The Last Stand

0:00:19 Fantasy High: Junior Year Emily Axford as Fig Faeth; Zac Oyama as Gorgug Thistlespring; Siobhan Thompson as Adaine Abernant; Lou Wilson as Fabian Seacaster; Ally Beardsley as Kristen Applebees; and Brian “Murph” Murphy as Riz Gukgak Episode 15: The Last Stand < [Previous Episode] | [Next Episode] >

0:00:34 Content Warnings: academic stress, murder of a minor [Intro Theme]

0:00:49 Brennan: Hello, one and all! Welcome back to another thrilling episode of "Dimension 20: Fantasy High Junior Year". I'm your humble dungeon master, Brennan Lee Mulligan. With me, as always, are our Intrepid Heroes. Say hi, Intrepid Heroes!

0:00:56 All: Hi, Intrepid Heroes!

0:00:59 Brennan: Last we left off, the fiendish cleric teacher Bobby Dawn—

0:01:06 Emily: [eyes narrowed] [suspiciously] Fiendish?

0:01:06 Zac: [eyebrows raised] [mildly] Fiendish?

0:01:09 Brennan: Yeah, I guess not fiendish.

0:01:09 Ally: We cut to the final episode.

0:01:13 Brennan: I mean to say—

0:01:13 Siobhan: You got me.

0:01:14 Brennan: Actually, we have fiends at the table.

0:01:16 Emily: Yeah, okay.

0:01:17 Brennan: The foul and loathsome Bobby Dawn, with Kristen's—

0:01:20 Murph: [hammily] We got a couple loathsome ones over here, too.

0:01:24 Ally: Hey, nat 20!

0:01:26 Emily: [pointing at Murph] I'm looking at foul. [pointing at Zac] I'm looking at loathsome.

0:01:29 Zac: Hey.

0:01:31 Brennan: Had given Kristen, after an A+ effort, an F.

0:01:36 Ally: Unbelievable.

0:01:36 Brennan: This injustice will not stand.

0:01:39 Murph: Absolutely unbelievable.

0:01:40 Brennan: We had Gorgug achieving the grand sort of unison of his artificer and barbarian classes, but leaving the Aguefort Owlbears. We had Riz Gukgak stepping up to join the Owlbears, and discovering the name and, more importantly, life/death status of the rogue teacher, Eugenia Shadow, maybe even tracking down a cemetery location. And we also had the creation of a great working of metal upon the face of the cosmos, "Dawn of Justice", moving the divine yet infernal realm of Ankarna into the bottom of the Bottomless Pit with the summoning of a fearsome Daymare. Seeing that their grades were in terrible jeopardy, our Bad Kids leapt to action, consulting Jawbone, who got them set up for the Last Standard Examination, AKA the Last Stand, a coliseum cage match where an army of cheering Arthur Agueforts hoots and hollers at your upcoming success as your proctor, Gavin Pundle, sits atop this structure in the middle of the coliseum as monsters attempt to kill him and all of you, and the goal here being to last as long as you possibly can against an impossible to defeat array of monsters emerging from these gates as Buddy Dawn waits in the sidelines to resurrect you when your Last Stand is concluded. And let us not forget, plenty more academic questions where that came from. [players groaning]

0:03:17 Brennan: We return into combat in the middle of Kristen Applebees' turn. Kristen, you have just vaporized a number of skeletal warriors. You have a bonus action and your movement.

0:03:31 Ally: Incredible, I will go to my desk and I will pull out a test.

0:03:36 Brennan: Great, your desk, over back here. You rush over to your desk. Kristen, you run over to your desk and see that there are two folders within it, one marked Medicine, the other marked Religion.

0:03:52 Ally: Let's do Religion.

0:03:52 Zac: Here we go.

0:03:54 Brennan: Here we go. Everyone get ready.

0:03:57 Lou: There it is. Stamp.

0:03:58 Brennan: And as a reminder, Gorgug has two uses of the pass stamp with those academic resources. Zac pretends to stamp his teeth.

0:04:05 Brennan: This is a one minute test. Three, two, one.

0:04:13 Ally: “Which rad Dwarven deity holds dominion over the art of Shredding? Orrie, Ollie, Ormry, Oggie?” Ollie, right? That would make sense.

0:04:22 Murph: It should be Ollie.

0:04:22 Brennan: Correct!

0:04:24 Lou: There it is.

0:04:24 Siobhan: Wow.

0:04:24 Brennan: There we go, bam.

0:04:26 Siobhan: Hey, we might not even need those two passes.

0:04:29 Lou: We're just on fire, academically.

0:04:31 Brennan: Mr. Thistlespring.

0:04:32 Lou: Stamp that shit!

0:04:32 Ally: Stamp that shit!

0:04:34 Brennan: Stamp that shit. [players cheering]

0:04:40 Brennan: Hell yes. Of course, your campaign associate and member of the LGBT Student Alliance, Torek Railgrinder, a cleric of Ollie, the rad god of shredding.

0:04:48 Emily: Oh, I just assumed it was 'cause it was a skateboarding term.

0:04:50 Brennan: It is 'cause of the skateboarding term.

0:04:51 Ally: Yeah.

0:04:51 Brennan: It's actually a pun, because Aulë is Tolkein's god of the dwarves, and it sounds like Ollie.

0:04:59 Emily: A skateboard "Lord of the Rings" pun. [laughs]

0:05:02 Ally: That was for you. [points at the camera]

0:05:03 Brennan: [points at the camera] That was for you, watching this at home. Specifically for you. Kristen, any bonus actions?

0:05:07 Ally: No, not at this moment.

0:05:08 Emily: If you don't have a bonus action, maybe you could grab from my desk as well.

0:05:13 Ally: Will you allow it?

0:05:13 Brennan: Give me a Sleight of Hand check. We'll call it DC 10 Sleight of Hand.

0:05:16 Emily: Oh no.

0:05:18 Murph: It's okay, you just need a 13. l: There it is. Clean.

0:05:21 Ally: 17.

0:05:21 Brennan: 17, great. Cool. You're able to run over and grab Fig's.

0:05:26 Zac: This feels like "Supermarket Sweep".

0:05:28 Siobhan: Yes.

0:05:28 Ally: Yeah.

0:05:29 Brennan: You see two in Fig's, which are Performance and Driver's Ed.

0:05:33 Kristen: Performance and driver's ed? Which classes have you been going to?

0:05:38 Fig: Neither. Let's start with Performance.

0:05:40 Ally: Performance! Okay, I grab it.

0:05:42 Brennan: Okay, Performance. I'm gonna hand this to Emily. This is a three minute challenge.

0:05:49 Emily: Okay, if it's write a song, we're all doing it together, 'cause that's very fun. “Please compose a limerick, sonnet, or haiku expressing your feelings and emotions relating to the exam you are currently taking.”

0:06:02 Ally: Murph!

0:06:04 Murph: What? Let's not fail. Let's not fail.

0:06:07 Siobhan: There was an exam that was hard. But luckily, we had a bard.

0:06:09 Emily: But luckily, I am a bard! The demons are slayed, 'cause of how we played.

0:06:17 Siobhan: They're hoisted by their own petard!

0:06:17 Emily: ...own petard!

0:06:20 Brennan: Correct!

0:06:20 Ally: Yes!

0:06:23 Brennan: Unbelievable.

0:06:23 Ally: So good.

0:06:25 Brennan: Here you go, Mr. Thistlespring, if you'll please pass that 100%. Zac pretends to don a monocle and inspects the paper before stamping it. He holds the paper up to the camera and nods.

0:06:31 Siobhan: Woo!

0:06:31 Brennan: Unbelievable. Okay, we move on. The first monster turn of the combat.

0:06:39 Lou: Oh wow.

0:06:39 Brennan: [mock ominously] The ochre jellies go.

0:06:41 Emily: Okay.

0:06:41 Siobhan: [laughs] They're so far away.

0:06:43 Brennan: They have a movement speed of 10, and will use their action to move another 10.

0:06:49 Ally: Horrifying! Horrifying!

0:06:51 Emily: Oh no! They're charging, they're charging!

0:06:53 Fabian: Kristen, quick, walk away.

0:06:55 Ally: Riz, like, screams so loud.

0:06:55 Riz: Kristen!

0:06:57 Siobhan: Stand on your desk. They can't get you.

0:06:59 Brennan: Adaine Abernant, that is your turn.

0:07:01 Siobhan: I'll take a test, please.

0:07:02 Brennan: Elven and Arcana.

0:07:05 Siobhan: Ay yi yi. I'll go Elven.

0:07:07 Zac: Elven and the Chipmunks.

0:07:07 Siobhan: Yeah.

0:07:09 Lou: Elven!

0:07:11 Brennan: This is a one minute examination. Furthermore, this is the first examination with an extra credit component.

0:07:19 Siobhan: Okay.

0:07:19 Emily: Oh!

0:07:20 Brennan: Three, two, one.

0:07:23 Siobhan: Okay, “please translate the following phrase into Common. Pedo Mellon a Minno.” Mellon is friends, and then extra credit, “the word Mellon is the root word for which extremely weak form of magic?”

0:07:35 Lou: Friendship? Is friendship magic?

0:07:37 Murph: Cantrip?

0:07:37 Siobhan: Magic—

0:07:38 Emily: “Mellon is the root word for a weak form of magic.”

0:07:42 Murph: Cantrip, maybe?

0:07:42 Ally: Melee?

0:07:44 Zac: Pedo Mellon a Minno.

0:07:44 Emily: Wait, what is friends?

0:07:47 Siobhan: Mellon is, "Speak friends and enter," in "Lord of the Rings".

0:07:50 Emily: Okay.

0:07:52 Siobhan: And we're not allowed to use rolls on this?

0:07:54 Brennan: Nope.

0:07:54 Emily: Pedo Mellon?

0:07:55 Zac: P-E-D-O, is that like walking or something?

0:07:59 Ally: Could be.

0:07:59 Zac: Maybe pedestrian?

0:08:00 Emily: Or child.

0:08:00 Zac: Or child.

0:08:01 Emily: Child, yeah, that's what I was thinking.

0:08:03 Murph: Animal friendship?

0:08:03 Ally: Something about Bad Kids?

0:08:05 Emily: Oh!

0:08:05 Ally: Pedo Mellon a Minno?

0:08:05 Brennan: I will say—

0:08:05 Emily: Oh, little—

0:08:07 Ally: Mellon is friends.

0:08:07 Siobhan: I've already said it?

0:08:09 Brennan: You've already said it.

0:08:09 Ally: Oh!

0:08:10 Siobhan: Speak friend and enter.

0:08:10 Brennan: That is it. Correct, speak friend and enter. And extra credit, with a few seconds left?

0:08:17 Siobhan: The spell Friends?

0:08:17 Zac: Friends?

0:08:18 Siobhan: Yes.

0:08:18 Lou: Friendship?

0:08:19 Brennan: What'd you say?

0:08:19 Emily: Oh.

0:08:20 Lou: Friendship.

0:08:20 Brennan: That is correct! Extra credit answered.

0:08:24 Lou: Friendship. I think in the first—

0:08:25 Siobhan: Oh, in the first thing, you said friendship—

0:08:27 Lou: The very first episode.

0:08:27 Siobhan: And then—

0:08:28 Brennan: Aguefort got extremely mad when you said that friendship was the most powerful magic of all. That is 100% pass, having answered the extra.

0:08:35 Ally: Two passes, two passes. You got extra credit.

0:08:38 Brennan: Extra credit, yes. Deeply stressful. Yes, the phrase… First of all, I cannot believe that you just stone cold know mellon is the Elven word for friend.

0:08:47 Siobhan: Yes, of course I know, because I've read "The Lord of the Rings" maybe 3,000 times.

0:08:54 Brennan: So yes, the translation is, "Speak friend and enter." The extra credit, you see the moment you answer the extra credit, Fabian yells friendship as the weakest form of magic. I'm going to roll a d4 in front of the board. That is a two. Everybody may regain either a 2nd level or 1st level spell slot, whatever you have available.

0:09:14 Ally: Ooh!

0:09:14 Siobhan: Great.

0:09:15 Brennan: As magic erupts out from the coliseum. Adaine, that's just the beginning of your turn.

0:09:20 Siobhan: Okay, who we got left over here?

0:09:23 Emily: Just this guy, maybe, and these two guys.

0:09:25 Brennan: And the ochre jellies over there.

0:09:27 Zac: And the mimic.

0:09:27 Siobhan: And the mimic. I actually might attack the mimic.

0:09:30 Emily: Oh!

0:09:31 Ally: 'Cause it got your Mirror Image out.

0:09:33 Zac: There's also one more thing in it now? Or does Fabian have both?

0:09:36 Lou: There's one more thing in it.

0:09:37 Siobhan: There's one more thing in it.

0:09:38 Lou: I could take 14 more points of damage.

0:09:39 Siobhan: I will do a 3rd level Chromatic Orb on it.

0:09:42 Brennan: On the mimic. Go ahead and give me your attack roll.

0:09:44 Siobhan: Great, and we're Blessed still, right?

0:09:46 Brennan: Mm-hmm.

0:09:46 Siobhan: Great. [groans] Does a 15 hit?

0:09:51 Brennan: 15 hits.

0:09:51 Siobhan: Thank god.

0:09:53 Lou: On a two on the die!

0:09:53 Siobhan: Two on the die.

0:09:55 Brennan: How about it?

0:09:55 Emily: Wow.

0:09:57 Brennan: Wow!

0:09:57 Ally: Wow.

0:10:01 Zac: Must be nice.

0:10:01 Emily: Must be nice, 'cause I got a three. [dice rolling]

0:10:04 Siobhan: Okay, nice. Okay, 14, 24, 26 damage.

0:10:09 Brennan: What energy are you using?

0:10:10 Siobhan: What energy am I using? I'll go thunder.

0:10:14 Brennan: Boom! A giant sonic blast hits the mimic [screeches] as it screams and reels back. Any bonus actions from Adaine? And also remember that your summons will act as well.

0:10:25 Siobhan: Great, can I have bonus action True Strike?

0:10:28 Brennan: Yeah, yeah.

0:10:28 Siobhan: I forgot to do that.I don't crit, and that gives me the Dodge action.

0:10:33 Brennan: Cool.

0:10:34 Siobhan: And then I will have this dust mephit right here, I will have it do Blinding Breath against that mephit. So it's a DC 10 Dex check or be blinded for a minute.

0:10:44 Brennan: Against the gorgon?

0:10:44 Siobhan: Against the gorgon, yeah.

0:10:46 Brennan: Gotcha.

0:10:46 Lou: Against the gorgon.

0:10:47 Brennan: The gorgon does not make the Dexterity saving throw.

0:10:51 Siobhan: Stunning, so it's now blinded for a minute. It can repeat the saving throw at the end of each of its turns.

0:10:54 Brennan: Incredible. So the mephit blows sand into the gorgon's eyes. You have two other mephits that can act.

0:11:02 Siobhan: I'm actually gonna move this one over to here.

0:11:05 Brennan: Okay.

0:11:07 Siobhan: And, I don't know, can I have this one give Fabian the Help action?

0:11:10 Brennan: Sure.

0:11:12 Siobhan: Have this one give Riz the Help action?

0:11:14 Brennan: Have them move next to the character in order to do so.

0:11:16 Siobhan: Oh, okay. Great, yeah, I'll do that.

0:11:19 Brennan: Cool, so Fabian and Riz, you feel these mephits come in to sort of help aim your strikes. Murph nods.

0:11:26 Lou: Mm, thank you.

0:11:28 Brennan: Adaine, that is your turn. After you, the gorgon is going to spend—

0:11:34 Emily: Finally. He's in my Spirit Guardians, so he has to do a Wisdom save.

0:11:39 Brennan: Okay. Four on the die, he does not make it.

0:11:42 Emily: Okay, he takes 26 damage, and his speed is halved.

0:11:46 Ally: Yes! And he has to use—

0:11:47 Zac: And he took half his movement to get up?

0:11:49 Brennan: So wait a minute, let me see this here. His speed becomes 20 feet. He's got to spend 10 of that 20 to stand up, can no longer use his Trampling Charge—

0:12:02 Siobhan: And is blind.

0:12:03 Zac: I was worried this guy was gonna—

0:12:05 Ally: Yeah.

0:12:05 Brennan: Okay.

0:12:06 Zac: ...bully me.

0:12:06 Ally: “Bully me”? [laughs]

0:12:08 Siobhan: Oh wait, can I do one more thing on my turn? Just real quick, can I do an Insight check on these chains, or Perception or something?

0:12:15 Brennan: Yeah, give me a Perception check.

0:12:17 Siobhan: 24.

0:12:18 Brennan: They are made of a non-ferrous metal. They are made of bronze.

0:12:24 Zac: Ferrous?

0:12:24 Siobhan: What does that mean?

0:12:25 Ally: That will come into play, I'm sure.

0:12:27 Zac: Okay.

0:12:28 Emily: Non-ferrous would be like fey, right? Is there something invisible in them?

0:12:32 Siobhan: Oh shit.

0:12:33 Emily: I wonder. Or maybe that's not—

0:12:34 Zac: But he's blind, too.

0:12:34 Brennan: He's blind. He's gonna go here. Getting disadvantage on all of his attacks, the gorgon is instead… How much is this? This is a 60 foot radius.

0:12:48 Zac: [quietly] Don't do it.

0:12:48 Brennan: Don't do it, man.

0:12:50 Lou: [quietly] Please don't do it.

0:12:50 Brennan: Please don't do it.

0:12:52 Zac: [even more quietly] I don't know if you can hear me, but don't do it.

0:12:54 Siobhan: [the quietest] Brennan, what the fuck?

0:12:54 Lou: Jesus.

0:12:55 Murph: Does Fig get opportunity?

0:12:57 Emily: No, I don't think I'm in range.

0:12:58 Murph: Oh, got it.

0:12:58 Emily: I'm 10 feet above.

0:13:00 Siobhan: No, not the teacher!

0:13:01 Brennan: Okay, the gorgon is going to go up.

0:13:05 Siobhan: Is that a spell?

0:13:05 Brennan: No.

0:13:07 Siobhan: Oh.

0:13:08 Brennan: I'm going to need a Constitution saving throw from Gorgug and also from Gavin Pundle.

