the aisle thing?

0:51:10 Ally: The bottom one?

0:51:11 Emily: Like maybe the section where I kicked through?

0:51:13 Lou: Yeah, I'd take the safe DC.

0:51:16 Brennan: Cool, it's a DC 20 Acrobatics, right?

0:51:18 Lou: Okay, great.

0:51:20 Brennan: Yeah, give me a DC 20 Acrobatics check.

0:51:20 Murph: Oh, Kingston.

0:51:21 Ally: What do you have on Acrobatics?

0:51:22 Emily: You have plus 1.

0:51:23 Lou: I have plus 1.

0:51:24 Murph: You have to roll a 19.

0:51:27 Lou: Nat 20. Brennan stares at him, jaw dropped. [group cheering]

0:51:31 Lou: [standing up out of his seat] Come on!

0:51:35 Ally: Oh my god.

0:51:36 Lou: I could feel, I truly, I have never been more confident rolling a dice in my entire life.

0:51:43 Emily: It was in your fingers. You just needed to get it out.

0:51:44 Lou: Yeah. [dramatic music]

0:51:45 Brennan: You walk into this bodega and the swirling stars around here. You see that it materializes in the stars. You see the face of La Gran Gata appear for a moment, and you see that the cat looks at you. The bodega cat of all bodega cats. He goes,

0:52:06 La Gran Gata: Kingston Brown, from Uptown.

0:52:10 Kingston: Oh, La Gran Gata, oh, nice to meet you. I've heard a lot about you.

0:52:15 Brennan: You see that as you move, the cat, this beautiful ancient cat spirit, bows and you see echoes of like, cultures across time, Ancient Egypt, all the places that cats have been worshiped and the shelves, you don't have to jump at all. The shelves, boom, slide, and you walk calmly through the open place. You can go wherever you want in that bodega.

0:52:38 Lou: Okay, great, I'll just go stand next to Sofie Bikes.

0:52:42 Brennan: Incredible.

0:52:44 Lou: Gosh. Wild.

0:52:49 Brennan: Rock and roll. That's fucking wild. Pete, that's you.

0:52:55 Ally: I'm still floating, right?

0:52:59 Brennan: Yes.

0:53:00 Ally: Cool, so that does mean I can just more easily float towards the next webbed hole?

0:53:05 Brennan: Yeah, absolutely.

0:53:06 Ally: Cool, cool, I go there.

0:53:08 Lou: Just leaving these dudes.

0:53:08 Ally: Yeah.

0:53:10 Siobhan: You can just fuckin' leave 'em.

0:53:14 Ally: Because they're pre-occupied, right? With like, the stars or whatever? I don't have to like, take a disengage?

0:53:19 Brennan: Yeah, well, they might get an attack on you. You're not sure, but yes.

0:53:27 Zac: You have 13 health, is that what you said?

0:53:29 Ally: Yeah.

0:53:30 Siobhan: I have, if you… I mean, you can get to him or get to me. We both have Cure Wounds.

0:53:33 Lou: If you can get to me, yeah.

0:53:37 Ally: Hm, it just feels like we have so much more to go through.

0:53:40 Siobhan: I know.

0:53:41 Ally: It's like we gotta, um, I do have a shield if someone attacks me, so I guess that's like...

0:53:48 Brennan: Do whatever you wanna do.

0:53:49 Murph: You could disengage and just poke your head.

0:53:50 Ally: Yeah, I wanna cast something into there.

0:53:52 Murph: Yeah, that's true.

0:53:54 Zac: Just knowing what's in there will be really helpful, if you can get--

0:53:58 Ally: Okay, yeah, whatever, I'll just go. I'll take the attack of opportunity.

0:54:01 Brennan: Okay, you see that they are swinging with what appears to be like disadvantage because of this crazy cat magic.

0:54:07 Ally: Cool, cool, cool.

0:54:08 Brennan: That was a clutch move, Sofia.

0:54:09 Ally: Yeah!

0:54:11 Emily: I thought maybe I would get a familiar out of it, but that's fine.

0:54:16 Ally: You don't know yet.

0:54:17 Lou: You just find a cat.

0:54:18 Murph: Always needs a familiar.

0:54:20 Brennan: Hell yeah, first one misses with the reaction, second one misses with reaction.

0:54:25 Ally: Yes, all right, cool.

0:54:25 Emily: Whoo!

0:54:26 Ally: I poke my head in there and I cast Fear.

0:54:30 Brennan: Ooh, fuck! [tense music]

0:54:34 Brennan: Let's see here, whoosh.

0:54:35 Murph: And my fireball is here, right, on this bug?

0:54:38 Siobhan: Oh yeah, the fireball.

0:54:39 Brennan: Yes, exactly. Also who's here is Becky.

0:54:43 Siobhan: Becky with the bad bug.

0:54:45 Brennan: She's like over this person on top of the laundromat stuff. So you go into this next hole into the laundromat. Let me see here, so you're here, so it's five, ten, fifteen, twenty, twenty-five, thirty. You're gonna have to take a double move to kinda get in there.

0:54:59 Ally: And I won't be able to cast Fear?

0:55:01 Brennan: Or you can just cast Fear through the hole here.

0:55:04 Ally: Yeah, yeah, I would love to do that, like a cone facing that way, because this guy has the fireball.

0:55:09 Brennan: Yeah, he's got the Flaming Sphere there. Cool, they are going to roll their save for Fear. Fear is a cone, I believe, right?

0:55:18 Ally: Yeah, a 30-foot cone.

0:55:20 Brennan: 30-foot cone, cool. You could even, if you want to try to hit Becky, you can maybe like, poke your head in the hole and try to hit them both.

0:55:25 Ally: Yeah, that's what I'm trying, yeah. I'll try to hit Becky and, uh...

0:55:29 Murph: Whatever else.

0:55:30 Brennan: I think this is the cone here, right?

0:55:31 Ally: Whatever else is there, yeah.

0:55:32 Brennan: Yes, you can hit 'em all, yep, cool.

0:55:33 Ally: Cool, all three of those people?

0:55:35 Brennan: Yes, absolutely. We'll roll for the roach and the swarm. What's the DC on that?

0:55:41 Ally: Your DC is 16.

0:55:43 Brennan: Cool. Oh man, Becky does not flinch. The roach, however, goes-- [chittering] [screaming] Uh, what does Pete look like as he summons the power of pure nightmare?

0:55:58 Ally: Ooh, um… I look like a Defend… Defend, where are we?

0:56:10 Brennan: You're in Astoria, yeah.

0:56:10 Ally: Queens?

0:56:11 Ally: Yeah, Defend Astoria, you know? I've made like a Facebook post of places not to give money to, and it's all the places that they're planning on building, like their WeWorks and shit.

0:56:22 Brennan: You guys see Pete like, [ominous music] floating there as his eyes sink into his head. Shadows wrap around him and this Facebook post, boom, comes out of his chest.

0:56:30 Ally: And it's just racking up likes by like, locals. [ticking]

0:56:34 Brennan: You see that the roach in front of you goes,

0:56:37 Roach: Ah! Socialist community organizing, run!

0:56:43 Brennan: Turns and just, this and the swarm fucking scatters, gone.

0:56:46 Ally: Cool.

0:56:48 Brennan: That's Pete, it's gonna be these bugsters, baby. Misty, you're right over here, right?

0:56:52 Siobhan: Yeah.

0:56:53 Brennan: Cool, this bug's just coming down for Sofia.

0:56:55 Emily: Come at me.

0:56:56 Zac: That's Winston.

0:56:57 Emily: Kingston.

0:56:57 Zac: Kingston, sorry.

0:56:59 Brennan: Cool, okay, so one's gonna come for Kingston, one's coming for Misty.

0:57:03 Siobhan: Bring it on!

0:57:06 Brennan: 17 and 4. Misty, you take, uh, 5 damage from one of the bugsters' claws. [health bar whirring]

0:57:14 Siobhan: That's not too bad.

0:57:16 Brennan: And Kingston… Ooh, Kingston, you take, ba-ba-bum… 1, 2, 3, 7, 9, 12. You take 14 damage [health bar whirring] from one of them slashing across you with a claw.

0:57:38 Lou: Great, 21.

0:57:45 Brennan: Hell yes, that's now going to be Misty, that's you.

0:57:51 Siobhan: Hm.

0:57:52 Brennan: I'm sorry, at the end of your turn, Pete, you're actually gonna, you're still in that swarm of insects. I need another Constitution throw from you.

0:58:01 Emily: Blessed.

0:58:02 Ally: Yeah, thank you.

0:58:04 Brennan: Hell yeah.

0:58:04 Ally: 22.

0:58:06 Brennan: Okay, you still take half damage, which is gonna be, you take 8 points of damage. [health bar whirring]

0:58:13 Ally: Jesus, fuck. I'm down to 5.

0:58:15 Brennan: Give me a Wild Magic check, too.

0:58:18 Ally: 15.

0:58:19 Brennan: Cool, Misty, that's you.

0:58:23 Siobhan: I am going to cast… Is the shelf still moved from when the bodega cat moved it?

0:58:31 Brennan: I'm gonna say, on a nat 20, yes, it is.

0:58:33 Siobhan: Great. So I'm gonna cast, hm… I'm just gonna cast Thunderwave on this guy in front of me, so it's a Constitution saving throw.

0:58:48 Brennan: Hell yeah.

0:58:52 Siobhan: And it's 2d8 damage.

0:58:54 Brennan: Go ahead and roll it.

0:58:57 Siobhan: Which is 11.

0:58:59 Brennan: You look at this guy. What does Misty say as she casts the spell, what happens?

0:59:04 Siobhan: I'm gonna say,

0:59:04 Misty: I heard you people have been complaining about loud noises at night. Well, listen to this, boom!