0:13:17 Zac: Okay.

0:13:17 Lou: Gavin!

0:13:18 Ally: Is this a spell or other magical effect?

0:13:22 Brennan: It is not a spell or other magical effect. It is a monstrous ability. We're gonna roll Box of Doom for Gavin Pundle.

0:13:30 Siobhan: What does he add to his Con, and what does he need to get?

0:13:32 Brennan: I won't tell you what he needs to get. I'll let you decide how you feel about what he would possibly roll. Let's find out. Gav, where are you, baby? Okay, here we go.

0:13:39 Lou: Gavvy, baby.

0:13:41 Brennan: Gavvy, baby. He adds a plus one to Constitution.

0:13:43 Lou: Gavvy, baby!

0:13:45 Murph: Do we get the sense that if he dies, but we Revivify him, would that still count as him dying in the fight?

0:13:53 Brennan: It would still count as him dying in the fight.

0:13:54 Murph: Even if we Revivify him? [gestures to Ally/Kristen]

0:13:54 Brennan: If you Revivify him, it will not be as bad as if he stays dead, but there would be different points. You wanna try to keep him from dying as much as possible. So Gorgug, why don't you roll first? Roll your Constitution.

0:14:08 Zac: It's a Con save?

0:14:08 Brennan: Con save.

0:14:12 Zac: Nat one.

0:14:12 Brennan: Okay.

0:14:13 Siobhan: You get a 14. Wait, actually, it won't make any difference, right, if you fail—

0:14:18 Lou: He might take half.

0:14:20 Brennan: But a 14 on the die would still be adding Gorgug's Constitution.

0:14:25 Siobhan: Yeah, then I'll give you a 14.

0:14:27 Zac: Then that becomes a 24.

0:14:29 Brennan: You are about to take a deep breath in. The moment, as the bull is getting up, Adaine has a premonition and is able to shout at you, “cover your nose and mouth”. A billowing cloud of poison green smoke erupts from the gorgon's mouth. This is a petrifying breath that will turn you to stone.

0:14:46 Ally: Nice. Oh my god.

0:14:46 Brennan: Gavin adds a plus one.

0:14:51 Lou: Oh god. Gavvy, baby.

0:14:53 Brennan: 18 plus one is 19. Gavin saves.

0:14:56 Players: Yes!

0:14:56 Lou: Gavvy, baby!

0:14:58 Zac: [to Siobhan] Thank you. [bows slightly]

0:14:58 Brennan: The gorgon... [roars]

0:14:59 Siobhan: [reciprocates bow to Zac] You're welcome. I'm glad for me, too, because you're strong.

0:15:06 Brennan: [roars] As the gorgon covers this place in this poisonous, noxious green smoke, and with that, we are back to the top of the round. That is going to be Riz Gukgak.

0:15:18 Murph: Okay, kick it off, I'll grab my History exam.

0:15:22 Brennan: Here we go.

0:15:22 Lou: Kick it off!

0:15:24 Brennan: This also is a two minute exam. This also has an extra credit component.

0:15:30 Murph: Okay.

0:15:31 Brennan: Three, two, one.

0:15:33 Murph: Okay. “225 immaculate conceptions occurred on the same day in Solace in reaction to the first public performance of which instrument? The octocord, the electric lute, the astral piano, or the hurdy-gurdy?”

0:15:46 Siobhan: I believe it was the electric lute.

0:15:47 Emily: Electric lute is what I—

0:15:47 Lou: What's the extra credit?

0:15:51 Murph: And then the extra credit is, “Nine months later, the newborns were discovered to have been wearing vests in utero. What material were the vests made out of?”

0:15:57 Siobhan: Leather. Right, leather?

0:15:57 Murph: Or diamond or something?

0:16:00 Siobhan: No, I think they were leather.

0:16:00 Emily: A leather vest, like rockers?

0:16:01 Siobhan: I think it was leather, yeah.

0:16:04 Zac: I don't remember at all.

0:16:05 Murph: Okay, so first, we're saying the electric lute?

0:16:08 Ally: Electric lute.

0:16:09 Emily: Electric lute is what I thought.

0:16:11 Brennan: Electric lute is correct!

0:16:12 Emily: Yeah!

0:16:14 Murph: And then we wanna say… Oh, what about denim?

0:16:16 Siobhan: I think it's leather. I have a—

0:16:19 Emily: Denim's kinda good, but— [points to Siobhan]

0:16:19 Siobhan: Denim is my second guess, but I'm pretty sure it's leather.

0:16:23 Emily: This one, I don't remember, so.

0:16:24 Zac: I don't remember.

0:16:26 Murph: No one remembers? Okay, but you feel strongly about—

0:16:28 Siobhan: I feel more strongly for leather than I do denim.

0:16:31 Murph: Leather.

0:16:33 Brennan: Incorrect.

0:16:33 Siobhan: Fuck.

0:16:33 Emily: What was it?

0:16:35 Brennan: It is denim. [players groaning]

0:16:37 Brennan: That is still a pass.

0:16:37 Ally: Stamp that shit!

0:16:39 Brennan: You guys are still flawless. Extra credit is just that, extra credit. Incredible. Riz, that is your turn.

0:16:47 Murph: I'm gonna go after the gorgon, I think. So I'll pop around… Oh, wait, we got these two guys. I feel like other people have things to deal with.

0:16:55 Ally: Yeah, they'll be fine.

0:16:57 Murph: So I'll go up 5, 10, 15, 20. I'll just get line of sight on it up here.

0:17:00 Brennan: Cool.

0:17:02 Murph: And then I'll take a shot at them.

0:17:04 Brennan: You have the Help action, so you will roll with advantage.

0:17:06 Murph: Yay!

0:17:06 Emily: Just so you know, for future attacks, I do look like the proctor.

0:17:09 Brennan: Oh, good call. Gotcha, gotcha, yes, yes.

0:17:11 Ally: Yeah, that's true.

0:17:11 Murph: 25 on the higher one.

0:17:14 Brennan: Yes, that definitely hits. [Lou clicks his tongue in a cool way]

0:17:19 Murph: 43 damage.

0:17:21 Brennan: Riz, describe how you take this gorgon out.

0:17:24 Murph: I think I pop around the corner. I shoot dangerously close to Gorgug's ear.

0:17:32 Zac: Between my legs.

0:17:32 Riz: Watch out! I thought we were going ear! I thought we were going ear! Move your head! Move your head!

0:17:36 Gorgug: Make a choice! [moves his head]

0:17:40 Murph: Blast that dude, and then I will… I actually still have Haste, so I still have another—

0:17:47 Brennan: You see, by the way, alarms up in the stadium going [mimics klaxon blaring] like monsters are about to appear any second.

0:17:54 Murph: Got it. Maybe I'll take a bonus… How much movement have I used so far? Does this—

0:18:01 Brennan: That's a difficult— Yeah.

0:18:03 Murph: 10, 15, 20, okay, so I've already used most of my movement. Oh, we got the mimic here.

0:18:08 Brennan: Mimic, yeah.

0:18:10 Murph: Does it look hurt at all?

0:18:10 Brennan: Yes, Adaine fucked it up.

0:18:14 Lou: Chromatic Orb.

0:18:14 Siobhan: I hit it for like 26.

0:18:15 Murph: Okay, cool. I can take an attack action. I'm not gonna get sneak attack, but I might as well take it. Here's a cheesy question.

0:18:19 Brennan: What's that?

0:18:21 Murph: Based on the wording, with rogue, you get sneak attack every turn, not round.

0:18:27 Brennan: Yes, correct.

0:18:28 Murph: Can I use an action to prepare a reaction to shoot the first dude that comes through here?

0:18:34 Brennan: Murph, you absolutely may. [players cheering]

0:18:37 Brennan: Hell yes, you absolutely may.

0:18:39 Murph: So I'm gonna bonus action hide—

0:18:39 Zac: Smells like cheese. [Siobhan and Ally laugh]

0:18:42 Murph: ...and then prepare an action.

0:18:42 Lou: A rich Swiss.

0:18:44 Brennan: Cool, and that's one of the actions granted by Haste, correct?

0:18:45 Murph: Haste is an extra action.

0:18:48 Brennan: Cool. Amazing.

0:18:48 Murph: I'll hide behind here.

0:18:52 Brennan: Hide behind here? Hell, yeah. Go ahead and give me that Stealth check.

0:18:56 Murph: 24, 'cause Reliable Talent.

0:18:58 Brennan: Reliable Talent. God, Reliable Talent's good. Okay, 24. You hide. Riz is moving so lightning-fucking-fast, this little shadow flitting across the battlefield. Gun ready, you have an action prepared. Fabian, you technically go before the next round of monsters arrive. You can hear them slithering, roaring, and crawling out of the gates right now.

0:19:19 Lou: Got it.

0:19:20 Brennan: You absolutely have the ability to delay your initiative fully until after initiative count 20.

0:19:26 Lou: When they come out.

0:19:26 Brennan: Yeah.

0:19:27 Lou: Yeah, I guess I'll hold. I'll hold for—

0:19:30 Brennan: You do have the mimic.

0:19:32 Lou: There's stuff to do but, you know.

0:19:34 Brennan: I hear you. I hear you.

0:19:35 Lou: Yeah, I'm gonna hold until after they emerge.

0:19:37 Brennan: Cool, I'm gonna reset your initiative to 19. We leave Riz's turn. You have an action prepared. Gavin Pundle goes,

0:19:43 Gavin Pundle: All right, excellent work on that first wave. Second wave emerging now.

0:19:48 Emily: I wink at him as him.

0:19:50 Brennan: He looks up at you and goes,

0:19:50 Gavin Pundle: Do I look like that? “Gavin Pundle” [Fig]: I took some liberties.

0:19:53 Murph: He's so jacked.

0:19:53 Brennan: So fucking jacked. His Oxford buttons, all the top ones are trout-mouthing.

0:20:00 Emily: It's like you, but hotter.

0:20:02 Murph: Butter him up. Say that's what he looks like.

0:20:04 Lou: Cover him in butter.

0:20:04 Murph: Butter up the proctor.

0:20:07 Lou: Be him in butter.

0:20:08 Ally: Butter up the proctor! Butter up the proctor!

0:20:10 Brennan: Okay, so, whenever new monsters show up, go ahead and roll a d20 and let me know if you get evens or odds.

0:20:17 Emily: Okay.

0:20:17 Brennan: Okay? Cool.

0:20:19 Emily: Is this about if they buy my—

0:20:20 Brennan: If they buy your disguise. We'll make it a pure Luck check.

0:20:22 Emily: Okay.

0:20:24 Brennan: Rather, they believe you're both the proctor, but they have to choose one to attack.

0:20:27 Emily: Okay.

0:20:27 Brennan: We'll start at the back door. Roaring forward, leaping from the back gate, Kristen, a manticore leaps forward from the gate. What do you want? Do you want evens or odds? Call it.

0:20:40 Emily: Oh, I already rolled. I got a three.

0:20:42 Brennan: Three, so the manticore looks up at you flying and clocks you as the proctor.

0:20:48 Emily: Okay. This is good and bad. [Brennan screeches]

0:20:52 Brennan: A massive shrimp dragon—

0:20:52 Lou: A shrimp dragon?

0:20:57 Brennan: A shrimp dragon.

0:20:58 Ally: Nasty. It's like raw shrimp, so it's still blue.

0:21:01 Lou: It's both gorgeous.

0:21:01 Emily: He does not think I'm—

0:21:04 Ally: Nasty shrimp, looks so good on top of me.

0:21:09 Brennan: Coming out from this other gate, a roper comes moving out of the far gate there.

0:21:14 Siobhan: Disgusting.

0:21:15 Brennan: Every one of these monsters is so fucking nasty.

0:21:19 Emily: Both of these guys don't think I'm the proctor. I got evens for both of them.

0:21:22 Brennan: Okay, gotcha, so the roper and the shrimp dragon both clock the proctor up there as the problem. A massive umber hulk comes moving out of here. Riz, you can take your attack.

0:21:30 Murph: Blast him.

0:21:32 Brennan: Blast him.

0:21:32 Lou: Blast him!

0:21:35 Murph: 17. Oh wait, I have Bless.

0:21:35 Ally: Yeah!

0:21:40 Murph: 21.

0:21:40 Ally: That's right, that's right.

0:21:41 Brennan: Hell, yeah. Emerging alongside the umber hulk, a swarm of stirges, these nasty infernal mosquitoes, come flying out.

0:21:52 Siobhan: Ew!

0:21:53 Lou: Any chance the rats are gonna defend their livelihood?

0:21:56 Emily: Whoa, rats versus mosquitos!

0:21:58 Brennan: You keep saying “livelihood” like the rats—

0:22:01 Siobhan: They're on the job. Just 'cause they're on a break right now doesn't mean that they don't—

0:22:04 Zac: I'm picturing, like, a shop owner.

0:22:07 Lou: Standing outside with a broom.

0:22:08 Brennan: The rats are like, "I've been working in this coliseum for 40 years, okay?"

0:22:13 Siobhan: “My father and my father's father.”

0:22:16 Brennan: Go ahead and roll for the stirges, if you'd be so kind, as well.

0:22:18 Emily: The stirges.

0:22:18 Murph: 39 damage.

0:22:21 Emily: Stirges do think I'm the proctor.

0:22:22 Murph: 39 damage to the umber hulk.

0:22:23 Brennan: What'd you roll for your attack?

0:22:25 Murph: 21.

0:22:25 Brennan: Cool, that definitely hits. Did you roll for the umber hulk as well, or no?

0:22:29 Emily: I think the umber hulk does not buy me.

0:22:31 Brennan: Okay, so basically—

0:22:32 Emily: I think it's just the stirge and the manticore.

0:22:33 Brennan: So this is really nice, because a huge problem you guys were facing was flying opponents, given where Gavin is. All of the flying opponents on the battlefield believe that Fig is the real proctor.

0:22:44 Ally: Nice.

0:22:44 Zac: There's a lot.

0:22:45 Brennan: There's a lot! Okay, Fabian, it is your turn.

0:22:49 Lou: Okay, I'm gonna step back 10 feet real quick, reach into the mimic, and grab out the Common questions.

0:22:57 Brennan: Go ahead, you go and do that. Okay, the Common.

0:22:59 Lou: 5, 10. Yeah, grab it.

0:23:02 Brennan: Okay, this is a five minute.

0:23:05 Lou: Five minute?

0:23:05 Emily: Woo!

0:23:07 Brennan: This is a five minute challenge.

0:23:10 Lou: Gosh, that's so long. Okay. “Please write a 300 word essay arguing for a proposed improvement at the Aguefort Adventuring Academy in the space provided below.”

0:23:22 Ally: Just gun it. Just gun it.

0:23:25 Murph: We talked about how field study should count more towards grades.

0:23:28 Siobhan: Yes!

0:23:29 Murph: Instead of having to go to classes all the time.

0:23:30 Ally: Yes!

0:23:30 Siobhan: Yes.

0:23:31 Murph: Provides an applicable use of our skills.

0:23:34 Ally: Yes.

0:23:34 Murph: Just go on about that.

0:23:35 Siobhan: We believe a greater amount of our grade should come from actual change that we have made in the world, rather than XP leveling, AKA what the Rat Grinders are doing.

0:23:46 Emily: And chocolate pudding in the water fountain.

0:23:48 Siobhan: Chocolate pudding in the water fountain.

0:23:49 Murph: Add that at the end.

0:23:49 Siobhan: Yes, add that at the end.

0:23:51 Murph: To sort of pad it out.

0:23:51 Zac: If you need more words.

0:23:52 Ally: And Fetty Whap at every school function.

0:23:55 Siobhan: But W-H-A-P, right?

0:23:55 Ally: Yeah, Fetty Whap.

0:23:59 Brennan: I'm also going to set a minute timer, because Fabian actually has to write this essay out, so for every minute, the mimic will get an attack on Fabian as he writes on top of the desk.

0:24:08 Emily: What?

0:24:08 Murph: He's got it, he's got it.

0:24:10 Ally: He's got it, he's got it.

0:24:11 Siobhan: These are physical attacks and not spell attacks?

0:24:14 Ally: I'm gonna stand above and I’m going to the count the words over—

0:24:17 Brennan: Oh yeah, so Ally's gonna count the words.

0:24:19 Siobhan: Does it have to be 300 words?

0:24:21 Brennan: It has to be 300 words.

0:24:21 Siobhan: Oh my god.

0:24:23 Murph: It's all good. He's got it.

0:24:24 Siobhan: Lou, you're doing absolutely incredible.

0:24:26 Zac: You're really rising. You're really rising to the occasion.

0:24:29 Siobhan: We believe in you so much. Spring break.

0:24:30 Brennan: Spring break.

0:24:31 Ally: Throw as many "the"s as you can, as many "a"s as you can.

0:24:36 Siobhan: Doesn't have to be good, it just has to be long.

0:24:37 Murph: How're we doing, Beardsley?

0:24:40 Ally: 35.

0:24:40 Zac: 35 words?

0:24:42 Lou: No way!

0:24:42 Ally: Yeah.

0:24:43 Zac: That's it?

0:24:43 Murph: You got it. Keep going.

0:24:44 Ally: You got it! Keep going, keep going!

0:24:45 Siobhan: Keep going!

0:24:46 Murph: Hand it over if your hand gets tired.

0:24:47 Ally: Yeah.

0:24:47 Siobhan: Yes!

0:24:50 Zac: So do we need to brainstorm other parts of this?

0:24:53 Siobhan: Can we just pass this one? Do we maybe just wanna pass it?

0:24:55 Murph: Is it helpful for us to keep talking, Lou, or not helpful?

0:24:59 Lou: 50/50. I do think I will hand it off in a second.

0:25:02 Siobhan: Great.

0:25:04 Brennan: Fabian takes 11 points of damage as he's on a fucking mimic writing this essay out. As these other monsters begin to crawl out from the thing, roaring, the shrimp dragon [snarls] its wings. The roper begins lashing its tentacles. The swarm of stirges... [buzzing] Fabian just burning so much lead, flying through it as fast as possible.

0:25:26 Lou: Who's next?

0:25:26 Murph: I can go.

0:25:28 Siobhan: I'm a slow writer.

0:25:30 Brennan: It is passed off.