0:59:10 Brennan: Boom! [explosion banging] Misty's lightning doesn't crackle asymmetrically. It's like a perfect showbiz circle of lightning bolts, and this guy is fucking rent asunder and he goes, [screaming] You see this hipster lady in front of you instead goes like,

0:59:27 Hipster Bug: Oh, God, theater, gross! It's so schmaltzy, like so sincere! Like, oh, she should have some perspective. Postmodernism, ugh!

0:59:36 Brennan: [splats] And she is toast.

0:59:38 Siobhan: And then can I take a moment, just because we're in this fuckin' fancy adventuring bodega, to see if there's anything on the--

0:59:46 Emily: We might come back after.

0:59:47 Siobhan: Yeah, you're probably right, but just since we're here and I'm walking in your direction anyway, I can take a movement.

0:59:54 Brennan: Give me a Sleight of Hand check.

0:59:55 Siobhan: Great.

0:59:57 Murph: Sleight of Hand check.

0:59:58 Siobhan: I have such good Sleight of Hand. Uh, 19?

1:00:03 Brennan: You see that there's a little golden, seashell, pearl-studded hand mirror.

1:00:07 Misty: Oh, oh my god, I love this.

1:00:12 Siobhan: But I do it in that famous person way of like, I'm gonna take this. I love this so much.

1:00:17 Brennan: You see that the cat made of stars goes, [wind chimes shimmering]

1:00:20 La Gran Gata: How very interesting. I guess you can leave it on the counter and pay for it when you come back.

1:00:26 Misty: Sure, can I just check it out for just a second?

1:00:30 La Gran Gata: Wait a minute, you're Misty Moore, right?

1:00:33 Misty: Yeah, that's right.

1:00:34 La Gran Gata: Maybe you'll post on social media?

1:00:36 Misty: Oh, I would love to. You know, my friend Ricky, oh, I can't see— [violent buzzing]

1:00:42 La Gran Gata: We'll talk later.

1:00:44 Brennan: So, that's awesome. You pocket that little magic thing.

1:00:48 Siobhan: And then I...

1:00:51 Brennan: Move.

1:00:52 Siobhan: Move to where it would be.

1:00:52 Brennan: Cool, and you're out of the swarm of bugs, gotcha.

1:00:54 Siobhan: Yeah.

1:00:54 Brennan: Cool, cool, cool.

1:00:56 Ally: Is Bardic a bonus?

1:00:58 Siobhan: Oh, it is. Can I, since Kingston is right there, I'm gonna say, like...

1:01:02 Brennan: Yeah.

1:01:06 Misty: Kingston, have you lost some weight?

1:01:08 Kingston: Maybe.

1:01:09 Misty: You look great.

1:01:10 Kingston: Okay, all right.

1:01:11 Misty: Eating a lot of salad. [shimmering]

1:01:12 Kingston: Ey, ey.

1:01:13 Brennan: Hell yeah, Ricky, that's you.

1:01:15 Zac: Okay, um. Okay, everybody.

1:01:19 Ally: Okay, everybody.

1:01:21 Zac: I just realized that I have to do Concentration for that shield. What do I roll again for when that took 12 damage?

1:01:27 Brennan: You have to roll a DC 10 Constitution check.

1:01:29 Zac: Okay, 19.

1:01:31 Brennan: Cool, got it.

1:01:33 Zac: I think I'm just gonna go through this hole.

1:01:37 Brennan: Cool.

1:01:38 Zac: And try to cover the next hole.

1:01:41 Brennan: Awesome.

1:01:42 Zac: So that he can't get away.

1:01:45 Emily: That's a good move, great call.

1:01:46 Siobhan: Good head, smart, smart.

1:01:48 Brennan: Cool, so that's five, ten, fifteen, twenty, twenty-five, thirty, so you get to about here.

1:01:54 Zac: And I'm gonna ready an action. In case she tries to get by me, I'm gonna attack her.

1:01:59 Brennan: Awesome, very, very cool.

1:02:00 Siobhan: Oh, sick, there's another one on the other side.

1:02:03 Brennan: Dope. Okay, you guys hear the beetle… Absolutely destroys two of the rat swarms. [crashing] [mice squeaking]

1:02:18 Murph: Oh no.

1:02:19 Brennan: He's just taking care of business up on top of the roof. You hear, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom!

1:02:24 Rats: Brothers, though we die, we do not die in vain!

1:02:27 Zac: Wait, is he not halted still?

1:02:29 Brennan: He has to stay on the roof, yeah.

1:02:30 Zac: Oh, I gotcha.

1:02:32 Kingston: I can't do everything, Ricky, all right? I got the damn--

1:02:35 Ricky: I'm sorry.

1:02:36 Kugrash: You should have said, "Don't kill the rat."

1:02:37 Kingston: Okay, what the?

1:02:38 Brennan: Kugrash, it's gonna be you.

1:02:39 Ally: You should have blessed the rat!

1:02:40 Siobhan: You get one word with Command!

1:02:41 Lou: Y'all need to chill.

1:02:47 Kugrash: Um, hey, Pete, I bless you with the blessings of some pigeons who died near a church, and I-- I'm gonna Cure Wounds. You know what, I'll do a third-level. [holy shimmering]

1:03:01 Brennan: Cool.

1:03:01 Lou: My man.

1:03:03 Murph: Third-level Cure Wounds on Pete.

1:03:05 Ally: Thank you.

1:03:05 Brennan: Cool, go for it.

1:03:07 Murph: Oh, God damn it. Yo, I literally rolled two 1 in a row, I am insane. 9, ba-ba-ba, plus my, okay, 14.

1:03:15 Ally: Cool, thank you. [health bar whirring]

1:03:16 Brennan: Hell yeah. And is Kugrash moving anywhere, or what?

1:03:18 Murph: Yes, so that's an action, then I'm going to move in, just so I can see what's going on, but I think if I—

1:03:27 Brennan: You're still in the swarm of bugs there, by the way.

1:03:30 Murph: Oh, shit, okay, I don't wanna be in the swarm of bugs. [Emily sneezing]

1:03:32 Murph: Bless you, okay. Does it go through the door?

1:03:36 Brennan: It does go through the door.

1:03:37 Murph: Oh.

1:03:38 Brennan: You're not in it anymore, Ricky. You got out of it.

1:03:40 Zac: Okay, cool.

1:03:41 Emily: You got out, man. [sighing]

1:03:44 Murph: Okay, I'm going to, yeah, I'm just gonna run in and get as far as I can get in here.

1:03:51 Brennan: Cool, go ahead and count out your movement.

1:03:53 Zac: Can you move your fireball?

1:03:55 Murph: I can as a bonus action, but I think I have another idea. One...

1:03:57 Brennan: Two, three.

1:03:59 Murph: So two, three, four, five. I'll go like, in the corner here.

1:04:08 Brennan: Cool, you're out.

1:04:09 Murph: Sweet, and then I'm going to use a bonus action to summon the, I'm gonna summon a juicy cockroach. [holy shimmering]

1:04:23 Kugrash: These bugs were fuckin' here before you kids ruined the        neighborhood!

1:04:28 Murph: And I summon a juicy cockroach and me and Ricky get temp HP, 5 plus my druid level and plus advantage on Strength, so Strength saving throws. [health bars whirring]

1:04:38 Zac: Yeah.

1:04:39 Murph: So 5.

1:04:40 Emily: That's so good, because he might--

1:04:41 Murph: Plus my druid level, so 10.

1:04:43 Ally: Wow, that's sick.

1:04:47 Brennan: Rad, awesome. That's Kugrash. It's these roaches' turn. Are there any roaches even left in here?

1:04:55 Siobhan: Yeah, there's these, I don't know if this is--

1:04:57 Emily: There's one right here.

1:04:58 Brennan: Okay, there's one right here, too.

1:04:59 Siobhan: And there's two right here.

1:05:00 Brennan: There's two right here?

1:05:01 Emily: Oh no, those guys left, but--

1:05:02 Lou: Bugsters.

1:05:03 Ally: Oh yeah, they have like, star magic or whatever, but whatever.

1:05:06 Brennan: Yes, so these guys are gonna come for Ricky through here.

1:05:11 Ally: Do they pass through the sphere? Shit.

1:05:15 Brennan: They do not pass through the sphere, and there's some back here, too?

1:05:18 Ally: There's just one.

1:05:19 Siobhan: The bugster.

1:05:19 Lou: There's a bugster.

1:05:21 Brennan: Oh, the bugster, don't worry about the bugster. These guys are gonna go after Ricky. Both miss. These guys are unlucky, and then that's gonna be Sofia, that's you.

1:05:39 Emily: Okay, first off, before I exit this room, I saw what Misty did and I wanna look for a toy.

1:05:47 Brennan: Cool, give me a Sleight of Hand.

1:05:48 Emily: Okay. Oh, I knew this was gonna happen. I got a 10.

1:05:56 Brennan: The cat [chimes] winks at you. You roll with advantage.

1:05:58 Emily: Really?

1:05:59 Brennan: Yeah, you saved the cat.

1:06:02 Emily: Okay, that's gonna be a 21.

1:06:08 Brennan: You see that there is a small golden ring that has an embossment on it of a closed fist, so like a bust of a fist on a small golden ring.

1:06:20 Emily: Oh my God, I look at the cat and I start to put it on.

1:06:23 Sofia: Is this okay?

1:06:25 La Gran Gata: Please, help yourself, you saved my life, and you gave me the good chin scratches.

1:06:32 Emily: I give some more chinny scratchies.

1:06:34 La Gran Gata: Oh, this is so good. It is not the same with your paws.

1:06:39 Emily: And then I wanna run through the store and liberate these locals.

1:06:43 Brennan: Hell yeah, go for it.

1:06:45 Emily: So I run through this door.

1:06:46 Brennan: Go ahead and grab your figure and move it.