0:25:30 Ally: Almost like Exquisite Corpse style. You just started a sentence.

0:25:32 Brennan: Incredible. You toss it to Riz.

0:25:35 Fabian: Riz!

0:25:37 Brennan: Who grabs it and starts writing up against the other thing. Riz, stirges are flying towards you. Fabian, go ahead and take the rest of your turn.

0:25:44 Lou: Great, me and the hound will close on the roper.

0:25:48 Brennan: Okay, attack of opportunity. So you did take that damage.

0:25:50 Lou: I take 11.

0:25:52 Brennan: Take 11 points of damage. The mimic misses its attack of opportunity. You close on the roper.

0:25:57 Lou: Great. Okay, close on the roper. I'll take my attack on it first. First attack is a

0:26:11 Brennan: 28 hits.

0:26:13 Lou: Second attack—

0:26:13 Murph: We take the auto thing?

0:26:15 Zac: I mean, we could.

0:26:15 Lou: Does an 18 hit?

0:26:18 Brennan: 18 does not hit.

0:26:18 Lou: 18 does not hit.

0:26:20 Ally: You're Blessed!

0:26:20 Lou: I hit it with the Bless. So for that first attack, we'll make it a Goading Attack. DC 17 Wisdom saving throw.

0:26:28 Brennan: Fails the Wisdom save.

0:26:31 Lou: Great, disadvantage on attacks against anyone but me. We'll burn a 2nd level spell slot for 2d6. We'll also make this a Defensive Flourish.

0:26:39 Brennan: Okay.

0:26:41 Lou: My AC goes up to just 21. Great. 5, 8, 14.

0:26:48 Zac: [quietly to Siobhan] Give that to Beardsley. [hands the stamp over]

0:26:49 Lou: 16. Siobhan passes the stamp to Ally.

0:26:49 Zac: Just in case, Beardsley.

0:26:52 Lou: 25 points of damage—

0:26:54 Brennan: Woo!

0:26:54 Lou: ...for my attack. I'm gonna roll to see if the Hangman's fire breath recharges.

0:26:58 Brennan: Another minute passes. Riz, the stirges' fire, poison barbs that you dodge while writing the essay on the wall—

0:27:07 Zac: We're getting kinda close.

0:27:08 Siobhan: We're getting close.

0:27:08 Ally: Are we done?

0:27:09 Lou: Oh, is there any chance I could roll a second—

0:27:12 Siobhan: Yeah, print it.

0:27:13 Lou: I had Help from the steam mephit.

0:27:14 Brennan: All right, pass it? Okay, auto pass. [Murph sighs in relief]

0:27:17 Brennan: Let's see how many words we were close to here.

0:27:19 Ally: This is 50, 75, 100.

0:27:22 Murph: Oh wow, we shouldn't have even tried.

0:27:23 Ally: Yeah.

0:27:24 Brennan: Can we go ahead and read the essay we have?

0:27:26 Lou: “We believe a greater amount of our grade should come from the actual good we do in the world. Given the number of times our adventuring party have been put in a situation [Ally screaming] where the actual fate of our very existence has hung in the balance, it seems only fitting that the result of our efforts impact our academic study. In considering the ultimate... What is this?

0:27:46 Murph: I think I just crossed that one out.

0:27:48 Lou: “Considering the ultimate goal is to become adventurers, it makes the most sense that actual application of our skills would be most important. It actually adventuring doesn't—”

0:28:00 Murph: If actual adventuring doesn't—

0:28:01 Lou: “If actual adventuring doesn't show our skills, what will? No matter how many classes I take, it won't make me a better bard or fighter. I, Fabian Seacaster, son of the great Bill Seacaster, privateer, not pirate…” That was a freshman year thing!

0:28:18 Murph: You've got to just fill it.

0:28:18 Ally: Yeah, exactly.

0:28:20 Brennan: You see, so when that stamp comes in, all of that, you guys actually manage to fill out a full 300 word essay with basically just having— there was a moment last fall where you guys wrote this like you were gonna submit it to the school. So that is not just a cheater pass. That is, earlier academic success prepared you for this moment.

0:28:41 Lou: Great.

0:28:44 Brennan: Fabian, rest of your turn.

0:28:45 Lou: I had advantage on that roll from the steam mephits. Can I try one more time?

0:28:48 Brennan: Yeah, go for it.

0:28:51 Lou: That's the same thing.

0:28:51 Brennan: Okay. Hellhound. How about the Hangman?

0:28:55 Lou: Doesn't recharge his breath weapon, so it'll just take a bite attack.

0:28:58 Brennan: Cool.

0:29:00 Lou: 18 to hit.

0:29:00 Brennan: 18 does not hit.

0:29:02 Lou: Great. Because of Pack Tactics, it has advantage as well. That's even worse.

0:29:07 Brennan: Okay. The roper, it's like a living stalagmite. This rocky, horrifying, tentacled thing comes scuttling out of the darkness. You take swings at it. Fabian, both of your academic challenges have been passed.

0:29:19 Lou: Great.

0:29:21 Brennan: This is going to be the mimic's turn, and you've used one of your two academic resources. The mimic is gonna go, gonna continue to... [snarl] Now that it's empty, it's gonna come swing at Adaine. Let's see if it hits. It does not hit Adaine. No interaction there. The roper's turn. Your AC is 21, correct?

0:29:42 Lou: 21 currently, yes.

0:29:42 Brennan: Okay. [dice rattling and rolling] Okay, one tendril hits.

0:29:49 Lou: Did another one miss?

0:29:50 Brennan: Three of them missed.

0:29:50 Lou: I'll Riposte one of them.

0:29:52 Brennan: Woo!

0:29:54 Lou: I don't think so. 18 again.

0:29:54 Brennan: 18 does not do it.

0:29:57 Zac: Do your add your—

0:29:57 Brennan: Bless?

0:30:00 Lou: Oh. 20?

0:30:02 Brennan: 20 does it!

0:30:03 Lou: Great.

0:30:03 Emily: Yeah!

0:30:04 Brennan: There it is.

0:30:04 Lou: There it is, and we'll burn a 1st level spell slot with Fandrangor. ♪ Doo doo doo ♪ 17 more points of damage.

0:30:14 Brennan: Still looking pretty tough, but you've hit it hard a couple of times.

0:30:17 Lou: Got it.

0:30:19 Brennan: This thing is gonna hit you with one tendril. It deals… Oh, no no, I'm wrong. I'm wrong, sorry. You are grappled.

0:30:23 Lou: Ew!

0:30:25 Brennan: You are restrained, you have disadvantage on Strength checks and Strength saving throws. It pulls you right up towards its mouth, and now it's going to make a bite attack. It hits. [Lou whimpers] Now it is going to deal— [dice rattling]

0:30:42 Zac: Is that, like, d4s?

0:30:43 Siobhan: Yeah, just a bunch of d4s.

0:30:45 Lou: Yeah!

0:30:45 Brennan: It deals 31 points of damage to you, and then it is going to use its... It slides backwards, holding you in its mouth and tentacle to begin ascending the wall.

0:30:59 Fabian: Adaine! [Adaine stammers anxiously]

0:31:02 Fabian: Adaine!

0:31:02 Brennan: Fig.

0:31:04 Adaine: I don't know why you're yelling for me! I don't know what I could do for you!

0:31:07 Brennan: That is gonna be you, Fig.

0:31:08 Emily: Okay. What are these things again?

0:31:12 Brennan: Those are stirges. They're nasty, infernal mosquitos. And that's an umber hulk.

0:31:16 Emily: Infernal, so they're gonna be resistant to fire damage.

0:31:19 Murph: I think they're also, like, that shrimp dragon is bad news. That manticore's bad news.

0:31:23 Emily: Yeah, I just think that I'm more of an area of effect person.

0:31:27 Murph: I think— Have your horse give you Help.

0:31:29 Emily: I mean, I can try. I'm gonna go fly down to my thing and get my second—

0:31:35 Brennan: Hell, yeah. This is gonna be Driver's Ed. [Lou laughs]

0:31:38 Emily: Yeah.

0:31:39 Brennan: This is a one minute challenge.

0:31:42 Emily: Okay.

0:31:43 Brennan: Begin.

0:31:44 Emily: Okay, “what is the proper way to reverse a vehicle's orientation 180 degrees while driving at top speed? A, signal the turn correctly. B, slowly decrease acceleration. C, engage the emergency brake. It's gonna be that one. D, rebuild the car facing the other way while driving.”

0:32:02 Ally: Maybe that one.

0:32:02 Siobhan: I mean, all of the above?

0:32:04 Murph: I think we hit the emergency brake.

0:32:06 Emily: We hit the emergency brake. C, engage the emergency brake.

0:32:08 Ally: Slide!

0:32:09 Brennan: That is correct! There we go. Mr. Thistlespring, if you would kindly?

0:32:13 Ally: Stamp that shit!

0:32:16 Brennan: Bam, here we go. All right, Fig, that is the rest of your turn.

0:32:20 Emily: Okay, rest of my turn. I guess the question—yeah, 'cause Fireball's the only thing that I have that does a lot of things. Okay, you guys think I should try and just attack this guy rather than doing area of effect?

0:32:31 Siobhan: Yeah, I think so. I have area of effect against those guys.

0:32:33 Murph: We need people that do a lot of damage to start taking out these big guys.

0:32:36 Emily: Okay, all right. [clears throat]

0:32:38 Murph: Not the same dice as before, right?

0:32:40 Emily: It's a different die.

0:32:40 Ally: Yeah, great.

0:32:42 Murph: You want one that's been rolling good for me?

0:32:43 Emily: No, 'cause I'll ruin yours.

0:32:43 Zac: No!

0:32:45 Emily: Okay, all right, all right.

0:32:47 Brennan: Here we go, charging in on the shrimp dragon.

0:32:48 Emily: Charging up my Booming Blade. Let me just do a real quick check. Is he gonna be not… Does this guy look like he's radiant?

0:32:58 Brennan: No, he looks like a weird, nasty shrimp monster.

0:33:00 Ally: The fire is gonna cook him, and he's gonna be a delicious piece of shrimp.

0:33:02 Murph: He's gonna be a delicious fried shrimp.

0:33:03 Ally: Yeah, you got this.

0:33:06 Siobhan: Cook that shrimp! Cook that shrimp! Cook that shrimp!

0:33:07 Murph: You got Help if you need it. You got a Luck point if you need it.

0:33:10 Ally: [chanting] Cook that shrimp!

0:33:10 Lou: What?

0:33:11 Zac: Cook that shrimp!

0:33:11 Lou: Who?

0:33:13 Emily: Okay, 15 on the die.

0:33:13 Siobhan: There we go.

0:33:15 Emily: Plus a one. 26 to hit.

0:33:19 Brennan: 26 hits!

0:33:19 Siobhan: Nice. [Zac claps]

0:33:20 Emily: Okay!

0:33:20 Ally: That's right! That's right!

0:33:23 Emily: I am going to do my Booming Blade, my thing, and I'm gonna do my very first 4th level Smite. Zac/Siobhan: Woo!

0:33:29 Brennan: 5d8. Here we go.

0:33:32 Emily: Okay, so that's two ones on the Booming Blade, so that's two damage there. [die rolling] Seven, so nine from my thing and the other thing. Now let me do my… [dice rolling] Okay, okay. 38 damage.

0:33:53 Brennan: Woo! Describe what it looks like as you go and absolutely brain this shrimp dragon with the Infaethable Bass.

0:34:01 Emily: I think that it's sunlight, actually, coming out of it. I think that instead of the infernal fireball, I think that I play something, I play the starting chord to "Dawn of Justice", and then my bass lights up with sunlight, and then I—

0:34:19 Ally: Like that early morning, orange-ish pink reverse sunset.

0:34:23 Emily: Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Like when the sunrise looks like erupting flames.

0:34:27 Brennan: Incredible. You all watch as light shreds through the weird, translucent, squishy in the wrong places, hard and sharp in the wrong places-

0:34:37 Ally: Look at that huge shit vein.

0:34:39 Brennan: The shrimp dragon goes [gibbering] as you hit it in the head. Any bonus actions from Fig?

0:34:45 Emily: No, I'm gonna stay in range of him.

0:34:47 Brennan: Cool.

0:34:47 Emily: So that if he… Also, when he moves, he'll take 3d8 more damage.

0:34:52 Brennan: Oh, amazing.

0:34:52 Emily: And also stay within range, so my Spirit Guardians can hit him.

0:34:55 Brennan: Oh, that's awesome. That's a ton of damage coming his way. Go ahead and also, if your steed wants to take any attacks, go for it.

0:35:01 Emily: Oh, okay. Yeah!

0:35:04 Brennan: You got it. There you go.

0:35:04 Emily: All right, come on. Show up for me, baby. Okay, he gets a 19 to hit.

0:35:10 Brennan: 19 hits. Go ahead and roll damage.

0:35:12 Siobhan: Nice.

0:35:13 Emily: He rolls better than me. Look at you!

0:35:19 Brennan: Boom, boom boom boom! This massive Daymare, this solar horse, boom, boom, just covering this thing in huge hoof marks. The shrimp dragon, not looking bloodied, but for one of the more fearsome creatures to appear on the battlefield, is already quite injured just with Fig alone, like a solar avenging angel fiend, boom boom boom, pounding down with the Infaethable Bass. That is Fig. Any bonus actions from you, or are you all good?

0:35:46 Emily: I see Gorgug. I'll just give him a Bardic.

0:35:49 Gorgug: Hell, yeah.

0:35:49 Zac: Nice.

0:35:51 Emily: It's a d10 now.

0:35:52 Brennan: Gorgug, you get a d10 Bardic, and you are up next, my friend.

0:35:55 Zac: I think I'm just gonna, from here, whirl my axe and throw it a couple more times.

0:36:01 Brennan: Hell, yeah. Go for it. Are you going for the shrimp dragon? Who are you going for?

0:36:05 Zac: Shrimp dragon.

0:36:05 Brennan: Cool, let's do it.

0:36:07 Zac: Trying to get rid of him before he goes. Nat 20!

0:36:10 Emily: Oh my god!

0:36:11 Siobhan: Awesome!

0:36:11 Brennan: What the fuck is going—

0:36:12 Murph: [pumps his fist] I'll take it.

0:36:12 Lou: Same dice, right?

0:36:14 Brennan: I think you see—

0:36:14 Emily: It is the same dice.

0:36:16 Brennan: As Fig, with radiant solar fire in her hair, winks down at you, you feel the engines you have built here, all these little gnomish gadgets picking up as this primal rage... [grunts] High school is a hard time, and figuring out who you wanna be is one of the biggest, most important jobs there is, and you defied everyone's expectations and told the world who you were gonna be. The Heavy Metal Axe flies from your hand. You crit. That's just your first attack.

0:36:46 Zac: That would knock him prone.

0:36:49 Brennan: That would absolutely knock him prone.

0:36:51 Zac: Does that pull him out of the Spirit Guardians?

0:36:53 Brennan: I'll say you're close enough to the ground that it would not pull him out of the Spirit Guardians. He's also so big that even on the ground, he's still rising like 10 feet into the air, right?

0:37:00 Zac: Gotcha, okay.

0:37:00 Brennan: Awesome.

0:37:03 Zac: Then I'm just gonna keep going. 17 on the die, so that hits, I imagine.

0:37:08 Brennan: Yeah, absolutely.

0:37:08 Zac: Almost 30. And then Reckless.

0:37:11 Brennan: Awesome.

0:37:11 Zac: I mean, not Reckless. 19 on the die. That’s another crit.

0:37:15 Brennan: Jesus Christ. Two crits and a hit. Go ahead and roll damage.

0:37:20 Zac: All right, so these are the two crits.

0:37:22 Siobhan: Fucking gorgeous.

0:37:22 Lou: Fucking gorgeous, Gorgug.

0:37:24 Murph: Gorgeous.

0:37:24 Siobhan: Gorg-geous.

0:37:24 Zac: It's this plus 16.

0:37:24 Ally: Gorjudge.

0:37:29 Zac: Okay.

0:37:29 Ally: Jerjudge.

0:37:30 Siobhan: Jerjuj.

0:37:30 Lou: Gorguj.

0:37:32 Zac: Another 9, so 58 plus another 8, so 64 damage.

0:37:38 Brennan: Jesus Christ.

0:37:38 Siobhan: Unstoppable.

0:37:41 Brennan: The shrimp dragon—

0:37:41 Zac: I can't stop critting!

0:37:45 Brennan: You just see horrifying, viscous, gel-like blood oozing out of this shrimp dragon. [gibbering]

0:37:55 Zac: Ragh is the shrimp king!

0:37:58 Brennan: Shrimp dragon looking maybe not quite at death's door, but closer to it than to anything else. Incredible turn from Gorgug. Any movement from you?

0:38:06 Zac: I think I'm gonna go 5, 10, 15, 20, to be over here, I think.

0:38:09 Brennan: Cool. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

0:38:11 Zac: Just to be able to kind of...

0:38:14 Brennan: Hell, yeah.

0:38:14 Zac: See what's going on there.

0:38:15 Brennan: Fabian, you've been taking damage. You don't have any Concentration on anything, right?

0:38:18 Lou: No, I do not.

0:38:18 Brennan: Cool. All right, Gorgug, that is your turn. Kristen Applebees, that is you.

0:38:24 Ally: Okay.

0:38:24 Siobhan: Oh, I took damage. [die rolling] I'm good.

0:38:28 Brennan: Okay, great.

0:38:30 Ally: I reach into my desk, grab my last little test.

0:38:32 Siobhan: Oh wait, I didn't. 'Cause I have my Mirror Image. That's why.

0:38:35 Brennan: This also is a one minute exam.

0:38:39 Siobhan: Fuck.

0:38:40 Brennan: And, begin. Medicine.

0:38:43 Ally: “What is the most certain way for a wounded adventurer to make a full recovery from even the most grievous injuries? Being healed by a powerful cleric, drink an artifact-level healing potion, receive a Greater Restoration from a celestial, lie down for eight hours.”

0:38:56 Murph: Lie down for eight hours. That's a long rest.

0:38:59 Emily: Yeah, that's a long rest, baby.

0:39:01 Ally: Lie down for eight hours.

0:39:03 Brennan: That is correct!