1:06:47 Emily: Yeah, and then I think I'm just gonna go to town on this cocoon.

1:06:52 Brennan: Dope, go ahead. I'll say that these are DC 15 Athletics checks, just to simplify it a little bit.

1:07:01 Emily: Oh okay, cool. Ugh, oh wait, but I'm blessed. 15, okay, 4 plus 3, 7 plus 7, 14 god dammit.

1:07:11 Brennan: So you rush in, pop, pop, pop. You get a lot of the way through, but they're still trapped in here.

1:07:16 Emily: Can I use my second attack to do another one?

1:07:19 Brennan: Sure, give me another roll.

1:07:22 Emily: Okay, that's gonna be a 27.

1:07:26 Brennan: You rip the cocoons up to these two people in the laundromat and they go,

1:07:29 Locals: [panting] Oh my God, thank you, thank you, you're a hero. Do you think if I leave my stuff here, I can come back and get it later? Because I just have one more load in my apartment.

1:07:38 Sofia: Absolutely.You know what, I'll fold it. I'll throw it in with some wrinkle stuff because it's probably gonna be pretty wrinkled after this.

1:07:43 Locals: I can imagine, these bugs are from hell!

1:07:46 Sofia: Yeah, they really are, get out of here.

1:07:47 Brennan: These two locals sprint away.

1:07:49 Sofia: Tell everyone that Sofia the Sorceress saved you.

1:07:54 Brennan: Two swarms left to attack, go for it.

1:07:55 Murph: Sweet, get that fuckin' bug, guys. They are gonna attack the bug. I think, 12 and a 15.

1:08:05 Brennan: 12 and 15, the 15 hits.

1:08:07 Murph: 8.

1:08:08 Ally: Ey.

1:08:09 Brennan: Hell yeah. You hear the beetle outside going,

1:08:12 Beetle: Ow, God damn it, what the fuck?

1:08:14 Brennan: And you hear the rats being like,

1:08:17 Rats: Though we be but little, we are fierce! Believe in yourselves!

1:08:24 Brennan: Great, so that's the swarms. Back to Becky. She looks at you, Ricky, with your readied action.

1:08:38 Ricky: That's enough, come on.

1:08:41 Ally: I can hear it from the other room, and I'm just like. [rubs the bridge of their nose]

1:08:43 Murph: So convincing, such a commanding voice. It must be killing you that there's a fireball right there.

1:08:47 Ricky: I hate it.

1:08:48 Brennan: I'm gonna need you to make a Wisdom saving throw.

1:08:50 Zac: Okay.

1:08:52 Lou: You blessed, Ricky.

1:08:53 Emily: Ricky, you're blessed.

1:08:53 Zac: With Bless. Ugh, that's only 4, 8, 9.

1:09:01 Brennan: Your saving throw, you got a 9?

1:09:03 Zac: I got a 9, but can I use a Luck point?

1:09:05 Brennan: Yes, you may.

1:09:05 Zac: Great, great, great.

1:09:07 Emily: Okay.

1:09:08 Ally: Come on, Ricky.

1:09:08 Brennan: So this is your second Luck point?

1:09:09 Zac: This is my second Luck point and you've been bad to me, but I think you're gonna be good to me this time. Eh, so, I rolled a 6, so now I have 11.

1:09:22 Ally: Fuck.

1:09:22 Zac: Can I use a third Luck point?

1:09:24 Brennan: I don't think you can use a third luck point.

1:09:26 Murph: Had to ask.

1:09:28 Ally: Yeah.

1:09:28 Brennan: Let me double-check. Yeah, I don't think you can use another one.

1:09:37 Zac: Okay, cool. [Brennan sighing]

1:09:41 Lou: Don't do that, don't sigh like that.

1:09:43 Brennan: You see, Ricky, you stand with your axe fully ready, and you see Becky looks at you and says,

1:09:51 Becky: Um, I'm so sorry, I know you wanna hit me with that axe or whatever because you're like, I don't know, you hate change, but Pete's here now and a lot's gonna change.

1:10:07 Brennan: Your questing blade clatters to the ground. You guys watch Ricky double over. His body changes. [flesh ripping] [growling]

1:10:18 Brennan: You see that she begins to try and warp you into becoming an insect. Pete, I will allow you, if you want to, to spend a sorcery point to not have this be as bad as it's going to be

1:10:32 Ally: Yeah, totally, yeah, yeah, yeah, so.

1:10:35 Brennan: Pete, you try, [whooshing] but you realize that, again, her magic's coming from you and she reaches out. As you begin to turn into a bug, Pete does something. Your magic won't let you stop it, but you can change it.

1:10:48 Emily: What if I give you a Ki point, too? Hah, I'm just kidding.

1:10:51 Brennan: Ricky is gone, and a little dog is there on the ground.

1:10:55 Siobhan: Oh, Ricky! [dog barking] [groaning]

1:10:58 Siobhan: You're so cute!

1:10:58 Emily: That's cute.

1:10:58 Siobhan: It's a buff-ass dog.

1:11:03 Brennan: Ricky, you have a hard time remembering any of the things that have happened. You know you have friends, you know you're a good boy, but it's hard to remember what else.

1:11:19 Zac: Okay.

1:11:20 Kugrash: Hey Ricky, you can understand me, right? I'm a Circle of Shepherds druid, I can talk to animals.

1:11:25 Murph: Is he like a dog for all purposes?

1:11:28 Brennan: You are still somewhere, Ricky Matsui, even if you don't remember that name, but yeah, you could talk to Kugrash.

1:11:35 Ricky: Who’s Ricky? I'm Ricky?

1:11:36 Kugrash: You're Ricky.

1:11:36 Ricky: Oh great, okay.

1:11:37 Kugrash: You're a firefighter.

1:11:38 Ricky: Yeah, I am? Awesome.

1:11:41 Ally: Can I Mindlink with everyone? Can I roll an Insight check and see if me, like, running would take power away from them, or?

1:11:48 Brennan: Make an Insight check to see what would happen.

1:11:50 Ally: 2.

1:11:51 Brennan: You don't know, you don't know your own magic.

1:11:53 Ally: Fucker.

1:11:56 Brennan: Becky turns you into a dog, flies overhead, rushes in here. You can still try to take your attack, but now you're attacking with a dog's attack bonus.

1:12:09 Zac: I know the thing did this to me, right?

1:12:11 Brennan: Yes, you do.

1:12:12 Zac: Well, I'm just gonna try to bite it.

1:12:14 Brennan: Go ahead and roll an attack roll. For a dog, I'm--

1:12:16 Lou: Is the dog blessed? Did I bless the dog?

1:12:19 Zac: The dog is still blessed, it's still there.

1:12:20 Emily: A blessed dog!

1:12:22 Zac: I don't get two attacks now.

1:12:23 Brennan: Just one, I'm afraid.

1:12:25 Lou: A dog only attacks once.

1:12:31 Zac: It's not a disease, right?

1:12:33 Lou: Yeah, I can't cure this?

1:12:34 Zac: You're blessed.

1:12:35 Siobhan: I can maybe do something.

1:12:38 Emily: If you hit with, wait, wait, does he still have Sentinel, even as a dog?

1:12:44 Brennan: I believe you still have Sentinel.

1:12:45 Emily: If he hits a creature with an opportunity attack, the creature's speed becomes zero for the rest of the turn. Brennan laughs, wheezing a little.

1:12:51 Siobhan: Oh my God.

1:12:52 Zac: All right, well, let's see if I...

1:12:53 Brennan: Let's see, your bonus to this is you have a plus 3 to hit.

1:12:57 Zac: My dog bonus.

1:12:59 Brennan: Plus 3. You roll with a plus 3.

1:13:02 Zac: This is hard.

1:13:04 Emily: But you have a chance.

1:13:04 Brennan: Go ahead and roll.

1:13:07 Zac: Okay, Bless. Um, a 15.

1:13:11 Brennan: You hit! [cast cheering]

1:13:13 Brennan: So you see, Becky turns you into a dog, you reach up, latch onto one of her insect legs and— [dog growling]

1:13:19 Brennan: Keep her from flying further away. Hell yes. So, she's just right over here. [growling]

1:13:29 Becky: Ah, bad dog, fuck you, bad dog! [growling]

1:13:32 Brennan: You actually can roll a 1d6 plus 1 damage.

1:13:39 Zac: A 2. 2 damage.

1:13:42 Brennan: Hell yeah.

1:13:43 Zac: Really bad time over here.

1:13:44 Ally: Wow, I'm so sorry, Ricky.

1:13:48 Brennan: But you do see that the cloud of insects disappears as she turns you into a dog. That's going to be Kingston, that's you.

1:13:56 Lou: Great, can I take a step back and cast Guiding Bolt on this last bugster that's still in here?

1:14:04 Brennan: Where is it? Oh yeah, this person right here?

1:14:05 Lou: Yeah.

1:14:05 Brennan: Yes, you can.

1:14:06 Lou: Great.

1:14:07 Emily: Yeah, fuck 'em up.

1:14:09 Zac: Oh my God, I'm a dog.

1:14:10 Lou: Uh, 17?

1:14:11 Brennan: A 17 hits.

1:14:13 Lou: Great, so come on, 5. Got a 9, got a 14, 18.

1:14:23 Brennan: Uh, 18 damage?

1:14:24 Lou: 18 damage.

1:14:25 Brennan: You extend your hand. [ominous music]

1:14:28 Brennan: The stars around the bodega come to your call and are released, phew, as like, little bulbs of streetlamp light, [rapid shooting]

1:14:38 Brennan: And eviscerate this bugster. They are no more.

1:14:41 Lou: Fantastic.

1:14:46 Brennan: So, and then your movement.

1:14:48 Lou: Great, and I'll come on in. Let's go one, two, three, four.