0:39:03 Ally: Stamp it! Stamp it!

0:39:06 Brennan: Stamp it, stamp it, stamp it!

0:39:08 Zac: Should I stamp it? Should I stamp it?

0:39:11 Brennan: “Should I stamp it?” [players whoop]

0:39:11 Brennan: Woo, baby! All right, Kristen, the rest of your turn. Big mob over here. Roper has got Fabian in a tight spot. Manticore coming with these ochre jellies, approaching you. Shrimp dragon, very fearsome, badly injured. That's the lay of the land.

0:39:26 Emily: It's in my Spirit Guardians, so I might be able to get him.

0:39:29 Murph: Yeah, how injured is Fabian?

0:39:30 Lou: 50.

0:39:31 Murph: You got 50 HP?

0:39:32 Lou: If I get bit again, it'll be bad, but I can make it through.

0:39:37 Ally: I'll start making my way over there. I'll do 5, 10, 15.

0:39:42 Brennan: Cool.

0:39:42 Ally: From standing right here, I'm going to use my staff and cast Banishment on this.

0:39:49 Brennan: On the manticore. Sick as hell.

0:39:51 Siobhan: Great. I'm afraid of that manticore.

0:39:53 Brennan: Banishment is Concentration, so you'll be losing one of your Concentration effects.

0:39:56 Ally: Okay, great.

0:39:57 Emily: You could lose Circle of Power.

0:39:58 Ally: Yeah, I'll lose Circle of Power.

0:39:59 Brennan: Cool, yeah, you're looking at it, and you're not seeing that many spellcasters emerge from this competition, or this examination.

0:40:06 Ally: Great.

0:40:06 Brennan: Lose Circle of Power. Cast Banishment. Banishment, I believe, is a Charisma saving throw, correct?

0:40:11 Ally: Yep.

0:40:11 Brennan: Okay, manticore, not very charismatic.

0:40:13 Siobhan: You're kidding.

0:40:15 Brennan: Needs an 18 or higher on the die, or this manticore simply goes away. [die rolling] That is a five. Incredible. [players cheering]

0:40:28 Brennan: Describe what we see and where you send this manticore.

0:40:32 Ally: I'm doing homework, so I'm just kind of really quietly scribbling for a second, and then I stand up and I go, Jesus Christ. I grab my staff, and it has those charges to it, so I use a little under half of them and I lift it up and I would say almost like Magic 8 Ball kind of vibe.

0:40:50 Brennan: Yeah.

0:40:51 Ally: Darkness and blue swirl out and rip it away from this plane, and let's have it go to… Is it from a different plane?

0:40:59 Brennan: It's a terrestrial monster, but you can send it to another plane of existence. You can send it to the woods that Cassandra is from.

0:41:05 Ally: I send it to the Rat Grinders' woods.

0:41:09 Brennan: You see that the manticore looks at you, going, [roars] and it leaps in the air, taking wing, and then it starts to, its wings— “Gavin Pundle” (Fig): My name is Gavin Pundle, and you can't touch me.

0:41:22 Brennan: Its wings start flapping.

0:41:22 Ally: [laughs] So ripped! Zac flexes pretending to be Fig as Gavin Pundle.

0:41:23 Brennan: And it goes [whimpers] and it's like the die inside of a Magic 8 Ball where it just starts to get purple, float upwards, and vanish. Bloop, bloop, bloop, bloop! Gone, whoosh.

0:41:33 Ally: That was half my movement, so then I'm gonna do: can I jump up here?

0:41:37 Brennan: Yeah, absolutely. Cool, awesome. That's about the rest of your movement. That follows with you. Any bonus actions from Kristen?

0:41:44 Ally: How close are you? I'd love to do a bonus action Healing Word.

0:41:47 Brennan: Healing Word?

0:41:47 Ally: To Fah-bian. Zac/Siobhan: Fah-bian!

0:41:49 Brennan: I think—

0:41:50 Ally: 60 feet, yeah.

0:41:50 Brennan: 60 feet. Let's see. 60 from Kristen. Exactly 60 feet, baby.

0:41:56 Ally: Amazing. Great.

0:41:56 Brennan: Hell, yeah. So go ahead and roll that d4 plus your Wisdom.

0:42:00 Ally: I'll do a higher level, I think.

0:42:02 Brennan: Okay.

0:42:02 Gorgug: Stay with us, Fabian.

0:42:04 Fabian: I'm fine, mostly.

0:42:04 Riz: Stay with us!

0:42:07 Gorgug: Don't go towards the light.

0:42:07 Fabian: No, I'm not that—

0:42:09 Kristen: It's too early!

0:42:09 Gorgug: We can't lose you!

0:42:12 Ally: Eight plus my spellcasting ability?

0:42:14 Brennan: Eight plus your spellcasting ability.

0:42:16 Ally: So 13.

0:42:17 Brennan: 13 total back to Fabian.

0:42:20 Lou: Ooh!

0:42:21 Brennan: Incredible. Okay, that is Kristen. After Kristen goes, the ochre jellies go again. to the base. [slurps]

0:42:32 Murph: They're going for the proctor.

0:42:34 Gorgug: They're very slowly going for the proctor! Hurry!

0:42:38 Fabian: Get out of the way, Gavin!

0:42:40 Brennan: Okay, the stirges are going to go. They have a fly speed of 40 feet.

0:42:48 Emily: Wait, but don't they think—

0:42:48 Brennan: They think it's you.

0:42:51 Murph: Oh, rad.

0:42:51 Brennan: So this Gavin, this would've been very, very bad. So 80 feet. Okay, so Fig, because you are hovering in three-dimensional space, you have more than eight spaces around you 'cause you have ones on top of you and diagonally, in other directions, the swarm of stirges-

0:43:10 Emily: They're all gonna take radiant damage as soon they come within 15 feet of me because of my Spirit Guardians.

0:43:15 Brennan: They don't know that there's a spell going on.

0:43:17 Emily: Yeah.

0:43:17 Ally: They're just like, ah!

0:43:19 Brennan: They're like, "There is Gavin Pundle!"

0:43:22 Zac: It's like a bug zapper.

0:43:22 Brennan: Literally, Fig is literally—

0:43:26 Ally: You just hear... [mimics electricity crackling]

0:43:27 Brennan: ...is literally a bug zapper. Okay, all of the stirges are gonna fly and surround you. [Brennan buzzing aggressively] It happens when they enter?

0:43:37 Emily: Yeah, it's the first time they enter on their turn, or start a turn there.

0:43:40 Brennan: Wait, it's the first time they enter or start a turn there, and then I have a question. Does the save negate damage or is it half damage?

0:43:47 Emily: Okay, when you cast a spell, an affected creature's speed is halved in the area, and when the creature enters the area for the first time on a turn or starts it there, it must make a Wisdom saving throw. On a failed save, it takes 3d8 radiant damage. On a successful save, it takes half.

0:44:00 Brennan: Okay, go ahead and roll 3d8.

0:44:02 Emily: Oh no, I did upcast it, so it's more.

0:44:04 Brennan: Okay, how much is it?

0:44:05 Emily: It is 19 damage.

0:44:08 Brennan: All of you watch the stirge— [players laughing]

0:44:14 Brennan: You don't know what's gonna happen.

0:44:15 Ally: So sick.

0:44:15 Siobhan: We don't? Zac flips Brennan off.

0:44:17 Brennan: You don't know what's gonna happen. You really don't know.

0:44:21 Ally: They all start making out.

0:44:24 Brennan: All of the stirges emerge, fly directly past the real Gavin Pundle, many of them bumping into and hitting the actual Gavin Pundle, [buzzing] and all of them fly and do not even get within range of Fig before they are shredded by red, glowing crystals surrounding Fig. There's no point in making a saving throw. Half damage, they are fucking gone. All of them fly straight into their own death.

0:44:56 Emily: That's really good.

0:44:56 Ally: That's so sick.

0:44:57 Siobhan: That was great. That was really funny.

0:44:58 Zac: That's just sorta gloriously efficient.

0:45:02 Murph: Yeah, I could literally never kill those dudes. It would literally take me 10 turns.

0:45:08 Brennan: That's the thing, Riz would be taken down by a mob of stirges, hands-down, absolutely.

0:45:12 Ally: It's your combo of Deception plus the Spirit Guardians.

0:45:16 Siobhan: Yeah.

0:45:16 Brennan: That is so fucking funny! They were gonna be so dangerous and bad. They were definitely gonna kill—

0:45:22 Ally: What were they gonna do?

0:45:23 Brennan: They were gonna kill Gavin Pundle for sure! I mean, for sure. He has no hit points. So it doesn't matter that they're weenies. They can fly.

0:45:32 Siobhan: And there's so many of them, and I'm sure they're poisonous.

0:45:34 Brennan: And they're poisonous, and they drink your blood. They're so bad. What they don't have is brains or hit points. That's a potent combo. Fig, you watch. I think you turn to see them approaching as this swarm [buzzes aggressively] and just one by one... [whimpering pathetically] Not one gets through.

0:45:56 Gorgug: Fig, look out! Or, uh, never mind.

0:46:00 Emily: Hearing wet bodies fall to the ground.

0:46:02 Ally: Ew! Ew!

0:46:02 Brennan: Unbelievable. Blam, blam, blam, blam. Okay, umber hulk is going to go. It's gonna go.

0:46:10 Murph: I have two extra AC from Haste.

0:46:13 Lou: Did he pass those rats?

0:46:14 Siobhan: Rats get an opportunity attack?

0:46:16 Brennan: Rats are not combatants.

0:46:18 Zac: 19 AC right now.

0:46:18 Lou: They have to defend their livelihood.

0:46:20 Brennan: 19 AC right now, gotcha.

0:46:22 Ally: Including that gift? Did that already bump you up?

0:46:24 Murph: That had to be, I'm not wearing armor, right? So I think that took me from my base AC of 15 to 17.

0:46:30 Ally: Oh, nice.

0:46:30 Murph: Which gives me 19.

0:46:31 Brennan: Misses you twice and wheels around to sink its mandibles into Kristen Applebees for 12 points of damage.

0:46:37 Ally: What? What?

0:46:39 Brennan: That is gonna be two Concentration saving throws.

0:46:42 Zac: Also, it would be halved.

0:46:46 Brennan: Oh, that's right, so it's six, and then [pointing at Zac] you take six, right?

0:46:47 Zac: Yeah.

0:46:50 Siobhan: Nice.

0:46:50 Emily: Yeahhh.

0:46:50 Murph: Okay.

0:46:51 Brennan: I need to see something about Warding Bond, though.

0:46:54 Emily: Warding Bond combined with being a barbarian.

0:46:57 Brennan: Yeah, being with rage.

0:47:00 Emily: I feel like you would.

0:47:00 Zac: I think I should.

0:47:02 Brennan: You take the same amount of damage.

0:47:03 Siobhan: I would say yes.

0:47:03 Brennan: I'm gonna say that because the damage is piercing damage, it is halved. I was gonna say the damage stays typed to the spell. So the Warding Bond activates. You take six points of damage. You take six halved to three. [Zac grunts in pain]

0:47:18 Brennan: But this massive, insectile umber hulk leaps up in this direction, and that is going to be its turn.

0:47:26 Ally: What do I do for the saves?

0:47:27 Brennan: Okay, they're both gonna be DC 10, but you're gonna make one for Bless and then make one for the Banishment.

0:47:32 Ally: And this one was for Bless.

0:47:32 Brennan: Okay.

0:47:35 Ally: I'm at eight. Oh, I have a Bardic still.

0:47:37 Emily: Yeah, you started with a d10.

0:47:39 Siobhan: Yes. Lou/Brennan: d10.

0:47:41 Ally: Five, okay.

0:47:41 Brennan: Okay, you hold onto Bless. Now you're gonna roll for Banishment. You can add the d4 to this as well.

0:47:47 Ally: 13.

0:47:49 Brennan: You're good to go.

0:47:49 Ally: 17.

0:47:51 Brennan: You hold onto both Concentrations as this thing sinks its mandibles into you. That is going to go... [sighs] That is gonna be the shrimp dragon's turn.

0:48:00 Emily: Okay.

0:48:00 Brennan: Spirit Guardians.

0:48:01 Emily: It starts out taking 19 damage, but he has a Wisdom save.

0:48:05 Brennan: 19 damage, Wisdom save.

0:48:07 Emily: And his movement is halved.

0:48:09 Brennan: Makes the save.

0:48:09 Emily: Okay.

0:48:11 Brennan: So takes nine points of damage. [screeches] Looking so bad, the red crystal shredding into the dragon. Now, he knows that you're gonna smack him if he flies away, so he may not do that. He's gonna stay in your threatened area, but get up here. I'm gonna keep him here, but he's a little bit—

0:48:34 Emily: Well, he's moving, so he takes 13 more damage.

0:48:39 Brennan: Oh, 13. Hell, yes.

0:48:39 Ally: Yes!

0:48:41 Zac: Oh shit, and he was prone, so his movement was halved again.

0:48:44 Brennan: Okay, yeah yeah yeah. Okay, you deal 13 damage?

0:48:47 Emily: 13 more damage, yeah.

0:48:48 Brennan: This dragon is looking so, so badly injured, but he's going to land here and he is going to do a cone breath weapon. It's gonna catch you, your steed, the proctor, and Gorgug in it. Everyone on the other side is protected by the cover of the obstacle. I am going to need Dexterity saving throws from Fig, her steed, Gorgug, and Gavin Pundle.

0:49:18 Lou: Sweet Gavin.

0:49:18 Zac: And I can see this, so I can do this with advantage?

0:49:21 Brennan: That is correct.

0:49:24 Zac: Do I add Bless to this?

0:49:25 Brennan: Yes, you can add Bless to this.

0:49:27 Emily: I'm gonna have to use a Luck point for myself.

0:49:29 Ally: Attack and saving throw.

0:49:31 Zac: 19.

0:49:31 Brennan: 19, okay.

0:49:33 Emily: 16 for me.

0:49:33 Brennan: Okay.

0:49:36 Zac: I can give you—

0:49:36 Ally: Yeah.

0:49:40 Zac: He's gonna be kinda fucked no matter what, right? I'm trying to think of who I should give my—

0:49:44 Murph: I mean, he might be outright killed.

0:49:46 Emily: 22 for my mount.

0:49:46 Siobhan: What did Gavin get?

0:49:49 Brennan: We're gonna roll for him in the Box of Doom. The dragon lowers down, and a superheated, glowing blast of lava-hot acid bursts out of his mouth, dealing 44 points of damage. However, you got a?

0:50:07 Zac: I got a 19.

0:50:08 Brennan: Okay, and you got?

0:50:08 Emily: 22 for him. I only got a 16.

0:50:12 Brennan: You all save.

0:50:12 Emily: Okay.

0:50:13 Brennan: So that's 44 halved to 22. But your rage doesn't cut it any more than that, because it's a non-bludgeoning, slashing, piercing.

0:50:23 Zac: I might Absorb Elements.

0:50:23 Brennan: Okay.

0:50:27 Emily: I'm gonna use a Luck point.

0:50:28 Zac: I'm trying to think if I—

0:50:29 Emily: Trying to keep my Concentration on my Spirit Guardians. Maybe not.

0:50:31 Zac: Can I Flash of Genius you?

0:50:34 Brennan: You could Flash of Genius on one of those Concentration checks.

0:50:38 Emily: Let me see. A nine plus five, 14.

0:50:42 Zac: Plus three?

0:50:42 Emily: 22. Oh, it only has to be half.

0:50:44 Brennan: Yeah, it's 11. The DC is only 11.

0:50:45 Emily: Oh, so I make it.

0:50:46 Brennan: You made it. Concentration's good, yeah. It's only half, so because you made the Dex save, your Concentration was only—

0:50:51 Zac: I will drop rage and Absorb Elements.

0:50:55 Ally: Nice.

0:50:55 Brennan: Okay. Drop rage. Absorb Elements. Hell, yeah. That's gonna be halved to 11. You'll still make a Concentration for holding onto Enhance Ability. That's gonna be—

0:51:03 Zac: I got 11 on the die, so that should be good.

0:51:09 Brennan: Gavin needs a 13 or higher on the die to save for half. That is a 16 on the die.

0:51:16 Emily: Yeah!

0:51:19 Brennan: He saves for half. That's 22 points of damage. He also has Death Ward on him, right?

0:51:23 Ally: Yes.

0:51:24 Lou: Which means that when he dies, will that count as a death, or will it—

0:51:27 Zac: Keep him at one?

0:51:29 Lou: 'Cause yeah, he doesn't go to zero.

0:51:30 Brennan: “You touch a creature and grant it a measure of protection from death. The first time the target would drop to zero, it instead drops to one.” So you guys basically get a one time pause button on one of these monsters dropping Gavin.

0:51:40 Ally: Until we recast! [to Zac] We both have Death Ward, right?

0:51:43 Zac: I don't have it.

0:51:43 Ally: Warding Bond. Got it.

0:51:46 Brennan: Gavin takes 22 points of damage, goes,

0:51:46 Gavin Pundle: Oh, come on!

0:51:50 Brennan: And just sort of wipes the acid off his face. Ah! Ow, ow! And writes something down in his notebook. He is looking bloodied, but he is not dropped.

0:51:59 Murph: Okay, so Death Ward has not been used, but we should heal him.

0:52:00 Ally: Yeah.

0:52:01 Brennan: That is the shrimp dragon's turn. Adaine Abernant, that is you.

0:52:05 Siobhan: Great, first of all, I'm gonna take my exam.

0:52:08 Brennan: Okay, here we go.

0:52:09 Lou: That's right, we're also doing... [chuckles]

0:52:12 Murph: How many do we have right now?

0:52:14 Lou: I'm done.

0:52:15 Murph: I'm done.

0:52:15 Ally: I'm done.

0:52:16 Zac: I don't know if I've done any of mine.

0:52:18 Brennan: Gorgug has not done either of his, and actually, after Adaine, you will be the only one with them left.

0:52:22 Zac: Okay.

0:52:22 Murph: So Fig's already done two?

0:52:24 Brennan: Fig's done two. This is a one minute exam. This also has extra credit.

0:52:30 Murph: Okay.

0:52:30 Siobhan: Okay.

0:52:32 Brennan: Begin.