1:14:54 Brennan: Mhm.

1:14:55 Lou: Five, six.

1:14:58 Brennan: Cool.

1:14:59 Kugrash: Welcome to the party, Kingston. Ricky's a dog now.

1:15:01 Kingston: What?

1:15:02 Kugrash: Yeah, it's fucked up.

1:15:04 Kingston: Like a little—

1:15:05 Kugrash: Like, he's this fucking dog right here.

1:15:09 Brennan: You see there's a dog pulling on this—

1:15:11 Emily: What breed, what breed?

1:15:13 Brennan: I think he's like a large, brindled, gray and black Akita. [Emily gasping]

1:15:18 Ally: Aw, sweet.

1:15:18 Siobhan: So cute.

1:15:18 Emily: Cute.

1:15:19 Brennan: Kinda like a wolfy, hunting little dog.

1:15:21 Ally: Fuck yeah, Akitas are dope.

1:15:22 Sofia: Hi, do you like chinny rubs?

1:15:25 Ally: Aw.

1:15:26 Zac: I'm still attacking this giant wasp.

1:15:29 Brennan: Incredible, that's going to be… That's Kingston, roaches go. These two roaches are gonna go for Kugrash now, ba-ba-bum. Both miss, not even a single roach has hit. Sofia, that's you.

1:15:50 Emily: Okay, I wanna hop up onto this row of dryers and then beeline it for the wasp and jump onto her, attacking her.

1:15:58 Brennan: Hell yes, so that's gonna be...

1:15:59 Emily: With a Flurry of Blows.

1:16:00 Zac: A beeline for the wasp?

1:16:02 Brennan: Five, ten, fifteen, twenty, twenty-five, thirty, thirty-five, fourty.

1:16:07 Emily: And then I have an extra 10, yeah.

1:16:08 Brennan: That's right, because of the cat, cool.

1:16:10 Emily: But I wanna dive onto her.

1:16:11 Brennan: Oh, do you wanna try to grapple her or do you wanna make attacks?

1:16:14 Emily: No, I mean I wanna make attacks, but airborne.

1:16:17 Brennan: Hell yeah.

1:16:18 Ally: Go for it.

1:16:20 Emily: And I'm gonna Flurry of Blows also.

1:16:22 Brennan: Jesus.

1:16:24 Emily: Okay, does a 17 hit and does a 24 hit? I guess they do, because you had a 15.

1:16:35 Zac: Yeah, hopefully.

1:16:36 Brennan: You see she throws a shield up, like a magical shield. [magical shimmering]

1:16:41 Emily: Okay, well, I'm also blessed, so let me add 2 to the, so it's 19 and 24.

1:16:47 Brennan: Hold on one second.

1:16:48 Emily: And 19 and 28.

1:16:51 Brennan: 19 and 28, Jesus. The 19, yeah, the 19 hits.

1:17:01 Ally: That's you.

1:17:02 Emily: The 19 hits, as does the 28.

1:17:04 Emily: Ugh, okay.

1:17:05 Brennan: Go ahead and roll damage.

1:17:06 Emily: So I'm gonna hit her for..

1:17:07 Ally: You're so tall.

1:17:08 Emily: 9 and 7, so I hit her for 16, and then I'm Flurry of Blows-ing, so I'm gonna hit her twice more.

1:17:16 Brennan: Cool.

1:17:19 Emily: And let's see. 2, 3, so 12 plus 8. 20 and 11 plus 8, 19.

1:17:29 Brennan: Another 19 damage?

1:17:31 Emily: No, no, no, another, yeah.

1:17:32 Brennan: 20 and then 19 to hit? Both of those hit.

1:17:35 Emily: Okay, so that's gonna be another 10 and another 10, so then another 20!

1:17:40 Murph: Whoa.

1:17:40 Ally: Wow.

1:17:41 Emily: [punching] Pow, pow, pow, pow.

1:17:42 Brennan: You guys see, I don't, are you drunk anymore after the whole thing with the cat?

1:17:45 Emily: I'm wasted! Emily sways around wildly.

1:17:46 Brennan: You're fuckin', yeah, you see that you are, you vomit a little bit in your mouth. [mystical shimmering]

1:17:52 Brennan: Stars are swirling around you. You see that the stars are actually like, pinging off of Sofia to keep her up, and again, these like, twirling—

1:18:01 Emily: I wanna bicycle kick, Liu Kang style, for one of my attacks.

1:18:04 Brennan: Oh yeah, you like hop up and—

1:18:05 Emily: With stilettos.

1:18:06 Brennan: Yeah, pow-pow-pow-pow-pow. You stab her four times in the head with your stiletto heels. She is on death's fucking door. Her weird bug skull is caved in. She is so close to being dead.

1:18:17 Emily: Oh, yeah.

1:18:19 Brennan: That's gonna be the swarms.

1:18:20 Emily: And then I land and chinny rub. [mimes petting the Ricky dog]

1:18:22 Brennan: Land, chinny rubs, an insane round. The swarms go, well actually, sorry, no, the beetle.

1:18:31 Emily: Yo, those rats, though.

1:18:32 Murph: My rats.

1:18:33 Brennan: Oh, the rats are fuckin' toast, they're done. The rat swarms are done. Becky vanishes in mist. [whooshing] Vanish, gone.

1:18:42 Ally: Fuck.

1:18:43 Zac: Even though her movement's zero?

1:18:45 Emily: Even though she had a dog attack?

1:18:46 Brennan: She just did a spell, just a spell.

1:18:47 Emily: Oh, she's probably still here. She's like, probably gaseous form or something.

1:18:49 Zac: Am I a goner from fire here?

1:18:50 Brennan: No.

1:18:51 Siobhan: Or Misty Step, maybe.

1:18:54 Brennan: Phew, vanishes. That's going to be...

1:18:58 Zac: I'm just a dog, sniffing around.

1:19:00 Emily: Where could she, she has to see where she Misty Steps to, right?

1:19:03 Murph: Did she Misty Step or did she just teleport or something?

1:19:06 Siobhan: Yeah, who knows?

1:19:07 Emily: He said she disappears in mist, which feels misty.

1:19:09 Siobhan: Yeah, okay.

1:19:11 Brennan: Yeah, it's gonna be Pete's turn.

1:19:12 Ally: Okay, cool. I'm still like floating, right?

1:19:17 Brennan: Yes, you are still floating, that's correct.

1:19:18 Ally: Could I float kinda over these bugs and just go straight from door to door into this new place?

1:19:24 Brennan: Yeah, you totally could.

1:19:26 Ally: Okay.

1:19:27 Murph: How fucked up are you?

1:19:28 Ally: I'm at 19 now.

1:19:28 Brennan: One, two, three.

1:19:29 Ally: Which isn't that bad.

1:19:29 Brennan: Four, five, six. You can take a double move if you want to keep moving. Thank you.

1:19:34 Ally: Ugh, a bunch of bugs and people. Oh no, it's up there.

1:19:38 Siobhan: What the fuck is this?

1:19:40 Ally: Yeah, some dude. Okay, so I'm peeking my head in there, and so I'm gonna cast Scorching Ray.

1:19:50 Brennan: Awesome, go ahead and make your attacks.

1:19:53 Ally: Uh, it's how many?

1:19:54 SI: Three, I think.

1:19:55 Zac: It's three, yeah.

1:19:55 Murph: It's three, yeah.

1:19:56 Ally: Can I use this?

1:19:56 Murph: Yep.

1:19:59 Ally: Sheesh, come on, man.

1:20:00 Murph: Plus your spell attack modifier, so 12, 18, and 25?

1:20:08 Ally: And I have Bless, so I could bless that 12 with a 1.

1:20:11 Brennan: So 13?

1:20:11 Ally: 13.

1:20:12 Brennan: 13, 14, and 26, or something like that, or how much is it?

1:20:16 Murph: It's 13, 18, and 25.

1:20:18 Brennan: 13, 18, 25, awesome. Who are you trying to hit?

1:20:22 Ally: I can throw the 13 on a regular cockroach and then the 25 on the hipster cockroach and then the 18 on the other cockroach.

1:20:30 Brennan: Cool, go ahead and roll damage.

1:20:31 Ally: Cool.

1:20:32 Murph: So that's a 2d6 on each, or is it?

1:20:33 Lou: [quietly, crosstalk to Emily] You keep a pair of scissors on you this whole time?

1:20:35 Brennan: 2d6 on each, yeah.

1:20:36 Ally: 2d6 on each.

1:20:36 Emily: Yeah.

1:20:39 Ally: Two. Yeah! Ally rolls rather aggressively. One of their dice falls off the table, which causes a much louder thump after a moment.

1:20:42 Murph: Oh, shit.

1:20:42 Siobhan: Ally, good God.

1:20:45 Ally: What was it?

1:20:45 Murph: Just sit, it's gone.

1:20:46 Ally: What was it though?

1:20:47 Murph: It's down there.

1:20:48 Ally: Oh, the water bottles fell.

1:20:49 Emily: It doesn't count if it's on the floor unless it's a 6.

1:20:50 Murph: It doesn't count if it's not a 6.

1:20:50 Brennan: No, it does not count on the floor.

1:20:51 Murph: Roll it again.

1:20:52 Ally: All right, I got three 6 though, bitches.

1:20:54 Brennan: You have to roll it again for each because they're each a separate attack.

1:20:57 Ally: What's that?

1:20:58 Brennan: You can't decide how to determine them, so like.

1:21:00 Ally: Oh, I got you.

1:21:01 Brennan: So we'll say that's one, that's one, and then roll that dice.

1:21:03 Ally: Okay, yeah, 5. Fuck yeah.

1:21:06 Brennan: Okay.

1:21:07 Ally: 12, 11, and 3.

1:21:09 Brennan: Okay, which one is which? So you're hitting the bugster with which one? right in the doorway, and then three on the cockroach that's further away.

1:21:22 Brennan: Cool, one of these roaches is-- [fire blazing]

1:21:25 Brennan: Just toast. That one takes some serious damage. Hell yeah, that's now going to be… This bugster's going to, phew, rush in here, because you're like, at the doorway basically. He's gonna rush in and attempt to fuck you up.

1:21:44 Ally: Oh, I cast Shield so that my AC goes up by five.

1:21:47 Brennan: As your reaction, cool.

1:21:48 Zac: If something comes in within five feet of me, is it within five feet of me? I can use Sentinel on it.

1:21:54 Brennan: You could, but he's just in the doorway right now.

1:21:55 Zac: Oh, okay, yeah.

1:21:56 Brennan: He's fuckin' with Pete. That's gonna be a miss.

1:21:59 Zac: I'm a very good dog.

1:22:03 Brennan: That's also gonna be a miss on Pete with that shield, so you burn a first-level spell slot for the shield.

1:22:07 Ally: Yeah.

1:22:07 Brennan: Bugster misses. That's now going to be Misty.

1:22:13 Ally: Cool.

1:22:14 Siobhan: I would like to cast Dispel Magic on Young Master Matsui.

1:22:21 Emily: Ooh.

1:22:22 Brennan: Ooh, let me double-check this real quick.

1:22:26 Siobhan: So if it's a third-level or lower, the target, it just ends, and if it's above a third-level, it's DC 10 plus the spell's level against my attack roll.

1:22:38 Brennan: You have to beat a DC 14.

1:22:41 Siobhan: All right.

1:22:42 Ally: Okay.

1:22:44 Murph: Are you blessed or anything?

1:22:45 Siobhan: No.

1:22:45 Ally: Bardic, or?

1:22:47 Siobhan: I can't give myself, can I give myself Bardic Inspiration? I didn't think so, that seemed like some bullshit. Nat 20, baby. [cast cheers]

1:22:57 Ally: [screaming] Yes! This fuckin' game! You're kidding me, oh my God! [howling]

1:23:06 Brennan: You step in.

1:23:10 Ally: [holding up a picture of a gray Akita on their phone] Say good-bye.

1:23:12 Misty: You were a good boy, Ricky.

1:23:14 Emily: I'm just gonna be, I'm still chinny rubbing him as he transforms back.

1:23:18 Brennan: You see, Misty, you step in, raise your hand aloft.

1:23:20 Ally: What the fuck?

1:23:22 Brennan: Shape changing magic is your bread and fuckin' butter. You guys see, I mean like, the broken hip and some scary stuff going on. The wind kicks up and for a moment, you guys see a face of Misty that is not the fun, vivacious, older, whip-smart person, but a face of regal beauty from a timeless age and a land beyond dreaming, and you lift the form of this animal, and you guys see literally that like, the dog turns brighter, [magical shimmering]

1:23:56 Brennan: And as an image of light, just phew, raises through the ceiling and vanishes and Ricky's just where the dog was.

1:24:03 Zac: I'm just naked. I'm sorry. Sofia, who had been giving dog Ricky chinny rubs, immediately snatches her hands back.

1:24:06 Ally: Just ripped.

1:24:08 Brennan: I'm gonna say though, I'm gonna roll something. Ricky, your ears are a little bit pointier than they used to be and you can smell a whole bunch of stuff you didn't use to be able to smell.

1:24:21 Ricky: [sniffing] What happened?

1:24:24 Brennan: In-fucking-credible.

1:24:25 Ally: Wow.

1:24:26 Siobhan: And then I'd like to, I mean, I'd still like to take a move.

1:24:29 Brennan: Yes, absolutely. There's a bunch of shit going on over there.

1:24:31 Ally: Yeah, yeah.

1:24:32 Brennan: If you wanna swap that dog out for Ricky.

1:24:34 Lou: Swap that dog out.

1:24:35 Brennan: Ha, swap the dog out.

1:24:37 Ally: Ricky, I'm floating above you.

1:24:45 Siobhan: I mean, there's not much I can do in here. I guess I'll just hang out down here, and then since I'm here, I'm gonna say to Ricky,

1:24:57 Misty: Ricky, you made a great dog, but you're an even better firefighter. [magical shimmering]

1:25:03 Zac: I just cry a little bit.

1:25:05 Siobhan: Bardic Inspiration.

1:25:07 Brennan: You start crying, the axe— [whooshing]

1:25:10 Brennan: Comes up off the ground into your hand. It is your turn.

1:25:13 Ricky: Oh, did I miss anything? I'm assuming not.

1:25:17 Kugrash: Uh, nah.

1:25:18 Kingston: We'll catch you up later, go, go.

1:25:19 Pete: There's a bugster right through that door.

1:25:20 Kugrash: The big bug disappeared.

1:25:22 Sofia: Did you see the cat?

1:25:25 Ricky: I missed all of that, I think.

1:25:26 Sofia: Oh my God.

1:25:27 Zac: I'm just gonna go through the door and I guess, since the bug hipster, the bugster right there is right in front of me, I'm gonna have to smack it.

1:25:37 Brennan: Yeah, hell yeah. You go to the doorway. The bug's just in the doorway. Go ahead and take your attack.

1:25:46 Zac: First one is like 24.

1:25:49 Brennan: That definitely hits.

1:25:50 Zac: Second one is more.

1:25:54 Brennan: Hell yeah, go ahead and roll damage.

1:25:57 Zac: Damage is 1d8, sorry.

1:25:59 Brennan: 1d8's right there, roll it.

1:26:02 Zac: 9 and 12.

1:26:05 Ally: Fuck yeah.

1:26:06 Brennan: Is that?

1:26:06 Zac: 9 and 12.

1:26:07 Brennan: 21?

1:26:07 Zac: Yeah.

1:26:09 Brennan: You see Ricky back in his full form. God, he's a jacked dude. Steps through the doorway and you see this bugster goes like,

1:26:16 Bugster: Oh, what's up, man? Hey, so we're kind of super into killing you guys right now.

1:26:22 Brennan: Wham, your axe cleaves his chest apart, green goo flies everywhere. [goo oozing] This bugster is dead.

1:26:30 Ally: Yes!

1:26:30 Emily: Whoo!

1:26:31 Ricky: Always hated how you make me feel a little dumb.

1:26:35 Brennan: Hell yeah, that's going to be, you guys hear… Boom, boom, boom. [crashing] And you hear a smash in the bodega as the beetle [crashing] collapses into the store.

1:26:45 Siobhan: Roll up.

1:26:55 Brennan: That's now going to be, that was the beetle, Kugrash, that's you.

1:27:00 Murph: Sweet, okay. I guess first thing's first, I got a little bonus action, so I'm gonna move the fireball onto one of these little cockroach guys.

1:27:11 Brennan: Hell yeah.

1:27:12 Murph: So they do a Dex save, or the one guy does a Dex save. And takes 8 if he doesn't save.

1:27:21 Brennan: Hell yeah, I don't think those guys have been injured before, so yes, you horribly burn one of them.

1:27:26 Murph: Great, and then, you know what? Let's keep, yeah, I'm gonna keep fuckin' with this big guy over here. I would like to Conjure Animals and use it as a spell. The last one was Rat King Crown. I think it's up to you what I make, but I'm thinkin' some kind of like, stray dogs or stray cats or something like that.

1:27:47 Brennan: Hell yeah.

1:27:48 Murph: Like, I can do up to eight beasts of Challenge Rating a quarter or lower, so I would like to make eight.

1:27:56 Brennan: Eight beasts of Challenge Rating quarter or lower.

1:27:59 Murph: Yeah.

1:27:59 Brennan: Hell yes. You see, Jesus.

1:28:06 Murph: Or I could do two, like, beefy dogs. I think a dire wolf might be Challenge Rating one.

1:28:12 Brennan: Cool.

1:28:14 Murph: That would be two.

1:28:15 Brennan: Hell yeah, I'm gonna say that you go ahead and summon, yeah, you summon some crazy stuff.

1:28:20 Murph: Oh, hell yeah.

1:28:25 Brennan: An enormous fucking spider jumps down and this huge stray street mutt all comes running in from the outside and begin to attack.

1:28:36 Emily: Whoa.

1:28:37 Brennan: Go ahead and roll initiative for them. They'll act on the same initiative.

1:28:41 Murph: Sweet, 17 plus whatever their Dex is.

1:28:46 Brennan: Um, cool.

1:28:48 Murph: Sick, sick.

1:28:48 Siobhan: Tight, tight, tight.

1:28:49 Brennan: Hell yeah.

1:28:49 Lou: Sick, sick.

1:28:50 Brennan: That's Kug. [tense music]

1:28:52 Brennan: These roaches are about to go. These guys rush up here. They're gonna take some swings at Ricky. This guy gets away from the, these two are coming for Kug, ba-ba-bum.

1:29:04 Zac: Any of them within five feet of me, the ones that go for Kug?

1:29:06 Ally: Oh, there's one down there?

1:29:07 Brennan: There's one down here? Oh, this one, yeah, here you go. This guy's coming for Kingston. These guys are going for Misty. Here we go, these two coming for Ricky. They missed, he's coming for Kugrash.

1:29:19 Zac: Do I get to hit the ones coming for Kugrash if they are within five?

1:29:23 Brennan: They're not. Oh, they actually are within five feet of you.

1:29:26 Zac: Or I get maybe one?

1:29:28 Brennan: Ricky, go ahead, one of them goes to attack Kugrash. You get a swing on it.

1:29:31 Zac: All right. Ooh, 19 plus, yeah.

1:29:34 Brennan: Yeah, huge, go ahead and roll damage.

1:29:37 Zac: Uh, d8 plus a d8.

1:29:37 Murph: Kill 'em, please. Kill them, kid.