0:52:33 Siobhan: “What is the most powerful form of magic?” Chronomancy, of course.

0:52:35 Emily: Chronomancy!

0:52:36 Brennan: That is correct!

0:52:36 Siobhan: “What is the easiest object in which to magically trap an opponent?”

0:52:41 Emily: A gem?

0:52:41 Murph: A palimpsest?

0:52:42 Siobhan: A palimpsest? Yeah, 'cause it's been scraped clean?

0:52:47 Murph: A lot of people get stuck in palimpsests.

0:52:50 Ally: What does it say? Object?

0:52:53 Siobhan: “Easiest object in which to magically trap an opponent.”

0:52:55 Murph: Palimpsest, right?

0:52:56 Zac: A palimpsest is a gem, though?

0:52:58 Siobhan: A palimpsest is a gem.

0:53:00 Zac: Maybe just a gem. A gem?

0:53:02 Brennan: That is correct!

0:53:05 Ally: Stamp that twice!

0:53:06 Brennan: How about it? Stamp it twice, baby.

0:53:09 Zac: How many times? One more? Okay!

0:53:09 Ally: One more time! One more time! Can we get another pitcher for the table, please?

0:53:17 Brennan: We're gonna roll in front of the board, this time with a d6. That is a three. Everyone regains a 3rd level or lower spell slot.

0:53:24 Ally: So sick.

0:53:24 Siobhan: Hell, yes.

0:53:25 Brennan: Everybody regains a 3rd level or lower.

0:53:26 Lou: Would absolutely love to get a 3rd level spell back.

0:53:29 Siobhan: Okay, so, what I am thinking, gang, is that we need to reorganize where we are sitting on this fucking battle map, so I would like to cast Scatter. I can move up to five creatures up to 120 feet away from where they are.

0:53:44 Murph: Yes.

0:53:44 Zac: Whoa!

0:53:45 Siobhan: So what I'm thinking is I move our dude over here up to the top of that fucking tower.

0:53:52 Brennan: Okay.

0:53:52 Siobhan: That one over there. And the second person I will move is Moggy the Doggy, so he moves with him.

0:53:59 Murph: You're moving the proctor?

0:54:00 Siobhan: Yeah.

0:54:00 Murph: That's awesome.

0:54:01 Siobhan: I'm gonna move Fabian out of being grappled to wherever you wanna go. [Fabian whimpering]

0:54:09 Siobhan: And I'm gonna move Riz and Kristen, because they are right next to this guy, to wherever they wanna go to.

0:54:15 Brennan: You can also do it to unwilling creatures. They just get a save.

0:54:17 Siobhan: I know.

0:54:18 Brennan: Cool, amazing. So you're gonna move… So, the first thing that happens is you move Gavin Pundle to the top of this tower. Shwoom!

0:54:27 Ally: He's super bloodied. [screams]

0:54:31 Brennan: You see he appears and goes-

0:54:32 Siobhan: You can reach him with Healing Word, right?

0:54:33 Ally: Let me double check. I think it's 60.

0:54:34 Emily: I think I can fly and do Healing Word.

0:54:36 Siobhan: Oh, okay, great. Yeah, maybe you can just kinda hang out with him.

0:54:39 Emily: Yeah.

0:54:39 Brennan: Where do you wanna move Fabian?

0:54:41 Siobhan: Where do you wanna move? Do you wanna stay near to this guy?

0:54:43 Lou: No, absolutely not.

0:54:44 Siobhan: Or do you wanna just move up here?

0:54:45 Lou: I think either near—

0:54:45 Siobhan: You can also move up here, if you wanna attack the shrimp dragon.

0:54:49 Lou: I feel like I'll go before the shrimp dragon.

0:54:52 Siobhan: Great, you wanna just move up to here?

0:54:54 Lou: Yeah, I guess I'll go fight the shrimp dragon.

0:54:56 Brennan: Hangman will be left there with the roper.

0:55:01 Ally: It's up to how many willing creatures?

0:55:03 Zac: Five.

0:55:03 Brennan: Five.

0:55:03 Siobhan: Five.

0:55:03 Murph: You can leave us. I can Disengage. Don't worry about me.

0:55:06 Siobhan: Oh, okay, then I'll bring the Hangman with Fabian.

0:55:10 Brennan: Cool, you both, boom, appear up next to the shrimp dragon.

0:55:13 Fabian: Hi, Fig.

0:55:13 Brennan: That's three out of five.

0:55:16 Siobhan: Kristen, do you wanna maybe move up to here?

0:55:19 Ally: Sure.

0:55:19 Siobhan: Does that make sense to you? And you can do AoEs and then heal our guy.

0:55:22 Ally: Yeah, next to Buddy, you think? Yeah, up there.

0:55:25 Siobhan: Yeah.

0:55:25 Brennan: You wanna get close?

0:55:26 Ally: Not next to Buddy, no.

0:55:26 Brennan: Cool, up here? Great. Kristen's up there, that guy's there. That's four of five?

0:55:31 Lou: Can I move near the umber hulk? I feel like the shrimp dragon—

0:55:32 Siobhan: Yeah, if you'd rather.

0:55:34 Lou: I feel like Gorgug and Fig have it covered.

0:55:36 Murph: Yeah, I wouldn’t mind—

0:55:37 Brennan: Shrimp dragon had to get right next to Fig to do its breath weapon the correct way, so it'll get hit by Spirit Guardians at the beginning of its next turn.

0:55:44 Lou: Can I go above the umber hulk?

0:55:46 Siobhan: You wanna go right here?

0:55:46 Murph: Yeah, that's great.

0:55:47 Lou: Boom.

0:55:47 Siobhan: Right here?

0:55:48 Ally: Now that I'm on plane with Buddy, can I do an Insight check now that I'm close?

0:55:52 Brennan: Yeah, yeah.

0:55:55 Ally: Okay, that's 20, not nat.

0:55:57 Brennan: He looks over at you and says,

0:55:57 Buddy: This is remarkable.

0:55:59 Ally: He seems totally himself?

0:55:59 Brennan: Totally himself.

0:56:02 Siobhan: And I'm gonna cast True Strike, just so I have Dodge on me.

0:56:03 Brennan: Hell, yeah.

0:56:06 Lou: That was sick, dude.

0:56:08 Ally: So sick, so sick.

0:56:08 Siobhan: I'm gonna have this mephit, this mephit, and is this 15?

0:56:15 Brennan: That's all the people you're moving, correct?

0:56:16 Siobhan: Yeah, that's five.

0:56:16 Brennan: Cool.

0:56:19 Siobhan: This mephit and this mephit, and let me see if I get my breath weapon back. I don't, so this one doesn't have a breath weapon. So both of these are gonna try and blind these guys. They've got a DC 10 Dex.

0:56:33 Brennan: The roper and the umber hulk are making DC 10 Dex saves.

0:56:37 Zac: What was that spell called?

0:56:37 Lou: Scatter.

0:56:38 Siobhan: Dust mephit. Oh, Scatter is the spell.

0:56:41 Brennan: So first thing, actually, is I need the dust mephit, at the beginning of its turn, to make a Charisma saving throw.

0:56:49 Siobhan: Okay. Luckily, they're so charismatic. It gets a 17.

0:56:53 Zac: Wait, which one?

0:56:54 Brennan: Okay, you see the mephit goes,

0:56:56 Dust Mephit: Mistress, beware the eyes of the beast!

0:56:58 Brennan: And manages to cover its eyes. The umber hulk's weird, compound, insectile eyes shimmer with a captivating, enchanting glow, but your mephit resists it and can act. So it's a DC what Charisma save?

0:57:12 Siobhan: Dexterity save.

0:57:13 Brennan: Okay.

0:57:13 Siobhan: DC 10.

0:57:15 Brennan: Umber hulk makes it.

0:57:15 Siobhan: Okay.

0:57:16 Brennan: We're gonna roll for the roper. Roll for the roper.

0:57:18 Lou: I hate that name. [Zac laughs]

0:57:20 Brennan: The roper fails.

0:57:20 Siobhan: Great, it's blind.

0:57:23 Brennan: You see it has this weird eye hidden in this rocky eyelid that opens with a wet suction noise, and as it does, the dust mephit—

0:57:31 Ally: Everything about it is wrong.

0:57:32 Brennan: ...just goes [coughs] and blows more dust and sand. [screeches] Blinded.

0:57:38 Siobhan: Actually, it has a fly speed of 30, so it's just gonna move up and be in between Fig and the shrimp dragon.

0:57:45 Brennan: And the shrimp dragon. Hell, yes.

0:57:46 Emily: My hero!

0:57:48 Brennan: Incredible turn from Adaine Abernant, who literally has, so far this battle, been seated the entire time.

0:57:55 Siobhan: I'm just sitting at my desk, doodling.

0:57:57 Brennan: Being like... [mimics magic blasting violently]

0:57:58 Siobhan: I can grab your stuff out of your desk, if you want.

0:58:01 Zac: That'd be great.

0:58:01 Brennan: Incredible. I think there's a boom of light as suddenly, everyone is scattered across the battlefield.

0:58:09 Ally: We just have two tests left? We've taken 10?

0:58:11 Murph: We just have—

0:58:11 Lou: We've taken 10 questions.

0:58:14 Emily: When this guy hit me, could I have Hellish Rebuked him?

0:58:17 Brennan: Oh, is the word of that an attack, or just damage?

0:58:21 Emily: A creature that has damaged you.

0:58:22 Brennan: You would be able to Hellish Rebuke.

0:58:24 Emily: Why not try it?

0:58:24 Brennan: Give it a shot.

0:58:26 Lou: Hell, yeah.

0:58:27 Emily: Yeah, I'll do a 3rd level Hellish Rebuke.

0:58:28 Zac: Hellish. Lou/Ally: Hellish!

0:58:31 Emily: Hellish. Whoa, that's better than I've rolled for anything. 24 damage.

0:58:34 Ally: Wow!

0:58:36 Brennan: Fig, describe to me what your Hellish Rebuke looks like when it destroys this shrimp dragon.

0:58:40 Murph: Yeah!

0:58:40 Siobhan: Yes!

0:58:41 Emily: I open my mouth, and daylight comes out.

0:58:46 Brennan: You guys smell incredible roast shrimp.

0:58:48 Zac: How many lumens is that?

0:58:50 Brennan: It smells so—

0:58:51 Murph: Oh wow.

0:58:51 Lou: I'm hungry. I did not eat breakfast this morning.

0:58:54 Ally: Is that lemon and pepper flakes?

0:58:57 Zac: It smells, the butter—

0:58:57 Ally: Oh, it's the butter.

0:58:59 Siobhan: How did you make it smell of butter?

0:59:01 Emily: Ever since I rode that buttered ramp, I smell like butter.

0:59:05 Ally: Yeah, you just have a pat of it on you at all times.

0:59:06 Siobhan: Everything is kinda buttery.

0:59:07 Emily: It's like when you work at Subway Sandwiches.

0:59:09 Brennan: Incredible.

0:59:10 Siobhan: Just the bread smell ingrained in your skin.

0:59:13 Ally: Bread and mustard for the rest of your life.

0:59:15 Brennan: Wow, wow, wow. You guys are making mincemeat. It's the manticore's turn. It stumbles in an alien world, getting in touch with the power of mystery.

0:59:22 Lou: Sick.

0:59:22 Brennan: Sick! And we are back to Riz Gukgak. You see the alarms start once again. Gavin says,

0:59:28 Gavin Pundle: Wave three incoming.

0:59:30 Brennan: [mimics klaxon blaring]

0:59:33 Fabian: We still have the umber hulk!

0:59:34 Ally: We have two biggies left!

0:59:34 Fabian: And the roper!

0:59:36 Emily: Wait, which biggies? Oh, yeah.

0:59:39 Lou: The roper.

0:59:39 Siobhan: And this fucking mimic.

0:59:41 Murph: Why don't—

0:59:41 Ally: That mimic is really funny.

0:59:44 Murph: Okay, I'm gonna have to probably use a thing to disengage. Gorgug, you want me to grab your thing now?

0:59:47 Lou: Oh, the fucking blobs!

0:59:51 Zac: If you can.

0:59:52 Murph: Okay, I think I can. Great. Gorgug, where is your desk?

0:59:56 Brennan: This one. That's Gorgug.

0:59:56 Murph: Okay, cool.

0:59:59 Zac: Adaine said she could get it, if you don't wanna go for it.

1:00:02 Brennan: I think we need to get two anyway. Well, first things first, I'll go after the umber hulk with the Sword of Shadows.

1:00:08 Brennan: Okay. Actually, sorry, first things first—

1:00:11 Murph: I think after the first scare and the dust mephits yelling, wouldn't I not look?

1:00:18 Brennan: Unless surprised, a creature can avert its eyes to avoid the saving throw-

1:00:22 Murph: I can't be surprised.

1:00:22 Brennan: ...at the start of its turn. If the creature does so, it can't see the umber hulk until the start of its next turn, when it can avert its eyes again. If the creature looks at the umber hulk in the meantime, it must immediately make the save. So your choice, you can attack with disadvantage by averting your eyes from looking at it.

1:00:40 Ally: What about being behind it? 'Cause he's totally—

1:00:41 Brennan: Because its eyes are so large and bulbous on its head, it just swivels its head around to try to—

1:00:45 Zac: Aren't they just filled with dust and closed?

1:00:49 N: I have really bad Charisma and shit, so I'm not even gonna fuck with this guy. I say bye.

1:00:55 Fabian: The Ball, where are you going?

1:00:57 Riz: Your guy!

1:00:57 Murph: I'm going to Disengage.

1:01:01 Brennan: “Your guy”?

1:01:03 Murph: Yeah, I'm gonna Disengage and go over to—

1:01:06 Brennan: So you avert your eyes. Free action. Disengage, run over here. So you've bonus action Disengaged, awesome.

1:01:13 Fabian: Of course The Ball chooses school.

1:01:17 Brennan: Object interaction, you look into Gorgug's desk. You see Biology and Mathematics.

1:01:21 Riz: Biology or Mathematics?

1:01:22 Gorgug: Both pretty bad. Math.

1:01:25 Riz: Let's go math.

1:01:26 Brennan: You toss math up to Gorgug.

1:01:29 Zac: Hell. Absolute hell.

1:01:31 Siobhan: Long division.

1:01:31 Brennan: This is a two minute exam.

1:01:35 Ally: Read it out loud and we'll write it down.

1:01:36 Brennan: Get ready to read it out. Begin.

1:01:39 Zac: “Two trains are driving towards one another on the same track. The first train leaves Elmville at 5:05 AM traveling at 60 miles per hour. The second train leaves Bastion City, 135 miles away, at 5:30 AM traveling at 70 miles per hour. What is the exact time the collision will occur?”

1:01:59 Siobhan: What's the distance between those two places? Lou/Ally: 135.

1:02:01 Emily: 135? Okay.

1:02:02 Lou: 25 minutes.

1:02:03 Zac: 5:05 is the starting time for one, and then 5:30 the other.

1:02:06 Emily: So at 6:05, the guy will be 60 miles.

1:02:11 Zac: So it's 60 miles per hour. I don't honestly know how to do this.

1:02:15 Lou: What's 60 divided by 5?

1:02:15 Siobhan: 30. No, what?

1:02:19 Emily: Wait, 60 divided by five?

1:02:20 Siobhan: No, 12. It's 12. Oh my god.

1:02:22 Emily: I thought you said 30 divided by five.

1:02:23 Siobhan: Yeah.

1:02:25 Zac: How do y'all feel about this? Brennan smiles.

1:02:27 Ally: Good, good, good, good, good!

1:02:29 Siobhan: Yeah, let's see how we do.

1:02:32 Emily: I'm just not even gonna do it. I don't have any interest.

1:02:37 Siobhan: I just can't do this kind of math. If it was just—

1:02:40 Ally: What was the final question? What time do they meet? Zac/Siobhan: What is the exact time of the collision?

1:02:46 Emily: If I roll a nat 20, can I just be right?

1:02:47 Lou: It’s just under 6–

1:02:49 Ally: Yes!

1:02:49 Lou: It's just under 6:30.

1:02:51 Ally: No, it's just over 6:30.

1:02:52 Lou: Just over 6:30?

1:02:52 Ally: Yes.

1:02:53 Lou: Yes, you're right. Just over 6:30.

1:02:55 Siobhan: The exact time.

1:02:55 Murph: It's over 6:30?

1:02:57 Ally: It's just over 6:30, because then—

1:02:59 Zac: What is the exact time? Should I say 6:30?

1:03:00 Ally: No, because then, no no no, you're right, it's just under 6:30.

1:03:03 Lou: One second.

1:03:05 Ally: 'Cause they left earlier.

1:03:05 Lou: Yes.

1:03:07 Ally: 6:05, so it's somewhere between—

1:03:10 Murph: Should we take the pass on this one? Staring at the timer, Siobhan stamps the paper.

1:03:12 Emily: Pass. We took it.

1:03:12 Murph: Nice.

1:03:14 Brennan: Took the pass with the sand running out. Gorgug, you get it, and you've used your second pass. Whatever this next one is, you will not have an academic resource to know. You know intuitively, all you've been doing is artificer equations all the time. You know that the trains will meet at 6:20 AM and 46 seconds.

1:03:30 Siobhan: Oh my god.

1:03:33 Ally: We would've had to have done seconds.

1:03:35 Zac: Of course! Of course!

1:03:35 Ally: Wouldn't have gotten there. Holy shit. Holy shit.

1:03:39 Lou: It was five on the hour.

1:03:42 Brennan: The longer you guys didn't take mathematics, I was like, there is one that I designed for the pass in mind. Literally, the character's been studying engineering, and we're all comedians.

1:03:56 Zac: Thank you for trying. I had no hope.

1:03:58 Ally: Oh my god.

1:03:59 Brennan: Whatever this last one is, there is no academic resource left. It must be solved by you.

1:04:04 Siobhan: And we have to pass everything?

1:04:06 Brennan: You have to pass everything.

1:04:08 Murph: Yeah, we just have one more.

1:04:08 Siobhan: Okay.

1:04:09 Murph: Let's see what we've got here. 5, 10.

1:04:11 Siobhan: Oh no. You know what it's gonna be?

1:04:12 Zac: Biology?