1:29:40 Zac: Oh yeah, 8 plus 7. [flesh ripping]

1:29:43 Brennan: Hah, decapitated. You don't even look, you just wail out behind you and annihilate one of these roaches, awesome. That was the roach. I'm actually gonna roll a Luck check here real quick. You just killed the roach that otherwise would have scored a nat 20 against Kugrash. [various shocked “ohh”ing from the cast]

1:30:05 Murph: I have no idea so I'm just like,

1:30:07 Kugrash: Eh, good job, kid, you killed a cockroach.

1:30:10 Brennan: I'm gonna need a Constitution check from you.

1:30:12 Murph: All right. [groaning]

1:30:17 Murph: I'm blessed but I'm not blessed in real life, so I got an 11.

1:30:20 Zac: Oh, yeah. I guess my spells--

1:30:21 Brennan: 11 saves.

1:30:24 Murph: Oh, good.

1:30:24 Zac: My AC thing is gone, probably.

1:30:28 Brennan: Yes, Concentration thing, yeah. You take seven points of damage. [health bar whirring]

1:30:31 Murph: Okay. I need to, 7 points of damage, I need to maintain Concentration to keep my dog and my spider.

1:30:35 Brennan: Go ahead and roll. Go ahead and roll.

1:30:39 Murph: Yeah, come on, baby, stay with me. Is it a check or a saving throw?

1:30:43 Brennan: Saving throw.

1:30:44 Murph: I can do blessing?

1:30:44 Brennan: Yeah.

1:30:45 Murph: Great. Truly incredible, truly incredible.

1:30:48 Ally: Off of a roll from a 22.

1:30:50 Murph: I got a fucking 7.

1:30:53 Brennan: You see that the spider and dog both come in and the dog goes,

1:30:57 Dog: [deep voice] Kugrash, my mentor. I've come to, ah, this guy's big!

1:31:02 Brennan: And he turns and runs out the door. The spider says,

1:31:04 Spider: [posh British] We shall play another time, Kugrash of the sewers. I have answered your call, but I am too scared to fight.

1:31:15 Kugrash: Hey, fucking bums. I'm your Goddamn druid.

1:31:19 Emily: I think you should bring that spider back again some time, I like him.

1:31:22 Ally: What was that smoking hot-ass spider?

1:31:24 Murph: He's a fucking punk. He says he's gonna show up and then he doesn't show up.

1:31:27 Ally: Jack of all trades.

1:31:27 Emily: Ooh, I like spider.

1:31:29 Brennan: Sofia, it's gonna be you.

1:31:30 Emily: Okay, so I want to sort of listen to if I hear anyone on the ceiling. I'm trying to figure out if Becky might be up there through the roof.

1:31:40 Brennan: Give me a Perception check.

1:31:41 Emily: Okay, it's gonna be… Uh, 19.

1:31:50 Brennan: You don't think she's on the roof.

1:31:52 Emily: Okay, then I am gonna run through here and go through here.

1:31:58 Brennan: Okay.

1:31:59 Emily: So, one, two, oh, I'm gonna let them both get opportunity attacks on me.

1:32:06 Brennan: Cool, you could also do the Flurry of Blows thing and do the, you know, like--

1:32:12 Emily: Okay, I'll do that. So I'm gonna come here and I'm gonna Flurry of Blows one of them.

1:32:17 Brennan: Cool, make an attack.

1:32:19 Emily: Okay. Oh, I don't think I'm gonna hit either one.

1:32:25 Siobhan: Wow.

1:32:25 Ally: Do you have Bardic, or?

1:32:26 Siobhan: That is a 1 and a 2.

1:32:28 Emily: No, but I do get to add, I'll add, let's see. Let's go for the 4 for this one. So does 14 hit?

1:32:36 Brennan: 14 does hit.

1:32:37 Emily: Okay, what about 12?

1:32:38 Brennan: A 12 does not.

1:32:41 Emily: Okay, well, I'll hit them with one. And that's gonna be 7.

1:32:47 Brennan: You hit the injured one, dead, pff.

1:32:49 Emily: Sweet, and then I still have two unarmed strikes. Can I go at the other guy?

1:32:53 Brennan: Yeah, if you want.

1:32:54 Emily: Yeah, okay, and then… Oh, that's kinda crooked, but whatever. Then I'll, okay, so I'll do… So 19, yeah, they both hit, let's just say that.

1:33:08 Brennan: Cool, hell yeah, go for it.

1:33:09 Emily: And then, 6... [tense music] Uh, 15.

1:33:14 Brennan: Toast, pff.

1:33:15 Emily: Sweet, and then I'm gonna use my Drunken Technique to take a Dash and then hop through here.

1:33:20 Ally: Whoa.

1:33:21 Brennan: Okay, so you Flurry, right?

1:33:22 Emily: Yeah.

1:33:23 Brennan: So you don't take attacks of opportunity and your speed, I think, plus 10. Plus the 10 you get from the--

1:33:29 Emily: So I'm sixty.

1:33:30 Brennan: So that's five, ten, fifteen, twenty,

1:33:33 Emily: Oh, I can do Acrobatic, if you want me to do Acrobatic checks.

1:33:35 Brennan: So it's just five, ten, fifteen, twenty. Yeah, give me an Acrobatics to clear the hole.

1:33:43 Emily: Okay, so I got a 16. Is she in here?

1:33:50 Brennan: She is not in there.

1:33:52 Emily: God damn.

1:33:53 Siobhan: What's in there?

1:33:54 Ally: Oh, it's a pizza parlor.

1:33:54 Brennan: It's a pizzeria. A little pizza parlor.

1:33:56 Siobhan: Oh nice, get a slice.

1:33:57 Brennan: So, okay, that's gonna be five, ten, fifteen, twenty, twenty-five, thirty, thirty-five, fourty.

1:34:01 Murph: Jumpin' about.

1:34:05 Siobhan: Go to the next hole.

1:34:05 Emily: Go to the next one, I want to go into here.

1:34:07 Brennan: Uh, forty-five, fifty.

1:34:10 Murph: Shit, this is—

1:34:11 Ally: Oh, we can't back you up, though.

1:34:12 Murph: This is insane.

1:34:12 Emily: That's okay.

1:34:13 Brennan: You get in the pub.

1:34:15 Emily: Ooh, lively.

1:34:17 Zac: Lively.

1:34:21 Brennan: Hell yes.

1:34:22 Siobhan: Oh, you're in the kitchen?

1:34:24 Brennan: You're in the kitchen.

1:34:25 Siobhan: What's in there?

1:34:25 Brennan: So that's gonna be, yeah, give me one more Acrobatics.

1:34:32 Emily: Okay.

1:34:33 Brennan: Hell yeah.

1:34:34 Emily: I mean, I definitely make it.

1:34:36 Brennan: You are standing--

1:34:39 Emily: On a lit stove?

1:34:40 Brennan: Not on a lit stove. You're like, where can I get your figure--

1:34:45 Emily: I can be on the stove.

1:34:46 Brennan: Cool, you're on the stove. You look out and hear Becky over in this room, talking to another bugster.

1:34:55 Emily: I look through that little porthole and I'm like,

1:34:56 Sofia: Caught ya, bitch.

1:34:58 Brennan: But you guys see like, pow-pow-pow, take out these two roaches, and just, your Acrobatics stat, when you go through both of these holes, you are not like parkour leaping. You're more like just, flinging your limp body.

1:35:13 Emily: Can we say in one of them I do like a home plate slide through the ooze? So I'm covered in ooze.

1:35:16 Brennan: Yes, absolutely.

1:35:18 Murph: Oh, gross.

1:35:18 Brennan: Yes, you're like, pff. You get through here. There's like pizza people that are all tied up in this room, but there's no active monsters. There's like some little ones. You're in here with the big roach, though. That's your movement and action. Truly, what an insane move.

1:35:30 Emily: Whoo!

1:35:33 Brennan: That's going to be--

1:35:35 Emily: I think I beat my chest and chug my CamelBak of wine.

1:35:39 Brennan: Hell yeah. I'm gonna need you now to make a… I'm gonna need you to make another Constitution saving throw.

1:35:48 Emily: Constitution, okay. It's as good as it could be. Okay, 16.

1:35:59 Brennan: 16.

1:36:01 Emily: 16.

1:36:01 Brennan: One, two, three… You take 22 points of damage. [health bar whirring]

1:36:15 Zac: From that guy?

1:36:15 Brennan: From Becky.

1:36:15 Zac: Oh.

1:36:19 Ally: What are you at?

1:36:20 Brennan: Becky looks at you.

1:36:21 Emily: 8. [nervously laughs]

1:36:22 Brennan: Yeah, Becky looks at you and goes,

1:36:24 Becky: Um, you can not come in here! This is trespassing, we're making a hive! [whooshing] [splashing]

1:36:32 Brennan: Sucks the water out of your body again.

1:36:33 Sofia: Oh, thank you. [laughing] I look so good.

1:36:37 Ally: Good, God damn it. It's like.

1:36:46 Brennan: And then Becky backs over to this corner. That's going to be Kingston.

1:36:52 Lou: Kingston, uh, okay. Wow, wow, wow, there's a lot going on.

1:36:56 Ally: Yeah, yeah.

1:36:57 Lou: Me and Misty are trapped by bugs. Everybody's about to have to fight that big bug. I guess I'll cast Sacred Flame on the bug next to me.

1:37:09 Brennan: Okay.

1:37:10 Lou: So it has to make a Dexterity saving throw.

1:37:13 Brennan: It fails.

1:37:14 Lou: Fantastic, I'll roll 2d8. 6 and 7, 13. [whooshing] [flames blazing]

1:37:23 Brennan: You light this thing up, it is toast.

1:37:26 Lou: All right, great, and then can I move just down this way?

1:37:29 Brennan: Yeah, just take six squares of movement.