1:04:13 Siobhan: It's gonna be a sex question. It's gonna be about docking.

1:04:17 Lou: You know it's gonna be about docking. You know the school's gonna ask us about docking.

1:04:22 Zac: What are they gonna ask other than, what is docking?

1:04:24 Ally: They're gonna say, how good does docking feel? [players laugh]

1:04:28 Lou: Be real right now.

1:04:28 Brennan: Be real. Okay.

1:04:30 Zac: A million. [Ally laughs]

1:04:32 Murph: And I'm going to, is there anything else—

1:04:35 Brennan: I will say, by the way—

1:04:35 Murph: Oh, wait, actually—

1:04:37 Brennan: Riz, I will say, you have automatic advantage on the roper because it is blinded.

1:04:42 Emily: Ooh!

1:04:42 Brennan: Just throwing that out.

1:04:44 Murph: Okay, so then I will take an attack on the roper.

1:04:48 Brennan: Okay.

1:04:48 Lou: Yeah!

1:04:51 Ally: Damn, we were circling that.

1:04:52 Lou: It was annoying.

1:04:53 Ally: It would have been devastating to say 6:20, though, and have finally gotten to there, and gotten it wrong 'cause of the 40 seconds, so I'm so glad we stamped.

1:05:01 Zac: I've maybe never known how to do that.

1:05:03 Siobhan: Yeah, I—

1:05:03 Ally: But no.

1:05:06 Lou: Listen to that bag of bricks.

1:05:07 Brennan: Did you hit—

1:05:07 Murph: Yeah.

1:05:09 Ally: Bag of bricks!

1:05:09 Brennan: Cool.

1:05:10 Murph: 35 damage.

1:05:10 Brennan: 35 damage to the roper. It is looking fucked up.

1:05:17 Murph: Okay, then I will prepare a reaction to shoot it if it moves.

1:05:25 Brennan: Hell, yes. [mimics klaxon blaring] I'm gonna roll a d4 in front of the board. I'll let you all know, Fabian, you've already delayed your initiative past when monsters appear. This is going to be a d4. You want a three exactly. That's a one.

1:05:46 Lou: That's not a three.

1:05:48 Brennan: I'm gonna need a Dexterity saving throw from Fig.

1:05:53 Emily: 16.

1:05:53 Brennan: Remember to add Bless.

1:05:55 Emily: Oh, yeah!

1:05:55 Lou: Let it rip.

1:05:58 Emily: 18.

1:05:59 Brennan: Okay, you pull up on your steed. We're gonna describe what happens in a second. Erupting from over the roper is a full wyvern [screeches] that takes to the sky. Go ahead—

1:06:07 Siobhan: I'm not scared of him. You know why, Brennan?

1:06:09 Brennan: Why?

1:06:11 Siobhan: He's 'armless.

1:06:11 Brennan: [snorts] Oh no.

1:06:16 Gorgug: Adaine, what'd you say?

1:06:16 Adaine: I said he's 'armless!

1:06:18 Fabian: You're gonna be the first to die, Adaine.

1:06:20 Adaine: I don't think so.

1:06:22 Brennan: Odds or evens?

1:06:23 Emily: Okay.

1:06:25 Brennan: Eight.

1:06:25 Emily: Evens.

1:06:26 Brennan: Wyvern clocks this guy right up here and begins to take wing after him.

1:06:29 Emily: Okay.

1:06:29 Brennan: We're then gonna move. Out of this side thing over here, a crab man. He comes out and goes,

1:06:37 Crab Man: Crab man!

1:06:37 Brennan: At the top of his lungs.

1:06:41 Zac: No, no.

1:06:41 Murph: You're running out of ideas.

1:06:46 Siobhan: You had a shrimp dragon and a crab man?

1:06:49 Brennan: Bursting from this back one over here, rust monsters.

1:06:53 Zac: Nice.

1:06:57 Lou: Oh, is that a projectile it's shooting?

1:06:59 Brennan: Yes, it's barfing acid up in a big line.

1:07:04 Zac: Oh, that's too many.

1:07:04 Ally: That's probably too many. No, no, you don't need any more.

1:07:08 Zac: I think that was already too many units.

1:07:10 Lou: Brennan, you can stop.

1:07:10 Ally: [firmly] That's enough! [Lou cracks up]

1:07:14 Brennan: “That's enough, dude!” Galloping behind the wyvern as well, out past the roper, you see a creature. [Siobhan gasps]

1:07:24 Emily: A pentacorn! I almost made this my Find Greater Steed. How convenient it would have been!

1:07:31 Brennan: A pentacorn. It would have… I'm glad you didn't, 'cause it would have robbed me of an enemy in this battle when we would have needed to use the mini. A beautiful, 20-legged pentacorn with five glorious horns.

1:07:45 Emily: She's gorgeous.

1:07:45 Siobhan: Truly maybe the most beautiful mini I've ever seen.

1:07:46 Ally: Yeah, that's really cool.

1:07:49 Brennan: You see all the Agueforts all take a moment and go,

1:07:53 Agueforts: For you, Figueroth Faeth, we have made this creature, after long months of toil.

1:08:00 Emily: Finally! I get off and get onto it.

1:08:03 Brennan: I get off and get onto the pentacorn.

1:08:05 Murph: You imagined it just having five HP, right?

1:08:06 Brennan: What you dodge, avoiding all damage, is the eruption of the gate underneath you as a purple worm [screeches] [players screaming]

1:08:16 Brennan: Comes roiling out of the debris.

1:08:19 Emily: Thank you for the Bless!

1:08:19 Brennan: I'm gonna move you back as this purple worm appears, destroying the rats.

1:08:25 Lou: No! Their livelihood!

1:08:27 Murph: See? They should've fought for their livelihood.

1:08:28 Lou: The small business they created!

1:08:30 Brennan: The rust monsters automatically don't see him. Give me a roll for the crab man.

1:08:35 Emily: Crab man thinks I'm—

1:08:35 Brennan: Crab man thinks it's you. Give me a roll for the pentacorn. Pentacorn clocks Gavin. Give me a roll for the purple worm.

1:08:47 Emily: Purple worm thinks I'm him.

1:08:47 Brennan: Thinks you're Gavin, okay. Purple worm thinks it's you.

1:08:52 Zac: [pointing at the purple worm] This thing's super strong, right?

1:08:53 Murph: It's so good.

1:08:53 Emily: It's so bad. It's so bad.

1:08:56 Brennan: Purple worm and pentacorn, or rather, the only ones that believe it's Gavin, I believe, are the wyvern—

1:09:01 Murph: These two over here.

1:09:02 Brennan: Yeah, those two over there have clocked the real Gavin. Everybody else assumes it's Fig.

1:09:06 Ally: And only this one can fly.

1:09:08 Emily: I feel like I have to go after the wyvern, 'cause I can fly.

1:09:08 Murph: Yeah.

1:09:09 Ally: Definitely.

1:09:11 Brennan: Fabian, it is your turn to act as these new monsters appear on the field.

1:09:14 Fabian: Do we need to die before they can kill Gavin? Is that a thing?

1:09:17 Emily: Is that true?

1:09:18 Gorgug: We gotta get this last question first.

1:09:20 Fabian: Oh yes, we have to get the question. We can think about dying later.

1:09:23 Emily: Do we have to die?

1:09:23 Brennan: You've heard mixed things. You've heard that no one has ever survived the test before.

1:09:29 Fig: Let's kill all the monsters, and then if we feel like we're gonna fail, we can kill each other.

1:09:34 Riz: Why don't we just try to protect him at all costs, and worry about that later?

1:09:38 Fabian: I just wanna be considering our options!

1:09:39 Ally: You hear me shout,

1:09:39 Kristen: Maybe!

1:09:39 Gorgug: I'll cut off my head.

1:09:41 Fig: I'm just saying, I call Fabian. I call Fabian.

1:09:43 Brennan: All right, yeah.

1:09:43 Fabian: What?

1:09:44 Brennan: Fabian, that is you.

1:09:46 Lou: Do I, because of my immunity to being Charmed, do I get the sense I can look into the umber hulk's eyes?

1:09:51 Brennan: Give me Insight. Give me a DC 20 Insight.

1:09:55 Lou: I didn't get that.

1:09:57 Brennan: You don't know. You don't know if it would work.

1:10:00 Lou: Then I'm gonna look it dead in its eye.

1:10:02 Brennan: Give me a Charisma saving throw.

1:10:04 Lou: Okay.

1:10:04 Brennan: You roll Bless with this.

1:10:06 Lou: I'm excited about what I'm seeing on these dice. How do you feel about… How do you feel about a 13?

1:10:12 Brennan: I don't feel great about it. On a failed saving throw, you cannot take reactions until the start of your next turn. Roll a d8.

1:10:22 Lou: Eight.

1:10:22 Murph: You have Confusion, maybe.

1:10:25 Brennan: On a seven or eight, the creature makes one melee attack against a random creature, or does nothing if no creature is within reach. Well, so, you look down at the umber hulk. You gotta roll a d20. Evens is umber hulk, odd is Hangman.

1:10:40 Siobhan: Those dust mephits are also there. They're not dead yet.

1:10:43 Brennan: But they are down on the ground, out of reach for Fabian. It's about Fabian—

1:10:46 Siobhan: Oh, it's about Fabian.

1:10:48 Murph: Fabian has Confuse. He has to roll to randomly—

1:10:51 Lou: Even?

1:10:51 Brennan: Even is umber hulk.

1:10:53 Lou: Okay, thank god.

1:10:54 Brennan: Cool, so the umber hulk whips around and goes [chittering] and its eyes ripple and make you feel strange and confused. You see the umber hulk in a maroon velvet suit, dancing through an old diner.

1:11:09 Fabian: Ew. Velvet is so tacky!

1:11:14 Brennan: [grunts] And you just stab. It picked the wrong fabric for a very rich kid.

1:11:17 Lou: There it is.

1:11:18 Brennan: Go ahead, but you're only gonna make one weapon attack.

1:11:20 Lou: Great.

1:11:20 Ally: Get it.

1:11:24 Lou: That's not bad. How do we feel about 32?

1:11:27 Brennan: 32 is absolutely gonna do it. Go ahead and roll damage.

1:11:29 Lou: Great. We'll make it a Trip attack. DC 17 Strength saving throw. Oh, no, excuse me, I'm out of those. I'm way out of those.

1:11:38 Brennan: No, no worries. Okay, great.

1:11:39 Lou: But I will throw a Bardic to make it a Defensive Flourish.

1:11:43 Brennan: Cool.

1:11:44 Lou: Defensive Flourish, the attack itself, and we'll put a 1st level spell on this.

1:11:49 Brennan: Hell, yeah.

1:11:51 Lou: 8, 15, plus 9, 24 points of damage.

1:11:55 Brennan: Woo! This umber hulk confuses you, and you stab it right in one of its eyes and it goes [screeches] and goes from being injured to bloodied. It is fucked up by that attack. But you only get one weapon attack, 'cause you're under the Confused condition.

1:12:12 Lou: Great. Can I do other things? Or is that the end of my actions?

1:12:15 Brennan: On a failed save, the creature can't take reactions for the next turn, rolls d8 to determine what it does during that turn. So no, your turn is done. One weapon attack.

1:12:21 Murph: How do you break it? Just by breaking Concentration?

1:12:26 Brennan: So, it's an effect that only lasts for that turn, so you come out of it at the end of your turn. It's basically just fucking with your turn 'cause of its weird, crazy eyes.

1:12:34 Lou: Great.

1:12:36 Brennan: That's Fabian. Mimic is going to go.

1:12:39 Lou: Hangman's gonna try—

1:12:39 Brennan: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

1:12:41 Lou: ...to recharge breath weapon.

1:12:43 Brennan: Let's see if he recharges.

1:12:44 Lou: He does not.

1:12:44 Brennan: Okay.

1:12:46 Lou: Can he bite it from there?

1:12:46 Brennan: He can try to bite it, but he's gonna have to do the same Charisma saving throw.

1:12:50 Lou: Oh, he has to look at it. Can he do it blind?

1:12:53 Brennan: He can do it blind. He can take disadvantage.

1:12:54 Fabian: Close your eyes, Hangman!

1:12:54 Brennan: All right.

1:13:00 Lou: How do you feel about an 11?

1:13:01 Brennan: Not great.

1:13:01 Lou: Okay.

1:13:03 Brennan: We move to the mimic's turn. This thing has just been chewing on Adaine for so long. He's gonna make another attack.

1:13:12 Siobhan: And I have Dodge on.

1:13:12 Brennan: You have Dodge on. That's disadvantage, so I can't keep the 19 I just rolled. And instead, I keep the four. That's so sad for me. You honestly are moving your… You see everything this mimic is ever going to do. Its path in the pattern of fate is so familiar to you that it just cannot get a bite in. That's the mimic's turn. Roper is going to go. Roper is gonna—

1:13:37 Lou: Ew.

1:13:39 Siobhan: That guy is still fucking there.

1:13:40 Brennan: Still blinded. Does it roll again at the end of its turn?

1:13:43 Siobhan: Great question. Yes, at the end of its turn.

1:13:46 Murph: Okay, it moves. I shoot it.

1:13:46 Emily: Yeah!

1:13:49 Lou: Shoot it!

1:13:53 Murph: Yeah, 28 to hit.

1:13:55 Brennan: 28 hits.

1:13:57 Lou: Baby, baby!

1:13:59 Emily: Go for the purple worm. I got, I think, the wyvern. At least I've got him again with Spirit Guardians—

1:14:06 Murph: 26 damage on that one.

1:14:08 Brennan: With 17 hit points left. [holds up a paper]

1:14:08 Emily: Yeah!

1:14:10 Brennan: This thing was about to send, its reach, with its tendrils, is 60 feet.

1:14:14 Lou: Oh my god. Gross.

1:14:14 Brennan: Even with disadvantage… And by the way, the only reason it didn't tangle up everybody last turn was Fabian's Goading Attack. So Riz, as this thing goes to hit you, Adaine, everything across the field, blinded or not, tendrils flying, you raise up and, vwoom! Right in the slit of its eye, this nictating membrane opens, and it's enough for you to put a bullet through its eye into its brain. The roper is dead.

1:14:43 Fabian: Hell yes, The Ball.

1:14:43 Brennan: Done. Goodbye. Just a big pile of monsters on this battlefield. That's your reaction. Crab man!

1:14:51 Lou: Ew.

1:14:51 Brennan: What's up, crab man?

1:14:53 Murph: He thinks Fig is the proctor, right?

1:14:56 Brennan: It thinks Fig is the proctor. So it's gonna go 5, 10, 15, 20.

1:15:03 Emily: That's difficult terrain.

1:15:04 Brennan: 25, 30, up here, but it's got the reach. It's gonna go for Fabian. What's your armor class?

1:15:10 Lou: I think a four, so that's currently 23.

1:15:13 Brennan: Okay, it hits.

1:15:16 Zac: Crab man?

1:15:17 Fabian: I know the Crab King, and you're nowhere as strong as him.

1:15:20 Brennan: Hits and crits.

1:15:22 Murph: Silvery Barbs. Oh wait, no, no more reactions.

1:15:24 Brennan: 17 points of damage, and you are grappled as this crab man hits you.

1:15:29 Fabian: Oh, god! Let go of me!

1:15:30 Adaine: Fabian, stop hugging the bad guys!

1:15:32 Fabian: I know I'm beautiful, but Jesus!

1:15:33 Brennan: So Fabian, in his confused state, gets grabbed by this crab man. Figueroth Faeth, this is your turn as this purple worm... [gurgles]

1:15:42 Emily: We wanna get out of here and close with the wyvern.

1:15:46 Brennan: Okay, you don't need to take Disengage if your steed takes Disengage.

1:15:48 Emily: My steed takes Disengage.

1:15:50 Brennan: Okay, cool, but it is a close call. That purple worm, chomp! As your Daymare flies out of there. You get to the wyvern.

1:15:59 Emily: I had used my final Luck point on a Concentration check that I had actually already made.

1:16:06 Brennan: You may have it back.

1:16:06 Emily: I can have it back.

1:16:07 Brennan: Yes, you may.

1:16:07 Emily: Okay, if that's the case, guys, is there any point in me trying to just attack this guy?

1:16:14 Murph: Yeah.

1:16:14 Siobhan: Yeah, why not?

1:16:15 Ally: Definitely. Fireball?

1:16:15 Murph: No, her Smite.

1:16:17 Emily: No, I was gonna try and—

1:16:17 Brennan: Smite?

1:16:19 Emily: Attack. I just think that's—

1:16:19 Lou: Hell, yeah.

1:16:21 Murph: Yeah, you have Bless, right?

1:16:22 Brennan: This wyvern will be quickly able to cross the battlefield.

1:16:26 Emily: I know, I know. Well, no matter what, he's in my Spirit Guardians, and his speed will be halved.

1:16:31 Brennan: Yeah.

1:16:36 Lou: Let it rip!

1:16:38 Emily: I'm gonna use the Luck point.

1:16:42 Brennan: Okay.

1:16:42 Zac: Here we go, here we go.

1:16:46 Emily: Okay, that's definitely, probably gonna hit. That's a 27 to hit.

1:16:50 Brennan: 27 hits.

1:16:50 Emily: Okay.

1:16:52 Brennan: And you don't have Extra Attack, correct?

1:16:53 Emily: No.

1:16:53 Brennan: No, okay.

1:16:54 Emily: I do, though, have a 2d6 extra acid from taking that damage.

1:16:58 Brennan: Yes, you do.

1:17:00 Emily: This is the first time it's ever come into play.

1:17:01 Ally: Nice.

1:17:03 Lou: Oh, it absorbed into the bass?

1:17:04 Siobhan: And you have Smites still?

1:17:04 Emily: Yeah.

1:17:07 Siobhan: So actually, you didn't get that. You got a crit. [Brennan cackling] [players cheering]

1:17:13 Brennan: So we're doubling, oh my god, doubling acid damage and doubling crit damage.

1:17:17 Emily: Okay, so then that becomes 10d8 for the Smite, plus 4d8 for the Booming Blade, plus 2d8 for my bass, plus 4d6 for the acid. And then will that also, the Booming Blade, then he'll take extra damage if he moves?