1:37:31 Lou: One, two, three, four, five, six, there we go.

1:37:34 Brennan: Hell yeah, that's gonna be Pete.

1:37:38 Ally: What is Dash again, if I take a Dash action?

1:37:40 Brennan: It just means you're using your action to move twice as far as normal.

1:37:43 Ally: Oh okay, I'll do that to get as further as I can.

1:37:45 Brennan: Cool, so you're gonna go like--

1:37:46 Ally: If I'm floating, does it add anything extra to my?

1:37:49 Brennan: You don't need to make an Acrobatics check to get through the hole.

1:37:50 Ally: Cool, yeah, I'll do that.

1:37:51 Brennan: Cool, so this is gonna be five, ten, fifteen, twenty, twenty-five, thirty, thirty-five, fourty, fourty-five, fifty. Yeah, you make it. You're floating here, above the cockroach in the kitchen with Misty. That's your full turn, that's your movement. Unless you have a bonus action, that's your movement and your action.

1:38:15 Ally: I don't have a bonus action, so uh, yeah.

1:38:19 Brennan: Hell yeah, cool. That is going to be the bugsters. This dude rushes through, boom, through the bathrooms. He's gonna go one, two, three, four, five. He's gonna take some swings at you, Pete, flying up there near the roof.

1:38:40 Ally: Cool.

1:38:41 Brennan: That's a miss. That's a hit.

1:38:44 Ally: Can I cast Shield again, for 5 plus AC?

1:38:47 Brennan: Yes, you can.

1:38:48 Ally: Then I would be up to 18.

1:38:49 Brennan: Okay, unfortunately, bypassed the Shield. He got higher than an 18.

1:38:52 Emily: Wild Magic roll.

1:38:55 Ally: Hm?

1:38:55 Emily: Wild Magic.

1:38:56 Ally: Oh, yeah.

1:38:57 Brennan: I'm gonna need you to make a Constitution saving throw.

1:38:59 Ally: Oh, okay, cool. 7, I'll use my Bardic.

1:39:04 Lou: And your Bless.

1:39:05 Ally: Another 7, so that’s 14, and a 3, so 17. And then what do I add, oh?

1:39:10 Brennan: You see that this bugster goes,

1:39:12 Bugster: I've been getting really into biting people recently. [growling] [chittering]

1:39:16 Brennan: And latches on, deals you 6 points of damage. [health bar whirring]

1:39:19 Ally: Okay.

1:39:20 Brennan: What are you at right now?

1:39:21 Ally: Now I'm down to 13.

1:39:23 Brennan: That is bugster's turn. Let me look if there's any more bugsters left out there.

1:39:26 Ally: Thank you for the Bardic.

1:39:28 Brennan: That's now going to be Misty.

1:39:33 Siobhan: Um, hm. I'm gonna just risk an attack of opportunity from these little buggy guys and come 'round where--

1:39:43 Brennan: Where Kingston is?

1:39:46 Siobhan: Where Kingston is, and I would like to cast Phantasmal Force in front of this hole.

1:39:54 Brennan: Oh, awesome.

1:39:55 Siobhan: And I would like to cast it in the form of the building inspector, and the building inspector is like,

1:40:01 Building Inspector: No, no, buddy, there's asbestos in here. Absolutely can't come in here.

1:40:05 Brennan: Hell yeah, does he make a Wisdom save or something like that?

1:40:07 Siobhan: It's an Intelligence save.

1:40:08 Brennan: Ooh, he's not very intelligent.

1:40:12 Siobhan: And if it's a human-shaped target, a phantasm created to appear as a creature can attack the target for 1d6 of psychic damage, as well.

1:40:22 Brennan: This beetle rolled a 2, which gives him a negative 2 as his final roll.

1:40:27 Siobhan: Oh, he's real dumb.

1:40:28 Brennan: He's real dumb. Again, every person, every phantasmal thing you make, always looks like a costumed version of it, so there's a beautiful building inspector. Like, young woman, [mystical shimmering] got a shining smile, little official thing, a little white hardhat, goes like,

1:40:42 Building Inspector: Sir, you absolutely can't be renovating in here! You haven't gotten the proper [yelling] clearances!

1:40:48 Brennan: Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba! Go ahead and roll damage.

1:40:49 Siobhan: 5.

1:40:51 Emily: Ooh!

1:40:52 Brennan: You see that the beetle goes like,

1:40:54 Beetle: Ah, I'm sorry, I thought we had everything checked out. You know, I got these guys on retainer. My crew, they wanna work, argh!

1:41:02 Brennan: And you see, incredible, Ricky, it's gonna be you.

1:41:07 Zac: I'm just gonna run forward as far as I can go.

1:41:10 Brennan: Fuck yeah, dude.

1:41:11 Zac: So I'll take, can I do...

1:41:13 Brennan: So that's five, ten, fifteen, twenty, twenty-five, thirty. You can get thirty here. Go ahead and make an Athletics check.

1:41:20 Zac: Yeah. Uh, that's, yeah.

1:41:22 Brennan: Hell yeah.

1:41:22 Zac: 20.

1:41:24 Brennan: So that's forty, forty-five.

1:41:27 Zac: I'm gonna go through the left.

1:41:29 Brennan: Okay.

1:41:29 Zac: Well.

1:41:31 Ally: Hm. What's your health?

1:41:33 Zac: I'm pretty good right now, but I'm wondering if--

1:41:35 Brennan: Make one last Athletics check for me.

1:41:38 Zac: Ooh, that one's only a 9.

1:41:39 Brennan: Okay, you do not clear this fine. There's some webbing here you gotta like, slash away at a little bit.

1:41:45 Zac: Cool.

1:41:46 Brennan: But you make it all the way there.

1:41:48 Zac: Probably should have healed y'all.

1:41:51 Ally: Should have what?

1:41:53 Zac: Healed you all.

1:41:54 Brennan: The beetle leaves this entrance and begins to stalk down and try to pummel through this way. Let's see if it can even make its way through the shelves. Oh, that's a nat 1.

1:42:07 Murph: Hah.

1:42:10 Brennan: You hear the beetle be like,

1:42:11 Beetle: All right, all right, listen. I'll find another way through.

1:42:14 Brennan: And you hear a voice say,

1:42:16 La Gran Gata: You will find no other way through there. My number one job is to make sure that the little roaches don't eat the Oreos and Kit Kats on the shelves. [intense growling]

1:42:30 Brennan: And you hear the beetle go,

1:42:30 Beetle: Ah, ah, ah!

1:42:33 Brennan: As La Gran Gata does something horrifying to this beetle in the other room. Emily claps.

1:42:38 Ally: Yeah.

1:42:38 Emily: Go, baby.

1:42:41 Brennan: That's going to be, then it's Pete. Oh, it's Ricky, Beetle, Kugrash, that's you, baby.

1:42:49 Murph: Sweet, I'm in this pathetic little duel with this little guy. [laughing] I'm just gonna say,

1:42:53 Kugrash: Yeah, fuck you, buddy.

1:42:54 Murph: And I spit on him and I'm just gonna run away from him, I get as far as I can get.

1:43:01 Brennan: You spit on a roach.

1:43:02 Ally: Fuck you, buddy.

1:43:02 Brennan: So this is an attack of opportunity.

1:43:04 Murph: Oh, great.

1:43:05 Brennan: So you're gonna go five, ten, fifteen, twenty, twenty-five.

1:43:07 Murph: That's as far as I can get. Oh, you know what, here's what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna use my full action to do a Dash action to try to get through the hole.

1:43:17 Brennan: Yep.

1:43:18 Murph: Um, cool, cool.

1:43:20 Brennan: Just go ahead and give me Athletics or Acrobatics to make it through the hole.

1:43:22 Murph: Oh God. Uh, Acrobatics 18.

1:43:27 Ally: Acrobatics.

1:43:29 Brennan: Hell yeah, you scurry your little rat ass all the way up here by the pizza parlor.

1:43:32 Murph: Hell yeah.

1:43:34 Zac: Are people in your aura now, are they?

1:43:38 Murph: So now I wanna use a bonus action to, I can move the aura 60 feet.

1:43:45 Ally: Fuck yeah.

1:43:46 Murph: So I wanna move it in the middle of the room. About there.

1:43:51 Brennan: Great, put it in the middle of the room. These two roaches are coming for Sofia. One of them hits. I'm gonna need you to make a Constitution saving throw.

1:44:00 Emily: It's gonna be 18.

1:44:04 Brennan: 18, no poison damage. You take 6 points of piercing damage. [health bar whirring] [whistling] Sofia, that's you.

1:44:09 Emily: Okay, I am actually--

1:44:11 Ally: There's a door right there, Sofia.

1:44:12 Emily: Yeah, I'm gonna burst through this. I'm gonna cast Patient Defense. I'm gonna use it, or [laughs] cast, who am I? I'm gonna use a Ki point for Patient Defense, so I will be able to use a Dodge action, and I just wanna jump through here and go after her.

1:44:34 Brennan: Gotcha, cool, cool. Give me an Acrobatics to move through enemy space.

1:44:37 Emily: Okay. That is 21.

1:44:45 Brennan: Hell yeah, you easily clear the movement. You're on the bar here. I'm gonna roll some attacks against you. They got disadvantage, though.

1:44:53 Emily: Wait, but I have Dodge.

1:44:55 Brennan: Dodge is not disengage.

1:44:58 Emily: I thought Dodge was--

1:45:00 Brennan: Dodge is everyone has disadvantage to try to hit you for a turn.

1:45:02 Emily: Oh, okay, sure, yeah, I'll do that.

1:45:04 Brennan: Cool, all of them miss.

1:45:07 Emily: Yeah!

1:45:08 Brennan: Yeah, you have plenty of movement left, you jump--

1:45:10 Emily: And then I wanna go for her.