1:17:42 Siobhan: Yeah. He takes an extra 4d8.

1:17:42 Emily: For that Smite? Okay. I'm rolling it on here.

1:17:48 Brennan: Oh my fucking god!

1:17:50 Emily: That is 87 points of damage.

1:17:54 Lou: Beautiful.

1:17:54 Ally: “You guys, should I attack? I don't know if I should attack.” [laughs]

1:17:57 Emily: I mean, it wouldn't have looked like that without Adaine.

1:18:01 Brennan: Siobhan and Emily, describe for me what the use of a critical hit in a Portent looks like, and then what happens to this wyvern as it's still up, but you have moved it from uninjured to death's door, and it has to contend with a Booming Blade and Spirit Guardians.

1:18:15 Emily: And Spirit Guardians. I think I look at Adaine and say,

1:18:20 Fig: I think I shouldn't have taken these paladin levels.

1:18:22 Adaine: Are you crazy?

1:18:22 Siobhan: And I basically superimpose a rifle target onto the most vulnerable part of the wyvern.

1:18:33 Fig: All right, I'll give it a try. [screams powerfully] [players laugh]

1:18:36 Brennan: You all see, the sky is filled with moons, the green, sickening clouds part in this strange realm, and a new day dawns as the sky fills with fiery horses. Pow!

1:18:51 Emily: My god.

1:18:53 Brennan: Unbelievable. I can't believe I'm gonna ask this. Any bonus actions from Fig?

1:18:58 Emily: Yeah, since that's only a cantrip, I'm gonna heal Fabian.

1:19:00 Brennan: Hell, yeah.

1:19:03 Fabian: Ah, thank you! Incredible!

1:19:06 Emily: I'm gonna do, let me see, I'm gonna do a 3rd level Healing Word.

1:19:11 Brennan: Here we go.

1:19:14 Emily: 14.

1:19:14 Lou: Dreamy.

1:19:15 Brennan: 14 hit points healed, Fig astride this massive Daymare, fiery rage, rebellion, justice, boom! Gorgug Thistlespring, that is your turn.

1:19:26 Zac: Wow, okay. Go into a rage. Bonus action, go into a rage. I look at the purple worm like,

1:19:31 Gorgug: What's up, man?

1:19:36 Zac: I'm just gonna take two attacks at it from here.

1:19:39 Brennan: Here you go. [dice rolling]

1:19:43 Zac: Does a 22 hit?

1:19:46 Brennan: 22 hits.

1:19:47 Zac: Okay, and then my second attack. [dice rolling] Nat 20.

1:19:51 Brennan: Oh my god.

1:19:51 Emily: Oh my god!

1:19:55 Brennan: Oh my fucking god.

1:19:56 Ally: Wow! When you got it, you got it!

1:19:58 Siobhan: He got it.

1:19:58 Ally: You got it, you got it. That hasn't even rolled well this whole season, too.

1:20:04 Brennan: This fight is the most badass this adventuring party has ever been. As Fig Smites this wyvern to within an inch of death, quite likely to just die at the beginning of its turn, the purple worm, having missed Fig, turns. Saliva.

1:20:22 Zac: I'm just spinning.

1:20:24 Brennan: It rears back. As it lunges, Gorgug knocks it out of the air, and it goes prone underneath his axe.

1:20:32 Siobhan: Hell, yeah, dude. Sit down! You're freaking rocking the boat, my guy.

1:20:37 Zac: This is cocked. All right.

1:20:40 Lou: Buck nasty, dude.

1:20:44 Zac: 29 plus 16.

1:20:47 Lou: Mayor of crit city over here.

1:20:48 Zac: 29 plus 16?

1:20:48 Brennan: 45.

1:20:50 Zac: 45.

1:20:50 Brennan: You deal 45 damage and knock this purple worm prone. This massive monstrosity hits the deck.

1:20:58 Zac: I'm really teeing up right here. I'm hitting dingers.

1:21:04 Brennan: Unbelievable. Any bonus actions?

1:21:06 Zac: I raged.

1:21:06 Brennan: You raged. Yep yep yep.

1:21:08 Zac: I'm gonna move over here.

1:21:11 Fabian: Hey, what's up, Gorgug?

1:21:11 Gorgug: Hey, how's it going?

1:21:14 Fabian: I'm all right. I saw you knocked down that purple worm. I'm gonna get out of this crab in a second. You just watch.

1:21:20 Gorgug: You want me... Okay, I'll watch.

1:21:22 Fabian: No, I don't want help. I'm good.

1:21:23 Brennan: Now the rust monsters are going to go.

1:21:27 Ally: Ooh.

1:21:29 Zac: What are they?

1:21:30 Brennan: They have a speed of 40.

1:21:32 Emily: They think I'm the proctor.

1:21:32 Ally: Oh, they do?

1:21:35 Emily: Yeah, 'cause they can't see him.

1:21:37 Ally: Oh, fuck, that's great.

1:21:39 Brennan: 5, 10, 15, 20, 25. Do they have a climb speed? They don't have a climb speed. They gotta find the stairs.

1:21:45 Lou: Gotta find the stairs.

1:21:47 Zac: Which are all the way over here.

1:21:48 Brennan: All the way over here!

1:21:48 Lou: Thanks, Rick.

1:21:51 Brennan: So, they're actually going to—

1:21:54 Lou: I paid Rick $450 to put the stairs on that side of the battlefield.

1:21:58 Siobhan: Money well spent.

1:21:58 Brennan: Okay.

1:22:00 Murph: Rick had a ladder right there.

1:22:01 Ally: Yeah.

1:22:01 Murph: Lou slipped him a 20.

1:22:03 Ally: Lou came in and flicked it off of the battle map.

1:22:06 Siobhan: And then just handed him a wad of cash.

1:22:08 Lou: I said, you don't tell anybody shit, Rick.

1:22:10 Brennan: Actually, they are gonna attack the...

1:22:12 Lou: Buy your wife some chicken tandoori.

1:22:14 Brennan: They are going to attack the mephits. What are the mephits' armor class?

1:22:19 Siobhan: 12.

1:22:20 Brennan: 12, okay. That's three hits. Let me know if our friend goes away. It takes five damage.

1:22:29 Zac: Oh, I forgot—

1:22:29 Brennan: Four damage.

1:22:30 Siobhan: Uh-huh.

1:22:30 Brennan: Five damage.

1:22:33 Siobhan: It's still up.

1:22:35 Brennan: Okay, more rust monsters are coming. Let's go. Two more.

1:22:38 Emily: Rust versus dust!

1:22:43 Brennan: A lust for dust. Two misses. They're all circling up on one mephit. Come on, rust monsters!

1:22:50 Zac: The chosen one.

1:22:52 Siobhan: This is such… [points at her card] This is really funny.

1:22:55 Brennan: Two more hits.

1:22:57 Siobhan: Great, so “when the mephit dies, it explodes in a burst of dust. Each creature within five feet of it must then succeed on a DC or be blinded for one minute.”

1:23:07 Lou: Does that include the umber hulk and the crab man?

1:23:09 Siobhan: It absolutely does.

1:23:09 Brennan: Oh no! [Ally and Murph clap]

1:23:12 Siobhan: Certainly the umber hulk.

1:23:13 Brennan: Oh no! You made a bunch of little bombs!

1:23:16 Siobhan: Yep.

1:23:17 Brennan: Oh god!

1:23:17 Ally: Oh my god!

1:23:19 Siobhan: They don't do any damage, but they fuck you up—

1:23:21 Ally: Battle of the Brands, baby, all over again.

1:23:24 Brennan: All over again.

1:23:24 Zac: Plinth city.

1:23:26 Brennan: Okay, so we're gonna roll for—

1:23:28 Siobhan: I had to read so many fucking mephit cards to find the good one.

1:23:31 Brennan: Okay, four of the rust monsters make it, and then two of them don't, so we'll go, these two with the spray are blinded.

1:23:43 Siobhan: Great.

1:23:44 Brennan: And then what we'll go ahead and do is, I'll roll in front of the board, and it's Constitution, correct?

1:23:49 Siobhan: It is Constitution, yeah.

1:23:51 Brennan: Okay.

1:23:51 Siobhan: DC 10.

1:23:52 Brennan: Umber hulk gets a plus three. Crab, also a plus three. So a seven or higher. We'll say this is umber hulk. Four, fails!

1:23:59 Ally: Oh my god!

1:24:01 Brennan: Umber hulk, blinded. 13, crab man makes it.

1:24:08 Ally: I can see!

1:24:11 Emily: The crab fans.

1:24:11 Brennan: Okay.

1:24:13 Ally: It's looking deep into your eyes.

1:24:14 Lou: Stop.

1:24:14 Brennan: Incredible.

1:24:17 Siobhan: So since the umber hulk is blinded, can it use its eye weapon?

1:24:21 Brennan: I am gonna say that we're gonna actually make that a roll of the die. But rules as written, no. But it just makes too much sense. So on evens, its eye function is gone. So you see your dust mephit looks up at you and goes... [coughs]

1:24:41 Adaine: Bye bye.

1:24:41 Dust Mephit: My queen!

1:24:44 Brennan: Dust everywhere.

1:24:44 Ally: That's all, folks.

1:24:47 Brennan: The umber hulk goes [screams] and these huge membranes cover its eyes as it tries to wipe dust out of it. The Confusion effect is no more. Okay, Kristen Applebees, that is your turn.

1:24:56 Ally: I will cast a 4th level Mass Healing Word. You need heals, right? Anybody else take any hits?

1:25:05 Siobhan: I'm good.

1:25:06 Emily: I mean, I would take a little bit.

1:25:07 Zac: I would take a little bit.

1:25:09 Ally: Okay, cool, then I'll do that.

1:25:11 Zac: Can you get the guy?

1:25:11 Ally: Yeah, yeah.

1:25:12 Zac: Okay.

1:25:12 Ally: Plus five, so let's see. Seven, nine, 10, 15, so 15 health to you.

1:25:24 Lou: Oh, thank you.

1:25:24 Ally: To this guy up here. And then I think it says that it's a bonus action, but so is Mass Healing Word, and I was wondering if you would allow me to reach into my pocket of my tracksuit and feel this disgusting Eye of the Vulture — [Siobhan gasps]

1:25:43 Brennan: Okay.

1:25:43 Ally: ...and eat it.

1:25:45 Brennan: Okay, you eat the Eye of the Vulture King.

1:25:47 Ally: Yeah, it gives me Truesight for one minute.

1:25:52 Brennan: Okay, you bonus action eat the Eye of the Vulture King.

1:25:56 Kristen: Oh my god! It's like a bad olive inside of a bad olive.

1:26:01 Brennan: I'm gonna say, 'cause it's a bonus action to cast that spell, but it is also a bonus action to cast that, I am going to say the effect of the eye will come at the beginning of your next turn, okay?

1:26:10 Ally: Okay.

1:26:10 Brennan: Cool.

1:26:12 Emily: I wanna see who this—

1:26:12 Lou: Who's Buddy?

1:26:16 Brennan: Gavin's looking almost back to full. He looks up at you and says,

1:26:17 Gavin Pundle: Okay.

1:26:19 Brennan: And writes something down in his book.

1:26:21 Zac: Back to full.

1:26:21 Ally: Yeah, anyone who needed it. It can be up to six people, so I don't think enough of us even need it.

1:26:28 Murph: You guys take it, I haven’t—

1:26:28 Siobhan: Fabian.

1:26:29 Lou: I took it.

1:26:32 Emily: I'll take it.

1:26:32 Brennan: So Kristen, after your turn, you're the only one who can see this. Both ochre jellies hear the teleportation from Adaine's Scatter, turn to each other and go

1:26:39 Ochre Jellies: [squeaky dejected sigh] [Siobhan laughs]

1:26:45 Brennan: And turn around to begin to walk back up. Spend their whole turn to go one, two, three, four. There you go. It's a long way.

1:26:55 Siobhan: A long way to eventually kill us.

1:26:56 Emily: Can we do a spinoff about these two?

1:26:57 Ally: Yeah, that's a side quest.

1:26:58 Emily: Can I play one of them?

1:26:58 Zac: Can we do a Pixar short?

1:27:04 Siobhan: A two episode mini quest.

1:27:06 Brennan: I believe you are out of range of the pentacorn's physical attacks. It rears up—

1:27:13 Emily: Oh, but if it's within 15 feet of me—

1:27:15 Brennan: Beginning of its turn. Yep, absolutely.

1:27:17 Emily: They'll do a Wisdom save.

1:27:19 Brennan: It hits a nat one on its Wisdom save.

1:27:20 Emily: 18 damage.

1:27:20 Ally: Nice!

1:27:22 Brennan: 18 damage from the red dust. The pentacorn rises up and hits you with Banishment.

1:27:30 Emily: I'm gonna, do I have it? Counterspell.

1:27:32 Brennan: Okay.

1:27:34 Emily: Wait, do I have a reaction? Yes, I do.

1:27:36 Brennan: You do have a reaction, okay. So you see this pentacorn tries to just one shot you and free up the wyvern.

1:27:42 Emily: I'm not even gonna try and save that.

1:27:43 Brennan: You knock it out from there, and you see—

1:27:46 Emily: I use a 6th level Counterspell.

1:27:48 Brennan: Hell, yeah, the pentacorn gears up, and you see it's going to begin to use some legendary actions. That's the purple worm. It is going to use half its movement to right itself.

1:28:00 Ally: Why?

1:28:01 Brennan: It can see where Gavin Pundle is, but it also knows who just humiliated it, and it is primal and rageful.

1:28:11 Zac: Me too.

1:28:12 Brennan: It's gonna make two attacks against Gorgug.

1:28:13 Zac: No, no!

1:28:13 Lou: You got this, Gorjudge.

1:28:16 Ally: Gorjudge!

1:28:16 Emily: Gorjudge.

1:28:18 Lou: Jorjuj.

1:28:18 Brennan: That is two hits on Gorgug. We'll resolve the tail stinger first. You take 18 piercing damage, halved to nine. Give me a Constitution saving throw.

1:28:32 Zac: Plus Bless, right?

1:28:32 Brennan: Yep.

1:28:35 Zac: So that's a 19.

1:28:38 Brennan: That just saves. You are still gonna take a ton of damage. You take 22, 28, 34, 41, 42, 51 points of poison damage halved to 25, which you cannot halve further.

1:29:01 Zac: Poison damage is halved, though?

1:29:03 Brennan: Yes, it's 25, but your rage won't cut it in half. So you take 25 points of damage. How's Gorgug looking?

1:29:09 Zac: Pretty good, honestly.

1:29:10 Brennan: Okay, so that is the poison damage you take. This thing is now gonna hit— it also hits you with a bite attack. This is the nasty one.

1:29:21 Zac: That's the nasty one?

1:29:24 Brennan: I'm gonna need a Dexterity saving throw. This is Box of Doom.

1:29:28 Ally: Come on, crit!

1:29:31 Emily: You know who to roll.

1:29:31 Lou: You know who to roll.

1:29:31 Ally: Hit the Bless first! Hit the Bless first!

1:29:34 Brennan: Yeah, hit 'em with the Bless first. That's a three. What do you add to Dexterity?

1:29:39 Zac: My Dex saving throw, I only add one.

1:29:42 Brennan: So four. You need one of these two dice to be a 15 or higher.

1:29:47 Ally: Okay.

1:29:47 Lou: All right.

1:29:51 Emily: Oh, that's a crit! That's a crit!

1:29:52 Brennan: That's a crit!

1:29:52 Ally: Oh my god!

1:29:53 Brennan: That is a fucking crit! Oh my god.

1:29:56 Ally: Is it the butt or the face? The butt or the face?

1:29:59 Emily: The most crits I've ever—

1:29:59 Ally: Yes, this is so crazy.

1:30:03 Zac: It's crit city, baby.

1:30:05 Brennan: You take 21 piercing damage, halved to 10. As the thing goes to swallow you and you literally leap, standing on its lower jaw, with a hand on its upper jaw, holding its mouth open. [roars]

1:30:18 Zac: So just 10?

1:30:19 Brennan: Just 10 piercing damage, or it would have swallowed you, and you would have vanished off the battlefield.

1:30:23 Emily: Jesus!

1:30:23 Zac: Okay.

1:30:26 Brennan: It would have swallowed you whole. That is going to be, okay, you need some Concentration checks on—

1:30:32 Zac: Wait, I actually don't have a Concentration spell.

1:30:34 Brennan: Okay, Cat's Grace is gone? Gotcha.

1:30:36 Zac: Yeah, I lost it when I dropped the rage.

1:30:38 Brennan: Yep, makes sense. Yep, yep, yep. That is the purple worm's turn. Umber hulk, blinded, is going to- It's gonna attack Fabian with disadvantage, actually. It's gonna just try to swing... No, but you're restrained. But I don't think that actually matters. You're not prone, so it's still gonna attack with disadvantage. That's a miss on Fabian. That's another miss on Fabian. Lou moves about dodging as Fabian.

1:31:03 Brennan: But you see, it's going to vanish into the earth and start burrowing.

1:31:07 Lou: No, come back!

1:31:11 Siobhan: Oh shit.

1:31:11 Zac: It's burrowing.

1:31:12 Emily: Really? That much movement?

1:31:12 Brennan: No, no, no.

1:31:14 Murph: It's just off the table.

1:31:14 Brennan: I'm moving it off the table, as you see it begin to burrow.

1:31:16 Ally: Yeah, I was like, what?

1:31:19 Brennan: So it starts to burrow. Adaine Abernant, that is your turn.

1:31:21 Siobhan: Okay, first of all, I'm gonna roll for these two dust mephits that I have left to see if they get their breath weapons back. That one does not, and that one does not. Okay. They both move out of opportunity attack range, purposefully—

1:31:39 Brennan: Yeah, minimum damage, so that one blows up next to the wyvern.

1:31:45 Siobhan: Great, so DC 10.

1:31:45 Brennan: Okay.

1:31:49 Siobhan: Constitution save for both of them.

1:31:50 Brennan: Pentacorn makes it. Wyvern might not make it. The DC is 10 and it's Constitution?

1:31:55 Siobhan: Yeah.

1:31:55 Brennan: Wyvern, blinded.

1:31:57 Murph: Nice.

1:31:57 Brennan: Unbelievable.

1:32:00 Siobhan: And same for this other dust mephit.

1:32:04 Brennan: Okay.

1:32:05 Siobhan: Right here with the purple worm.

1:32:06 Brennan: Moves away, worm snatches it up. He instantly devours it, uses its reaction to do so, which is pretty big news for Gorgug, and it's gonna roll. Makes its Con save.

1:32:16 Siobhan: Okay, great. Now… Ooh, do I wanna—

1:32:22 Brennan: These mephits were goddamn heroes out here. Okay.

1:32:27 Emily: I'll never look at dust the same way again.

1:32:31 Siobhan: I'm going to cast Bigby's Hand at a 7th level.

1:32:35 Brennan: Holy shit!

1:32:36 Lou: Just warming up.

1:32:36 Siobhan: 7th level. So I'm going to do a Clenched Fist attack against the purple worm.

1:32:44 Brennan: Ooh, okay. Go for it.

1:32:46 Ally: Do you have a mini for that?

1:32:47 Emily: Yeah, you do.

1:32:47 Ally: A maxi?

1:32:48 Siobhan: Oh, I do have a maxi.

1:32:51 Brennan: Bam, a fist of arcane energy is gonna come and sucker punch this fucking purple worm in the back of the head.

1:33:00 Siobhan: Oh, Bless. 19? Does a 19 hit?

1:33:04 Brennan: 19 hits.

1:33:04 Siobhan: Great, okay.

1:33:06 Brennan: This Bless, the amount of misses this Bless alone has turned into hits—

1:33:10 Siobhan: Truly. So that's 8d8.

1:33:14 Brennan: Wow.

1:33:15 Zac: You need some d8s?

1:33:15 Ally: Yeah, you need some d8s?

1:33:17 Siobhan: Sure, yeah, send me your kids. I need four kids.

1:33:20 Ally: Here you go.

1:33:20 Lou: There you go.

1:33:21 Siobhan: Great. [kids rattling] Okay.

1:33:25 Lou: My kid got a seven.

1:33:26 Ally: My kid got a one.

1:33:28 Siobhan: 34 damage.

1:33:30 Brennan: 34 damage. Talk about Adaine's Furious Fist. This massive arcane fist punches the purple worm in the head. That is your action.

1:33:45 Siobhan: I am going to bonus action True Strike again, just to keep Dodge on me.

1:33:49 Brennan: Hell, yeah.

1:33:52 Siobhan: And actually, I'm gonna move over to Gorgug's desk and pull his last biology test out.

1:33:57 Zac: Thank you.

1:33:57 Murph: Nice.

1:33:58 Brennan: This is your last one.

1:33:58 Siobhan: Yeah.

1:34:00 Brennan: A perfect grade in the Last Stand-ard Exam will save all of you from expulsion, keep you all on your tracks, it will totally undo this, and it will keep all of your extracurriculars on your academic resume. This is a 45 second—

1:34:17 Siobhan: Fuck.

1:34:20 Brennan: ...exam. Biology, final question.

1:34:24 Ally: Oh my god, I'm gonna throw up.

1:34:26 Brennan: Begin.

1:34:27 Zac: “Of the following creatures, which cannot turn its prey into stone? Basilisk, cockatrice, gorgon, manticore.”

1:34:33 Siobhan: I believe it's manticore.

1:34:34 Emily: Yeah, I was gonna say manticore.

1:34:35 Zac: [to the other side of the table] Manticore?

1:34:35 Lou: I agree.

1:34:37 Siobhan: I know that the cockatrice can. Gorgon can.

1:34:38 Emily: Basilisk can, cockatrice can, gorgon can.

1:34:40 Zac: Manticore. D, manticore.

1:34:40 Emily: I think basilisk can, too.

1:34:42 Brennan: Correct! That is correct.

1:34:46 Emily: Whoa!

1:34:48 Lou: Wow, and I thought it was gonna be about docking.

1:34:49 Murph: I didn't know anything about gorgons.

1:34:51 Siobhan: I was fully ready for docking.

1:34:52 Emily: I knew that because in our home game—

1:34:54 Zac: Gorgon was the thing that started—

1:34:56 Emily: ...the cockatrice is what got—

1:34:58 Murph: Travis.

1:34:58 Emily: ...Travis's character.

1:35:00 Siobhan: Yes.

1:35:00 Emily: A gorgon literally did that. I know a basilisk can.

1:35:01 Ally: Wow.

1:35:04 Murph: Didn't clock that the first guy was a gorgon.

1:35:05 Ally: Is the rope guy dead?

1:35:07 Brennan: Rope guy's dead. Riz shot him. Fucking dead. And you know what, a little piece of the art department that I am so happy to say, I never had to use. [reveals a “FAIL” stamp] How about that? Zac holds his hand out. Brennan hands him the stamp.

1:35:18 Siobhan: Put it on your forehead. Zac does a stamp trick.

1:35:20 Zac: I didn't really wanna throw it.

1:35:24 Brennan: Unbelievable. Siobhan stamps a paper in front of Zac.

1:35:25 Zac: [faux concerned] No! [smiles] [Siobhan laughs]

1:35:26 Brennan: You see Gavin, still writing, goes,

1:35:30 Gavin Pundle: Way to go.

1:35:31 Ally: Okay.

1:35:31 Gavin Pundle: Way to go.

1:35:32 Siobhan: Okay, all right. Okay.

1:35:33 Fig: Gavin, can we hang out after this?

1:35:34 Ally: The biggest reaction we've gotten. I wanna get a beer with this guy.

1:35:37 Siobhan: I like this guy.

1:35:37 Emily: I wanna get a beer with this guy.

1:35:39 Siobhan: I feel like he's a good teacher.

1:35:40 Emily: I'm straight edge and I wanna get a beer with this guy.

1:35:41 Brennan: Okay, that's you. Object interaction. Adaine, that's the end of your turn, correct?

1:35:45 Siobhan: That's the end of my turn.

1:35:46 Brennan: Okay. Manticore still, you're holding Concentration. That is going to be the wyvern. Its turn starts.

1:35:53 Emily: Okay, so it's gonna take—

1:35:53 Siobhan: It's blind.

1:35:55 Emily: It's blinded. It has to do a Wisdom save or take… Damn, I rolled so many ones.

1:36:01 Brennan: I'm gonna say these saves, its hit point total right now is really riding the line, so this save really matters. Every point of damage matters for this one. It adds plus one, so it needs a 16 or higher in front of the board to save. Five. Okay.

1:36:18 Emily: It takes 16 radiant damage.

1:36:18 Brennan: 16 radiant.

1:36:21 Emily: Its speed is halved, and if it moves, it will take more damage from the Booming Blade.

1:36:27 Brennan: Go ahead and roll for Booming Blade right now.

1:36:30 Emily: Because it was a crit, thanks to Adaine, 19 more damage.

1:36:35 Brennan: With seven hit points left, go ahead and describe for me what happens as this wyvern tries to peel away from you in midair.

1:36:44 Emily: I think I look at it and I say,

1:36:47 Fig: The fighting's over. It's all love now.

1:36:49 Emily: And I lean in for a kiss.

1:36:52 Brennan: The wyvern, confused, goes [screeches] and dies.

1:36:59 Riz: What's going on up there?

1:36:59 Fabian: Fig!

1:37:00 Ally: I see the whole thing and I'm like—

1:37:01 Emily: ...in my arms, but can I try and get it to land on this for bludgeoning damage?

1:37:07 Brennan: Yeah, I'll roll in front of the board. You want high. That's an 18. The wyvern—

1:37:11 Ally: You kiss it and it lands.

1:37:14 Brennan: So I'm gonna say, the pentacorn was about to take a legendary action at the end of Adaine's turn, but instead has to use its legendary action to shrug off a dead wyvern's body.

1:37:24 Siobhan: Hell yes. [Brennan whinnies in displeasure]

1:37:26 Brennan: The wyvern is no more. Look, the field is littered with your foes! Okay, it is a goner. Back at the top of the order, Riz, you see the alarms start going—

1:37:42 Lou: What?

1:37:42 Brennan: ...for the next wave, and suddenly you see Gavin hit something on his watch and say,

1:37:47 Gavin Pundle: Written portion of the exam passed. Final wave.

1:37:50 Brennan: And points to the wave that is already on the field. [players sighing in relief]

1:37:53 Emily: Oh my god!

1:37:54 Brennan: You answered those questions just in the nick of time.

1:37:58 Ally: Nice.

1:38:00 Brennan: So that is Riz Gukgak's turn. The waves are completed. There are no new monsters being introduced.

1:38:07 Murph: So, a little worried about the umber hulk burrowing. Afraid that might get up there. Now that we've answered all of the questions, does Gavin dying matter?

1:38:15 Brennan: Gavin dying still extremely matters.

1:38:17 Murph: Got it. Okay.

1:38:17 Lou: Unless we kill each other. [Siobhan giggles] Zac pretends to ax his own neck.

1:38:22 Murph: Do you guys think I should get into a position to stop the umber hulk if he's gonna go after Gavin?

1:38:29 Siobhan: Yeah, maybe just to guard Gavin would be useful, if you can get up there.

1:38:32 Emily: Don't you still have Haste? So you still have two actions.

1:38:34 Murph: Yeah, so I can still attack twice, essentially. Okay, so I will do—

1:38:40 Emily: Whenever he pops up.

1:38:41 Murph: Yeah, so I'll do, just so I have view of everything, I'll use all my movement, so 5, 10, 15, 20, 25, and then Misty Step however far I can get, 30 feet, up near Kristen.

1:38:54 Brennan: Cool, yeah.

1:38:56 Ally: Nice.

1:38:58 Brennan: Cool, you're right here. You can get basically to the ledge.

1:39:03 Murph: That's what I will do, and then I will take… Okay, so we've got—

1:39:09 Brennan: Pentacorn, purple worm. Wyvern is dead. Crab man, rust monsters, and somewhere, an umber hulk burrowing.

1:39:14 Murph: Okay, I will shoot the… I'll shoot the crab? Or should I just go purple worm?

1:39:21 Fabian: I can handle this!

1:39:21 Riz: You good? Doesn't look great down there.

1:39:27 Murph: Cool, okay, so then with Bless—

1:39:29 Kristen: It's bending you backwards like a weird swing dance move.

1:39:32 Fabian: No, that's me. I'm much more limber now.

1:39:35 Murph: Ooh, not good. Not good at all. Really bad. Only 14.

1:39:40 Brennan: Who are you firing at?

1:39:42 Murph: Purple worm.

1:39:42 Brennan: 14 does not hit.

1:39:44 Murph: Cool, then I will prepare a reaction. If I see the umber hulk pop out, I'll take a shot.

1:39:51 Brennan: Attack. Take a shot, gotcha. Cool, cool, cool. Fabian, that is your turn.

1:39:55 Lou: Okay, so I'm restrained.

1:39:55 Brennan: You're grappled. There is an escape check, but it takes an action to do.

1:40:01 Lou: Okay, got it. Could the Hangman attempt to free me?

1:40:07 Brennan: He could make a shove attack on you or the crab man.

1:40:09 Lou: Got it.

1:40:12 Murph: I think you could also attack while grappled.

1:40:14 Brennan: You can attack while grappled.

1:40:15 Siobhan: And it's not disadvantage.

1:40:15 Brennan: It's not disadvantage.

1:40:18 Lou: All right, I'll just attack from within its clutches.

1:40:21 Brennan: Go for it.

1:40:21 Lou: First attack.

1:40:24 Brennan: Hits.

1:40:25 Lou: Great. Second attack is a 28 to hit.

1:40:32 Brennan: Hell, yeah.

1:40:32 Lou: So we'll roll the first one. Burn a 1st level spell slot on Fandrangor.

1:40:36 Ally: Can you Trip attack this and get him off of you?

1:40:38 Lou: I'm sadly all out. I'm tapped. [dice rolling]

1:40:45 Lou: 20 points of damage on the first attack.

1:40:46 Brennan: Okay.

1:40:48 Lou: We'll burn a 3rd level spell slot on the second one.

1:40:50 Ally: A little sauce on it.

1:40:50 Lou: Put a little sauce on it. A little sauce on this crab. [dice rolling] Oh, god!

1:40:57 Siobhan: [laughs] It just went flying.

1:40:59 Lou: That'll be five, eight, 13, 22 points of damage on the second attack.

1:41:06 Brennan: Crab man looking fucked up as Fandrangor [grunting] through the carapace. End of your turn—

1:41:11 Lou: Oh, I'm not done.

1:41:13 Brennan: Okay.

1:41:15 Lou: Hangman's gonna try and recharge breath weapon.

1:41:17 Ally: Come on!

1:41:17 Brennan: Okay.

1:41:18 Lou: Doesn't, but will take a bite attack with advantage 'cause of Pack Tactics.

1:41:21 Brennan: Let's go.

1:41:24 Lou: That's a nat—

1:41:24 Ally: 20!

1:41:25 Siobhan: Two crits.

1:41:25 Brennan: Two crits for two attacks?

1:41:28 Ally: Two crits?

1:41:28 Lou: Two crits.

1:41:29 Siobhan: No, it was with advantage.

1:41:30 Brennan: With advantage. Okay, gotcha.

1:41:31 Lou: With advantage.

1:41:31 Brennan: Cool, cool, cool.

1:41:32 Emily: Oh my god!

1:41:32 Brennan: Go ahead and roll damage.

1:41:34 Lou: There it is.

1:41:34 Ally: You rolled two 20s?

1:41:36 Lou: Two 20s.

1:41:36 Emily: Oh my god.

1:41:37 Lou: But oh, I also forgot—

1:41:38 Siobhan: Where's that roll been the whole—

1:41:39 Lou: Jesus, I also forgot that he does 2d6 fire damage, so this is 4d6 fire damage and 2d8 piercing damage.

1:41:48 Emily: Yes!

1:41:48 Ally: Wow.

1:41:50 Siobhan: So strong.

1:41:50 Ally: That's right.

1:41:51 Lou: 4, 15.

1:41:53 Zac: Where's Hangman been?

1:41:53 Lou: 23 points of damage as Hangman takes a quick bite.

1:42:00 Brennan: One, two. Oh, it's not quick. You hear the Hangman behind you saying,

1:42:03 Hangman: Unhand my master, you crawling, quivering crustacean! [shouts]

1:42:10 Brennan: And he bites the fucking head off and swallows it.

1:42:14 Emily: Save the meat!

1:42:14 Siobhan: Yes, the fire damage.

1:42:15 Ally: Yeah, with fire, right?

1:42:17 Siobhan: Once again, smells so buttery.

1:42:19 Emily: Save the meat!

1:42:19 Lou: I'm hungry.

1:42:22 Ally: Do you guys think the blobs, were they butter? Everything smells delicious.

1:42:27 Brennan: Unbelievable turn. Crab man is down.

1:42:29 Siobhan: Movie theater popcorn. Zac mimes pushing a pump for movie theater butter.

1:42:29 Lou: And then last thing, I will Second Wind, so I'll roll a d10 plus six.

1:42:35 Brennan: Mimic is still working on Adaine.

1:42:38 Siobhan: Right, try to hit me, bitch.

1:42:39 Brennan: Rolls a two. Mimic is looking, frankly, tired. Mimic is looking tired.

1:42:43 Ally: [laughs] [weird voice] “Is the test over?”

1:42:47 Zac: [same weird voice] “Can it be?”

1:42:47 Ally: Can it be?

1:42:49 Brennan: And crab man was about to go, but you don't get to go if you're fucking dead.

1:42:52 Lou: What's up?

1:42:53 Brennan: Okay. Figueroth Faeth, that is your turn.

1:42:57 Emily: You guys want me on this pentacorn?

1:42:58 Siobhan: Yeah, I think so.

1:42:58 Lou: I think so.

1:43:00 Brennan: Oh, sorry, and at the end of Fabian's turn, the pentacorn uses a legendary to charge Adaine, but does not make an attack, it just legendary moves.

1:43:08 Emily: Yeah, I think I'm just gonna have to try to hit it. I’m gonna try to just hit it on my own.

1:43:17 Ally: Come on.

1:43:17 Emily: Come on!

1:43:19 Lou: ♪ Come on ♪

1:43:19 Emily: Okay, got a plus two to the Bless. [die rolling] Okay, that's gonna hit! That is 23 to hit.

1:43:29 Brennan: 23 hits!

1:43:30 Emily: Great, we're doing another Booming Blade, another Smite.

1:43:33 Ally: Nice!

1:43:33 Lou: Chop, chop, chop, chop!

1:43:36 Emily: I'm just gonna roll it on here. That is just a devastating amount of ones. Okay, 34 damage.

1:43:42 Brennan: The pentacorn takes another mighty blow. [whinnies]

1:43:46 Emily: And I'm gonna have the pegasus go after it.

1:43:47 Brennan: Hell, yeah.

1:43:47 Siobhan: Horsie versus horsie.

1:43:51 Emily: That's gonna be a miss.

1:43:51 Lou: Ride on 'em, dude. Ride on 'em.

1:43:52 Brennan: That is a miss. End of Fig's turn, it's gonna use its last legendary action to take a swing at Adaine. That is a hit.

1:43:59 Siobhan: Shield.

1:43:59 Emily: Cutting Words.

1:44:00 Brennan: Ooh!

1:44:00 Emily: Oh wait, I'm a d10 now.

1:44:02 Zac: Adaine Shielded as well.

1:44:02 Emily: Oh, she Shielded.

1:44:04 Brennan: Okay, Shield from Adaine. That makes your AC a 20?

1:44:08 Siobhan: 20.

1:44:08 Brennan: It still hits on a 20.

1:44:11 Emily: 10, minus 10. I rolled a 10 on my Cutting Words.

1:44:14 Brennan: Yeah, it does not hit. What do you say, as you Shield, what do you say to this pentacorn as it attacks?

1:44:21 Emily: I say,

1:44:21 Fig: The fighting's over. It's all love now. [players laugh]

1:44:26 Brennan: The pentacorn goes—

1:44:26 Adaine: You heard her!

1:44:28 Kristen: What the fuck? Is Fig vegan now? What's going on?

1:44:30 Brennan: Honestly, I'm gonna say that we start at a DC—

1:44:34 Emily: I put my orangutan mask on for Animal Friendship.