1:45:11 Brennan: You see that she's just standing in the corner. She's like getting the spell energy ready. She goes,

1:45:16 Becky: Come on, we've been fictional for so long. We get to be real today. Won't you let us be real?

1:45:25 Sofia: That is so heart-breaking, but you can't take other peoples' reality away to be real. [chittering]

1:45:33 Emily: And then I fuckin' attack her! Does a, okay, I'm assuming that a 25 hits.

1:45:42 Brennan: 25 hits.

1:45:43 Emily: And then does a 20 hit?

1:45:46 Brennan: 20 does not hit.

1:45:48 Emily: Ugh, okay, well, I'll hit her once at least.

1:45:50 Ally: Jesus Christ.

1:45:51 Emily: Hit her for 9 and then I'm gonna use my left hook.

1:45:55 Zac: Oh, I think she's...

1:45:56 Ally: I think she's dead.

1:45:57 Brennan: Emily, I'm gonna stop you right here. [dramatic music] You run across, you gear up, phew, you're like, "Here it comes." You get ready for this whole fuckin' combo move bicycle kick, you see that she gets the spell energy ready, [magical buzzing] and you swing out and you see, you hear a voice in the back of your head again, once again say,

1:46:18 Voice: Hey, kid, knock 'em dead. [tense music, subway horn honking]

1:46:22 Brennan: Whomp, the fist on your golden ring glows bright, flames streak off of your fist, and you obliterate this bug lady's fuckin' head. [whooshing]

1:46:35 Ally: Fuck yeah.

1:46:36 Zac: I'm looking through the hole and I'm just like,

1:46:37 Ricky: Awesome. [laughing]

1:46:39 Emily: But I'm so drunk that I don't know that I did it, so I hit her dead body for another 8. [squishing] [triumphant music]

1:46:45 Brennan: You see a kind of gruesome sight of just Sofia pummeling this dead body. You see that the bugs all begin to… The bugs start to turn, like, what were giant cockroaches become like, cockroaches, beetles, [crackling] and now a rhino beetle, then some other thing. They become like chimeric and changing, and they just float up [magical whooshing] and you just see that the Umbral Arcana begins to return and the rent area begins to leave. The beetle is totally gone in the other room. The bugsters, the roaches, all of them vanish and disappear.

1:47:19 Siobhan: Phew, what about the people who are gummed up? Can we free them, or have they freed themselves?

1:47:26 Brennan: You can go and start freeing them. All of them remember what they saw.

1:47:31 Ally: Great.

1:47:32 Brennan: So they start going like,

1:47:32 Bystander: What happened here? There were bad bug people. Is this a flash mob?

1:47:38 Kingston: Yeah, it's a flash mob of sorts.

1:47:40 Misty: Yeah, Improv Everywhere, you heard of them? They're great guys.

1:47:44 Brennan: You see that one of them goes in and you see that the Umbral Arcana starts to like seep back in, and you can tell that he kind of doesn't believe it, but he goes like,

1:47:52 Bystander: Yeah, yeah, those guys are crazy.

1:47:57 Kingston: Aren't they practical jokesters? [laughing] On truTV, yeah.

1:48:00 Misty: I love that show.

1:48:02 Kingston: This is an episode of Pranked. It's those four, bunch of guys.

1:48:04 Misty: It's a brand new viral campaign.

1:48:06 Bystander: I love jokes, I love truTV. I love especially [looks directly into the camera] Adam Ruins Everything.

1:48:11 Emily: Yeah.

1:48:11 Lou: What a show.

1:48:12 Brennan: What a show.

1:48:12 Ally: What a show, baby.

1:48:14 Brennan: Tune in.You see that they sort of wander out, but you can tell they remember, somewhere they remember.

1:48:26 Emily: If I see any of them, I wanna be like,

1:48:29 Sofia: Look, I just found out magic is real, too. It's a real fuckin' dick to the face, if you know what I mean.

1:48:35 Siobhan: A dick to the face.

1:48:35 Ally: To the face?

1:48:37 Brennan: Where do you guys gather as the battle--

1:48:40 Zac: Probably in the bodega.

1:48:41 Kugrash: Yeah, why don't we go to that cool bodega. What's that ring? What's that ring,        Sofia?

1:48:44 Ally: Yeah, it sounds like there was swords and stuff, right?

1:48:46 Siobhan: Yeah, what's up with this mirror that I pocketed?

1:48:49 Brennan: You guys leave. You guys see that, as you guys go back, you see that La Gran Gata is there waiting for you in the bodega, going— [purring]

1:48:57 Sofia: La Gran Gata, I pledge myself to you.

1:49:02 La Gran Gata: You pledge yourself to me?

1:49:04 Sofia: Yeah, do you take pledges?

1:49:06 La Gran Gata: I have not in the past, but...

1:49:08 Sofia: Well, you got one now.

1:49:09 La Gran Gata: Mm, your service is honorable. Can I jump up into your arms and you do chin scratchies?

1:49:18 Sofia: [about to cry] Oh my God, yes.

1:49:20 Brennan: You see, vroom, the cat jumps up, snuggles into your shoulder, and goes,

1:49:23 La Gran Gata: You are a valiant servant. And I like to nuzzle your shirt. You don't mind if I just rub my hairs on it?

1:49:33 Sofia: La Gran Gato, Gata, you can do whatever you want.

1:49:37 Misty: [whispering] She's gonna fuck that cat.

1:49:39 Kugrash: She is insanely drunk.

1:49:39 Pete: She is gonna fuck that cat.

1:49:43 Brennan: Yeah, you guys are in the bodega. It's covered in treasures. La Gran Gata looks over, however, and says,

1:49:51 La Gran Gata: [sniffing] Something is missing from the shelves of the bodega.

1:49:56 Sofia: Oh, you gave me the ring.

1:49:57 Misty: Yeah, you gave me this mirror.

1:49:59 La Gran Gata: No, something else. [gasping]

1:50:02 Misty: Oh no.

1:50:03 Pete: Fuck.

1:50:04 Sofia: Oh no, did the cockroach take something?

1:50:06 Brennan: You look up and you guys see a shattered piece of glass on the back that was like a display case, an ornate display case, and underneath it, it says, written in gold, "The Key to the City."

1:50:22 Pete: In a bodega?

1:50:24 Sofia: Do you think--

1:50:24 La Gran Gata: And what is wrong with a bodega?

1:50:26 Pete: No, nothing, no, truly nothing, it just--

1:50:28 La Gran Gata: These stores are the pillars of communities.

1:50:31 Pete: Totally, I get all my meals—

1:50:33 La Gran Gata: You can get a bacon, egg, and cheese and a coffee for like $2.50.

1:50:36 Zac: I Create Water on the small burning parts of it. [flames sizzling]

1:50:41 Brennan: You start to put out the fires.

1:50:42 Ricky: Just being careful, just gotta be careful.

1:50:45 Brennan: You see that the cat's eyes are this beautiful, again, heterochromia of like a blue and green eye.

1:50:51 Sofia: You're really magic. Can I ask you a very selfish favor?

1:50:55 La Gran Gata: Ask away.

1:50:56 Sofia: I want two different color eyes like you. Is that a magic capability?

1:51:00 Misty: That's what you're gonna ask? You drunk bitch.

1:51:04 Brennan: You see that the cat smiles, reaches up, and says,

1:51:07 La Gran Gata: To administer this most powerful of magic, I need to lick your nose.

1:51:15 Sofia: Lick away.

1:51:16 La Gran Gata: The texture of my tongue is very sandpapery. Are you sure it will not discomfort you?

1:51:22 Sofia: No, anything to get those two different color eyes.

1:51:25 La Gran Gata: [licking] [purring]

1:51:28 Pete: She's fucking, she's really making out with that cat.

1:51:30 Brennan: Now, you see, your eyes are two different colors. You have one brilliant blue and one bright green eye.

1:51:35 Emily: Oh my God, I'm Bowie.

1:51:37 Kingston: Hey, I'm sorry, cat. Did you say that the key to the city is gone?

1:51:43 La Gran Gata: Many treasures are held here at the bodega. Ancient wonders of worlds beyond dreaming. We also have Ho Hos and the entire line of Hostess cake products.

1:51:54 Kingston: Fantastic.

1:51:55 Zac: Can I cast Locate Object?

1:51:59 Brennan: You can.

1:52:01 Ally: Whoa.

1:52:03 Brennan: Ricky, you feel the key [ominous music] moving quickly away, across the bridge to Manhattan.

1:52:14 Emily: It can't be any of these guys because they disappeared.

1:52:17 La Gran Gata: You have much work ahead and I need to take a nap. I'm a very sleepy cat. Good luck, adventurers.

1:52:27 Brennan: And that's where we're gonna stop on this episode of The Unsleeping City. [NEXT EPISODE - Episode 7: We Need to Talk About Pete] [NEXT TIME ON DIMENSION 20] [logo glitching] [dramatic music]

1:52:32 Kingston: Hey, what the fuck is going on?

1:52:33 Kugrash: What was that, what was that?

1:52:34 Alejandro: Real peoples' lives are at stake.

1:52:36 Pete: It's okay, okay.

1:52:36 Liz: You tellin' me you were a faithful voice to the city?

1:52:39 Kingston: I am faithful, I was faithful, I would have continued to be faithful.

1:52:44 Murph: Nat 20.

1:52:48 Jackson: [striking a martial arts pose] Come on, toots.

1:52:50 Sofia: Okay.

1:52:51 Brennan: The most beautiful dalmatian in the world starts running.

1:52:53 Ally: Yes!

1:52:55 Ox: Arf, arf, arf.

1:52:56 Kingston: You're asking me to choose between New York City or Pete? I choose New York City.

1:52:56 Edited by: gluegunshots, Tillie the Paladin, rowan solsys